


Song of the Sun

by amamiya_toki



Series: Song of the Sun [1]
Category: IDOLiSH7 (Video Game)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Healing, Kindergarten, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV First Person, Psychological Trauma, Rape, Twincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-24
Updated: 2018-04-01
Packaged: 2018-12-06 09:42:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 57
Words: 114,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11598018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amamiya_toki/pseuds/amamiya_toki
Summary: Nanase Riku was born a Beta, like the rest of his family. His older brother, Tenn, was not. Instead, he was an Omega. Not aware of the implications behind that, Riku committed the gravest sin, one that was akin to betraying the brother who he loved dearly which led to Tenn leaving home without a word. Five and a half years later, he is finally reunited with him, in the most unexpected of places.





	1. Prologue - Riku

**Author's Note:**

> This is another half-written thing that I found in my Evernote app, cleaned up and decided to post. I'm probably going to continue this, I'm not sure when. Or how. I don't even have a solid plan for this... yet. In the first place, this probably came about because I just wanted to write angst.
> 
> I can't remember which ABO setting I took this from (not from @orpheusheart I'm sure) since I wrote this a few months back.
> 
> Edit: this became a proper series!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

My name is Nanase Riku.

I will be turning twenty-four this coming summer.

I had been living on my own since I entered university and got a job at a nearby kindergarten as an assistant teacher as soon as I had graduated. I love children, which was why I chose to work where I am now.

I have friends, quite a few of them even. Everyone says that I am the cheerful and energetic type of person, which makes it easy for me to get along with others even in new environments.

However, if there is one thing you would need to know about me, is that I am the most terrible person in the world.

My family consisted of my parents and my older brother. We were as normal as any other family, living in an ordinary neighbourhood in the city.

At least, that was what I used to think.

I have not seen my older brother... Nanase Tenn, in more than five years.

As a child, I was born with a weak constitution. I spent most of my childhood in and out of the hospital, more of the former than the latter. I hated being sickly, as much as I hated the hospital. However, I was able to bear with everything because I had Tenn-nii with me.

Because our parents were always busy with the family business, I spent more time with Tenn-nii than anyone else. When I was at home, he would play with or read to me, when we were older he began to cook our meals as well. When I was in the hospital, he would come by during visiting hours and stay with me, just so that I would not feel lonely. When he became of schooling age, he would always visit right after school. He could have played and got along with others and made friends, but instead, he chose me over everyone else.

Yet, I had betrayed that kind and gentle Tenn-nii, who cared for me more than anyone else.

It is customary for every child in their last year of elementary school to undergo a certain test. This was related to a part of our curriculum, where we were taught about the human body and the reproductive system.

Humans are no longer only distinguished by their primary sex: male and female but are further categorised into a secondary sex: Alpha, Beta and Omega. The difference between the three categories is vast, especially in their ability to reproduce.

Betas are the most common, comprising of about ninety percent of the population. Alphas are seen to be at the top of society, born with talents and skills that set them apart from the Betas. You could call them the high-flyers of society. The last of the three were the Omegas. Even though they only comprise less than one percent of the population, they are the most fertile and suitable for bearing children. However, because they experience regular heats that affect their daily lives, they are ostracised by society.

As far as I knew, both my parents were Betas. It may have been written in the family register, but I did not need to check to know. That was the reason why I had not been surprised when my report indicated that I was a Beta.

The greatest surprise was that Tenn-nii was not a Beta. The word "Omega" was written in his report, and no one in the family knew how to react to that. At that point of time, I did not know what it meant to be an Omega. Things like heats and suppressants made no sense to me so I disregarded their importance, and the news only made Tenn-nii appear more special than he already was in my eyes.

As I went through middle and high school, my health had improved significantly. Although I was still hospitalised several times a year, the stays were shorter and less frequent. Perhaps due to this, I was disconnected to the reality of living with an omega.

Being ignorant was one of the many things I had regretted. I could not understand why my parents and teachers thought that Tenn-nii not having his heat despite being in high school was a bad thing. This was because I never bothered to know the significance of the heat, at least in the social context, in the first place.

That was why when it had finally came, and unexpectedly as well, I had no idea what to do... or rather, what I should not have done.

It was a warm summer day. Tenn-nii and I were completing the last of our summer homework in my room. We were eighteen then. That afternoon, our mother had gone out with her friends while our father was at work. Both of them would only be back in the evening, which left the two of us alone at home.

It was a sweltering day, so I failed to notice that Tenn-nii was sweating more than usual. It was only when it seemed that he was in pain that I had realised. I had panicked, unsure of what had happened.

However, before I could even speak, an alluring scent wafted up into my nose. I did not need to think to know that it was Tenn-nii's scent. It was sweet, like thick honey and vanilla, and it overpowered all my thoughts and senses. In fact, it was as if it was some sort of spell that made me lose control over myself.

The next thing I knew, I had Tenn-nii pinned beneath me. To me, at that point in time, he was no longer my beloved older brother. He was just a mere omega, fertile and in heat, waiting for someone to plant their seed and impregnate them.

At that time, I wanted to be that someone.

Tenn-nii was in tears, begging me to stop. However, those pleas did not reach my ears. He struggled to fend me off as I tugged his clothes off roughly, trying to push me off him. However, it was no use. It was not that I was stronger, but in that state, he was too weak to fend off my violent advance.

If I had known better, I would not have hurt him. I would not have slapped him when he resisted, nor would I have violated him, taking more than his virginity away from him.

I did not know how many times I ejaculated into him that day. I only came to my senses when my parents came home and pried me off him. I had regained my sense of self almost immediately after I heard my father's fierce yell. However, at that time, it was far too late.

The sight in front of me was nothing but a nightmare.

Tenn-nii's skin, once clear and fair, was littered with bruises that were starting to form. His smooth, pale pink hair was tousled and messy, hanging over his face to hide his expression. He was unable to move from where he was lying on the floor. And the one thing that burned itself into my memory, which I would never forget, was of his swollen hole. It was gaping open, as I had roughly thrust in and out of it countless times, and a white liquid was dripping out of it in a stream.

The only thing I could do is to break down. I felt nothing but regret and despair, believing that I had betrayed him.

My parents did not blame me for what happened. Instead, they blamed themselves for not making sure that I was well-informed about Tenn-nii, and for assuming that he would be safer with me because I was a Beta.

Tenn-nii, too, did not blame me. Rather, he did not speak a word to me.

After what I did that day, my parents had rushed him to the hospital. He had been warded for observation for a few weeks and was allowed to return home after that. I was not told about why he was made to stay for so long; I was too afraid to ask. In fact, I did not dare to speak or approach Tenn-nii, who never left his room since.

At that time, I was afraid that Tenn-nii would have come to hate me for what I have done more than anything else. I was afraid that he would not love me anymore.

Perhaps I should have said something at that time. I should have gathered the courage to apologise to him. Even if it was not sufficient to make up for what I have done to him, I should have gathered the courage to try.

It was only when we... mom, dad and I saw a note left on the dining table one morning that I realised that I had much more things that I regretted more than I had initially thought.

_I'm leaving. Don't look for me._

_\-- Tenn_

That was what had been written in his handwriting on the sheet of paper, with an empty glass to weigh it down.

Upon discovering it, we all ran up to his room.

There was no one inside.

There was also several items missing: his favourite duffel bag which he used when we went on family trips, as well as a few sets of clothes. The piggy bank that he used to contain his saving was present, but it had been empty. Most of all, the stuffed bear that he had treasured since he was a child. Returning to the entrance of our house, we also noticed that his sneakers were missing from the shoe cabinet.

Mom had broken down in tears at the realisation that Tenn-nii had really left, without saying farewell or telling us the reason why. Dad, too, was in disbelief as he held her tight.

The fact that no one blamed me made everything harder to accept.

It was much easier to be blamed, to be scolded, to be reprimanded. That was because I knew that I was in the wrong, and would have to shoulder the consequences.

However, losing Tenn-nii was the one thing I did not predict and was the hardest thing to accept.

Unlike me, Tenn-nii had his future laid out for him. Despite being an Omega, he was a brilliant student. He had many universities to choose to apply to, and many of them were prestigious ones. He would definitely be able to get a scholarship, and after graduating secure a job at a good company.

That was what everyone had hoped for him.

Yet, I took that away as well.

I stole everything away from Tenn-nii, and that was the gravest sin that I had committed.

Since his departure, I have heard nothing from Tenn-nii, or how he was doing. From what I know, it did not seem that our parents knew, either. They had decided to honour his wishes by not searching for him, instead hoping instead that he would return home to them one day.

Unable to bear with the loneliness and the regret, I had decided to attend a university located far from my home. That meant that I would have to move out of my home.

Naturally, my parents were against the idea. They claimed that I would not be able to look after myself, especially with my condition. However, I knew that they were also afraid that, like Tenn-nii, I would never return once I leave. After all, they already lost one of their sons... it would be too painful to lose the other as well.

However, my decision was final. I did return home on important holidays such as New Years and Obon, a promise I made to my parents when I had left, and I still do.

I was fortunate to find employment in the same neighbourhood that I was living in during university. After working there for the past two years, I have grown to love my job more than I expected. After all, it was fun being with the children. It also kept me busy, which left little time for me to think about Tenn-nii.

Perhaps somewhere in me, I had begun to give up on being able to meet Tenn-nii again. That was what I had believed, yet not a day passed without thinking about him.

Despite that, I did not think that I would be able to meet him again so soon, at a place and in a situation which I would never have expected.

**"Prologue - Riku" end**


	2. Chapter 1A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to write this in the style of a BL manga, which means I'm probably going to follow the story structure as well as the cliches and all. I think most of you should be able to see where the story is going, so I'm going to leave you to your guesses.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

"Bye-bye, Riku-sensei!"

"Take care, Sayaka-chan! See you next week!"

Today was like any typical day. My mornings always start at 5.30 am, when the alarm clock beside my bed rings. I would often feel sleepy despite having around six hours of sleep, but I had to prepare for work. Washing my face and having breakfast were the first things I had to do in the morning, as well as preparing my boxed lunch. The kindergarten was only a 20-minute walk away, and I would be the first few to arrive. After preparations for the day's activities, it was time to welcome the children in.

As I was a junior teacher, my main job was to assist the senior teacher, Tsumugi-sensei. She is the same age as me but had been working in this kindergarten since he finished high school.

Each of the school's three classes is named after a flower and comprises of a senior and junior teacher pair. My class is the Cherry class, while the other two were Peach and Plum. The Peach class was headed by Momo-sensei and assisted by Tamaki-sensei, while the Plum class was Yuki-sensei and Iori-sensei respectively.

At the present time, it was the end of the day for the children, and they were simply waiting for their parents or guardians to pick them up.

"Ah, Riku-kun, do you have a moment?"

"What is it, Headmaster?"

The Headmaster of the school is Takanashi Otoharu who is also Tsumugi-sensei's father. He has a kind and fatherly feel to him, and the children adore him.

"I would need a favour from you. Do you have any plans tonight?"

"No, I don't."

"If you don't mind, I would need you to help look after a child from the Plum class. His parent called to inform us that the family's caretaker had sprained her back and is unable to come for him. They have just finished work and is on their way, but it takes more than an hour to travel here. Yuki-kun and Iori-kun are both occupied so it would be great if you could help out…"

I have never interacted with the children from another class, but I could not refuse that request as I felt sorry for the child. "Sure, I don't mind. Should I go over to the Plum class when I'm done sending off the children?"

"Oh, that would be of great help. Banri-kun is staying late to complete some accounting in the office, so he will lock up before he leaves. Just let him know once you have sent the child off."

Banri-san is not a teacher in the school, but he helps out with a lot of things. His job is to handle administrative matters, but he's good with cooking and popular with the children as well. It seems that he, Momo-sensei and Yuki-sensei have known each other for a long time and are close friends.

"Got it!"

After leaving me the name of the child, the Headmaster hurried off. It seemed that he had some matters of his own to handle as well, which I did not inquire about.

It was not long before I sent the last child from my class off; the parents and caregivers were fortunately punctual for the children in my class. After bidding farewell for the week to Tsumugi-sensei, I gathered my things and went over to the Plum class.

"Iori, sorry I'm late!"

"It's fine, Nanase-san. I should be the one to apologise instead, to have to trouble you with this matter."

"It's no biggie. I'll take over from here."

"Thank you." Iori then turned to the child, who was glancing at us from a distance. He did not seem scared, but rather barely had any expression on his face. "Sorata-kun, this is Riku-sensei; I told you about him earlier. He will be looking after you until your mother comes."

"Un." The child… Kujou Sorata's only response to his teacher's words was a nod and a small sound.

Iori quickly excused himself and left us, so it was just me and the child in the large classroom.

I sat next to him, although there was a small distance between us. I have not interacted with any of the children from the other classes before, but the silence between us felt a bit awkward. In my experience, I have met quiet children like him before, who was okay with and preferred being left alone.

He had a picture book held in his small hands, which he was looking at with great interest. I took a glimpse of the cover—"The Sun-bridge to Heaven". It was a familiar and nostalgic title, as it had been my favourite when I was a child.

When I was in the hospital, there was a small library with all sorts of picture books in the playroom. I was allowed to bring them to my bed to read. Often he... Tenn-nii would read them to me when he comes to visit, sometimes act out the scenes in the story for my enjoyment.

It was this story, in particular, that I enjoyed hearing him tell the most. It was the tale of a young farmer who had fallen in love with a beautiful woman whom he met by a river. He begged for her to marry him, and she agreed if he would swear to never break one peculiar promise. However, as with most stories, he did break it and learnt that his wife was a goddess from heaven. Distraught and in despair from her husband's betrayal, she returned to the heavens in despair.

Regretting his actions, the man set out to find a way to the heavens to take her back. On his journey, he learns from a shaman that the only way he could go there was to have the sun to make him a bridge of sunlight. 

The sun, however, will not do it for free: the man had to complete an almost impossible task. It took him many, many years to complete the task but his desire to meet his beloved again allowed him to persevere. The sun took pity on him and built him a bridge with its golden rays. It also taught him a special song that would help him to win back the heart of his beloved.

When the man reached heaven, he was tired and took a rest by a clear river. It reminded him of the day he met his wife, and he wept bitterly. In his sadness, he began to sing the song that the sun had taught him. It reached the ears of everyone in heaven. Hearing his song, the goddess wept, her heart overcome with love for him. She went to his side and dried his tears, forgiving him for his sin.

She returned home with him to the human world, and as with every story, they lived happily ever after.

But, unlike characters in the story, happiness was the one thing that I do not deserve.

Tenn-nii... just thinking of his name makes my chest ache.

Is he well, I wonder?

" —ey. Hey. Are you okay? Are you hurt somewhere?"

The child's voice made me realised that I had accidentally slipped into my thoughts again, which is what I tend to do when I'm on my own. I could see the hint of worry in his large eyes.

"I-I'm fine. Thanks for asking."

"But you're not. You were crying." And he was right, I was. "Mama always says the same thing. Mama always puts on sad faces when he is alone. He always tries to hide it from Sorata. But Sorata knows. You're just like Mama."

"Oh..." What kind of environment did this child grow up in, I wonder? Somehow, he felt more mature than I am, despite being the adult. "But I'm fine, really."

He did not seem to believe me but his little hand, which he had placed on my leg, felt comforting. However, I cannot let a child worry for me like this. I was supposed to be the one looking after him, not the other way around.

Maybe changing the topic would help?

"I think I'm probably just a little sad because I'm hungry. Shall we make something to eat?" He gave a nod in response. "How does pancakes sound?"

At the mention of the dish, Sorata's face lit up. Compared to his emotionless expression earlier, he seemed like a different child. It was rather refreshing, and I do not dislike that.

"Pancakes!" He chirped with so much excitement it seemed that he would burst.

Seeing his enthusiasm made me smile at how adorable he was. It reminded me of myself of the time when I was still a child who knew nothing of the world.

I gave his dark pink hair a gentle pat and stood up from the cushion I was sitting on, extending my hand to him. "Shall we go to the kitchen, then?"

"Let's!" He bounced up onto his feet, taking my hand.

As I led him to the kitchen, which was used for classes, I pondered over I could make that was both nutritious and delicious. "We should still have some blueberries left from today's class, so shall we make blueberry pancakes?"

"Sorata like all kinds of berries!"

"Good, let's go with that, then!"

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I came up with the title "Song of the Sun" I actually had no meanings behind it. It was purely on a whim. 
> 
> But when I got the motivation to continue I thought I should have some meaning and crafted the tale in this story, "The Sun-bridge to Heaven". I always wanted to try crafting children's stories, so if anyone is interested in the full version do leave a comment and I'll post it up when it's in proper-story form (I only drafted it in point form).


	3. Chapter 1B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually finished this before I posted [The Nanase Family's Late Christmas Dinner](http://archiveofourown.org/works/13177563) but I forgot about it until I saw it this morning. Hope to finish [Dirty Little Surprise](http://archiveofourown.org/works/12912456) by the end of the year tho.
> 
> Please note the POV notes at the start of each chapter from now on as I intend to switch them around.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

When we reached the kitchen, I sat Sorata down at one of the small tables meant for the children.

As I gathered the ingredients, I told him to wait for me to make the pancakes I promised him, but he asked to help. I knew he was probably tired from the day's activities and wanted him to rest, but he seemed to have none of that.

"I help Mama in the kitchen all the time," was what he insisted when I tried to come up with another reason why he should have stayed put.

However, he was stubborn about helping me, and I gave in.

After retrieving all the ingredients and tools we needed and placing them on the kitchen counter, I fetched us aprons used during cooking activities. I helped him to put his—one that was littered with yellow polka dots—on, over his baby blue smock to prevent it from getting dirty. I changed out my own maroon apron which I wore in the classroom to a matching dark yellow one.

Sorata was surprisingly a chatty child. As I helped him on with his apron, he began telling me about his own at home. Perhaps he just shy and needed time to warm up to me, like most children would.

"Sorata-kun, what kind of food do you help your Mama make at home?"

"Pancakes! Because Mama loves them like Sorata does! And… and green salad, and putting bread in the toastie! Mama likes cooking, but Mama's always busy with work, so I help Aunt Mimi instead!"

"Is this Aunt Mimi your mother's sister?"

"Nuh-uh. Aunt Mimi comes to look after Sorata when Mama's busy. Aunt Mimi is very nice and gentle and loves Sorata like Mama does. Aunt Mimi says Sorata like her gra… grandson? Sorata doesn't know about that kinda thing since Sorata has ever met Mama's Papa and Mama."

From his description, I gathered that he was referring to his family's caretaker. The Headmaster did mention that she sprained her back, so she must be an older lady. But it seems like his mother is an Omega male… which was not surprising that he would not know his grandparents.

In many families, it seemed that Omega males were often seen as a disgrace to the family and it is not uncommon that they would be cast out of their home. I learnt about this after reading up about Omegas on the internet after what I did to Tenn-nii. After reading all the stories, most of them tragic, I realised how important it was that my parents probably accepted Tenn-nii despite him being an Omega… but because of me, he lost his place to belong.

Just thinking about it makes my heart sink with guilt.

"What about your Papa, Sorata-kun? What kind of person is he like?"

I asked the question without thinking, which was probably a cruel thing. Sorata, which had been bubbly just moments ago, was now silent. I felt like kicking myself for making him wear a sad expression on his face.

"Sorata doesn't have a Papa. Sorata doesn't know who his Papa is."

"Oh…"

"But, Sorata doesn't need a Papa. All Sorata needs is Mama. Mama also said that he only needs Sorata. That's why Sorata doesn't need a Papa."

"I see… you must be really close with your Mama. Do you love your Mama?"

"Yeah! Lots! And Mama loves Sorata lots too!"

"That's great. Now, let's start making those pancakes… Sorata, do you know how to crack eggs into a bowl?"

"Leave it to Sorata!"

"Be careful, okay? You can put the shells inside this plastic bag when you are done. I'll measure out the rest of the ingredients."

"Okay!"

As I often made pancakes for myself, I remembered the list of ingredients and the recipe by heart. I measured out just enough for each ingredient into separate bowls and cups, returning the original containers to their place when I was done.

I had just begun to sift the flour and baking powder when Sorata declared he was done with the eggs. I had noticed that there was a small piece of eggshell that had fallen into the bowl and helped to scoop it out with a wooden spoon after I was done. Sorata helped to pour in the rest of the ingredients into the mixing bowl as per my instructions. He wanted to help mix it after he did so, but got tired after a few minutes. I took over from him and had him sit back down so I could cook them. I usually preferred syrup over my pancakes, but the school's pantry only had honey so I had to make do with that.

I plated a serving for each of us and brought it to the table where Sorata was eagerly waiting.

"Pancakes!" He cheered as I set the plastic plate in front of him.

"There's some honey here to go with it. Let's tuck in, shall we?"

"Let's!"

We gave our thanks and began eating. I watched Sorata the entire time as I did so, noting his joyful expression as he cut up the pancakes into smaller pieces with his fork before popping one piece into his mouth. He did not need me to remind him to chew his food properly, as he was eating slowly. It almost seemed as if he was carefully savouring each bite.

"Is it yummy?"

"It is! Just like Mama's!"

"That's great. Let's hope that your mother will reach by the time we are done eating."

Sorata nodded in agreement, his mouth too full to speak.

"Ah, but speaking of which, what does your mother do for work?"

"Mama's a fashion model?"

"Really?" I do not read magazines, nor have I had any interest in them, so it may not be a surprise that I do not know. "Your mother must be a very pretty person."

"The prettiest in the world!"

We returned to the classroom after we finished eating and washing the dishes and utensils. I offered to read him a story, which he picked off the shelf. I thought he would have picked "The Sun-bridge to Heaven", but he had chosen something else instead.

"The Tale of Kachi-Kachi Mountain?" I was not fond of this story, but I could not refuse a request from a child.

It was a story about a rabbit who helps an old man take revenge on an evil tanuki. The tanuki was shown kindness by the old man, yet he betrayed him in the most treacherous way possible. The rabbit, who was a friend of the old man, swore to take revenge on the ungrateful tanuki. It played many tricks on the tanuki... all intended to harm him. The tanuki dd not suspect anything at all. After several tries, the rabbit managed to take its revenge.

I know well enough why I did not like this story. I am like that tanuki in the story. All that was lacking was a rabbit to punish me for my sins.

"Riku-sensei, is something the matter?"

"No, I'm fine. Let's begin the story."

As I read to him, Sorata sat still and listened attentively. However, when we were about halfway through the story, he suddenly jolted upright, like a cat when it senses something approaching it.

"Sorata? Is something wrong?"

"Mama's coming!"

"Eh?

"I can tell! Mama's almost here!"

This was not the first time that I had seen something like this. A few children that had been under my care exhibited this very same behaviour before, and often their instincts were right. It was too frequent to be a coincidence. "We should get your things ready, then!"

Along the walls of each classroom, there were two-tier shelves that served as cubby holes for the children to put their belongings. Each one had their name on it, a way to teach the children how to read and recognise their own name.

Sorata gathered his things into his bag, although there was little to pack as most of the items were already inside. He hoisted it up onto his shoulders and bounced over to the front door to put on his shoes. I could only watch from afar as he did everything on his own.

"Sorata!" The sliding door was opened so fast and so hard, it gave me a bit of a shock. "I'm sorry I'm late!"

Sorata's mother was, most definitely, male despite him having slightly wavy long hair that was tied into a simple but stylish ponytail. Even the way he dressed could only be described as that: I have never seen anyone wear a long-sleeved T-shirt, vest and black trousers and made the combination look so good. However, because of the sunglasses he wore, I was unable to see his face clearly.

Despite that, I could not help but feel that I have met him before. Could I have met him somewhere before...? I was sure that it was not during parents day or any of the schools' events.

"Mama!" Sorata leapt forward to hug his mother, who bent down to take the child into his arms. "It's fine! I had Riku-sensei here to accompany me."

"Riku... sensei... you said?"

Eh?

His voice... the way he spoke my name... why does it sound so familiar?

And, that scent... it was masked by the musky smell of cologne, but I could detect a faint sweetness beneath it. Mild like vanilla and rich like honey. Just like his... Just like Tenn-nii's.

It cannot be... can it?

But, how?

Why?

And, was it really him?

I was on my feet before I was even aware of it. However, I was unable to take a single step forward towards them.

"I'm sorry," My voice was trembling. Why? "But could you be—"

"Thank you for staying back so late to look after Sorata." He flashed me a quick smile but seemed to be in too much of a rush to leave "But we have plans and need to be on our way. Come Sorata, let's go home."

"Ah! Mama! Wait!" Sorata protested as his mother pulled him by the hand, walking too fast for the child to catch up. "Bye-bye, Riku-sensei!"

"Wait!" I called out, but it seems like my voice did not reach them.

I was too late. Again.

"Don't go..."

I felt tears pool in my eyes, clouding my vision as I reached my hand out towards the open door. The strength in my knees gave way, and I found myself sitting on the floor again. My chest is so tight, so hot that it was uncomfortable. It was as if it had been set ablaze.

Why does it hurt so much?

That morning, the note he left behind told us not to look for him. I could have ignored his selfish request and gone to search for him the past few years. Yet I chose not to do that because I felt that I did not deserve to meet him again.

Yet, when he finally appeared in front of me after so long... I did not know what to think or do. There was so much I wanted to say to him that I did not know where to begin. Despite that, I could not hold back these feelings of yearning, regret and sorrow that had built up in his absence.

Even if he would not be willing to forgive me... even if it is something that I do not deserve... even if it takes a miracle, please let me be by his side one last time.

But... it seems like he would not give me another chance, would he?

"Don't leave me behind again... Tenn-nii..."

_"Chapter 1" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I modelled this Tenn's appearance after SolidS's Sera Rikka. He was the first character that came to mind when I was racking my brains for a reference.


	4. Prologue - Tenn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't intend to continue this seriously when I first wrote this, but now that I got a proper plot I'm going to make some edits to the existing parts that had been uploaded. If you had read this before, I would have to trouble you to re-read them again, just in case.  
>    
>  **Written in Tenn's POV**

Even though it had been at least twelve years ago, I could still recall the horror on my parents' faces when they learnt of my secondary sex.

A compulsory test was conducted for each sixth-grade student. At the beginning of the school year, a team of medics would take a sample of blood from each child to perform that test, and a report sealed in an envelope will be returned to them several months later.

Mine arrived just around my birthday. Unlike some of my classmates, who eagerly opened the envelope the moment it got into their hands, I simply put mine in my backpack. As it was an important matter, I wanted to open it at home with my parents around. Riku did his test while he was in the hospital and was found to be a Beta. Being twins, I figured I would be the same as well.

At that time, Riku and I were under the impression that both our parents were Betas. As children, we had once asked our mother about her secondary sex after the television programme we were watching mentioned it. She was a Beta, a normal person. Because we had always considered our family to be normal, we concluded that our father was the same, and expected ourselves to be as well.

That was why when the report listed that I was an Omega, I was stunned.

It was also then I learnt that my father was not a Beta, but an Alpha. He had been born from two Alpha parents and he and his siblings were, too, Alphas. The only person who was not an alpha was his paternal grandmother, who was an Omega male like I was. My mother's side of the family were all Betas.

It was not unheard of that an Omega child would be born to non-Omega parents. It was rare, but as long as there had been one in the family lineage there would always be a possibility.

I could not comprehend why my parents had taken to me being an Omega negatively. Before I could, they began talking about things like heats, suppressants... things I did not make sense to me because I could not understand the context of the conversation. It was far too difficult for a child my age to grasp at that point of time, and my parents did not help in making me do so.

These would have been covered in class a week later, but I took the initiative to search online.

The things I discovered, the articles I had read, came as a shock to me. None of them was positive or enlightening.

All I felt from that was despair, fear, dread and anger.

For the first time in my life, I felt scared.

I was unable to accept myself and the truth of what I was.

I cursed my own fate, wondering why I could not have been a Beta just like Riku.

And, as I had chosen to lie to myself, I had lied about my true secondary sex to other people. I did not want to end up like those Omegas I had read about online. Even dying would have been better than losing my status as a normal human being. But if I died, who would take care of Riku?

Riku is my only and most beloved younger brother. He had been plagued with illness since young, leaving him with a weak and frail body. Although he was in the hospital more often than he was at home, our bond was still strong. We were inseparable. It was because I had Riku that I chose to deny my fate as an Omega, and continued to strive to be a normal person.

When I started middle school, I began to devote myself to becoming 'normal'. Unlike other teenagers, I chose to spend my youth focusing on my studies and physical health, ensuring that I would not fall behind others.

However, the reminder that I was an Omega always haunted me like a vengeful spirit.

The school I had attended was a normal, public school. Most of the students were obviously Betas. There were a few known Alphas and Omegas in each cohort. Probably, there were also people like me who chose to lie. Because of the prevalence of Betas and a lack of understanding due to immaturity, stereotypes about each secondary sex were highly perpetuated. Omegas, whether they had their first heat or not, were often victims of bullying and teasing behind the teacher's backs.

I had few friends while I was in middle school. Riku's health had improved significantly by that time and he was able to attend classes when his condition was good, so I often spent my time with Riku. The other person I was close to was Miyazaki, my classmate who was on the library committee with me. We liked the same genres and titles, which sparked our first conversation.

Miyazaki was a mild-mannered person, soft-spoken and polite. He did not stand out much, but I felt like he was like any normal person. However, I did not realise that he was an Omega until his first heat came.

It came at an unfortunate time: during class, and physical education as well.

That day, I could not do anything at all. Frozen in place, I could only watch as the sequence of events passed.

I remember the pandemonium and flurry of activity that occurred around me when it happened. Alphas, not just from our class, had reacted strangely. They began to gather around him, trying to get their hands on him. Our teacher, and later a few others who were all Betas, were working swiftly to contain the situation. Miyazaki was brought to the infirmary to be administered the suppressant, where was locked up until the worst of his heat passes.

He was greatly embarrassed and ashamed by the incident. The bullying and teasing from the majority of the class that begun after that day made everything worst. Eventually, he stopped coming to school. I heard from our homeroom teacher later that his parents decided to move to Kyoto, in hopes that he could start life anew. I have not heard from him since.

However, I was greatly affected by this incident as well.

It then occurred to me that I, too, would have to experience something like that in the future. After all, heats are one of the trademarks of being an Omega.

I began to fear my first heat so much that I started to find ways to delay, or if possible stop it from occurring. There were many methods on the internet, but none of them seemed to be effective. I was about to give up when I found an unusual advertisement. It was by a professor from a nearby university who was developing a new drug that promises to reduce the effects of the heat and was recruiting volunteers to help to test its effectiveness on humans.

I felt compelled to learn more and sent an email to him with my concerns. The reply came the next day. He said that he could not promise that it would delay or prevent my heat from coming, despite the high possibility. I was more than willing to take the risk. However, because I was not of legal age, he was initially unwilling to take me in as a participant. Eventually, he relented, warning me not to speak of the matter to anyone as by using me to test the drug he was breaking a law. He also made me sign several forms related to this matter, including one that promised me monetary compensation for my participation.

I was initially worried about the side effects of the drug at first, but there seemed to be none. It seemed to work as I had intended to as well, as I had graduated middle school without my heat coming.

Throughout middle school, I held the top position of my cohort. My teachers had recommended me to attend an elite school due to my outstanding grades. However, I had chosen to decline as that would have meant being separated from Riku. I had been called foolish because of this, as it would mean refusing prospects for a better future. But to me, Riku was all that mattered.

Naturally, Riku was aware that I was an Omega. Only my family and teachers knew. However, unlike me, he did not seem to realise the implications of being and the dark fate that awaits any Omega individual.

Riku treated me like a normal person. He did not worry about me the suffocating way our parents did, nor did he say nasty things about Omegas despite hearing about them from his friends in school. He always treated me kindly and smiled at me so brightly. Like the sun, he illuminated my life and gave me hope.

I was still taking the drug throughout high school, and my first heat did not come. My parents begin to worry and suggested that I undergo a checkup to investigate why, but I convinced them that I was fine. It would have been bad if someone found out about the drug since I kept it a secret from them the entire time.

Little did I know that my reliance on the drug, believing that it was foolproof, would have led to my greatest downfall.

The summer of our third year of high school had been unusually hot. We had decided to spend it at home to complete our assignments for that vacation period.

At that time, I had already decided on what I wanted to do after graduation: I wanted to become a doctor, specifically a paediatrician.

It was extremely rare for an Omega to be accepted into any medical school in the country. Fortunately, my good grades and numerous achievements got me the help of my school's principal, who recommended me to a school run by his acquaintance. All I had to do was pass the exams and I would be accepted. I heard that the difficulty was higher than that of most institutes, but that did not deter me from wanting to achieve my goal. It only drove me to work harder instead.

However, I may have pushed myself too hard.

The lack of sleep and the torturing heat was a double-whammy to any student who was preparing for examinations. My parents were worried, always telling me to do things in moderation. I chose not heed their words and later on had to bear the consequences.

On that very day, my heat came unexpectedly.

It felt I was being set on fire, both to my skin and innards. I felt like I was going to lose all sense of myself, my mind only focusing on the swirling heat that burned in my torso and abdomen. I could not move or speak. It was a terrible feeling, far worse than what I have read on the internet.

I was able to regain my senses when I felt the pain of my head hitting the wooden floor. By that time, it was too late.

Riku was the one who had pushed me down. He was breathing heavily, but not due to any illness. He was being affected by my heat, despite being a Beta.

I tried calling out his name, over and over again. As he begun to tug at my clothes, pulling them off my body, I kept begging for him to stop, to become aware of what he was doing. My voice was unable to reach him and that made me worried, not just about what he would do to me, but how me being an Omega has affected my precious brother.

Not one to give up, I struggled, hoping he would gain some semblance of himself with some physical stimulation. However, my body could not muster enough strength to even push him away, and with me, on my back, I was open and vulnerable to him. In a rash move, I was able to hit him hard, delivering a punch into his cheek, but it was by pure accident. I never intended to hurt him.

However, it failed to stop him. Instead, it made him more violent.

Riku had never raised his hand against me before. I do not know if it was the sound that made when his palm was brought to my cheek or the searing pain that had shocked me. It left me stunned, unable to move. It made me give up trying to resist him but not because I knew that I was unable to overcome him physically.

It was because I had lost the will to.

At that moment, I felt that anything I did was futile. I felt helpless. I did not know what to do anymore. I lost hope. I just longed to be freed from the

Thus, I gave up.

That afternoon, my virginity was forcefully taken from me.

It hurt at first. It probably still hurt, later on, I just did not feel it. My senses became numb to the entire ordeal, and it was like I was watching it happen through a video camera.

It was all a bad dream, or so it was how it felt at that moment. The kind, sweet Riku I knew would not have done something like this. Riku, who was gentler than anyone I knew, would never hurt anyone. How do you expect me to believe that that child, who was unable to even harm a fly, would treat someone roughly? To do something like grabbing their hair and head to put them down? To have sunk in his fingers so hard into another person's skin that bruises would form? To continuously thrust himself into another without a single moment of concern for his partner, like a wild beast would?

Riku raped me.

Yet, Riku was not at the one at fault. He was not the one to blame, nor was he in the wrong.

I was.

I am the only one at fault.

If only I was not born an omega, Riku would not have been forced to hurt someone he cared about.

If only I had been more careful, I may not have hurt him.

Riku, forgive me. Please forgive your incompetent older brother for being a filthy Omega. For making you go through something so terrible. For making you experience something that would only leave a bitter memory. Forgive me for hurting you, whom I love so dearly. And, if you have it in your heart, forgive the disgusting me who had thought that it felt good and had actually enjoyed being violated by you.

I was not sure exactly how many times Riku came, releasing his hot sperm into me that day. I lost count around the time I had passed out.

When I opened my eyes, I was lying in hospital. My mother was next to me, and so was the doctor. I overheard them talking, but none of their words registered in my head. I lost consciousness again a minute or two later.

Later in the day, after I was fully conscious, the doctor came to tell me what had happened, and why I was where I was. She also told me that I had to stay in the hospital for at least two weeks. There were two reasons cited by the doctor: first was to allow my bruises to heal. Second, was to test if I had been impregnated. Even if a Beta's sperm was not as voluminous or potent as an Alpha's, the amount was likely enough to guarantee pregnancy.

I listened to her words with little heed, letting them in one ear and out the other. I felt like a lifeless doll: unable to feel anything, with no regard to the people around me.

That was the calm before the storm.

Within the first week of my stay at the hospital, I began to have nightmares. They plagued my sleep, not just every night, but whenever I closed my eyes. I began to fear sleep as well as having people around me, especially males. Even if it was my own parents, I would react violently to anyone who tried to come near me.

The only except was a middle-aged nurse who went by the name of Misumi. She was a plump Omega woman with a motherly aura, like a godmother of sorts. She was the only one who continuously tried to approach me despite my shrieks and violent reactions, which I could not control. The hug and pats on the back that she gave me when she succeeded were comforting, and I was finally able to let out all the pain and hurt that was tearing at me from inside in the form of tears.

However, that did not mean that I had recovered, both physically and mentally. I was still unable to have people I was not comfortable with touch or be too close to me without making me feel nauseous or scared. I still had nightmares, but I no longer had to be administered medication to make me fall asleep.

While the scars still remained in my heart, I was no doubt getting better. This was the fruit of the efforts put in by the people around me. Their heartfelt feelings got through to me, and I felt that I had to do something to return their kindness.

That is by getting better.

However, everyone was well aware that the worst is yet to come.

About a month after the incident, when my condition was deemed to be stable, the doctor came to me with the news that everyone wanted to hear.

"Calm down and listen carefully to what I am going to tell you, Nanase Tenn-kun."

From her tone, I already knew what she was going to say. However, it seemed that the Gods of fate enjoyed taking me by surprise, especially in the strangest of ways.

"Right now, at this very moment, there are two little lives growing inside of you."

**"Prologue - Tenn" end**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's only a few more hours left of 2017, so have a Happy New Year! Thank you for your continuous support, and I hope to bring more interesting and wonderful stories to you for the coming year as well!


	5. Chapter 2A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

The light pouring in from the uncovered windows was a sign that morning had come. I had to squint when I opened my eyes, blinking to let my eyes adapt to the brightness of the room.

Turning to face the other side of the bed, the sleeping face of my son came into sight.

Sorata… my dear, precious child.

To be able to have received his love and kindness was the greatest blessing that I, a failure of a parent, could ever receive. It was because of him that I had something to live for, despite having lost everything. Because of his smile, I could keep working hard each and every day. Because of him, I began to hold hope in my heart once more. Words alone could not express how grateful I was to have him by my side.

These mundane but peaceful days should not be taken for granted. That was what my youth had taught me. That is why I decided that I will protect both him and this happiness, the most precious things to me.

I checked the time on my smartphone to learn that I had woken up earlier than usual. I would go back to sleep since I had time to spare in the morning, but I just did not feel like doing that today. Perhaps it was because I saw an unusual dream: one of my past. I had not seen or thought about that in the longest while, so it felt strange to see it all of a sudden.

However, I knew precisely why I had that dream.

Riku... he was more than just my younger twin brother. He was once the most important person in my life. When I left home, I did not think that I would meet him again. Especially not at Sorata's kindergarten, of all places.

Takanashi Play House was a kindergarten that provides daycare and activities for children aged four to six. Children of each age group was allocated to one class. Two teachers were in charge of 30 students, which was different compared to other kindergartens. This was because there were teachers who are Omegas, and this arrangement would allow the plans for the class to continue per normal if the teacher was absent.

I was introduced to this school by the Tsunashi couple who lived nearby. They were the only people I could call friends, who have supported Sorata and I a lot.

The husband, Ryuunosuke, was a professional make-up artist and my colleague at work, where we first met. Despite being a big man, he was very gentle, like a kind older brother. His bonded mate and partner, Sougo-san, was an Omega male like me. He was not specific about his background, but he seemed to be from a well-to-do Alpha family who left home after refusing to follow the life plans his father had forced on him. As we had a lot in common, we got along quite well.

Together, the couple had two sons, named Sakuya and Haruto, and were expecting their third child in autumn.

Sakuya was almost a year older than Sorata, but they were in the same grade due to the school system. Ever since they met as toddlers, the two had been close friends, perhaps even inseparable. People have said that they would make a cute couple, which even I have to agree, but I would not be giving up my dear son to another so soon.

Aside from weekly playdates, Sorata would be cared for in the day by the Tsunashi family when I have my heats. However, because I would be busy with work, I would have to trouble Sougo-san to help pick him up from school until Misumi-san, my hired housekeeper, gets better.

Truth to be told, being busy was nothing but an excuse. Despite my workload, I could make time to pick up Sorata. I just wanted to avoid meeting Riku again.

It was not like I held anything against Riku, or that I hated him. I still love him dearly, and that has not changed since that day. I just felt that someone like me… after what happened that day and what I have now become, did not deserve to be around him.

Knowing Riku, he would do anything to meet me again, especially since I left home without a word. Who knows, he may have found a partner and his own happiness. Meeting me again would only ruin that completely since I would only hurt and make him sad. He does not need a failure like me by his side.

True, I was surprised that he chose to be a kindergarten teacher since he wanted to be a stage actor since we saw that musical during our early days of elementary school. But as long as he was happy and well, which I am sure he is, that is all that mattered.

"Mama…?"

All I have to do is to protect my own happiness, no matter how small it is.

"Good morning, sweetheart. Did you sleep well?"

"I dreamt of blueberries and pancakes… and the Sky Rangers…"

"That's good, then." I leant over to press a kiss to his forehead. "It's still early, and Mama's going to make breakfast soon. Do you want to go back to sleep or wake up?"

"Mm… sleep…"

"Mama will wake you up later, then."

Sorata made a small sound that seemed to be of agreement before falling back asleep, cuddling his favourite soft toy to his chest.

That cat plush toy had been the first gift I had bought for him from my own pocket when I received my first paycheck. That was around three and a half to four years ago when I had just joined Yaotome Productions as a model, and completed a few jobs for a magazine. Surprisingly, Sorata had never asked me for many things. When I want to spoil him with something, he would always say that being able to spend time with me was all he wanted. Because of this, he does not have a lot of toys, but a small few that he treasures. Part of me wonders if he took after me, as I myself had held back making selfish requests to my parents as a child. If so, I may have forced him to become mature at a too-young age. That was why I felt compelled to do everything I could for him.

As I got out of bed and moved around the apartment to wash up, change out of my pyjamas and prepare breakfast, I ran through a mental list of the ingredients we had left at home. Seeing that the bread would soon go stale, I decided to make french toast instead of our Saturday usual, which was pancakes.

I intended to wake Sorata up after I was done with the cooking and setting the table, but he woke up on his own just as I was done.

"Mama…?" He still seemed sleepy, rubbing his eyes and dragging his feet as he walked out of the bedroom. "Something smells good."

"Over here, dear. Are you still sleepy?"

"A bit."

He reached his arms out as he approached, his way of asking for a cuddle. I scooped him up into my arms, patting his back gently. Being an affectionate child, Sorata likes it when I touch him. Hugs, light touches, pats and snuggles seem to soothe him and make him feel comfortable. And now that he was more awake, he began to nuzzle his cheek against mine.

"Mama, I love you."

"I love you too, my dear Sora. Come, let's get your face washed so we can have breakfast."

I carried him to the washroom so that he can use the toilet. There was a stepping stool set for him in front of the sink, so he could wash his hands. I had to help him press a bit of soap into his small palms, and turn on the tap when he was done lathering. After that, I wet his face towel for him so that he could wipe his face.

"All represhed!"

"It's 'refreshed', my dear."

"Refreshed?"

"Yes, refreshed." It seems that he has some difficulty pronouncing some words, especially if they are long. However, he is improving with time, so I did not have to worry. "Now then, let's get you dressed so we can eat."

I would let Sorata choose his own clothes, not just to wear but even to buy at the store. He seemed to prefer clothes with long sleeves and pants, rather than T-shirts or shorts. Perhaps this was due to the fact that he did not like the cold.

Today, his choice was his favourite long-sleeved yellow Omurice T-shirt, which I have a short-sleeved version of, and denim overalls. I wonder if it was the influence of the movie Sougo-san brought him and Sakuya to watch last month since he had been choosing his only pair of dark blue overalls since that time.

Now that he was dressed, it was finally time for breakfast.

"Sorata, what must you say before you eat?"

"Let's eat!"

"That's right. Let's eat."

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I have more parts out on Tenn's side of the story, I'll release Sorata's bio which I'm still working on. His character notes have spoilers that I don't want to reveal too early.
> 
> Next part won't be up so fast due to work and some personal problems.


	6. Chapter 2B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought I would have been too depressed to write but in the end, I worked on it as per normal. I want a break to play games; I ended up stress-buying Tales of the World: Reve Unitia (which was on discount) despite not finishing Tales of the Abyss yet (Luke hasn't cut his hair so you can tell how little time I had to invest into that).
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"Thank you for tha meal!"

"Thank you for the meal."

We both finished our food and expressed our thanks. Aside from bitter foods, Sorata was not a picky eater and finished everything on his plate. Compared to other children, this was a good thing. However, it would be much better if I could finally get him to eat his green peppers.

"Was it good?"

"Yummy! Can Sorata have more?"

"It's not good to overeat. Your tummy will burst, like a bomb and it will hurt lots. You don't want that, do you?"

He shook his head quickly, with a mildly frightened look on his face. "Sorata doesn't like the ouchies."

"Then you would have to bear with it." I gave him a pat on his soft hair. "If it's really that yummy, then I'll make it for you again some other time."

"Promise?"

"I promise. We should be getting ready to go out soon. Uncle Sougo bringing you out to the amusement park with Sakuya-kun, right? You should hurry and pack your bag, if not you'll be late."

"Aye!" He chirped, climbing down from the chair.

I collected his dishes since he was still not tall enough to help with that, as well as mine own and quickly completed the washing up. When I was done, I went to check on him.

In his backpack, Sorata now had a clean handkerchief, jacket and tissues. There was a tag attached to his bag with my contact details, in case anything was to happen to him. He still needed his raincoat, baby wipes, a change of clothes and some plastic bags.

"Can Sorata bring Mr Cat along?" He asked, cuddling his plush toy. "Mr Cat will be lonely at home alone."

"As long as you promise not to lose him."

"Sorata won't lose him! Thank you, Mama!"

After packing, we brushed our teeth. Well, I had to help Sorata brush his, as he was still not ready to do it on own. All that was left was to sling his water bottle around his shoulder before carrying the backpack and he would be ready to leave.

As for me, I had an important engagement and had packed my own bag the night before. I had also packed a sleepover bag for him as he would be staying with the Tsunashi family tonight. It was a pity that I could not spend time with him despite it being a weekend, but I could not postpone or turn down a directive from that man.

Sorata was able to put on his own shoes… at least, fasten the velcro straps of his favourite red sneakers. Mine were slip-on loafers, so I was ready before he was. Balancing my bag on one shoulder and his sleepover bag on the other, I opened the door of the apartment.

"Sorata, are you ready?"

"Almost!" He fastened the last strap before standing up straight. "Let's go!"

After locking the door, I slipped on my sunglasses, used to conceal my identity, and reached down for his hand. He took it with glee, walking beside me.

We took the elevator to the ground floor. The building of the apartment that was provided for us was deemed to be of a high class and seemed to house many important people. Because of this, there was a security guard stationed at the entrance, something you would not find at ordinary apartments.

The Tsunashi family home was in the next town, where the kindergarten was also located. It was a simple, ordinary two-story house in an ordinary housing estate. It was a fifteen-minute walk to the house, and it would take an additional five minutes to the kindergarten.

As the weather was good and it was still early in the morning, we took our time to walk over.

Sorata was humming a song, which I recognised as the opening theme of his favourite Sunday morning show, the Sky Rangers. Today, there was live action show for that series at a nearby amusement park. Hearing about this, I had asked Sougo-san to bring him there since I already had prior engagements. Sorata had heard about this from Sakuya and told me about it. However, he did not ask me to bring him there. I was aware that he had really wanted to go but had refrained from making a selfish request as he knew I was busy.

"Mama, we're almost there!" Sorata would exclaim every time we were about a minute or two away from the house. "Sakuya-kun's waiting!"

"Don't run, Sorata. We'll be there soon."

This behaviour was so consistent that it was amazing. Even if there was no plan to meet, it seemed that Sorata was able to sense his friend's presence when he was nearby. According to Sougo-san, this was the same for Sakuya. Because of this, they had many coincidental meetings out of school and playdates.

"We're here!"

"Yes yes, we are. Do you want to ring the doorbell?"

"Yes!"

"Then up we go." I supported him from the underarms and lifted him up. "Go on."

Sorata stuck out his index finger to press the button, after which we could hear the distinct ding-dong sound.

"Who is there?" Sougo-san's voice came over the intercom.

"Uncle Sou! It's Sorata! And Mama!"

"Oh! I'll open the gate for you right away!"

I put Sorata down and we waited at the gate. Sougo-san appeared from the front door, along with his two children. Soon-three year old Haruto was carried in his mother's arms, while Sakuya ran towards the gates.

"Sorata-kun!"

"Sakuya-kun!"

It had been less than a day since they last met, yet they were acting like they had not seen each other in months. The moment Sougo-san opened the gates, they hugged each other in their usual greeting.

Sougo-san and I exchanged greetings as well. "Good morning, Sougo-san."

"Good morning, Tenn-kun."

Of course, my son was not one to forget his manners, despite having gotten carried away. "Good morning, Uncle Sou."

"Good morning, Sorata-kun."

"Moormin!"

"Look, Haruto's saying good morning to you too, Sorata-kun."

"Good morning, Haru-chan!" Sorata chuckled, reaching up to touch the younger child's face after Sougo-san had bent down to let the toddler see him. "Haru-chan's so cute!"

I could not help but notice that Sakuya seemed to be a little jealous of this.

"Sakuya, have you said your greetings properly?"

"… Good morning, Uncle Tenn."

He seemed to be paying attention to what was happening with Sorata than with greeting me, but I had to acknowledge the effort he made. "Good morning to you too, Sakuya-kun. Where's your father?"

"You called?" Around that time, Ryuu appeared in the doorway. "Good morning, Tenn. You're earlier than I expected. I'm still having breakfast."

"You can take your time. I need to put down Sorata's things first."

"Got it."

"Good morning, Uncle Ryuu!"

"Good morning, Sorata-kun. Make sure you have lots of fun today, okay? Take care of Sakuya for me."

"Aye!"

"Dad! That's wrong! I'll be the one to take care of Sorata! I promised that I'll protect him, after all!"

"I see I see! That's my boy."

"Ryuu-san, you should hurry and finish breakfast, lest you'd be late."

"Oh! Right!"

As we waited for Ryuu to get ready, I brought Sorata's overnight bag to Sakuya's room and briefed Sougo-san of what I had included in that and his backpack, of what he would need and what was there just in case. After that, Sougo-san had to help his two children prepare for the outing, and I watched over Sakuya since Haruto needed more of his attention.

We were more than ready by the time Ryuu was.

The house was locked up, and everyone made their way to the public parking lot at the end of the lane. Ryuu, the only one who had a licence, sat in the driver's seat. Usually, Sougo-san would be the one next to him, but because Ryuu's job today was with me I sat in the front instead. Sougo-san sat behind me, carrying little Haruto, leaving Sorata and Sakuya to occupy the last of the seats.

Ryuu always had music on when he drives, although I did not pay too much attention to the song that was playing. I was more focused on Sorata, who was trying to make a conversation with Sakuya. I heard something about pancakes, which caught my attention.

It seems that Sorata thinks of Riku fondly after what happened yesterday... even coming up with a nickname for him: "Pancakes-sensei". Well, that child has always been quick to warm up to others who show him kindness. However, I had mixed feelings about this matter.

I have never once talked to Sorata about the matter of his father. When he brought up the topic I avoided it. Being a sensitive child, he must have been considerate of my feelings and chose to stop asking about it as well. I did intend to tell Sorata about the matter of his parentage, but only when he was older. I knew that I could not keep this matter hidden from him forever, nor could I have hidden from Riku and my family for that long. However, in truth, I was afraid of how Sorata would react if he knew the truth.

I was afraid that he would come to hate me, for putting him through so much at such a young age. For depriving him of a 'normal' childhood. For hiding the truth from him.

Ryuu always tells me that I think and worry too much but I could not help it.

I was quiet during the drive to the amusement park, and that must have caught his attention. After we dropped Sougo-san and the children off and were back on the road, he asked about it the way he usually would.

"Is something the matter?"

"… I met my younger brother yesterday."

"Oh." He sounded and looked surprised; a fairly normal reaction. "Where?"

"The kindergarten. I went to pick Sorata up since Misumi-san sprained her back, and he was the one who stayed back to look after him."

"He's a teacher there?"

"Supposedly. Sorata addressed him as a 'sensei', so it seems that he is."

"Did he know that it was you, or that Sorata-kun is…" He did not finish his sentence. Instead, he had left it hanging.

"I was wearing my usual disguise, but it seemed that he could tell it was me. Probably by scent, since we grew up with one another it should have been familiar to him. However, it seems that he doesn't know anything about Sorata."

"I see… Do you intend to tell him?"

"Who?"

"Sorata-kun."

"No, I don't."

"… I see."

Ryuu knew of the reasons behind my insecurity. He was a close friend, after all, who kindly and patiently served as a listening ear. He also knew why I refused to tell Sorata anything, and even though he had stated his opinion on the matter once he did not repeat himself a second time out of respect for my decision. I am more than grateful to have a friend like him.

"Ah, but today's job is one of 'those' sessions, isn't it? Would you be fine? I mean, after things like that happening…"

"Who are you talking to, Ryuu?" I folded my arms across my chest. "No matter what it may be, regardless how I feel, I will accomplish all tasks that I am given perfectly. That is what it means to be Kujou Tenn… Kujou Takamasa's obedient doll."

I was definitely not as confident as I try to sound, but I have to be.

At this point in time, it does not matter how low I have to stoop, or how badly I would be humiliated or how filthy I would and have become.

Back then, as a lone Omega, I had no other choice to do so if I wished to have the power and ability to protect the things and people who were important to me. Even if things were much better than it was in the past, my beliefs have not changed.

However, it has nothing to do with the responsibility of a parent or repaying the debt I have to Kujou-san.

This is all for one reason: Sorata.

Sorata gave me a second chance and a reason to live. When he first smiled at me, a person who was impure and dirty, I was able to believe in hope again. His hand, then so little, curled around the finger of my stained hand as if he was saying he accepted me. Despite being a person who lost so much and no longer deserved kindness, he gave me so much more than I could ever ask for. And despite the fact that my carelessness nearly cost him his life, he still chose me to be his parent.

As long as he still needs me and calls me his mother, I will continue doing my best to protect and shower him with love.

Until the day he is finally able to stand on his own two feet, I will be there for him.

Always.

_"Chapter 2" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starting a Q&A corner! You may drop your questions here (about this series, and other fics maybe) here at [my Q & A box](https://peing.net/amamiya_toki)! I'll post the answers on Twitter, but will compile those related to the series here!


	7. Chapter 3A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With my fighting quite hard for this round's in-game event (because 20% EXP bonus badge) I didn't think I had the time to write until it was over. Proved myself wrong by finishing this part in an hour and a half, but then again I already had it scripted in my head before I started writing.
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

"Sorry to have made you accompany me for a personal matter on your off day, Nanase-san."

"It's fine, I should be thanking you for inviting me instead. I really enjoyed the show!"

It was a Saturday and the amusement park was packed.

I was invited by my colleague, Izumi Iori to accompany his six-year-old niece to watch a collaborated live show between two television programmes. One was the Sky Rangers, which I am secretly a fan of, and Magical Kokona which was what his niece was interested in.

Rokuya Manami-chan, who was one of our students at our kindergarten, was supposed to come with her father who loves the show just as much as she does. However, he had an urgent business meeting to attend in another part of the country and was currently out of the city. Her mother, Iori's older brother Mitsuki, was busy with the family business.

In the first place, Iori was the one who won the tickets, so he volunteered to bring her out today. He also invited me because he had one extra ticket which he did not want to go to waste.

I met Iori when I was in college. His family owned a patisserie and cafe near campus, so I often went there for coffee and to study. He was also my junior after he enrolled in the same course and school. He is probably the closest person I could call a friend, but because he tends to be too formal I sometimes feel that we are not close at all.

There were many children present during the live show we watched earlier, and many of them came with their parents. We had planned to catch the afternoon session but ended up watching the late morning one because we reached the park too early.

It was just about time for lunch, so we were discussing what we should eat.

"Uncle Iori! Nana-sensei!" Manami-chan, who was holding Iori's hand, called out to us as we were talking. "Look! Kokona!"

She was pointing to a booth that had many items of the series on display. We were not too far from the amphitheatre where the show was held, and there was a sign that said something about an exclusive-sale. There was a Sky Rangers booth too, and both were packed with excited children begging their parents to buy something for them.

"Do you want to take a look?" Iori asked.

"Yeah! I want to get something for Daddy! Come! Let's go!"

"Don't pull, Manami. Be patient." He gave her a stern warning before turning back to me. "What about you, Nanase-san?"

"I'm good. I'll just wait over there."

"Please call me if anything happens."

"Got it."

I retreated a small distance away, where it was more peaceful and took a seat on a nearby bench.

It really has been a while since I came to an amusement park. The last time I did was probably in elementary school when I made a selfish request to my parents for my birthday. We had lots of fun, and although I cannot remember most of it, it was one of the most memorable times in my life. At that time, everyone was careful about my condition, especially Tenn-nii who held my hand almost the entire time except for the time he got lost.

At that time, I did not realise that I had dropped something. Tenn-nii did and went to pick it up. However, we had left him behind and it took us a while to find out. When we did find him, he looked like he was holding back his tears.

Tenn-nii was never one to cry out loud no matter how sad or scared he was, after all. The one who was always crying and needed comforting was me.

Ironically, I have not cried ever since the day he left home... until yesterday.

What should I say to him, if I were to meet him again?

Tenn-nii is as stubborn as I am. Surely if I tried to apologise for that day, he would not forgive me. Or, perhaps he had forgotten about it already.

I mean, that child... Sorata called him 'Mama', and he had a different family name. He must have found someone he loved… this person named Kujou, but maybe for some reason they were not able to live together. That is how it usually is in television dramas, right? But Sorata seems like a happy kid... that means that Tenn-nii must be living happily, too.

I thought I would be relieved knowing that, but the thought put a sour taste in my mouth.

For a moment, I thought I imagined Sorata's scent just by thinking about him. It was not as rich or distinct as Tenn-nii's. It was similar in sweetness, just milder and more fragrant, like fresh jasmine flowers.

However, when I caught sight of a head of dark pink hair, I had to do a double-take. It was not my imagination that the child in the distance was indeed Sorata.

Why was he here?

No, actually, why was he alone?

I shot up from my seat on instinct, my legs moving towards him without me willing them to.

However, before I could get too close to him, he bumped into someone. That someone—a young man with silver hair who can only be described as handsome—bent down when he noticed him. "Yo kid, you okay? Are you lost? Where's your mom?"

I did not know why, but I stopped and hid. However, I watched carefully from afar, just in case anything were to happen to him.

"Ma-Mama isn't here with Sorata today..."

Poor Sorata... he looked so scared and was literally holding his tears back. Was he forcing himself to be brave?

"Hah? Then who did you come with?" I do not know who this person is, but for some reason, the way he speaks just comes off as plain rude.

"Uncle Sou... and Sakuya-kun and Haru-chan... Does Uncle know where they are?"

"No, I don't. And who are you calling an uncle?"

Sorata seemed frightened by the way he raised his voice. Even if it was just by a little, it would be frightening to a child who is already about to cry... and he did!

"Oi oi, don't cry. People are giving weird looks."

"I'm sowwy... Sorata is sowwy..."

At this point in time, he was crying so hard that he could not speak properly. He buried his face in the soft toy he carried, sniffling and sobbing.

I cannot bear to watch this any longer.

"Sorata!" I called out his name as I ran towards him.

He looked up at the sound of my voice. The momentary relief was visible on his face as he began to run towards me. I bent down, taking him into my arms. He buried his face in my chest, still sobbing, the poor thing.

"Oi, you!"

Eh?

"Me?"

"Who else? How could you let your kid get lost like that? Why weren't you watching him properly?"

Wait. Why was I being scolded?

"Y-You got it wrong! I'm not his parent!"

"Hah? What kind of idiot will believe a blatant lie like that? You need a good look in the mirror; the resemblance is so uncanny that it would be stranger if you weren't related!"

The man left in a huff after that and I was left alone to comfort Sorata. I held him tight against me, patting his head gently as Tenn-nii used to do for me. "Hush, Sorata, it's alright now. Sensei's got you. You've been a good and brave boy, haven't you?"

His voice was soft, but I could hear him calling me between sniffles.

"Sensei... Pancakes-sensei..."

Pa... Pancakes-sensei?

Is that honestly what he thinks of me as?

"Ah, there you are. Didn't I tell you to call me?"

I heard Iori scold me, and I turned to him to offer a sheepish grin of apology.

"Uncle Iori was worried, you know!"

"W-Who was?"

"I'm sorry; I just acted without thinking..."

"Hm?" Iori stared at Sorata, who still had his face buried in my shirt. "This child... he seems awfully familiar."

Manami-chan seemed to recognise him. "Oh! It's Sora-kun!"

"Sora-kun... as in Kujou Sorata-kun?" Iori looked surprised. "What happened to him?"

"Io-sensei...?" When his name was called, Sorata looked up to glance towards Iori. "Mana-chan...?"

"Sora-kun! You came to see Kokona too?"

"No, the Sky Rangers..."

"Sorata...kun here got separated from his guardian. A person he called Uncle Sou, it seems."

"Ah. He must be referring to Tsunashi Sougo, the mother of his classmate. Their families are quite close, I heard. I have his number on my cellphone, so I will call him right away. In the meantime, let's find Sorata-kun a place to rest and get him a drink. He must be dehydrated from the crying."

As expected of Iori, he is always calm and has a good head on his shoulders.

Even though he is a year younger than me!

"R-Right!"

**\- to be continued -**


	8. Chapter 3B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, it's past midnight. It's been a while since I did a night-time upload. I hope I didn't miss out any typos.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

The four of us found a place to rest on a bench near the merry-go-round, where there was a vending machine next to it. Iori needed to inform Sorata's guardian that he was with us, so I was put in charge of getting our drinks.

"Sorata-kun, is apple juice okay with you?"

"Un." He nodded, cuddling his plush toy tight to his chest.

"I want orange!" Manami-chan chirped right after Sorata gave his answer, not even bothering to wait for me to ask her.

Despite being in the same cohort, she was significantly taller than Sorata, by at least half a head. Her long blonde hair was tied up in two pigtails, one at each side of her head. Today, she was wearing a pink dress to match her favourite character.

"Sure. Just wait a little…"

I popped the coins into the machine, selecting the drinks I wanted. I got one each for myself and Iori before pushing down on the lever for my change. I handed the children their drinks after opening the can for them, which they accepted with thanks.

Manami-chan gulped down hers eagerly, while Sorata took slow and small sips. His eyes were still red from the crying, the poor thing. I could not keep myself from patting his head gently.

It occurred to me earlier, but his hair was soft and felt kind of fluffy, which was really nice to the touch.

"Sensei?" He glanced up at me, unsure of the meaning behind my gesture.

"You're really brave, aren't you? You were trying so hard not to cry."

"Because, if Sorata cries, it will cause trouble for people. Sorata wants to be a good boy, so Sorata won't cause trouble or cry."

That reasoning… he really is just like Tenn-nii.

"Nanase-san."

"Ah! Iori! You're done with the call?"

"Yeah. Tsunashi-san was on his way to the information centre but is now coming here. It will take a while because he would be walking from the other end of the park."

"I see… oh! I got you a drink. Coffee, right?"

"Yes, thank you…" For some reason, his face scrunched up when I passed him the can. "Nanase-san, this is cafe au lait. I wanted black coffee."

"You just said coffee, though!"

"Well, the mistake was already made, so I'll just let it slide this time."

"Nana-sensei, I've finished!" Manami-chan declared proudly, standing up and raising the can high in the air.

"Do you know where to dispose of the empty can?"

"There?" She pointed to the trash bin for non-combustible waste.

"Nope, that's not it. Why don't you try a different one?"

"Mmmm... this one!" This time, she pointed to the recycling bin next to the vending machine.

"That's right! Well done! You can put it in now."

"Yay! Can we go on the merry-go-round after this? Please?"

I looked towards Iori, who replied quickly.

"It should be no problem. I'll accompany you." It seems that he finished his coffee at that time. He stood up, threw the can away and took Manami-chan's hand. "I'll leave Sorata-kun and our belongings to you, Nanase-san."

"Leave him to me!"

I waved at the two who left us and turned my attention back to Sorata. He was still sipping on the can of juice slowly.

The words that that man said earlier was still stuck in my head.

Does he really look like me?

No matter how I look at it, he looks and behaves more like Tenn-nii.

Then again, we do have the same parents, so maybe it is because of that blood relation that he thinks that way?

"Sensei, Sorata is done." In a manner that was similar to Manami-chan's, Sorata lifted up the can to show me that he had finished his drink.

"Are you still thirsty? Do you need one more drink?"

He shook his head. "Sorata is fine."

"I see. I finished mine as well, so shall we throw the empty cans away?"

We did just that and sat back down to wait, either for Iori to return or his guardian to appear.

Sorata was still holding his plush toy, but he was sitting close to me. I thought he would keep his distance since we were probably not that close as of yet, but I was glad to see that he was comfortable around me.

"Say, Sorata, can I ask something?" He turned to me with a slightly confused expression but nodded yes to my question. "How did you get separated from your guardian... er, Uncle Sou?"

"After watching the Sky Rangers, Haru-chan and Sakuya-kun needed to go wee-wee. But Sorata forgot Mr Cat so Sorata went to take him. But when Sorata turned around, Sakuya-kun and the rest disappeared..."

"I see..."

"Mr Cat was a present from Mama. And Mr Cat is a lot like Mama. Mama always gets lonely when Mama is alone, so Mr Cat does too. That's why Sorata went back to take Mr Cat so that he won't be alone."

"Oh…"

So to Sorata, Tenn-nii appears lonely when he is by himself… that had not changed at all, huh.

But, why? Tenn-nii found his happiness, did he not? So, why does it sound like he is still suffering? His suffering should have ended once he left home… I mean, since he was no longer dragged down by me, who was a burden in his life…

"Pancakes-sensei? Are you okay? Sensei is making a sad face…"

"I just thought of someone who I know that sounds just like your Mama, that's all."

"Are they important to Sensei?"

"Important… I guess he is. He has always been the most important person to me."

"Like how Mama is most important to Sorata?"

"Maybe it's a little different? I mean, I'm not sure what they think of me now, but I guess you could say that he will still be important to me, no matter what."

"Oh." I am not sure if he understood what I had told him, but it seemed like he did.

"Sorata-kun!"

From a distance, I could hear people calling for him. One was the voice of an adult and the other of a child. Sorata recognised them and hopped on his feet, calling out to them in a voice that was unexpectedly loud for a soft-spoken child.

"Sakuya-kun! Uncle Sou!"

"Sorata-kun!" I could only watch in awe as a brown haired-boy dashed to him and hugged him tightly. He was crying, probably from relief. "I was worried! Silly Sorata-kun! Why did you disappear?"

"Sorata is sorry… Sakuya-kun, don't cry?"

"I'm not crying!" Is what he said but he definitely was and had snot dripping from his nose.

The white-haired man behind him… the person named Tsunashi Sougo I presumed, bent down to separate the children so he could wipe Sakuya-kun's face and get him to blow his nose.

If I had not learnt of his name before I met him, I may have mistaken him for a woman. He was no doubt what people would call a beautiful person, although he was nowhere as beautiful as Tenn-nii. He was close enough that I could catch his scent: it was light and pleasant, like lavender, unmistakably that of an Omega's. However, there was also a strong saltish smell… like that of the sea, probably his bonded Alpha's mixed with it.

He must have felt me staring at him, and turned towards me to acknowledge my presence. However, I could not understand the confusion on his face when he saw me.

"My apologies for not introducing myself. You must be Nanase-sensei. My name is Tsunashi Sougo. You may refer to me just by name. This rascal is my eldest, Sakuya and the little one is my second child, Haruto. Pleased to meet your acquaintance. Izumi-sensei called me earlier to inform that you had found Sorata-kun and was looking after him."

"Ah!" He was so formal and polite that I was surprised. "Nanase Riku. The pleasure's all mine."

"Mom, who's this uncle? He looks a lot like Sorata-kun."

"Sakuya, don't be rude! He's a teacher at your school; you have to address him properly!"

"Sakuya-kun, this is Pancakes-sensei! Sorata told you about him earlier!"

"Riku-sensei!" I quickly corrected him, hoping that the odd nickname would not be passed around.

"Say, Sensei, why do you look so much like Sorata-kun?"

That was a question I did not have the answer to. Did he really look that much like me? If so, why?

Both Sakuya-kun and Sorata are looking at me as if they expect me to know everything. But I do not. Sorata does not know that I am related to Tenn-nii, and it did not feel right for me to tell him when Tenn-nii did not.

What should I say, in this situation?

"The… The truth is…"

"We're back!" Manami-chan's usual cheer interrupted me, and everyone's attention was turned to her. "Ah! Saku-kun is also here! Hello!"

"Oh. It's just Mana."

"Hey! What do you mean by that? Why do you always have to be such a meanie to me? Saku-kun is a dummy!"

"Ugly Mana!"

"Sakuya!"

"Sakuya-kun, Manami-chan, stop fighting…"

This was something that was not new to me. Even in my class, there were children who had the tendency to argue with each other every time they met. There were also some who, like Sorata, tried to stop them but his voice did not seem to reach them.

"That's about enough. Quit it, you two."

"B-But, Iori-sensei!"

"Saku-kun started it first!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Did not!"

"That's enough from you, Sakuya!" Sougo-san was the one who managed to stop the quarrel. "How many times have I told you not to be rude to other people, especially your friends? Apologise to Manami-chan."

"B-But mom…"

"Apologise." The expression on his face suddenly grew so frightening that it resembled that of a demon's. "Now."

Forget the children, even I felt scared by it.

"Manami," Iori broke the silence by intervening as well. "You were also at fault for shouting at Sakuya-kun. Could you apologise to him?"

As with most children, Manami-chan did not look happy being reprimanded, but she still turned to him. "... I'm sorry for shouting and calling you a dummy."

"... Yeah. I'm sorry too."

I caught the small, gentle smile on Sorata's face as he watched his friends make up with a handshake.

"That's great, isn't it, Sorata-kun?"

"Un!" He nodded with joy.

"Izumi-sensei and Nanase-sensei, I deeply apologise for my son's rudeness."

"Please raise your head, Tsunashi-san. It's something that always happens between children, and it's normal for them. We're used to it by now."

"Even so..."

"Sora-kun, let's go play!"

"Hey! No fair! Sorata-kun is my friend!"

"He's mine, too!"

The children have already recovered from the incident and were now talking about going on the rides.

"Ah!" A thought just occurred to me just at that moment. "Let's take a group picture together!"

"That came out of nowhere." As expected of Iori; he just had to make a comment about it. "What brought that up?"

"I mean, it's nice how we all get to meet up like this on an off day, right? Coincidences like this don't happen every day, so I was thinking that we should take a picture to commemorate. Plus, Manami-chan will have something to show Mitsuki when she goes home tonight."

"That isn't a bad idea." Sougo-san seemed to agree with me. "We could get a member of the staff to help us. I'll go over to ask."

While Sougo-san temporarily left us, I bent down to speak to the children. "Is there anything that you guys want to ride on? We can all go together after lunch!"

"I wanna ride the teacups!" Manami-chan declared, and Sakuya-kun followed in agreement.

"What about you, Sorata-kun? Do you want to ride the teacups?"

Sorata nodded in reply to my question, looking quite eager.

"Sora-kun's riding with me, right?"

"No, me!"

"Hmm... why don't we let Sorata-kun decide?"

All eyes were on him, which made him a little uncomfortable. However, he seemed to have made his choice, and I did not expect it to be me.

"Sorata... wants to ride with Pancakes-sensei."

"Ehhhh?!"

Me?

"Then I'm riding with Nana-sensei too!"

"Me too!"

"Good for you, Nanase-san. You have become popular."

"Iori, your sarcasm is bleeding through. Are you perhaps jealous?"

"Who would be?"

After that, Sougo-san returned with a staff member who helped us take the photographs with our smartphones. We ended up spending the entire afternoon together and ended up taking a lot more photographs.

Sougo-san, his children and Sorata-kun left us around sunset when his husband returned to pick them up. I stuck with Iori and Manami-chan for dinner. We had a simple meal at an eatery located around the station near the theme park before we returned home.

When I reached home, I took a bath and went straight to bed. It had been a while since I had this much excitement on a weekend. However, I could not fall asleep.

For most of the time at the park, Sorata stuck to me a lot, for some reason. I did not know why, but he seemed to feel at peace with me by his side. I have to admit that that was kind of adorable but at the same time, it was a bit heart-wrenching for me. Being with him made me think of Tenn-nii, and what I should consider doing.

Maybe I should try to talk to him. I mean, we left things on such an awkward note and never got the chance to do anything about it because we were probably avoiding each other. At the very least, even if we cannot return to how we used to be, we could still patch things up. If that can be done, then we can then figure out how to let things proceed on from there.

Iori should have his number, so all I have to do is get it and muster the courage to call him.

I know that is easier said than done; to be honest I am still scared to speak to him. I was afraid to learn if he still hates me, which he probably does. I would not be surprised if he may not even give me a chance to speak to him.

But I know it is not like me to brood on things like this.

If I do not do something, nothing will happen or change. That is why I just have to try.

And hope that everything goes well.

_"Chapter 3" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Character Profile: Sorata**
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Name: Kujou Sorata (九条 空田)  
> Age: 5  
> Birthdate: 7th March 2016 (assuming that Tenn was born on 9th July 1997 and that the Idolish7 timeline is in 2015)  
> Eye colour: Ruby red  
> Hair colour: Dark pink  
> Height: 94 cm  
> Weight: about 12.9 kg
> 
> Notes:
> 
>   * Is often picked on as he is smaller than most children his age, due to being one of the youngest few in the class cohort and because he was born premature. 
>   * Many adults consider him to be a very beautiful child and was even scouted to be a child model by several agencies, but he had no interest and refused all offers. 
>   * Did not have a crawling phase. He rolled to get around before learning how to walk. He also used to roll out of his own bed too often as a toddler, which led him to share the same bed as Tenn until he started elementary school. 
>   * In the future, his secondary-sex results would find him to be an Omega. 
>   * His best friends are Tsunashi Sakuya and Rokuya Minami (both Alphas). The trio would be in the same school since they were in kindergarten, all the way to high school. 
>   * Sakuya is his fated mate, and this connection had been consistently exhibited through their behaviour. 
>   * Many say that he resembles Riku as a child, but after puberty, his appearance becomes closer to Tenn's. 
>   * Gives nicknames to the people he likes. 
>   * Tenn, his mother, is the most important person in his life and he loves him dearly. His dream as a child was to become a hero who would protect his mother from anyone or anything which would hurt him. 
>   * Favourite food is pancakes and most kinds of fruits (especially berries, as they are easy to eat), while his least favourite is bitter foods. His dislike of green peppers continued into adulthood, but he eats everything else he is fed. However, he seems to have a small appetite and would get sick if he eats too much at one go. 
>   * Loves cuddles and warm sunny days. Dislikes the cold and rainy days to the point of hating them. Because of the latter, he prefers clothes with long sleeves and pants over shorts. 
>   * Has a fear of insects, especially cockroaches. As a child, he would cry uncontrollably when he sees one and would run away from it. 
>   * The affectionate and touchy-feely kind of kid. He tends to touch people on their highs, arms or cheeks. He believes that it makes them feel calm and comfortable, as Tenn does it to him and later vice versa. 
>   * Mostly takes after Tenn in personality and has a stubborn streak like both his parents. 
>   * If left alone, he would spend his time either reading, napping or playing with soft toys. 
>   * His first word was "Mama". 
>   * Spends his Sunday mornings watching tokusatsu and hero shows. 
>   * Generally healthy, but tends to catch bad colds in the colder seasons. 
>   * He became scared of Kujou after watching an animated television series where the evil demon king looked just like him. Kujou, who is secretly has a very soft spot for the child and treats him like a grandchild, often gets his heart broken by him. He continuously spoils him with sweets and treats, which Tenn had to put a stop to. 
>   * Is easily bribed with food. Because of this, it would be dangerous to leave him alone without adult supervision as he may end up getting kidnapped, which happened once. The case was swiftly resolved due to Kujou's intervention. 
> 



	9. Intermission 1 : "Brand new day"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Learning that he was pregnant with twins, Tenn makes his resolve to protect them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that I'm editing and posting this, I suddenly feel that this should have been released later. Then again I already built up chapter 2B with the intention of posting this soon, so here it is!
> 
> Intermissions are side stories that add more info to the main story (which are titled chapters) so I'll just be adding them as and when appropriate.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"Right now, at this very moment, there are two little lives growing inside of you."

The doctor's words repeated in my head in an endless loop. It prevented me from paying attention to anything else, and soon it became the only thing on my mind.

Two children.

Twins.

Riku... and mine.

Pregnant.

I am now pregnant.

Riku impregnated me.

I am bearing his children.

Two tiny and unborn children.

They are still developing, growing inside of me.

My thoughts were in an array, but the realisation did strike me. However, I neither surprised nor shocked, as if I had already known that this was going to happen.

However, what was more shocking about this news was what the doctor had said after that. She started talking about how this would affect my future, and of many difficult things that were from an adult's point of view. She may have just been stating facts, simple pros and cons, but in my skewed perspective, it felt like she was suggesting that I undergo an abortion. However, the choice was still mine.

To my despair, my parents seemed to be supportive of that notion as well.

"You have such a wonderful and bright path ahead of you." Was what my mother had told me. "You're still young and you have so much potential. It would be... such a waste, to let all of that go. Tenn, listen to me. This is for your sake and the future that you wished for. This... tragedy, these unfortunate events. These weren't meant to be part of your life. It was just an ill-fated accident. Right now, it's not too late. You can start your life proper again. You didn't want something like this to ruin your life, right?"

My mother was beating around the bush, but the true meaning of her words was as plain as day.

_"Abort the children."_

I knew my mother wanted the best for me.

However, those words she had uttered entered into the cracks of my still-healing heart as seeds of betrayal and took root.

There were other reasons that she could have used to convince me. Like how we would not be able to feed two more mouths with Riku's expensive medical bills. Or, how it would be difficult to raise two children while studying. Or maybe even the risks involved.

However, no matter what the reason or excuse, I would not listen to them.

My instincts screamed at me to protect them. No matter what sins I had committed, these children are pure and innocent. I cannot let them bear the consequences of everything I had done. I will not let anything or anyone harm them. Ever.

I was given time to think about the matter. It was an important decision to make, and I was definitely not expected to give my answer immediately. However, my heart already decided for me.

Less than two months after I had been admitted, my mental condition was deemed stable and I was allowed to go home.

I was initially afraid of meeting Riku again. He did not visit me in the hospital, nor did I hear anything about him. Since the day I had returned home, he had been avoiding me and did not show his face to me at all. From this, I concluded that he must have chosen to have nothing to do with me anymore. I do not blame him for that; I am sure that anyone would have suffered the same shock as he did would choose to do the same. I took it as a sign of rejection but had no choice but to respect his decision to do so. In turn, I remained cooped up in my room, so that he would not have to see me ever again.

However, there was a more important matter at hand.

My parents wanted the children inside of me gone. I wanted to protect them. As for Riku… I do not know if he was told anything about them. But seeing how he rejected me, he must have rejected them as well.

Hence, if I want to ensure their safety, I would have to do it alone. No matter how difficult or dangerous it may be.

I had a small sum of money saved up. It was the monetary compensation I had received for my participation in drug-testing; I had saved it up and not used a single yen. This would be enough to get me by… for food and water, at least. I also had to prepare for the cold season, seeing how winter was approaching, so I needed to take a lot of warm clothes with me.

A solid plan was probably the only thing I did not have the day I left home that morning, without saying goodbye.

My family lived in the suburbs of Tokyo, which was separated from the 23 wards. It was a small neighbourhood where people knew one another, so I had to get far enough where no one would recognise me. It would be awkward getting asked questions that I do not want to answer. That was one of the reasons why I left before sunrise, reaching the bus stop far from the shopping district or train station to take a bus to the big city.

I had been to the metropolitan area before, but this was my first time going on my own. It was still early on when I set foot in that particular district, but soon the streets were filled with people commuting to work. I immediately set out to find a place to work, which in turn may help me find a place to stay. The money I have is not going to last forever, so I had to find a way to provide for myself and these children.

However, as I had expected it was not easy. The discrimination of Omegas was greater in the big city. I approached several establishments, all with signs put up looking for employees, but the first question I was asked was regarding my secondary sex. The moment they learnt that I was an Omega, they either turned me down or lied about already having found someone for the position. And these were just for simple part-time jobs.

Nights in the fall were chilly, not yet cold. With nowhere to go, I had to find a place to rest outdoors. The first night I tried a park, but I was questioned by policemen. I smoothly lied to them about my situation, that I was simply out because of an argument with my parents and was told to quickly go home. In the end, I snuck into an alley, behind a row of shops and slept there. It was not comfortable, so I ended up waking up too early. I snuck off before I could see anyone, and my day began again. This repeated for a few days.

I took baths at a nearby bathhouse once every three days and ate cheap meals, wherever I could find them. I also returned to the same place to sleep each night, since it was out of the public eye.

At least week and a half passed like that, and I was still unable to find employment. It was beginning to affect to my physical and mental states, the latter more so than the former as I begun to grow worried about the condition of the two children in me.

Shortly after I was rejected by another shop once again, I helped an elderly woman who was struggling with her shopping. She invited me for a meal at her husband's establishment, a small eatery serving soba noodles, in exchange for my help. I would have refused, but I was hungry. As she sat me down, she held my hand. I was confused by her actions, but she commented that it seemed that I needed some help. Her kindness towards me, a mere stranger, touched me and could not help but hold back my tears.

I told her about how I had left home, and my desire to protect my children from my parents who wanted them gone. I did not know specifically what I had told her, but I know I did not tell her anything about Riku. However, she silently listened to me, something which I had appreciated. Her husband said nothing except to eat my fill when he set a bowl of hot noodles on the counter in front of me. It was the most delicious meal I had for a very long time.

I insisted on paying for the meal, despite the old woman insisting that it was on the house. Imagine my surprise when the old man had turned down the money with a suggestion.

"If you really want to pay us back, why don't you do so with your body? Us old folks could use a pair of young hands here every now and then."

That was how I began working at soba shop Yamamura and living together with the couple.

I later learnt that the couple had a daughter, who comes by to help on occasion, and a grandson who used to help out regularly but was unable to due to his parents' divorce. I did not pry too deep into the matter. I only met the latter once, and I did not have a good impression of him as he came across as a rude person.

My stay with the shop only lasted about a month.

One day, I was serving the customers, as per normal. I had noticed this one particular man who had been sitting in the store for a while even after he had finished his meal, and the way he was looking at me made me feel uncomfortable. He gave out the aura of an Alpha, dressed and presenting himself in a prim and proper manner. Perhaps he was a businessman who had dealings somewhere in the nearby business district; we had many of those customers. However, I did not expect him to confront me at the back when I went to take out the trash.

He introduced himself as Kujou Takamasa, a businessman who runs a small but prominent consulting company, in addition to owning shares in several major companies. He said that he was interested in me and wanted to scout me to work for him.

It was clearly suspicious. Being wary of people like him, I refused. Unfortunately, he did not give me the option to do so. I was threatened with the soba shop's existence, something about an urban development project or something that I could not quite grasp. It felt like a scene out of a drama or comic but it was actually happening to me in reality, and I did not know what to do.

I had no choice but to agree, but I was curious.

Why did it feel that he was so insistent on wanting me, and what did he intend to do with me?

I put forth those questions to him and to my surprise he actually answered them properly, instead of brushing them off which I thought he would have done.

"Your pretty little face and sweet voice is a rarity, even for an Omega." He spoke in his usual low tone. "You would certainly be able to become a valuable asset under my care and grooming. This is, of course, not just to my benefit but to yours as well. Don't you have something... no, someone very important to you that you want to protect? I can grant you the power and ability to do so. Of course, it is a means that is not agreeable to the moral beliefs of some, but it is the option that is the most viable to someone in your current situation. That, I can assure you."

At that moment, I recalled something I had read online about something called the Omega Courtesan. They were Omegas either adopted or born from wealthy and distinguished Alpha families who were groomed to be objects. Their main job was to satisfy the Alphas of high society by providing entertainment... often of the sexual nature. Some were also used as bargaining chips, to secure business deals or important transactions.

No doubt, this man wants me for the latter.

And he was being honest about it.

He did not seem like a bad person, despite the impression he initially gave. And, he said he wanted me. He wanted me, who was rejected by so many others, even by my own family and the only person I loved.

However, could I trust a man like him?

"I'm pregnant, and with two children in me that no one wants. Despite this, are you sure you still want to take me in your charge?"

His next question took me by surprise.

"Do you love them?"

"What?"

"Do you love those unborn children, who you claim that no one wants? If you do, then there is no need for you to doubt any further or have reason to hesitate."

Without needing me to say it out loud, he knew what my answer was. With a slight twinge of fear and uncertainty in my heart, I took his outstretched hand.

The next day, I moved out of the old couple's home to his fancy apartment located in a lavish part of the big city.

Kujou-san, as the man insists to be called, told me of his plans for me. First, I would have to learn about society, both in general and specifically the kind I would have to interact with, and the nature of his business. There were also lessons in fine etiquette and other things, so my days were busy. Aside from this, he also took my personal care and wellbeing into consideration. It felt strange to be treated this well by a man that only sees me as a tool.

Moreover, with each passing day, I could feel my abdomen getting bigger and heavier... it was a sign that the children were growing well, and that was nothing but a relief to know.

However, not a day would pass without me thinking of Riku.

Perhaps because it was the early days of winter, the coldest and driest season of the year. For Riku, it was the worst kind of environment for his body. I hope he was taking care of himself, now that he no longer has me to watch over him. But now that I am pregnant, I would have to look after myself as well.

It was slightly after the year had passed that Kujou-san introduced me to Tsunashi Ryuunosuke. He was a man who was five years older than me, a gentle giant who was also an Alpha despite not acting like one. He was to be my personal groomer, who would take care of my appearance for important events as well as... other needs. We were left to get acquainted, but it was awkward as he seemed kind of shy and I was not one to talk much to people I was not familiar with.

He initiated the conversation, after a week or so I began to see him as a friend.

Ryuu, as he preferred to be called, had been recently married to his mate who I was introduced to the next month in early February. The pair had their first child, a healthy young boy named Sakuya who was born the month before Sougo-san, who was three years younger than him, turned twenty and two months before the couple was able to get married. Like Ryuu, Sougo-san was also kind and gentle, so much so that I felt that I did not deserve it.

Thanks to the two of them, I learnt a lot about pregnancy and child-rearing. In addition, I felt that I was not alone for the first time in a long while.

Through check-ups at a clinic recommended by Kujou-san, I discovered that I was carrying dizygotic twins—like Riku and I—except that they were of different sexes. A boy and a girl... that sounded nice and pleasing. However, as long as they were born healthy, I could not ask for more.

Somehow, life seemed to feel normal again. Once I had realised that, an uneasy feeling began to stir within me again as if something terrible was soon going to happen soon.

And you know what?

I was right.

At the beginning of March, I fell sick and was diagnosed with the flu. I had thought that it was just a regular viral infection, which the doctor had diagnosed it to be. However, I did not think that things would have become more serious than the doctor had expected and before I knew it, it was too late.

When I felt the gush of liquid between my legs, I knew my water bag had burst. Unfortunately, there was no one other than me around as Kujou-san was out of the city on a business trip. In addition, the caretaker that he had hired to look after me for the last week of my pregnancy was only due to begin work the week after.

I was alone and scared.

I did not know what to do.

My mind was in a state of panic, the safety of my children was the only thing in my mind.

I did not know how much time had passed when Ryuu suddenly appeared, saying something about Sougo-san sensing that something was off. I clung to him and begged for help. When he realised what had happened, he called for an ambulance. However, before I had passed out before it came, and when I came to I was in the hospital.

The doctor there informed me that I was not yet ready for labour, which will happen soon enough and they would keep watch until that time. In the meantime, I was administered medication to keep the infection at bay while tests were being done to determine how strong my children's lungs were. However, I would have none of that. Something was wrong with one of the children, or perhaps both of them, and I could feel it. Something had to be done right away.

During the ultrasound, my worries came true: the sacs of both children had broke (at different intervals, to note: I was told that the second one ruptured on the way to the hospital) and one was beginning to show signs of minor complications. From how I saw it, she was struggling to breathe, but the doctor claimed otherwise.

At this time, I was unusually panicked. All I remember saying was, "Get them out of there!" repeatedly; more of screaming rather than speaking.

I felt that I could no longer keep them safe and that I felt that they were in constant danger as long as they were still inside. The doctors left me with so much uncertainty and that did not help quell my anxiety one bit.

I was told by the doctor that he had to be sure that the children's lungs were mature enough before they could be born. In addition, I was still infected with the flu, which they had to keep at bay before it affects the children.

The first night at the hospital was like living in hell.

I could not sleep at all, my arms wrapped around my swelled abdomen as I kept praying that the children would be safe. The fact that the day after that passed without much news or updates made it equally difficult to sleep the next night. Sougo-san came by to visit, but even his presence did nothing to put me at ease.

On the fourth evening that I was hospitalised, the contractions started. It was nothing like those I have felt before, and I knew it was time.

"Please be safe, please be safe." I murmured to them softly as I was wheeled to the delivery room.

I went through at least six hours of labour before delivering both children by natural birth. It may have been longer. I lost count. It was so unbearably painful that I thought I would not be able to hold out. It was late in the night or the wee hours of the morning when I finally gave birth to the first child—the girl. The boy about an hour later.

Once I had pushed the second child out of me, I passed out from the exhaustion.

When I woke up the sun was high in the sky and Kujou-san was by my side. He congratulated and thanked me for holding out, but there was something grim about his expression. He was not wearing his usual smirk on his face. He called for the nurse, who informed the doctor that I had regained consciousness.

I did not think that he would come with devastating news.

My daughter was not able to survive. She was not stillborn, but her little lungs were not able to work hard enough to let her take in enough oxygen, despite being put in the incubator in the neonatal intensive care unit. I knew that this may have been something that she inherited from Riku, something which the doctor had presumed as well. As for the other child, he too was struggling to survive. I was told to be prepared to lose him as well.

I asked to see my son. It was a decision I regretted, as I broke down seeing his tiny figure attached to numerous tubes.

The nurse helped me back to the ward to rest. A meal was brought in for me, but I had little appetite. I would have chosen not eat anything, but Kujou-san had made sure that I ate at least half of what I was served. He had told me that I would still have to produce milk for that child and if I do not eat, he would not be able to get nutrients that he needs to fight for his life. The nurse who came in to teach me about that after the meal told me the exact same thing.

"If you truly love that child, you would not want him to give up hope," Kujou-san advised with his hand over mine. "As his parent, you have to be the one who shows him that that glimmer of hope would be enough, lest he will lose his ability to believe in it, and in himself."

He was right.

It was not as if I had lost both children.

My son was still alive. He was trying his best to continue living. Yet I... I treated him as if he was already gone. Just because I had lost one child, I chose to despair over that instead of giving and praying for hope for the one who is still surviving.

I was a fool.

I do not deserve to be his parent.

For the first time in the longest while, I cried myself to sleep.

The next morning, Kujou-san came to visit me again.

"That reminds me, you have not picked out a name for this child, have you? It has been long believed that a child's name is the second blessing bestowed to them by their parents, aside from the gift of life." As he said that, he put a slip of paper in my hands: my son's birth certificate. "Take your time to think and choose one wisely."

He then left me alone in the ward after that.

It was a simple task, or so I thought, but yet surprisingly difficult. I tried to think of one, but nothing came to mind that sounded right.

Before I knew it, I found myself staring out of the window next to my bed. All I could see was the clear blue sky, wide and open before my eyes. It was an unconscious habit of mine, to glance out to look at the sky whenever I was feeling troubled or weary. Its vastness was calming and never failed to put me at ease. It also made me feel like I could accomplish anything and everything, giving me the strength I needed to keep going.

The sky… huh…

The answer I was searching for surfaced in my head, and I wrote it down immediately.

'Sorata'… sky fields.

My hope for him was that he would be a child with a heart and big and wide as the sky, so that it may hold lots of courage and strength. With it, he would be able to overcome any hardship or difficulty that he may face at any point in his life.

I do not know if I would be able to raise him well or provide him with a good life for his future. That is why I can only continue to hope that this little blessing will keep him going.

Later that afternoon, I was taught something called kangaroo care.

When the tiny infant, still connected to all the tubes, was placed skin-to-skin on my chest, I could not hold back the tears that flowed down my cheeks. He was cold to the touch, but yet there was faint warmth that indicated he was alive. There was a strange feeling that stirred within me as I watched him snuggle against my chest before falling asleep. It was something akin to relief, joy and emotional calmness. All three were things that I have not experienced in a very long time.

Surely, these were his gifts to me.

They were simple things, yet so important.

I was convinced, the moment he held my finger in his little hand and blinked at me to show his ruby red eyes—just like Riku's, that everything will be all right.

This child would be fine.

And so will I.

As long as we had each other, there would be nothing to fear or anything that we cannot overcome.

Just like how the sun rises each morning to signal a brand new day, my life with this precious little child would be the start of a brand new life.

**- Intermission 1: "Brand new day" end -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nezu Dango drew Sorata (and his favourite Mr Cat) along with Umi-chan, Tenn and Riku (plus the children's best friends/'little stalkers' Sakuya and Charles) for my birthday! ([You can find it on her twitter account!](https://twitter.com/NezuDango/status/953521032802967552)) Thank you so much, Nezu-san! I have never felt more blessed.
> 
> Sorata's profile will be up after chapter 3B!


	10. Chapter 4A

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Instead of just A and B, I may need to have a part C for this time. Reason being that I felt it appropriate to have the divide between parts so I can focus on one thing at a time.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Tenn's POV**

After sending Sougo-san and the children off, Ryuu drove us to the Grand Marine Hotel, located in another part of the city. There was still half an hour before the designated time, so he made no haste finding a place to park his vehicle. After he did, he retrieved his make-up kit from the trunk.

And when I say 'kit', I am referring to something the size of a suitcase, if not larger.

But I digress.

When we arrived at the lobby, Kujou Takamasa... my benefactor and in a way employer, was waiting with a familiar magazine in one hand and a cup of hot tea in the other.

He put both down when he noticed us approaching, and offered his usual smile. "Good morning, Tenn and Ryuunosuke-kun. I'm pleased to see that you are early as always. Come, have a seat."

We returned his greeting with our own and joined him at the table meant for four, with me sitting on his right and Ryuu on his left. As I sat down, my eyes darted to the cover of the magazine. It was an issue for a men's fashion magazine that I recently modelled for, a title that a man like Kujou-san would rarely read otherwise.

"Could I get you both something to drink? I heard the coffee here is superb, but unfortunately it's not my cup of tea." He raised his cup to prove his point.

His cold joke aside, we knew that his offer was simply for formality as we always refused.

"We're fine, thank you for your offer."

Kujou-san was not one to rush into things, so we waited silently until he finished his pot of what smelled distinctively like his usual assam tea. I have lived in his apartment long enough to recognise his preferences by scent, despite the fact that he was rarely at home.

When he was done, he set the cup and saucer aside and places his hands on his lap.

"Tenn, how is Sorata doing?"

He was just speaking normally, but there was something unnerving about the way his deep tone breaks the silence. In a way, it felt like the calm before the storm.

"He is doing fine, thank you for your concern."

"What about your family, Ryuunosuke-kun? I heard your mate is currently pregnant with your third child?"

"Ah, yes, he is. He is almost four months along. He and the child, as well as our two sons are healthy and well."

"Health is wealth; to hear such news is always pleasant. Now then," he folded his hands and placed them on the table. "On to today's event. The client for tonight is CEO Midou. We will be having dinner with him and his son at the Seafloor Restaurant, located on the seventh floor this hotel. I have made arrangements for a suite room, as usual. Tenn, I believe you have made his acquaintance before?"

"Yes... at the Christmas gala organised by the Sasaki Corporation last year."

CEO Midou... I do not like that man.

My first impression and encounter with him had certainly been unpleasant.

Like any typical Alpha in his fifties, the man was arrogant and considered himself superior. However, he was the type of person who did not hesitate to flaunt his wealth and status. He spoke in a loud voice and a crude, pretentious tone. The way he dressed was so showy it could only be described as gaudy.

In addition, he had a notorious for being extremely frivolous and a sleazebag. He was well known for his many sexual affairs and bed partners. Rumour has it that his wife had left him because he refused to do anything about his infidelity despite her bearing with it for so long. He would not hesitate to put his hands on any person (I mean this literally) who caught his fancy. Even at the gala, he had his hand on my ass for the five minutes while I was talking to him and even dared to grope it. I can still remember the disgusting feeling of his hand through the tight pants I wore that day.

At that time I could not do anything about it. Being a well-known Omega Courtesan in that circle and in order to preserve Kujou-san's reputation, I had no choice but to quell my temper, watch my manners and bear with it.

If only he did not have this vice, he would surely be a man deserving of my respect. Kujou-san once said that his business sense was second to none, and that had lead to him raising his company up from the ground in just a handful of decades.

However, I got nothing but a bad feeling about this arrangement.

"Tenn. you will need to have the usual check-up first. The doctor is waiting in the suite, where you would get ready. CEO Midou had gone through the trouble of hand-picking what you would wear tonight. Because of this, please make sure he wears it well, Ryuunosuke-kun."

"As always, I will do my best."

It was not uncommon for a client to select clothes for the Omega Courtesan that will serve them for a night. Many had specific or certain preferences, of which some ranged from being rather queer to completely outrageous.

Kinky maid outfits, nurse dresses so short it barely covered my ass, bikinis, raunchy lingerie, lace and sheer, black latex… I have been made to wear many of these and more during my almost-five years of doing this. This may be my first time with CEO Midou, but I do not think that his choice would be anything surprising. However, no matter what I wore, Ryuu always made sure that I looked my best.

"And as for tomorrow..."

"Tomorrow?!"

I was as puzzled as Ryuu was. Such affairs only lasted for one night, and Kujou-san was not a person who would schedule two of such appointments in a row. In addition, neither of us heard about having arrangements on Sunday. Ryuu was supposed to return home after helping me dress and make up, so this was more of a shock to him than it was for me.

"It was a matter that had just been decided this morning. I didn't have the time to inform you of this, but there was no need to as it was just a simple matter. We would be just be having a casual lunch with President Yaotome. Ryuunosuke-kun, you are not involved with this matter so you do not have to be concerned."

"Oh."

I actually found myself looking forward to that compared to tonight's job.

Yaotome Sousuke is the president of the talent agency that I was signed under. He was a stern man with a firm outlook, enabling him to make his talents as successful as they are now. From what I know, Kujou-san had known him for a long time, and while they were not friends they seemed more than mere acquaintances. They regularly met up for meals when Kujou-san was in the city, but I did not expect to be invited this time.

Knowing the kind of man Kujou-san is, he must have something in mind.

What it may be, that I do not know.

Ahh, I miss Sorata already. I hope he is having fun at the theme park with Sougo-san right now. I will be sure to give him lots of cuddles when I see him tomorrow.

"Do the both of you have any questions about the arrangements?"

"No, not at all."

"None for me, too."

"Good. Now then." Kujou-san stood up from his seat and picked up his belongings. "Shall we head up, then?"

**\- to be continued -**


	11. Chapter 4B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This part got longer than I thought it would so I had to shuffle some plans around.
> 
> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"Welcome back, Tenn. How was the check-up?"

The check-up was performed in the bedroom of the suite. It was like any regular check-up at the hospital, with an additional test to check for any abnormalities with my sex hormones. This was to confirm that there would not be any long-term effects of the drug I had taken in middle and high school, as well as of the birth control pill that I now regularly take. Other than the fact that my heats come less regularly compared to the average Omega, there seemed to be nothing out of the ordinary.

While I was with the doctor, Ryuu had set up his workstation in the suite's powder room. He had probably seen the outfit that was prepared for me and already took notes on how he will make me look later, which I spotted on the table in front of the couch he was sitting on.

When I entered, he was using his smartphone, probably reading something or chatting with his beloved.

"The usual." I looked around the living room of the suite. "Where's Kujou-san?"

"He had a meeting to attend, so he stepped out. He said it will finish in the mid-afternoon he will return before the appointed time."

"I see."

I took a seat in the armchair on Ryuu's left, with my back facing the entrance of the suite. It was comfortable to sit on, as I could feel my weight being gently supported by the thick, cushioned material.

"In the meantime, he had instructed for us to order room service for lunch. Do you want to look through the menu?"

"I'll do that."

Knowing the kind of man CEO Midou is, he would certainly order more food than what could be finished. In addition, he would mostly order seafood, which the restaurant is famous for, and mostly high-calorie dishes. I am not one who would partake in such overindulgence, but it would be rude to eat too little. With that in mind, something simple and healthy like sandwiches and some assorted fruits will suffice for lunch.

I gave Ryuu my order and he phoned the restaurant to place our orders. As he was doing that, the doctor excused himself and left the room.

My bag had been left on the couch where Ryuu was sitting on. It was within arm's length so I simply reached into it to retrieve my own smartphone. The lock screen displayed several messages from the Rabbit Chat application, and they were from Sougo-san. He had sent me several images, according to the preview.

I quickly swiped the screen with my thumb and keyed in the six-digit passcode. I opened the private chat between me and Sougo-san. We often shared information and advice related to our children, recipes, little stories and many other things that housewives tend to talk about.

When I opened the chat, I noticed that he had sent me photographs of their day thus far at the amusement park.

The first was a shot of Sorata and Sakuya waiting for the show to start. I could not help but notice how crowded it was in the background. Unlike Sakuya who flashed a wide-toothed grin, Sorata only offered a shy smile while hugging his Mr Cat.

The second was of the two children holding hands, with the Sky Rangers behind them. This must have been after the show. However, something about that picture felt off for a moment, and I realised it was because he was not carrying his plush toy. I hoped he did not forget it.

Amusingly enough, just as the thought popped into my head, Sougo explained in his next message that Sorata did forget his plush toy. Because of this, he had gotten momentarily separated from them.

Fortunately, he was discovered by some teachers from the kindergarten who happened to be there. That was supposed to be a relief but instead, it gave me a sense of foreboding. My sixth sense has never been strong, but it was more accurate than not.

According to Sougo-san, they were now moving together as a group. They even took a group photograph and that was the last thing in the chat log.

And what do you know? That sense of foreboding was right.

The first thing I noticed in the picture was Riku.

He was smiling the same way he used to when he was enjoying something from the bottom of his heart. Next to him was Izumi Iori, a Beta like Riku who I remembered was the assistant teacher in charge of Sorata's class. That means they are co-workers. But, why are they together? It was a day off work, so they had no reason to be together... unless... the two of them were...

"Tenn? Hey, you okay?" Ryuu's voice brought me out of my thoughts. I turned to him, wondering why he had called me. "I was calling you to tell you that lunch had arrived, but it seemed that you didn't hear me. Is something the matter? Is your stomach hurting?"

"Oh, no, I'm fine."

"Are you sure? Your face was quite pale..."

"I said I'm fine. Come, let's eat."

Why? I already expected something like that to happened.

As his older brother, I should be happy for him, because he found someone who was special to him. But what I was feeling was nothing close to joy. Instead, it felt like my chest was being impaled by a thousand blades. It was a truly unpleasant feeling that was unfamiliar, yet unmistakable.

If I had to put a name to this feeling... it was, no doubt, "jealousy".

But in my opinion, it was strange. It did not make any sense for me to feel this way.

Despite what had happened that day, and before this, we were just brothers. Normal siblings that were brought up close to each other. In addition, I had already assumed that he had already found someone to spend his life with and was now happy and content with his life, as he deserved to be unlike a person such as myself.

I let out a small sigh, driving the thoughts to a corner of my mind.

I was never one who would let anything interfere with my work. No matter what the task or circumstance, I will not allow myself to deliver slipshod work or poor quality. This is especially important, as I am only doing this to provide for and protect my precious child.

Kujou-san had given me the chance, power and ability to do both.

I owe him a huge debt that goes beyond the money he had provided for our livelihood. That is why I chose to go along with each and every one of his whims and desires.

Ryuu and I finished lunch silently. After eating, we took a brief break to let the food settle before beginning the preparations for the night.

The room itself would be prepared discreetly during the dinner by the hotel staff, who have received Kujou-san's instructions by this time. However, before that is my making and dressing up.

First was, of course, a bath.

The bath of this hotel's suite room was already drawn up by Kujou's instructions. I did not need to see the rose petals floating on the water to know that it was a floral scented bath.

This arrangement was the same as always.

Initially, Kujou-san had an assistant to help me prepare. Perhaps he was worried if my conviction to be his doll was wavering and would try to run away. Throughout the first year, I had proved myself to him and that individual was no longer needed. However, because I was not skilled in doing makeup or beautifying my own appearance, Ryuu's assistance was needed.

In this sense, I was grateful to Kujou-san for introducing me to him. Because of this, I have managed to gain two irreplaceable friends, and Sorata himself was able to make a proper friend at such a young age.

As there was still plenty of time, I washed and conditioned my hair at my own pace. It had grown so long that it now reached below the blades of my shoulders. While I have no intention to cut it, I had Ryuu trim it every now and then to keep it neat. I initially kept it long for one particular job, but Sorata once said that he liked my hair so I decided to grow it out to the length that it was at now.

After scrubbing my body with soap and rinsing, I stepped into the bath. A heated tub that could keep the water hot was to be expected for such a grand suite, and I sank right into the warmth of the water. It was comfortable and pleasant, making my tense muscles relax completely.

If only I could let all my worries be washed off just by soaking, too.

I soaked in the bath for what felt like about twenty minutes—my usual duration. I got out when I felt that I was in the tub too long, grabbing a towel that was hung nearby to dry off. As I did I left the bathroom to enter the dressing area in the powder room, where I finally caught sight of the outfit that was prepared for me.

The first thing that came to my sight were the colours red and black.

I lifted the garment up in front of me, arms stretched out. This was, no doubt, a dress and one that was in the Japanese gothic lolita style. However, even for a dress, the hem was much too short. I was not even sure if it would completely cover my crotch when I sit down.

Not to mention that it came with fishnet stockings, a lace thong, a garter belt and other accessories... as expected, that geezer really was a pervert through and through.

I heard two knocks on the door of the powder room.

"Ryuu? You can come in."

"Tenn, are you done dressing yet... ah! I'm sorry!" Ryuu opened the door as I told him to, but when he noticed that I was still wearing a towel while holding the black thong in my hands he quickly shut it again.

"Ryuu, I said you can come in."

"No! It's fine! I'll just wait here so call me when you're done!"

"That's not it, Ryuu. I'm going to need a bit of help with putting on the dress. I can't reach the zipper."

"... Oh."

Finally understanding my point of view, Ryuu let himself in while wearing a sheepish reaction.

I first put on the thong and the stockings, which had to be held up by the suspenders of the black garter belt to stay up, then the dress. The petticoat was sewn in as the bottom-most layer of the skirt, so I did not have to put on anything else underneath the garment. Last but not least were the accessories: a black lace choker and a pair of lace-trimmed wristbands. There were a few meant for my hair, which I passed to Ryuu for him to work with later.

After he helped me to zip up the dress, I took a seat a the counter in front of the huge mirror and was ready for him to do his magic.

He would always start with my hair, which had to be blow-dried by him before he could style it. He decided on a variant of twin tails, in order to best make use of the hair accessories provided.

For a chatty man, Ryuu was unusually quiet when he was focusing on his work. There would be a sharp firmness to his normally soft expression, but seeing him this serious was never a bad thing. Most of all, he had pride and held high esteem in his skills and work, which was something that would have allowed him to become one of Japan's top stylists despite only being in his mid-twenties. However, because he was bound to me by a business contract, he was unable to expand his wings to reach the top.

I once spoke to him about this, but he did not seem the least bit bothered by this.

He told me that as long as he can provide for his family and make them happy, especially his husband, that was all that mattered.

From what I heard, Kujou-san does pay him quite a substantial sum although part of it was probably a kind of bribe to keep him quiet about these private affairs. Of course, it was not needed seeing the kind of person Ryuu is, but Kujou-san was insistent about procedures and matters like this.

Before I knew it, Ryuu was done with my hair and had begun with my make-up.

There was nothing for me to do the entire time. All I could do was to stare at myself in the mirror and watch as he starts putting layers and layers of stuff over my eyelids, on my nose, lips, cheeks... basically my entire face. Still, it is amazing how he was able to make my appearance change so much.

The first time he did it, I thought that the person in the mirror was someone else.

Five years later, and I have to confess that I am still not completely used to it.

The moment he finally puts down his brushes and tools and places his arms by his side with a small sigh, I knew he was done.

"Thank you for your hard work, Ryuu."

"Since the outfit was in a gothic theme, I went for colours that I usually won't use for you. But it's good since it's meant to contrast with your pale skin, the way the clothes do. But because it's in a Japanese style as well, I tried to use those colours to give off a more traditional sort of impression... ah, I'm blabbering again, aren't I? Sorry!"

"No, it's fine. I can tell how hard you thought to come up with this."

"What do you think?"

"By visual appearance, it feels a lot different than usual. Even though it's not your first time going with darker colours. But I like it."

"Really? That's great."

"I see that the both of you are done." The sudden appearance of Kujou-san almost made my heart jump. "Hmm... I have to agree with Tenn. You have done an excellent job as always, Ryuunosuke-kun."

"T-Thank you, Kujou-san."

"If you would be so kind, I would need you to excuse yourself promptly. I would need to have a quick chat with Tenn... just the two of us."

Oh?

That expression clearly hints that he has something up his sleeve.

However, I did not like the way he was pressuring Ryuu to leave. It was impolite; rude even. Also, he still needs to pack up, which takes a while due to him being cautious about the care of his tools.

"This is barely the place for conversation, Kujou-san. Shall we proceed to the living room instead?"

My words did not hide my suspicions, and he was more than aware of that.

However, no matter what I feel or think, I will never be able to turn or do anything against him.

This is something that he is clearly aware of.

And he revels in that knowledge.

"Yes... of course."

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need to apologise for the lack of descriptives with the makeup and styling scene because I know nothing about makeup and all that. I have sensitive skin and my father disapproved throughout my teenage years so I became this kind of hopeless adult female.


	12. Chapter 4C

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

Leaving the powder room, Kujou-san and I sat in the living room of the suite, opposite of each other. He only began to speak after Ryuu left the room so we spent several minutes just sitting in silence, which was relatively awkward on my part.

Who would not be, if they were being stared at the entire time?

He was looking towards me with such an intense gaze and was trying to get me to look in the eye. It felt like he was trying to read my thoughts, as though they were an open book to him. I returned his gesture by facing in his direction but avoided looking straight into his eyes.

It was not because I hated or was uncomfortable with his presence. What I did not like was how he was always so secretive and cunning, and how he seemed to read others so easily while keeping himself completely concealed.

"Sorata will be starting elementary school, next year, won't he?"

As always, he begins speaking by bringing up unexpected things that take me by surprise.

"Yes, he would be." But what about it?

I would have let those words out of my mouth, but I knew it would certainly come off as being disrespectful so I held them back.

"Despite being aware of that, you are still sheltering and spoiling him. I understand that, in terms of his own development, he is behind his peers by a significant amount. This may be attributed to the circumstances of his birth, but something can be done about it from your end. By treating him like a child, he will keep thinking that he will always be a child."

"With all due respect, Kujou-san, Sorata is only five. I believe that he should take his time to catch up with his peers and grow up at his own pace."

He shook his head at me, clearly disappointed. "And this is why I said that you are spoiling him. You are being much too lenient with him."

I had to frown at his words, as he was contradicting himself.

"Please get straight to the point, Kujou-san. We both know that beating around the bush will get us nowhere."

"If you insist, I shall get down to the heart of the matter, then."

Retrieving a padded folder from his briefcase, he set it down on the coffee table. He beckoned for me to take it, which I did. I opened it slowly and cautiously, but one glance was all I need to know what this was about. It also made me understand what exactly he was planning, in regards to tomorrow's affair.

Shutting it quickly, I placed it back on the table, but I was not so stupid that I will accept what he was offering without questioning.

"What is this?"

My tone clearly showed my displeasure. However, Kujou-san was not fazed by it.

"As you can see, it is a photograph of the man who has become your marriage interview partner and eventually will become your mate and life partner. He is a suitable Alpha and a person who is not unfamiliar to you, so I'm sure you are aware of the kind of person he is."

"I know that this is for a marriage interview. I was asking what you are planning on making me go through this."

"Tenn." He put down the leg he was crossing to place both feet on the carpet. "Don't you think it's about time that you settle down?"

"I believe I said that I do not need a partner."

"You may not need a partner, but Sorata needs a father."

"I already said I can and will raise Sorata by myself. I don't need anyone else to do it with me, nor do I want them to."

"Silence." The deepening of his brows was a sign of his annoyance at my insistence, and I kept my mouth shut immediately. "This is not a matter of what you think or feel. Your opinion has nothing to do with this. You are just a mere puppet who should not be allowed to utter as much as a single word. Do you understand?"

I nodded my reply slowly.

Although his attitude irked me, I sincerely hoped that I did not cross a boundary that I should not have.

"Don't you forget that I am your legal guardian. Sorata may only be a Kujou in name but in the eyes of the law, I am his grandfather. I have every right to decide what is the best for that child, even more than you do. There is only so much you can do for that child. It is not apparent as of now as he is still of a young age, but the lack of a father in his life would have an adverse impact on him in the future as he grows older and more as an individual. You may be his mother, the person who gave birth to and raised him, but no matter how hard you try you cannot be a replacement of what a father would be to him in his life."

I clenched my fists tightly and gritted my teeth.

What he said was true.

Somewhere deep in my heart, I already knew that I alone would not be able to completely provide for Sorata. This was not just about his daily and physical needs, such as food or shelter. It was referring to what he needed for his personal development... in the emotional, psychosocial and other aspects.

I was aware that, when it comes to Sorata, I had both consciously and unconsciously avoided the topic of his father.

Consciously because I was afraid that he would come to hate me. Afraid that he would push me away, just had Riku had done, and that I would become alone again.

Unconsciously was probably due to my own ego. Despite it being almost six years since that day, I was still unable to forgive myself for being the cause of what had happened that day. I am still plagued by nightmares of Riku saying and showing how much he hated and despised me. That would always make me wake up in the middle of the night in cold sweat, with my heart pounding fast within the confines of my chest.

If I had been alone, I may have thought that I would not mind dying for my sins. However, when I see my precious and only son… our son sleeping next to me peacefully, some part of me felt that I could still go on. I could keep living, as long as I had my little Sora by my side.

But it was truly strange, amusing even.

I had been so negative and avoidant when it came to Riku. Yet I could not imagine my child calling anyone but him "Papa". I could not imagine anyone else caring for and loving for Sorata as much as he would.

That was why I had rejected the advance of many males, mostly Alphas, who approached me with the intention of making me their mate or partner. Even this person whom Kujou-san has chosen… I have known him for quite a while. He is not a friend, but definitely not a stranger to me. In fact, he had been one of the many that I have turned down.

I know I am being contradictory.

It was nothing my own selfish whims and wishes.

Yet, part of me was still insistent on being that selfish.

But I know that Kujou-san was right about Sorata needing a father in his life.

Despite having hired help, being part of a single-parent family was not easy. Not just for me, the parent, but for Sorata as well. He had gotten teased and looked down upon by his peers so many times at the kindergarten.

The children mocked him not only for not having a father but also for me, his mother, being absent for many school events due to work. From what I know, many of their parents also made gossip about our family's circumstances, many of the claims they made untrue. If it were not for his two close friends, Sakuya and Manami, he may have come to hate school. It was thanks to their smiles, kindness and acceptance that Sorata was able to have friends, which was normal for a child his age.

I am aware that Sorata knows that the family he grows up with is not normal, in a way that was defined by society. I have seen him look at the Tsunashi family many times with an envious eye, and once he even asked me about it. It was because I kept avoiding it that he chose not to bring up the topic anymore. Even though he always says that he does not need a father as long as he had me, I wonder if he really feels that way.

I have to stop being selfish and too concerned about myself.

"So, Tenn, what will your decision be?"

Since he was born, Sorata has always been the first priority in my life. And since I believed that, I have no choice but to accept this marriage proposal.

Well, it is not like Sorata is the kind of child who would refuse or have much difficulty warming up to strangers. Surely it will be awkward at first. But with time, he will definitely come to accept that person. He may be crude in the way he speaks and sometimes too blatantly honest for a man, but he is a good person at heart.

And... it does not feel bad having someone I could trust to look out for Sorata's well-being.

Just like the day I left home with the resolved to protect my children, I now too must make the same conviction that this will be for the best. Nothing less.

"I accept."

That simple answer and my firm gaze were all Kujou-san needed.

He smirked after hearing my words, seemingly pleased.

"I will make the proper arrangements, then." He collected the folder from the table, sliding it back into his briefcase. "Now then, shall we get going? It's about time for the dinner."

I nodded, standing up after he did to follow behind him.

Taking several deep breaths, I made myself calm down and brush aside this matter in my mind.

It was time to go to work.

_"Chapter 4" end_

**\- to be continued -**


	13. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm starting to get lazy to do comments, so if there are any questions pop them in [my Q & A box](https://peing.net/amamiya_toki) over here or in the comments.
> 
> But to confess I'm starting to worry if the monologue is beginning to get repetitive; I'm not exactly writing with an "entire story" view but a "chapter-by-chapter" view. I'll work out something if it gets that bad.
> 
> Next part will either be chapter 6 or another intermission, depends on what I would plot out for both.
> 
> **Written in Tenn's POV**

Kujou-san walked ahead of me as we made our way down to the restaurant.

The seventh floor was a common area accessible even by the public, and at this hour was filled with people. As soon as I stepped out of the lift, I could feel numerous gazes directed at me. I did not have to pay heed to the little whispers of gossip to know that they were talking about me, either. Ryuu's make-up was good enough that my identity would be hidden, so it was probably the rather indecent outfit that I was made to wear that attention.

I chose to ignore them to focus on keeping my posture and walk properly. Frankly, it was a little hard to do when the knee-high boots had heels that were far higher than what I was used to wearing.

Despite being fifteen minutes early, it seemed that our clients had arrived before us. The host led us to the private room that had been reserved, located at the end of the corridor that was adjacent to the one that leads to the main hall.

Upon opening the door, I could see CEO Midou and a young man... the supposed son, already sitting at the table.

We had been expected to meet at the entrance, to exchange our greetings before entering the restaurant to be seated. To sit down at the table first was an imprudent show of authority, which reflects how one sees themselves as being of higher regard than the other. I do not know if that was an iron-clad rule of high society, but it was something Kujou-san taught me. That is why at such events I always made sure that I was the last to sit, as I was the lowest in the social strata.

Kujou-san said nothing about this matter, instead of acting the same way that he always does.

"Good evening, Midou-sama. It is a pleasure being able to work with you again."

"Kujou! Welcome, welcome." The pot-bellied man stood up from his seat to return Kujou-san's greeting and shake his hand, albeit in a much too casual manner. "And you too, Tenn-kun! Welcome! Ahh, you look stunning as always! I hope you liked the outfit I specially picked out for you!"

I would rather die than shake his greasy hand, but this was for work... Sorata's sake so to speak, so I had to put on a poker face and bear with it.

"Good evening, Midou-sama. Thank you for the wonderful outfit."

"Pleasure's all mine. Come come, let us all sit down."

Kujou-san sat opposite him, and I took the seat next to Kujou-san. Opposite me was CEO Midou's son... what was his name again...

"Wow, Dad, who's this babe?" Wow, the son was just as rude as the father... no, more. He did not even bother to greet us properly. "She's smoking hot... you're an Omega?"

"Yes, I am." I am no good at handling this type of people, but fortunately, he was not the first I had witnessed. "My name is Kujou Tenn. Pleased to meet your acquaintance."

"Tenn... as in the model? The one who is famous for his androgynous looks and praised for his erotic portraits, and is known to have a brat? You're a dude?"

"Indeed I am."

If I was not holding myself back for the sake of work, I would have floored him for calling my absolutely adorable Sorata a brat. How dare he!

"Torao." CEO Midou made a stern face, but his voice barely hinted it at all. "That is a secret to be kept. Now that you are aware of it, don't go around running your mouth off, you hear?"

"Yeah yeah, got it." He seemed to be disregarding the importance of what he had just been told. "Oh, the name is Midou Torao. Nice to meet you."

The order for the food had been placed in advance. Kujou-san would usually give the clients a choice to decide on the menu for the evening or leave it up to him. CEO Midou, being a man who liked to be in control, obviously chose the former. Not just for food, but for the alcohol as well.

I was not fond of alcohol and neither was Kujou-san, but we were both strong drinkers. However, as expected of his line of business, his knowledge was second to none.

"The Chene Bleu 2011 Aliot." He raised his eyebrows in a manner of appreciation as the bottle was brought in by the waiter. "An unusual but excellent choice. I would not expect anything less from a man such as yourself, Midou-sama."

"The wine list here is superb! I had half the mind to go for a Kiku-Masamune, but since we're dining at a western joint, wine is the obvious choice!"

"If it is the only thing that old man has taste in, it'd be for food and drink." The son's comment was directed towards me. "The Scallop Carpaccio here is the best; you'll know it when you try it later. You'll fall in love with it with one bite."

Well, seeing how the two older men have begun to talk about business, it would only be natural to make conversation with the other person whose attention was currently not occupied. I would have gladly entertained him, but it was apparent that he was trying to flirt with me. It was very typical for Alphas to unleash their aura when they are trying to court a potential mate.

"Thank you for the recommendation. I will be looking forward to it."

Carpaccio was always served as an appetiser, especially in a full course meal as we were having today.

I had expected just scallops, but I was surprised to see a soft poached egg lying on top of the small yet generous mound of the shellfish. Admittedly, I do not fancy the richness of truffle, but it complemented the dish well. It was indeed, delicious, just as that man had said.

The rest of the dinner, much to my own surprise, was just as delicious. However, the one who should be praised are the chefs, not the person who recommended or selected the dishes.

For that reason, I chose to pay little heed to the father and son pair, who kept boasting about the food as well as about other matters.

However, even though the food tasted good, I could never find it satisfying. It does not apply solely to this particular establishment, but to all restaurants of this standard and class. I knew the reason without having to think. It was because such dinners were nothing but a formality, a facade of sorts between manipulative people. They were nothing like the dinners at home, filled with gentle warmth and cheerful smiles.

Rather than fancy and expensive stuff, I would very much have preferred a plate of my homemade omelette rice. That, and to have Sorata be the one sitting opposite me.

Perhaps this food would be more palatable if I was eating with him instead. However, that would be impossible, seeing how most of the money I earned when I started modelling was returned to Kujou-san who had paid for our living fees and all other things.

The dinner consisted of nine courses in total. Naturally, the dessert was the only item that did not contain seafood. The rest of the eight each featured one specific type in the dish that was served.

Food aside, there was also more alcohol than the initial bottle that was ordered. CEO Midou did order the bottle of Kiku-Masamune that he had mentioned about, only because Kujou-san had commented how the grilled tilapia would have paired well with Japanese sake. However, by that time, he had downed at least four glasses of the wine and was visibly tipsy. His son was no better; all it took was three glasses in and he started to drop his faux-sassy mannerisms and began flirting with me more openly. He even tried to run his foot up my leg, but the table was too large for anyone to play footsie comfortably if the person was sitting on the opposite side. Especially if one of them had pushed their chair back just a little, as I had done without anyone noticing.

I kept myself to two, my usual amount, and was perfectly fine. Kujou-san, however, had taken at least seven servings of both wine and sake combined by the end of the evening but he still seemed to be the same as always.

Then again, that man is a true blue monster.

CEO Midou, no doubt, had too much to drink. So did his son, although he managed to sober up before the end of the dinner.

Once dinner was over, Kujou-san would take his leave, leaving me to 'take care' of the client and tend to his every need. That was essentially the job of any Omega Courtesan, and that meant I would not be able to rest until he is satisfied.

Fortunately, CEO Midou was not so drunk that he could not walk straight. He simply needed some assistance, in which I provided in addition from escorting him to the suite. However, unlike some men which I have dealt with before who are unable to get it up when they are intoxicated, he was completely hard by the time we reached the bed. If I had to guess, it was most probably due to my scent.

Even when an Omega is not in heat, their natural scent would still be enticing to an Alpha. However, if the Omega is bonded to an Alpha, the scent of the latter will be mixed in as well. This deters other Alphas from approaching them.

For unbonded Omegas like me, there is always a concern regarding unintended bonding. That was why most Omegas wore chokers or collars to prevent Alphas from biting down on our necks during moments of heated passion. However, on regular days, I chose not to wear either of the two. I felt that by wearing it, it was a sign that I had accepted the societal view that Omegas were inferior and weak.

I hated that, as much as I hated self-centred Alphas who believed that they have every right to lord over others.

CEO Midou was definitely one of them. Ever since he had let the alcohol get the better of him, he had not called me by name even once. He continuously referred to me as an Omega, rather than as an individual. To him, I was just another hole to be fucked, rather than a fellow human being.

But, so be it.

To me, he was also nothing but another Alpha.

I was the one who chose to sleep with them solely because I had a reason to. I purposely lowered and humbled myself, submitting to them willingly while still holding resentment and hatred for them in my heart. It is only my body that they want, not my heart. Even if they had desired for it, I would not even consider giving the latter to them.

In such a relationship, there are no such things as feelings or passion involved. If anything, there is only pure lust stirred up by one's instincts. Alpha is, after all, like a beast who only copulates with another for the purpose of leaving their seed. It comes so naturally to them that there is no thinking involved. All they have to do is follow their urges, their instincts. That is why there is no need to feel anything for each other when it comes to sex.

If you look at this matter from another angle, we were simply using each other. A matter of give-and-take. Regardless of how anyone tries to use nice words to beautify it, that was just how it is.

In many ways, it was ironic. Then again, there are many things in the world that are ironic.

Just like how I believe that I had become filthy due to the nature of this work. At the beginning, I felt that I had no right to touch Sorata or even love him dearly. That was because he was innocent and pure, while I had become dirty and disgusting.

However, it was only because I became impure that he was able to remain clean.

Is that not an irony as well?

But that is how life is, and that is what it means to be a parent.

That is why I should, would and will do everything that is necessary, so that he may grow up to be a proper person. So that he would not make the same mistakes I have. So that he would become someone who would be able to have the strength to face adversity, and overcome anything that may happen.

I am aware that, despite doing everything I can for him, I would not be able to predict what may happen in the future.

However, I am aware that I would not be able to avoid telling Sorata about the truth behind his birth. Despite how society was more open to sex compared to my parents' time, incest was a still a huge taboo, and so was rape. He was born out of both. For anyone, it would be difficult to accept. At this time, he would not be able to understand the implications of that truth due to his young age. But when he would as a teenager or an adult, and it would definitely be a shock to him.

It is another irony how I would end up hurting him and our relationship as parent and child, the two things I wanted to protect the most.

Of course, there may be a chance that Sorata would come to accept it, not immediately, but I cannot guarantee that it would. Such things only happen in fiction, not in real life.

At the very least, all I can do when the time comes is to have hope and believe in him, and in the kind of person that he would become.

That, and if the Gods above would allow it, for my prayers will be heard and answered.

_"Chapter 5" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was in a rush to finish chapter 4 so I didn't share this earlier, but Nezu Dango had drawn something for this fic! 
> 
> [](https://twitter.com/NezuDango/status/957290488788279296)
> 
> Please support her, either on [twitter](https://twitter.com/NezuDango) or [Facebook](https://www.facebook.com/doujinkanezudango/)! (posted with permission!)


	14. Intermission 2: "A dream is a wish your heart makes...?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

Naive.

Innocent.

Pure.

These were the words which many people have used to describe me when I was much younger.

If I had to guess, it was because I knew less about the world and society as compared to other people my age. I used to believe that it was because I spent most of my childhood in the hospital and at home, rather than attending school regularly like other children. However, I realised years later that it was not the only reason why, and that it was nothing but an excuse.

As a child, I believed what I knew and experienced, and had faith in, was the absolute truth. I did not question them, nor did I bother to seek out more information to clarify or validate them. This was something I deeply regret at this point in time, but it is probably far too late to make amendments now.

However, despite what people think of me, I was good at keeping secrets.

There was one in particular that I have kept to myself for the past ten or so years. It was not because I had promised not to tell anyone or had to keep mum about it, but it was because it was a very strange situation that I myself am still unable to comprehend.

The incident happened the winter I was thirteen.

I was hospitalised due to the effect that the cold and dry environment had on my condition, as I would be each year.

On the third night there, I had a weird dream.

I do not remember what it was about, but it did leave an uneasy feeling stirring in me. I woke up in the middle of the night because of it, and the first thing I realised was that there was a strange, almost-tingling feeling in my lower half, in particular between my legs. When I checked what had happened, I was left shocked and surprised to see my pants and sheets stained.

The first feeling that I felt was fear.

I was already in middle school. Surely I was long past the age where I would still be wetting the bed. I guessed that that was not the case, but was unable to find a suitable reason to explain what had happened.

After that came a sense of embarrassment.

I had certainly soiled the sheets and would need some help to get the mess cleaned up. I had to call the nurse for help, which I did by pressing the button by the bed.

The panic caused by the situation had made my chest heavy, as my heart was pounding faster and lungs felt like they were being squeezed too tightly. The nervousness and worry that I would be made fun of added to that, and I felt like I was going to have one of the usual attacks.

Fortunately, the nurse arrived in time to calm me down and help administer my mediation using the inhaler. She talked to and soothed me with back rubs until I was back to normal.

I then explained to her what had happened. She listened carefully, like a mother would, before telling me that this was perfectly normal—all a part of growing up. However, as it was at an odd hour, she promised to explain to me when I woke up in the morning.

She gave me a fresh set of hospital gowns and sent me to get cleaned up, while she changed my bedsheets. Once that was all done I was put to bed. While I was afraid to sleep in worry that the incident would happen again, I was tired and nodded off quickly.

I woke up around the time the sun rose, about six in the morning.

I felt well enough to move about, so since I was not confined to the bed I hopped out, put on my slippers and made my way to the nurses' station, hoping that that nurse from the night before would still be there. She was, and she still remembered the promise she made to me last night.

She then told me that what I had experienced was a wet dream... a sign that I was growing up. About how my penis, usually soft, would turn hard sometimes when I sleep or when it is touched. She also told me that my bed was wet not because I peed myself, but something called ejaculation. I did not fully understand what the word itself meant or implied, then came the talk about sex, which was about making babies.

Because she made it simple to understand with examples of her own experiences with her son, I was able to quell my worries about the matter. However, she ended off by telling me that what she told me was a private matter, so I should only talk about it to people I was very, very close with.

At that age, what I had learnt that day was an eye-opener.

When Tenn-nii came to visit that day, I shared with him about it. I could not quite understand why Tenn-nii had blushed, just a little, after hearing about it, but I did not question it. However, I was very surprised when he said that he knew about it, but had not experienced it yet.

Since I was told that having wet dreams was normal, I had rationalised that him not having them was not. However, in my own context, I always considered Tenn-nii to be a person who was out of the ordinary. That was why him being not normal was the same as him being special.

After that initial dream, I did not see another for the remainder of my stay in the hospital. I thought that it was something that only happened once and forgot all about it.

However, it happened again shortly after I went home. This time, I was able to remember some parts of it. These dreams were from my own perspective, but I was unable to recall things like the location or context. What I do remember was that each and every one of those dreams featured the two same people: myself and Tenn-nii.

I would see the dream from my own perspective. In all of them, we were naked, and touching each other. When I mean touching, I do not mean normally, such as holding hands or pats on the shoulder. Places like our chests, arms, bellies... places that we have never touched before, in a manner that was light and gentle.

With our hearts pounding fast and hard, we did nothing but move our hands over each other's bare skin. Each place that we touched left an unusual feeling that resonated within our entire bodies.

The Tenn-nii in my dreams was wearing an expression on his face that I have never seen before. His face was flushed and if I had to describe it, it was one of pure bliss. He kept calling out my name, in a breathless voice that sounded like sweet music, and I felt that it made my heart pound faster.

Aside from this, the dreams would proceed in the same pattern. The time that we spent touching each other varies, but things would start escalating when his hands go downwards, between my legs.

I would be unable to suppress the small sound that escaped my lips when the fingers of his hand curls around my penis. As he moved that hand, I made more sounds, none of these I was able to hold back. I was completely at his mercy. The strange feeling that was lingering in my body felt like it was pooling up and ready to overflow.

And like a bad cliffhanger, I would wake up at that crucial time.

And when I do, I would feel a sense of discomfort, stemming from my crotch. When I check, I would find my penis hard and sticking up. I recalled being told that this was called an erection but was not specifically told how to handle it.

The first time it happened, I quickly ran to the toilet, locking the door to make sure no one comes in. I took off my pyjama pants and underwear, moving to sit on the toilet bowl.

I knew that I had to get something out of it to relieve the discomfort, but it would not come out no matter how hard I tried. It was very different from peeing, or so I concluded, but I was not quite sure what I should do.

My instincts told me that I should touch it, that by doing so may make me feel better.

However, I was scared, because I have never dared to do something like that before. I did not know what would happen, or what to expect if I did do it.

In the end, I gave in to my instincts.

When I touched, or rather grabbed, it, it felt hot in my hand. Inside of me, the familiar tingling sensation also started to build up. I started to stroke it, being as gentle as I could for fear that it would hurt or break. Instead of the expected pain, all I felt was a wave of pleasure.

It only took a short while before I ejaculated.

The first time I did, it was all over the toilet seat. Once I realised what had happened, I quickly cleaned everything up with toilet paper.

I go less scared and nervous as time passed, after doing it several times. However, I kept quiet about this incident, not even telling Tenn-nii about what happened. The reason was that I was afraid that if I did, I would have to tell him about the dreams involving him and that he would think that I was disgusting for doing this kind of things while thinking of him.

More than anything else, I was afraid that he would come to hate me.

This lasted for a few years. It used to be quite frequent, almost every day, but it slowly stretched out to being once a week, eventually once or twice a month. By the time I was in high school it had dwindled down to just several times a year. Eventually, I stopped seeing those dreams… the last one was in the early winter of the year I turned seventeen.

However, I still had the urge to touch myself there from time to time, which I started to do in the shower or bath even after I had moved out. Well, not in the tub of course, but before I went in.

This stopped after I begun working, as I would be too tired at the end of the day. I had no energy or time to think of such things. Yet, that night when I finally met Tenn-nii again after six long years, I got hard when I thought about him in the bath, and even got off thinking about him.

Thinking about it now, I never did think to question why Tenn-nii was the person who appeared in those dreams.

Sure, he was special to me.

But, was that all there was to it?

We were born brothers and are members of the same family. No matter how special he was, there was no way that he could go beyond that… could he?

I was not sure, and I do not know if I want to be.

And, you know what?

I probably will never be.

**\- Intermission 2: "A dream is a wish your heart makes...?" end -**


	15. Chapter 6A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

I said I did not want to brood on the matter, but I ended up spending a long time thinking and reflecting on Sunday, of course about Tenn-nii. The reason was that I did not think about how I should go about trying to talk to him, especially since I made the resolve to.

If I tried to speak to him face to face, he would treat me like a complete stranger. If I tried to corner him, he would run away, and I did not want to cause him any trouble. The only way I would probably get to speak with him was over the phone. It has to be a call, not a message which he can simply ignore. Sure, even with a call he can choose to hang up, but it was better than not doing anything.

However, the only trouble was getting his contact number.

Of course, I had a way to get it, but...

"For the third time this week, Nanase-san, I refuse."

That stubborn Iori just would not help me.

"Ehhh..."

"Don't 'eh' me. You've been asking this every day since the week began and I refused you each time. Just give it up already."

"Eh? Why?"

Today was Wednesday and a normal day in the kindergarten.

Since Monday this week, I had been asking Iori for Tenn-nii's contact number before the children come in. Today, I came to his classroom just to ask him.

Naturally, I did not tell him about my circumstances with him, since he knew nothing about Tenn-nii, or what happened between me and him. I never told him anything about him before, so I felt there was no need to at this point in time.

I knew that since he was the assistant teacher in charge of Sorata's class, he would have his number. Asking him for it would be faster and safer than sneaking into the principal's office to get a peek at the parents' records.

However, Iori refused each time I asked, which made things difficult for me.

"Nanase-san, I shouldn't be telling you this since we're both adults, but have you ever heard of personal privacy? If I gave you Kujou-san's contact details without his permission, who knows what you would do with it. Not to mention that he is a famous celebrity: there would be bound to be many people who would die for something like that so that they can get close to him. While knowing all of this, you should understand why I can't agree to your request."

"Iori..."

I knew that what he was saying was the truth. Despite that, I cannot give up that easily.

"I know you are not the kind of person who will compromise someone, but I'm not in a position to do that kind of thing without a good reason. Surely, you have one?"

"That... Well, I..."

As I was being hesitant, Iori sighed. "I suppose I expected too much from you. Anyway, that's all about this matter. Make today the last time you are asking. Anyway, the children will be coming in soon, so you better get back to your classroom."

"Iori, wait!" I stepped forward to grab his sleeve but tripped over my feet when I took a step forward.

Unable to catch my balance, I let out a yelp as I fell forward. However, I was not falling towards the floor, but instead on the person who happened to be near me. I knew because I felt the impact as I falling.

"Ouch ouch ouch... Are you okay, Iori?"

"A klutz as always... why am I not surprised? Now, if you don't mind, could you get off me?"

"R-Right!"

At that moment, as if it was one of those scenes in a drama, the door of the classroom opened. I turned my attention towards that direction. There, the first face that came to my attention was...

"Te-Tenn-nii!"

"Nii...?"

"Ah! Io-sensei! Pancakes-sensei! Good morning!" Sorata greeted us, but looked confused when he noticed our rather awkward position. "What are you doing...?"

"Ah, about this, I just fell down! And Iori-sensei who was trying to help me fell down as well! I'm sorry, Iori, I'll get off now."

"About time."

"Fell down?! Does it hurt?"

"Just a little, but thank you, Sorata... kun."

"Sorata-kun, don't forget to take off your shoes before you come in." Iori chided Sorata when it seemed that he was going to run in with his shoes on. He then turned his attention to Tenn-nii afterwards. "I apologise for letting you witness something embarrassing, Kujou-san."

"No, I should be the one who should apologise for coming in at a bad time."

"As you mentioned yesterday, Sorata will be going home with Tsunashi-san and Sakuya-kun today, isn't he? It must be hard having to work such unpredictable hours while having to look after him. How is Misumi-san?"

"She is doing fine, but just needs some time to recover. I will let you know when she is well enough to care for him again."

"I see."

"Pancakes-sensei!" I was listening in to their conversation when Sorata caught my attention. "Why is Pancakes-sensei here?"

"I just came to ask Iori-sensei a few things, that's all. What about you, Sorata-kun? Why are you so early today?"

"Mama has to work early, so Yuki-sensei and Io-sensei said Sorata could come to school earlier than Sakuya-kun and Manami-chan today!"

"I see."

"Oh, I have to be going. My manager is waiting for me in the car. Sorata, I'll see you tonight. Make sure you have lots of fun today."

"Bye-bye, Mama!" Sorata ran over to Tenn-nii to give him a hug and a small kiss on the cheek which was returned with one on the forehead. "Work hard!"

"I will. Well then, I will leave him in your care, Izumi-sensei."

"Please leave him to me."

"Wait! Tenn-nii!"

I stepped forward and called him without thinking.

I thought he would have ignored me and walked off, but instead, he stopped and turned towards me. However, I knew that by the smile that he offered me that he had no intention of interacting with me on a personal basis.

"My apologies for what happened last week, Nanase-sensei. I had some personal matters to handle that evening and was in a rush, so I was unable to thank you properly for looking after my Sorata. Please accept my apology and gratitude."

He was treating me like a complete stranger.

That was exactly what I was afraid of.

I felt my chest tighten because of it, but it was not due to my condition. It was due to disappointment, as well as from how much it hurt.

"Sensei? Is sensei okay?"

Sorata tugged on my pants, as he probably noticed that I felt hurt by what Tenn-nii had said.

Really, this child... I cannot hide anything from him, can I?

"I'm fine, thanks for worrying. I'll see you later during play time, okay?" I gave him a pat on the head before turning back to Iori. "I'm going back to my classroom now."

It was partially the truth, but at the same time, just a ruse. I just wanted to get away, since I felt that I had to get away before I let my emotions get the better of me.

Iori looked like he wanted to say something, but it seemed like he decided not to. "Please be careful not to trip over your own feet again.

"Yeah, I will."

"Bye-bye, Pancakes-sensei!"

The moment I turned my back to all three of time, I could feel the tears beginning to build up in my eyes. I took in a deep break before walking down the corridor, hoping to regain control of my emotions. It did not seem to do much, but it was the best I could do.

But because I was looking down and not able to look in front of me, I bumped into someone when turning the corner.

"Riku-kun, are you okay?"

"Ah, Yuki-san..."

Yuki-san was the teacher in charge of Iori's class, and one of the teachers who has been working here the longest. He was also the only Omega amongst the staff.

"Is your condition acting up again? Do you need the day off?"

"Oh, no, I'm fine. Something just got into my eye, that is all. I have to be back to my classroom, so if you'll excuse me..."

I politely excused myself and headed into my classroom.

Tsumugi-san was waiting but did not question where I had disappeared to. However, because there was only ten minutes remaining before the children come in and some things to prepare for today's lesson, we had to hurry.

Fortunately, we made it in time.

As always, I would be the one who would greet the children at the door, to make sure that they take off their shoes before coming in. Tsumugi-san would make sure they put their bags in the right cabby holes and gather them on the mat in front of the whiteboard which we use for lessons and other activities.

I would open the door, right on the dot, and the faces of the children waiting outside with their parents or caregivers would brighten up in greeting.

"Good morning, Riku-sensei!"

"Good morning, everyone! Let's have a good day ahead!"

**\- to be continued -**


	16. Chapter 6B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

The morning at the kindergarten passed as it always would. 

The cheer and enthusiasm of the class were always on a positive note as the children were brought through the day's activities. 

In the mornings, we had several sessions, which in a way are similar to classes. When the children come in, we let them start with a bit of playtime. After that, we would start with either Japanese, Drawing, Exercise, Cooking, Math, Play-pretend or Music. Of course, the children do not have to do so much in a morning nor was not in this exact order. It would just be four out of those I had listed in one morning. 

This morning, my class began with Drawing, where everyone was asked to draw their favourite object. This was followed by a combined Math and Play-pretend session, where we taught the children how to count money and make purchases in the setting of a supermarket. 

After that was music class, which was singing and dancing, and after that, it was time for lunch. 

Once everyone has eaten, it would be the biggest event of the day: combined playtime, where the children from all three classes would gather in the playroom to enjoy time doing what they wanted. 

In our kindergarten, the playroom was the largest room. There were all sorts of toys, as well as books and crafts if they preferred them. The back of the room had glass doors that led to the outdoor playground, that had several essential types of equipment such as a slide, swings, climbers and playhouses in addition to a sandbox. 

With such a wide variety, the children were free to choose what they liked. 

During this time, all the teachers will be stationed around both the indoor and outdoor area to watch over the children. Momo-san always preferred the outdoors so he would head out if the weather was not bad. Tamaki, who was his assistant teacher, as well as Yuki-san would accompany him. Iori, Tsumugi-san and I would remain indoors. Banri-san, the clerk and sometimes even the Headmaster would come over during this time to watch over the children. As the Headmaster was a good storyteller, he would usually be reading stories to a small group if he was present. 

Aside from watching over them, there were times when the students would want us to join them for playtime. 

Such as today. 

"Nana-sensei! Play house with me!" 

"Ah! No fair, Mana! I was gonna ask him first!" 

"That's what you get for being a slowpoke, Saku-kun." 

"Who are you calling a slowpoke?! I'm only asking Riku-sensei because Sorata-kun said he wanted to play with him!" 

Manami-chan and Sakuya-kun had approached me around the same time and had begun to argue over who got to play with me. I barely noticed Sorata who was behind Sakuya-kun until a little later. 

More importantly at this moment, I should stop the two from bickering. 

"All right you two, don't quarrel. Be nice." 

"Okay…" 

"I'm sorry, Nana-sensei…" 

"Good. I'll play with the both of you, and Sorata-kun too, so there's no need to fight over me. So, what shall we play?" 

Sakuya-kun looked towards Sorata for an answer, but Manami answered on their behalf. 

"House! Let's play house! I'll be the mommy! Sora-kun can be the daddy! Nana-sensei can be the baby!" 

Me? The baby?! 

"Hey! What about me?" 

"Hmm… Saku-kun can be the puppy, then!" 

"I don't wanna! Dogs are scary! And Sorata-kun's gonna be my bride when we're bigger and older so he can't be the daddy! He promised me!" 

"Ah, Manami-chan, why don't I be the papa instead? Then Sakuya-kun and Sorata-kun can be the babies…" 

"I'm not a baby like Haru!" 

"Pancakes-sensei is going to be my papa…?" Unlike Sakuya-kun who protested, Sorata looked pleased with the suggestion. He was even looking at me with eyes that seemed to sparkle. 

It was adorable, but for some reason, an uncomfortable feeling stirred up in my chest. 

"Only for today, okay?" 

He nodded, in a manner that was perhaps too eager. 

"So, Manami-chan, what shall we do first?" 

"Mmm… ah! Morning! We're gonna pretend that it's morning! I'm the mommy so I'm going to prepare breakfast so all of you, sleep!" 

"G-Got it…" 

When she talks like that, Manami-chan reminds me of her mother, Iori's older brother Mitsuki even though she resembles her father Nagi more in appearance. 

I lay down on the floor and closed my eyes. Sakuya-kun and Sorata did the same too. Of course, I tried opening my eyes to take a peek at what she was doing. From what I could see, she had brought over one of the kitchen sets, which contained plastic toy utensils, cutlery and food items. She was pretending to make breakfast: eggs that were done sunny side up with a side of fried bacon. I closed my eyes again after this, paying attention to the sounds around. 

I heard her declare "Done!" a little while later, but I was not sure if I should wake up or continue pretending to be asleep. 

However, it seemed that my debate did not last long, when I heard a loud banging sound and Manami-chan going "It's morning, everyone! Wakey wakey up!" 

My eyes shot open immediately, only to see her banging the toy ladle against the plastic frying pan repeatedly. The sound hurt my ears, and I could not help but wince. Sakuya-kun and Sorata too were shocked by the noise, covering their ears with their hands. 

"Manami-chan, stop! Stop!" Seeing how the other children in the playroom were also uncomfortable with the noise and how my own eardrums were going to burst, I quickly got her to stop, which she did. 

"Hey! Stupid Mana! You're too loud!" 

"Manami-chan, couldn't you have woken us up normally, in a more peaceful way?" 

"Normal?" She blinked at me in confusion. "This is what Mommy always does when Daddy doesn't get up in time for work." 

"Ah..." I turned towards Iori, who was at the other end of the room, for confirmation. 

All I got in return was a questioned glance, as he did not seem to get the meaning of what I was trying to ask. 

"My mom doesn't do stuff like that!" Sakuya-kun protested. "And Sorata-kun's doesn't, either! Right?" 

Sorata nodded his response. "Mama is very gentle when Mama wakes Sorata up in the morning. Mama would give Sorata lots of kissies, too." 

"My mom's real scary if you don't wake up and get out of bed after he calls you three times…" Sakuya-kun shuddered as if he had recalled something he did not want to, perhaps akin to a nightmare. 

"M-My mommy gives me kissies in the morning too, and is scary sometimes!" 

"Yeah, but my mom doesn't go around banging stuff like that!" 

"But it's normal!" 

"Is not!" 

"Is too!" 

"Is not!" 

I could only sigh. 

By now, I knew how much these two tend to argue and disagree with each other. However, it seems that it happens so often that I do not know what to do or how to effectively stop them from bickering. 

When will enough be enough for them, I wonder? 

"Hmph!" 

It looks like they finally gave up and went their separate ways. Sakuya-kun stomped off outside, while Manami-chan went to find Iori. That meant that Sorata was left alone with me. 

"Sorata-kun, do you want to go play with Sakuya-kun?" 

To my surprise, he shook his head and held onto my apron with a shy smile. "Pancakes-sensei. Ehehe…" 

This child… 

"What shall we play or do, then?" 

"Sorata wants Pancakes-sensei to read a story." 

"Let's go over to the bookshelf, then! You can pick any book you like." 

"Yay!" 

The two of us spent the rest of playtime together and before we knew it, it was over and we had to return to our own classrooms. 

The rest of the afternoon passed quickly. We brought the children out for an afternoon walk which was followed by story time and lastly naptime. When they wake up, the children would prepare to leave and sing one last farewell song before the doors were open for their parents or caregivers to receive them. 

It may be the end of the day for the children, but for us teachers it was not over just yet. At least, for today. 

**\- to be continued -**


	17. Chapter 6C

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

"Now that everyone is here, let's get this meeting started, shall we?"

Every Wednesday after the children leave for home, all the teachers and staff of the kindergarten would have our weekly meeting. The purpose of this is to update any issues or happenings with our individual classes, as well as to know and resolve any that other classes may be facing. Special events and other matters would also be brought up during this time.

This meeting is held in the kindergarten's kitchen area, and our Headmaster would be the one who got the ball rolling.

"Let's begin with the Plum class, where the oldest children are. Yuki-kun?"

"As mentioned last week, our new transfer student, Ren-kun, had a bit of trouble fitting into the class and getting used to our routine, which was vastly different from his previous school's. He is improving slowly, but it seems that he would still a bit of time to fully settle in. However, it seems that he made a friend and has bonded with Iori-kun, so there are no issues with fitting in."

"That's good, that's good. What about the Cherry class?"

I left it to Tsumugi-san to reply, as I always did. It was usually the main teacher who gave the weekly reports. "There is nothing out of the ordinary, but because the difficulty of some of our sessions has been raised from the previous year, I suspect that we may see the gap in performance between the older and younger students soon."

"But I presume there is no issue at the moment?"

"There isn't, but Riku-san and I are prepared for any that may come up."

"Great to hear. What about the new students, Momo-kun? It has been a while since the Peach class had to handle a new cohort."

"Well, it's the usual. There's still a lot of crying in the morning due to the separation anxiety, but a lot of the children are beginning to settle in well to the routine. Most have begun making friends and forming cliques, but the difference in capabilities during the older and younger ones are really starting to show. We have begun to focus on that, as discussed and suggested last week so that it will not affect their confidence."

"Excellent!" The Headmaster seemed pleased. "Now, let's move on to the main focus for today. Iori-kun?"

Everyone knew what this was about but we let Iori, whose turn it was to be in charge this year, speak. He cleared his throat twice before he began.

"I'm sure all of you are aware that Golden Week will start the end of next week. While we are closed for the week, I still intend to do our annual Children's Day event. It will be held on the day itself, and we will be inviting the parents as well. Do note that attendance for this for the children and their parents is optional as there may be some who are returning to their hometowns."

"Banri-kun is preparing the leaflets to be distributed to the parents on this Friday, so remember to pick them up during lunchtime that day."

"I understand that some of us would also be returning to our hometowns, so we need to check who is able to help out on the day of the event. As always, the Headmaster and Tsumugi-san are able to make it?"

"Of course!"

"Yuki-san?"

"Unfortunately, I won't be. I will be accompanying Momo to visit his grandmother and extended family. We would only be back in Tokyo that night."

"So I'll take it that Momo-san is unable to attend as well. What about Yotsuba-san?"

"I got nothing to do, so I'll come."

"At least say that it's for work. What about you, Nanase-san? I believe you had taken the day before Showa Day off?"

"Yup, for my annual medical check-up at the hospital near my parent's home. I will be staying there for most of Golden Week, but I'll be back in time to help out for the event."

"Noted. Oogami-san?"

"I'll be helping out as well."

As for Iori, there was no need for him to say if he was able to make it. He still lives with his family and not only do they live nearby, their establishment was open during Golden Week.

"By the way, just asking out of curiosity, what you have planned this year, Iori-kun?"

Yuki-san asked what was on our minds.

For the past few years that I was here, our annual Children's Day celebration included activities such as the raising of the koi-nobori flags and the making of kashiwa-mochi. We also had the children perform either a song or little dance for their parents, which we had already begun teaching them.

However, there was one part of the event that was different each year, and that would be the performance that us teachers and staff would put up for the children and parents. Since Iori was in charge, it was up to him to decide.

"I was thinking that we should do a play."

"Oh?"

That answer was quite normal, which was very like Iori, but…

"Didn't we do one last year when Tsumugi-chan was in charge… what was the title of that traditional folktale again…"

"It's 'Kintarou', Yuki!"

"Ah yes, that that. Kintarou. We already did that last year, so it won't make sense if we did it again this year, right? Even if the children don't remember, the parents will."

"I am aware of that. That's why I decided to do a different story this year."

Iori retrieved a storybook that he had prepared for this meeting. I recognised the cover immediately and felt a lump form in my throat.

"Oh? That story had been quite popular lately, hasn't it... 'The Sun-bridge to Heaven'... The children of the Plum class have been requesting for it for story time almost every day."

"Our Peach class too!"

"It's the same for the Cherry class."

"It may not be a traditional tale, but it's a simple one that can be performed with few people and few props, so I believe it's something we can pull off within two weeks."

"It sounds like a good idea to me. I'm in." Tamaki was the first to agree to the proposal, and everyone followed. I was reluctant to, but it did sound like a good idea so I expressed my agreement as well.

However, the final approval was always from the Headmaster. He seemed pleased with the idea and gave a firm nod.

"I like that story too, so I approve!"

"Thank you, Headmaster. Now that we have decided on this, let's allocate the roles."

Since they would be absent for the actual day, Yuki-san and Momo-san were left in charge of costumes and props. Banri-san, who was good with his hands, volunteered as well.

Aside from Tsumugi-san, who would play the role of the goddess, the rest was decided by drawing lots.

I ended up with the role of the main character, the farmer while Tamaki would be the Shaman. Iori got the role of the narrator. What was surprising was that the Headmaster, who never failed to participate in this event each year, would play the sun goddess. His usual gentle expression was similar to that of the character drawn in the picture book version as if he was meant to play the role.

After deciding everything else, such as who was in charge of which activity for the event, the meeting was adjourned.

As there was nothing else to do for the rest of the day and seeing how the sun was setting, it was time to leave for home. Once we have gathered our things and made sure that everything in the classroom was put back into its proper place, we could leave.

Tamaki invited me for dinner at the ramen place near the station and I agreed. Banri-san, who was leaving work on time for once, joined us as well.

After the meal, I made a detour to the supermarket on the way home, since I forgot that I was running out of ingredients to make tomorrow's lunch. The eggs and meat were going for cheap at that hour, so I was lucky to get them. I ended buying a bit too much, more than enough to last me until the end of the week.

I put the groceries into the fridge before hopping into the bath. I thought I would have the energy to do some reading after, but I was tired and decided to go to bed early.

The moment I closed my eyes, I could feel my consciousness drifting into slumber.

However, one last thought ran through my mind, wondering if Tenn-nii would be attending the Children's Day event. He never did before, so I was thinking that it would be nice if he could.

If he does, I will try to talk to him properly this time.

 

_"Chapter 6" end_

**\- to be continued -**


	18. Chapter 7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"TENN-san, please look over here! Put your hand on your hip… ah, yes, that's the right way to flaunt those curves! Perfect!"

As much as I wanted to sigh, I had to hold that temptation back.

No one likes a noisy cameraman, especially one who moves his mouth more than his hands. It had been at least half an hour since the photo-shoot started, and there seemed to be no sign of the session wrapping up anytime soon.

Today's job was for a poster advertisement of a new line of make-up products. When I had received the proposal, I recognised the name of the client right away, as it was one of the brands that Ryuu loved to use. As a result of that, he was more keen about this job than anyone else. However, as the advertising agency that had been hired for the task had some several nasty rumours going around, I had some mixed feelings about the job. However, as most directives were set and decided on by the client, President Yaotome decided to give them a chance.

I caught a glimpse of Anesagi-san's, my manager's, face. He may be standing at the back, where it was dark, but I could see that he was getting impatient. It was no surprise, as we would be late for my next job if this one does not finish soon. Considering the time we needed for the checks, and if necessary retakes, we would definitely run overtime.

If I recall, the next job was at 1 pm, which was a photo-shoot and interview with a family-lifestyle magazine created for Omega mothers by Omega mothers.

Unlike jobs for advertisements and fashion magazines, I personally liked to work with them more than others as the employees were respectable, humble and polite. It was a very different experience working in an environment where Omegas feel safe and be accepted. Compared to places where Alphas are the one in charge, these Omegas clearly have more confidence and pride, in both themselves and in most aspects of their lives. Many of them were single mothers like me, so there was a sense of camaraderie.

I was often invited to events organised by the editorial team. These were especially for single Omega mothers, which either taught life skills such as cooking and sewing or celebrated seasonal events. These events were popular, and Omega celebrities such as myself would attend them whenever our schedule will allow for it. Sougo-san was one of the instructors for the classes, being a personal friend of the editor-in-chief, which was how I became acquainted with them. That was about a year after Sorata was born. When I began working as a model, they immediately requested for an interview with me.

Unfortunately, because of my looks, those were the jobs that I rarely received offers for so I always looked forward to them.

TENN was my stage name. I have never revealed much of my personal information to the public, aside from my birthday, primary and secondary sex, as well as the fact that I have a child. The last was to avoid a possible scandal, but it seems that my fans thought that me being a single mother was appealing. Naturally, since he was a minor, Sorata's information was withheld from the public.

Unlike me, Sorata was camera-shy. In the past when I had just started modelling, I was unable to find a babysitter that could follow my messy schedule and fill in on short notice. I would have asked Sougo-san, but he had just found out that he was pregnant with his second child at that time so I did not want to bother him. Anesagi-san, noting how obedient he was compared to other children his age decided to bring him with us to work and look after him while I worked. Many have called him cute and adorable and he received many offers to become a child model, even from other talent agencies but he refused, saying that he had no interest.

Like me, Anesagi-san was an Omega. However, he was very strong-willed and confident, which I had found admirable. He had been my modelling instructor when I was sent to Yaotome Production's Talent School and became my manager when I was told that I would be making my debut.

Ever since he met him, Anesagi-san had always been fond of Sora. If I had to describe it from my point of view, he was like a doting godmother. Despite not wanting to settle down or have children of his own, due to his hate of Alphas, he was more than capable of taking care of my little one and knew how to keep him occupied. It was quite embarrassing hearing him sing praises of me to Sorata while I was at work, but his bright smile in the darkness never failed to cheer me on.

On Sorata's side, he was initially scared of Anesagi-san, as he was awkward with strangers. However, he quickly warmed up to him, even giving him the nickname 'Kao-chan'.

"We're done here! Please check the shots!"

"Finally!" I heard Anesagi-san huff, followed by the clicking of his high heels as he walked over to the computer.

I relaxed my posture, taking a breath of relief before walking over to where the photographs were being viewed. Ryuu, who was on standby if there was a need to fix my make-up, passed me a bottle of water, thanking me for my hard work. He then excused himself to answer a phone call, leaving the dark studio to do so.

Aside from Anesagi-san, there were several others who needed to verify the shots. There was the art director from the advertising agency, as well as the representative from the company amongst a few others. The photographer, too, came by to view his work, standing next to me.

For a moment, I felt my stomach hurl. The smell of cologne that he wore was too strong, and it clashed with his own natural scent. As an Omega, I was more sensitive to smells, and it had been making me want to gag since I shook hands with him earlier. It did not just affect me, but Anesagi-san as well, seeing how he had stood further away earlier during the shoot on purpose.

I tried to take a small, discreet step away from him. At least, if I could put some distance in between us, I would not be able to smell him.

However, he did not seem to get the hint and moved after I did, keeping himself close to me. The reason for that only became clear when I felt a hand... his hand, grabbing my rear.

I could only roll my eyes and sigh.

Unfortunately, this was not an uncommon occurrence for me. While I do not see myself as attractive or good-looking, it seems that many others do. Because of that, I have been touched inappropriately quite often, especially by men.

If I had not been working as an Omega Courtesan, I would have thought of it as abnormal and labelled it as sexual assault.

However, it was always an unpleasant feeling. Especially now, since I was wearing tight Lycra pants, I could feel his disgusting touch more clearly, as he moves it over the expanse of my butt. Seeing how it was dark around, I doubt anyone has noticed this, so I have to find some way to get him to stop without raising too much of a fuss.

I do know self-protection; Kujou-san did ensure that I was able to protect myself no matter what happened. I could grab his hand and put it into a lock; possibly hurt him enough that he would be unable to work for a few days.

However, if I move now, I may possibly end up hurting someone who is standing nearby, as we were all huddled quite close. In addition, I would like to prevent trouble, in case he decides to get the law involved. And unfortunately I was not wearing high heels today, if not I would have sunk one into the middle of his foot.

What is the best course of action I could take at this point of time...

"Ouch, hey, let go! It hurts! It hurts! I'm sorry! Spare me!"

"What is this, the coward who dared to violate someone out in the open is griping about just having his wrist grabbed? What a joke."

As I was contemplating what to do, the hand was suddenly removed from my rear. I could hear the bastard's yelps of pain from behind me, and I swiftly turned around to see why.

It seems that someone had noticed what I had been molested and came to my aid by grabbing his wrist. However, I was surprised to see that person, as he was not one of the staff members who was in charge of the project, nor had he been here earlier.

At this point of time, everyone else had noticed what had happened between me and the photographer, and Anesagi-san was the first to react with scoldings and threats. The bastard went down on his knees to apologise, but it seemed that it was not enough of an apology for having done something so incorrigible. Of course, Anesagi-san was overreacting, but I thought he deserved it.

But my attention was focused on a completely different matter, or rather, person.

"Yo, Tenn. What's with that silly expression? Where's my thanks for saving you?"

"Gaku?"

Yaotome Gaku, son of the president of the talent agency I was signed with. He was also an acquaintance whom I first met when I was working at the soba shop, him being the grandson of the owners. Being a typical Alpha, he was tall and good-looking. If he was a celebrity instead of a talent school teacher, he would surely be named the number one hot dude or something like that. However, because of the way brutally honest way that he speaks, there are many who see him as outright rude.

"Yup. What happened? Surprised to see me?"

"What are you doing here?"

Before he replied, he glanced around, probably noticing the stares and whispers that were directed towards us. "This isn't a place to make conversation. Let's head to your dressing room. We'll talk there."

**\- to be continued -**


	19. Chapter 7B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"You could have easily fended that pervert off; why the hell didn't you do anything?"

The moment we returned to my dressing room and shut the door, Gaku berated me for the incident that had happened with the photographer. In the end, he got off with two stern warnings: one from Anesagi-san and the other from his immediate superior.

"There were too many other people around. They could have gotten injured."

"Gaku, don't blame Tenn. If only I had seen it earlier, I could have put a stop to it."

"You were checking the shots, Anesagi-san. You're not to blame." I replied to my manager's comment, as I knew that the one who held the responsibility to stop him should have been me. "Anyway, the matter has been settled. Why are you still hung up on it?"

Gaku seemed to be irked by my nonchalant attitude about the incident. "You were the victim; can't you act like you care more this than I do?"

If I was not busy getting my makeup removed, I would have turned my head his way to give him a wide-eyed stare. "You mean you do care about me?"

"Of course I do. You are my fiancé, after all."

"That was something arranged by our guardians. We are just people who are made to marry for the benefit of those old men, rather than out of love or anything of the romantic sort. Plus, didn't you say that you would give up on me after I rejected you three times? Surely you don't feel anything for me anymore, so you could have refused to go along with the entire fiasco."

"That..."

"So going by your logic, if I weren't your fiancé, or rather your future mate, you wouldn't have cared. But, I'll still thank you for your help anyway."

"Hey, I don't like the way you're putting that across."

"All right you two, that's enough."

In the end, Ryuu was the one who broke up our fight.

We may have the tendency to argue like this quite often, but I bear no ill feelings or any hatred towards Gaku. There are times when I may get annoyed by the way he spoke too directly, but that was about it. This is normal for us.

I can say with confidence that Gaku does not hate me either. However, I always wondered if he still has lingering feelings for me, but I was fine with not knowing. Ignorance is bliss, and some things are better left unknown.

"So? Why are you here? Shouldn't you be teaching today?"

"I don't have a tutoring session until tomorrow. Anyway, I came here to talk, maybe over lunch."

When Gaku suggests that we 'talk', as in to discuss something, he was being serious. Judging from our spat earlier, I could guess what it was about: our engagement.

"I'm fine with it, but you'll have to wait until I'm done with my next job. It may be nearby but it starts in less than an hour."

"Oh, about that." Anesagi-san interrupted our conversation. "The editorial team called earlier to inform that they would have to delay the interview until 2.30 pm due to some mishaps."

"Oh."

"Aren't you a lucky man, Gaku, that I can accept your invitation to lunch? So where shall we eat?"

"Where's the interview?"

"According to the address, it's at a small coffeehouse located over at the next station, in the corner of the fashion street."

"If that's the case, we'll grab something at the cafe at the corner of the street. The new one facing the station's exit."

"Sounds good."

"We'll leave you two to have some time alone, so Anesagi-san and I will have lunch on our own. We'll meet you at the venue itself."

"Make sure you come in earlier to get your makeup done since there would be some shots taken for the session."

"Got it."

"Anesagi, I drove here so I'll send Tenn over later. Could you mail me the address?"

"Sure thing!"

With the makeup removed from my face, I had Gaku wait for me while I washed my face and changed my clothes. Anesagi-san and Ryuu had excused themselves while I was changing. After I was done and had put on my disguise, I followed Gaku to the cafe he recommended.

We did not exchange any words until after we had put in our orders for lunch. He ordered an extra-large serving of loco moco don and a coffee, while I decided on the shrimp gratin set and an iced tea.

The drinks were served first, and I broke the silence between us after taking a small sip.

"So what was it you wanted to talk about?"

"Nothing much, actually. I was just wondering if you had told him about it."

"Him?"

"You have a son right? Or did I remember the sex of your kid wrong?"

"Ahh..."

Aside from our guardians... Kujou-san and Gaku's father, President Yaotome, the only people who knew about our arranged marriage was Anesagi-san, Ryuu, Sougo-san and Gaku's mother and grandparents. I have yet to tell Sorata about this matter and decided to only tell him when the time comes.

"Sorata."

"What?"

"The name of my son."

"Oh. Well, I guess you haven't told him?"

"I haven't."

"Why?"

For some reason, Gaku seemed offended that I kept Sorata in the dark about this.

"I was thinking of having you meet him first."

"Oh?"

"My Sorata is quite shy when it comes to meeting people you see, and even if he warms up to them it doesn't mean that he would be comfortable with everyone. Plus, he grew up without a father and, perhaps for my sake, believes that he doesn't need one. I thought it was better if he meets you first and let him get attached to you as a person before he considers you a…"

"A…?"

I would have liked to say father, but the notion did not sit well with me. In fact, I did not even dare to think about it rhetorically. Despite accepting Gaku as my partner, I was still unable to accept the thought of Sorata seeing him as his father.

"A… parental figure."

"Ahh… I see." I wonder if Gaku had truly understood the reason behind my reluctance, but I appreciate that he said nothing about it. "I'm fine if he doesn't see me as his father. He's not my kid, and nothing can change that."

"Yeah, I know."

At that time, our food came.

We gave our thanks and begun to eat.

Despite being an insensitive guy, Gaku knows how to be considerate of others in some situations. Personally, I do not hate that about him, but it would be better if he could mind the way he speaks sometimes.

"Say, Tenn."

"What is it?"

"Could you tell me more about your kid?"

"You're being too general. What about him do you want to know?"

"Mmm… the things he likes? What doesn't he like? Little facts about him? I don't know, I just want to know more about him, I guess."

"Why?"

"Why, you ask… when we get married, I'm going to be living with him in the same house. It would be rude if I don't know anything about him, right?"

Certainly, he has a point there.

But if I wanted them to get to know each other better, what was the use of that coming from me?

"I'm not telling you anything about Sorata."

"Hah?! You little…"

"Calm down. I wasn't done talking yet. Instead of asking me what he likes, or the kind of person he is, why don't you ask him yourself?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're free during Golden Week, right? Come over to my place. I'll let you meet with him since you're so curious to know more about my little one."

"O-Oh… yeah, sure. When?"

"How does the fourth of the month sound?"

"Good. I can make it."

"Remind me to send you the address."

"Got it."

"Incidentally, would you also be free on the fifth?"

"I would, but why?"

I clicked my tongue at him. "You ask too many questions. Just come along, I'll bring you somewhere fun."

"With the kid or without?"

"Of course, with Sorata. What makes you think that I'll leave him out? That day is Children's Day, after all."

"Oh, right. If that's the case, I'll go."

"Great."

For a moment, I felt bad for making use of Gaku for this plan of mine, which I had been thinking of executing since that day when I saw Riku and Izumi-sensei… his lover, in that classroom. However, this would be the only way for me to be able to have a closure on the matter that had been weighing down on my heart. When I do, I would finally be able to completely cut ties with him.

It was an act of pure selfishness, but it was necessary for Sorata to be happy, and for him to continue living and growing up happily.

And perhaps, if God would allow for it, that I too may be able to have another chance to find and grab hold of happiness.

Riku, forgive me.

I know you have many things to talk to me about, and that I have many things that I need to tell you. But I am not going to give you the chance to do that or to know them.

This time, it would truly be farewell.

_"Chapter 7" end_

**\- to be continued -**


	20. Chapter 8A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

In order to reach my parents' house.... the place where I grew up, from my apartment, I had to take a bus and three trains. 

The travelling time took less than two hours in total, and I would usually spend the time reading while travelling. This time I had a novel with me which I had purchased from the bookshop on the way home last night, but I did not touch it at all. This time, I kept staring out of the window, watching the scenery go by as I let my thoughts flow. 

In order to make it for my appointment, I left home before the sun rose. That was slightly around past five in the morning. I had to take a bus to the station, where I stopped by a 24-hour coffee house for a light breakfast at before heading into the station. At that hour, almost all other passengers were well-dressed businessmen on the way to work. I could not help but feel that I, who was wearing my red pullover hoodie, jeans and sneakers, was out of place. 

When I reached the station closest to my home, the sun had already risen. The weather was cool and the warmth of the sun was comfortable. 

I had to navigate through the small lanes of the town, but it did not take too long before I found the familiar two-story house. 

I pressed the buzzer by the gate, below my family's nameplate, and waited for someone to answer. 

"Who is this?" 

"Mom, it's me! Riku!" 

"Oh!" 

Upon hearing my voice, my mother cut the communication. A few seconds later the front door and gate were opened. 

"Riku-chan! Welcome home!" 

Upon seeing me, my mother gave me a huge smile and a hug. 

"I'm home, mom!" 

"How have you been? Have you been eating well? Keeping warm? Have you been falling sick or anything like that the past few months? And breakfast! Have you eaten?" 

"I'm fine, I'm fine. Where's dad?" 

"Oh, he left for work a little while ago. You just missed him." 

"I see..." 

"Oh, dear me. We shouldn't be talking outside like this. Come in! I cleaned your room so you can settle in right away! You can put your things away." 

"Thanks, mom." 

"But why are you home so early this year? It isn't Golden Week yet, is it?" 

"I got my checkup at the hospital remember?" 

"Ahh, yes, yes, you mentioned that. What time is that?" 

"I'm scheduled to be in at ten. It'll just be the usual tests, and I'll be seeing the doctor after lunch at about two." 

"If that's the case, there's still plenty of time. Have you eaten breakfast?" 

"You asked that earlier, mom." I could not help but chuckle at how much of a scatterbrain she was. "I've eaten, so I'm fine. I'm just a little tired from waking up earlier than I usually do, so I'll rest up before I head out." 

"No problems. Feel free to call me if you need anything, okay?" 

"Of course." 

As mom went out to tend to her herb garden, I went upstairs. There were only four doors on that floor. The one nearest to the stairs on the left was for the toilet, with my parents' room next to it. Opposite my parents' was mine, and that left the other one for Tenn-nii. 

Since the day that we had found out that he left, I did not dare to enter his room. It was where that incident had happened, so I did not want to be reminded of it. 

However, something compelled me to go inside today. 

But before going into his, I first left my belongings in my room. 

When I opened the door, I was fairly surprised. Everything was exactly the way it was when I last saw it. The low table, the rug, his bed and pillow, even the things on his shelf and desk were just as I had remembered them to be. I knew my mom did clean it regularly, but I did not expect that she would keep it this way. 

If anything, the only thing that was lacking was the warmth of the room. 

In the past, whenever I was home, I often went to Tenn-nii's room to hang out. I barely spent time in my room as I did not like being alone. When I was around, Tenn-nii would always get rid of the rug, citing how the dust caught in the cloth fibres may be dangerous for my condition. 

On the desk, the pile of reference books came to my attention. Some of them were about getting into medical school, while others were about entry examinations. I flipped the book on the top of the stack open, noticing now neat and simple his handwritten notes were on the pages. Just like they always were. 

I never dared to ask, but I always wondered if Tenn-nii had aimed to become a doctor because of me. He was smart and really good at studying and had nothing to hold him back. Unlike me. He could have become anything he wanted if he tried. 

I actually had an argument with my parents once about my future career plans. I had wanted to be an actor, inspired by a musical I had watched when I was a child. I was insistent on going through with it until the incident with Tenn-nii happened. At that time, I did not want to make my parents worry and changed my plans for the future so that they did not have to worry about me. 

Now that I think about it, I do not remember what inspired me to become a kindergarten teacher. However, I love children and I find my job enjoyable, so it no longer matters. in this point of time 

I put the book down where I found it, leaving the desk to peer at his bookshelf. 

Like me, Tenn-nii enjoyed reading. However, the genres that we enjoyed reading were completely different. I always preferred light-hearted stories, such as those set in daily life about ordinary people, and fantasy. Themes such as adventures and journeys, heroism and justice were my favourites. Tenn-nii preferred darker genres, such as mystery or thriller, sometimes science fiction. They usually had some philosophical themes or embedded messages that I found too complicated to decipher. 

Aside from books, Tenn-nii's bookshelf also contained a lot of DVDs. They were all movies; many of them starring the famous actor Chiba Shizuo. I remember him saying that while he was not a fan, he enjoyed watching that man's acting. 

However, if there was one thing that was on his bookshelf that was out of place, it would be the toy that sat on the second highest shelf. 

I recognised that leopard cub plush immediately. 

For our fifteenth birthday, we were supposed to go to the zoo together for a family outing. However, Tenn-nii caught a cold and was unable to go with us. He insisted that we go without him, but I felt bad leaving him behind. I knew that feeling too well and kept worrying that he was lonely being alone at home. Because of that, our father suggested that I choose a present for him. 

That present, the very first that I chose for him, was that plush toy. 

I remember being hurt when I realised that he left home without it. I felt like he was saying that he did not need me anymore, that he no longer cared about me. However, because I did something unforgivable to him, I cannot blame him if he really came to hate me. 

That was what I used to think, at least. 

In the present, because he seemed to be avoiding me, I was more than convinced that he does hate me. I know that asking for his forgiveness would be too much to ask for, but I do hope that he will give me the chance to apologise. 

Regardless, I get the feeling that our relationship will never return to what it once was. The thing is, I was not sure if this feeling was hinting it in a good or bad way. 

"Riku-chan, it's about time that you start getting ready to head out!" 

"Thanks, mom!" 

Before I left the room, taking one last glance at it before I closed the door. 

For a long moment, I thought it would be nice if would be able to see Tenn-nii here again. In this room, in this house. And, if he could, he would call this his home once again. 

You could say that it was silly of me to think that way, but I felt like it gave me the courage to continue believing in hope. 

Before I left work yesterday, Iori told me that Tenn-nii would be attending the Children's Day event. It made me nervous, but at the same time excited. My wish had come true. I could not ask for anything more. 

All I can do now is to pray that everything will go on well from here on out. 

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A note on Tenn's leopard plush; it was inspired by the time Nezu and I went to the zoo because we got free passes. Now that I'm reminded I forgot to post the pics on twitter. 
> 
> I bought a reversible cushion-and-cheetah plush because it felt like it belonged in my arms, but because of Trigger I changed it to a leopard. There was a corner at the zoo explaining the difference in spots but I forgot. My cheetah is named Chihiro by the way, after Luke fon Fabre's Japanese VA


	21. Chapter 8B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

"Nanase-kun! Nanase Riku-kun, are you here?"

"Ah, yes, I am!"

"Please come this way for your check-up."

Ever since I entered my adolescent years, my health had improved significantly. As an adult, it got much better. I may still be sensitive to allergens and need to carry my inhaler with me everywhere I go, but trips to the hospital became less frequent.

However, I still have to undergo a proper checkup once a year, just to ensure that I remain healthy and that there are no abnormal changes in my body.

To be honest, I hated the hospital so much that I wanted to skip out on this. However, because it put my parents at ease to know that there is nothing wrong with me or my condition, I return home once a year to the hospital in my hometown to perform this check-up.

I was used to the procedure, so I went along with the flow of the tests.

However, to my surprise, there was an extra test. Or rather, I had one extra vial of blood taken from me compared to the usual tests. Was there a new test of sorts?

I was unable to ask the nurse, but since it was important I knew the doctor will tell me about it.

There was still plenty of time before I was due to get the results from the check-up, so I went home for lunch first. Mom made me my favourite homemade omelette rice, which I have not had in months, and I ate it happily.

With a bit of time to spare, I read the novel I had brought with me at home before heading back to the hospital.

I only waited for about five minutes before I was called for.

Heading to the consultation room that I had been assigned to, I gave the door two knocks before sliding it open.

"Good afternoon, Doctor Sasaki!"

"Good afternoon, Nanase-kun. It has been a year, isn't it? How have you been doing?"

"Great!" I took a seat next to the desk. "I haven't had any bad attacks for a while, and aside from colds I haven't been falling sick much."

"That's good to hear. Your results are good, just like they were last year. Let's hope that they will continue to be consistent."

"Right!"

"But there is something else that I need to tell you about today. I would not say that it concerns your health in general, but it is a matter of significant importance. I'm sure that you noticed that we took an additional vial of blood from you today?"

"Ah!"

It was not until she mentioned it that I remembered that I had been bothered about it.

"I'll try to explain this in the simplest way I can." She cleared her throat. "Recently, studies have shown that there are several medications that affect the production of several hormones when taken long-term, especially during childhood. These hormones in question are usually the sex hormones."

I listened attentively but was still unable to understand the implication. "So… what was that mean?"

"One of the drugs that were proven in those studies were prescribed to you for your condition since you were a child but stopped taking since you were fifteen. Because of that, we suspect that the results of the secondary sex examination that we performed for you when you were twelve may be inaccurate."

"So that was the extra test that was done today?"

"Yes."

"So was there anything wrong?"

"Frankly, I wouldn't say that it is wrong, but the test we did today had proven that the previous test had been inaccurate in determining your secondary sex." She paused to pass me a sealed envelope. "You have already been taught about the three different types of secondary sexes and their characteristics, so I believe I don't have to repeat that again."

"Yes…" I took the envelope but was too afraid to open it.

Judging from her words, she was implying that I was not a Beta, which was the result of my initial test.

But, if so, what was I then?

I did not want to find out, but I was curious.

There were only two possibilities: Alpha, or Omega.

I knew my mother was a Beta. As for my father, I did not ask, but seeing how he was like any normal person I think that he was also a Beta. Tenn-nii was an Omega.

With that in consideration, my results... no, it cannot be. I have never experienced a heat in my life.

But, the other one was extremely unlikely...

I really want to know but...

"Nanase-kun? Is something the matter? Aren't you going to open it?"

"I guess I'm just nervous…"

"I can't blame you for that. Imagine being told out of nowhere that you're something very much different from what you always thought you were. That's exactly how it is for you, so it's normal to feel that way. Take your time; you don't have to rush yourself to accept it."

"Yes, I will."

There was nothing else of importance to discuss. After the usual reminders to look after myself and the usual advice, there was nothing else so I could leave.

Of course, I brought the envelope home with me, but I still do not have the courage to open it.

When I reached home, there was nothing for me to do. Mom had to go out to do some grocery shopping so I was left alone. I ended up taking a nap on the couch after trying to watch a variety programme that was unexpectedly boring. When I woke up, much later than I had expected, my mother was still not home. Since the evening was soon approaching, I decided to take an early bath.

I did not stay long in the tub, soaking for about ten minutes before getting out. When I left the bathroom, mom finally came home. She always had the habit of bathing before preparing dinner, so I offered to help her put the groceries away so she could get in while the bath water was hot. When she was done, we prepared dinner together.

Mom managed to get prawns for cheap at the supermarket, so we decided on shrimp gratin, one of her favourites, for the main dish. There would also be a side of salad and soup.

"I'm home…" I heard my dad's tired murmur while we were just done with preparing the ingredients.

"Welcome home, honey!"

"Dad, welcome home!"

"Oh, Riku." My dad looked mildly surprised to see me. "You're here."

"Golden week is starting tomorrow, so I'm back!"

"Oh, it's that time of the year already?" Dad scratched his head as if trying to recall something that would not come to mind. "Ah, never mind about that. I'll go take a bath."

"Make sure you reheat the water before getting in!" Mom reminded him.

He grunted her a reply, his way of acknowledging what she said, as he left the room.

"I see dad's the same as always."

"Really now. It's terribly adorable how he hadn't changed a bit since we first met in college and after getting married."

By the time dad returned, looking a lot more relaxed than he had been earlier when he came home, dinner was ready. We sat down together for the first time since the start of the year, gave our thanks, and began to eat.

Mom and I chatted as we ate, while dad ate quietly. He was a man of few words and preferred listening to us talk than joining in the conversation. There were a few moments when he would make a comment or two, but that was less often than not.

"Oh, Riku-chan, that reminds me. How was your check-up today?"

Mom's question had reminded me of the envelope containing my secondary sex test results. I still had yet to open it, having left it on my desk when I came home and had forgotten about it completely until that moment. However, I felt that there was no need to mention it to them.

Seeing how torn they were with everything that happened with Tenn-nii, there was no way I could bring myself to trouble them with unnecessary matters.

"Everything's fine. There's nothing to worry about."

Is what I told them, but to be honest I could feel my heart pounding a little faster than usual. I willed myself to remain calm, hoping that no one would notice my momentary distress.

After dinner and helping mom to wash the dishes, I returned to my room with the intention of finishing my novel.

However, before that, there was something important to do. I decided to face the music and learn the results of my secondary sex examination. If I could not do something as simple as open an envelope and pull out its contents, how would I be able to face Tenn-nii?

Mustering all the courage I had, I picked up the envelope and carefully broke the seal.

The slip of paper was visible, and I pulled it out. However, before doing so, I closed my eyes. As expected, it was frightening.

When I finally willed myself to open my eyes, I stared hard at the document, and the words printed in bold:

 

**Alpha.**

 

My only reaction was to be shocked.

How could this be?

Me?

An Alpha?

Impossible.

I mean, I was not smart or good-looking or talented, which all the Alphas I know are.

There must be some mistake.

"Riku? Are you alright?"

I had been so caught up in my thoughts that I did not hear or realise that my father had been calling for me until he placed his hand on my shoulder and shook me.

"D-Dad?" I was confused as to why he was here, but when I noticed that he was looking at the document in my hands, I panicked. "T-This is, er, well, I can explain!"

It was strange how calm he was when I so unsettled.

"Relax. I am not going to reprimand you or tell anyone." He patted my head, perhaps out of habit, as he once did when I was much younger. "Shall we go somewhere to talk for a bit?"

**\- to be continued -**


	22. Chapter 8C

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

My father brought me out towards the station, where we settled into a small cafe.

I kept silent the whole time we were walking there; perhaps because there were many things on my mind that I did not know how to sort out. I knew my father kept glancing at me, his subtle way of showing concern, but he did not say anything either

"Riku, could I get you anything to drink?"

"Ah... Hot chocolate."

Dad nodded and went to get the drinks, while I went to find a table to sit at. He returned with them less than five minutes later, placing the paper cup in front of me and taking the seat opposite me.

"It's going to be a chilly night. Drink it while it's warm."

"Thanks, dad."

I removed the plastic lid to first blow on the surface of the drink to cool it down before bringing the cup to my lips. The sweetness flowed down my tongue and into my throat, and I could feel it warming me up from inside. It made me relax, and feel a little more comfortable.

My father seemed to be waiting for me to be ready before he started speaking, and I gave him the indication that I was.

"Dad, what was it that you wanted to talk about?"

"You may be able to hide it from your mother, but not from me. Did something happen lately?"

For a moment, I thought he would bring up the topic of my secondary sex results, that he had seen earlier. Him not mentioning it made me more surprised in turn.

"I met him... Tenn-nii."

"Oh." It was unusual to hear my dad make a sound of surprise but he said nothing else, allowing me to continue.

"Tenn-nii... it seems that he's doing well. I was told that he's working as a model... I didn't know about that until recently but he appears in magazines and advertisements and all that stuff. He even has a kid now. It's just... amazing."

"Have you spoken to him?"

"No, I haven't got a chance to. Even though his child is attending the kindergarten I work at, he's not from my class so I barely get to see him. But lately, I've been having chances to interact with his son. He's a cute and good kid, a bit shy but really gentle. And just like how he loves Tenn-nii, Tenn-nii loves him, too. They seem... happy..."

"But, you don't seem to be."

Dad was being too direct, but there was truth in his words.

"I guess you're right about that."

"Do you intend to speak to him?"

"I do. I really do. I mean, I still haven't apologised to him for that day... but to be honest, I don't really know how to talk to him, or what to talk to him about after that. But I'm scared that he won't give me a chance to." Ahh, this is no good. Just by thinking about Tenn-nii, I can feel the tears building up in my eyes. "That reminds me, I got a picture of Tenn-nii's kid."

I took my smartphone out of my pocket, opening the Rabbit Chat application. Sougo-san sent me the pictures that he had took from the day we met at the amusement park, but I have yet to download them.

I selected the two shot of the both of us, taken while we were sharing a chocolate-glazed doughnut as a snack, and showed it to my father. The moment his gaze landed on the child's face, there was a certain softness in his eyes that was not there before.

"I see... Sorata looks just like Tenn, doesn't he?."

"He does! Isn't he a cutie?"

"Yes, he is. Could you tell me more about him? What are the things that he likes?"

"He likes pancakes and fruits. It seems like he likes hero shows as well; this photo was taken on the day I met him at the amusement park where a hero show was being performed. He seems to have a best friend that he is very close with, both in and out of school."

"I see... How old is he now?"

"He's in Iori's class, so he should be five going on six... wait..."

How could I not have noticed this earlier?

Tenn-nii left home six years ago, in November. Sorata is about that age. But even if Sorata was one of the last few in his cohort to be born, it would be difficult... if not impossible to have gotten pregnant and given birth to a child in the remaining time of that year.

In addition, I now know that I was an Alpha. It was common knowledge that when an Alpha has sex with an Omega in heat, the chances of the latter getting pregnant was very high, and it gets increasingly higher if the same Alpha had ejaculated in them numerous times. If it was possible even for a Beta to get an Omega in heat pregnant, then that meant that pregnancy was almost guaranteed between an Alpha and an Omega. That day, I do not know how many rounds I had done it with Tenn-nii when I lost my sense of self to my instincts, but I was sure that the number was far greater than the number of fingers I had on one hand.

But that was not all.

What the man said that day when I had found Sorata lost in the amusement park had bothered me, about how our resemblance was uncanny. I thought it was natural that Sorata may have resembled me a little because Tenn-nii and I were related by blood so I did not think too much into it, but now that I recall, Iori had also asked me something strange two years ago. He asked me if I had a child, or if I had any immediate relatives with a young child that attended the kindergarten we worked in. When I said I didn't and asked him why he had asked, he said it was because there was a new child in his class who resembled me greatly. He must have been talking about Sorata.

With all of that in mind, there is only one conclusion that I could make.

Sorata... Sorata is... my…

"Riku, calm down. Take deep breaths. Do you have your inhaler with you?"

I had been so caught up in my thoughts that I did not realise that it had caused me to become anxious, and if my father had not been paying attention to me I would have gone into a state of panic, which would have led to a full-blown attack.

I had my inhaler in the pocket of my jacket, so I retrieved it quickly, uncapped it, and administered the dose.

As I willed myself to calm down, I realised something that I had failed to notice earlier, being caught up in the flow of the conversation.

"Dad, I never mentioned the name of Tenn-nii's child to you, yet you knew what it was. Why is that so?"

My father made a strange expression, one that was telltale of him having made a blunder. He took a deep breath and sighed.

"I promised him not to tell you or your mother, or anyone else, but I met Tenn once after he had left home."

He what?!

"When? When was that? How much do you know about Tenn-nii and Sorata?"

"Riku, calm down. Calm down." He paused for a while, perhaps in a debate regarding what he should say. "I only met Tenn once, before he gave birth. However, I have not been in contact with since Sorata was born. It's a long story… but would you like to hear it?"

My answer was obvious.

"Of course. I want to know more about Tenn-nii, so, please. Tell me everything that you know."

"I'll start from the beginning, then…"

_"Chapter 8" end_

**\- to be continued -**


	23. Intermission 3: "A father's memories"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nanase Daichi, the father of Tenn and Riku, recalls the time when his older son had left home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn and Riku's Father's POV**

As a father and husband, I have always done and provided the best for my family.

I had met my wife when I was in college. She was a year younger than me, pursuing the same major. We met at a mixer organised by my friend and begun dating a year after we met. Even after we began working, we still saw each other regularly. My parents, both Alphas, were initially against the notion of me marrying a Beta woman, but eventually gave us their blessings. I proposed to her three years after working in a trading company and she accepted. We formally tied the knot later in the year, and I quit my prestigious job to help my wife fulfil her dream. Three months later I learnt that my wife was with child.

We were blessed with not just one, but two beautiful and adorable children. We named them Tenn and Riku, meaning heaven and earth.

Despite having faced several shortcomings, such as Riku's poor health and the loss of our family business, we were happy. However, we may have taken that happiness for granted, and when we realised that, it was too late.

A month after my sons' eighteenth birthday, a terrible incident happened. My older son, Tenn, was an Omega. His first heat had come that day and although we had prepared ourselves for it, we were not at home that afternoon and were unable to do anything. The only one with him was my younger son, Riku. Unlike us, he had no knowledge of how to suppress an Omega's heat and was affected by it.

That day, when we came home to find our son getting raped by our other, was the day our family began to fall apart.

My wife blamed herself for the incident. However, I was at fault as well. We did not think that things would have turned out this way. If we did, we would have been more careful.

It was hurt to see Tenn so bruised and beat up, lying unconscious on the hospital bed with no sign of him waking up. However, it was just as painful to see Riku blaming himself for what had happened to his older brother, crying so hard that we were constantly worried it would cause a fit. And it did.

My wife did her best to comfort him, as she always would. She was more outspoken, while I usually avoided saying anything. In that incident, I felt that words were useless as the deed had already been done.

When Tenn woke up, we thought that it was the first step to his recovery. We never expected more problems to occur until that moment when he rejected us.

Tenn had always been a strong child. No, he forced himself to be strong. It was neither because it was the expectation of the eldest child, or because of Riku's condition, but rather his stubborn personality. He had inherited that from me. However, I cannot deny that we, his parents, had forced him to mature at an earlier age than other children in his cohort.

That day was the first time I had ever seen him so scared. It was a shock to both me and my wife to have him push us away, quite literally.

From this, I suspected that the incident would have caused some trauma, but I did not know how or why. His fear and rejection of everyone around him was, most likely, an instinct to protect him from being hurt even further, both physically and emotionally.

It was a relief when he started healing. However, he still rejected our touch, albeit subtly.

My wife had tried to convince Riku to visit Tenn at the hospital. He refused each time. While we have never reprimanded him for what happened, we knew well enough that he blamed himself. After all, that child takes after my wife. When school reopened, he went back as per normal and even tried to be his normal self in front of us. Perhaps he did not want to worry us unnecessarily, but I felt that the atmosphere around him had changed.

Most of the month of September passed with Tenn in the hospital and Riku isolating himself from everyone, including us.

And at the end of it, there was one important matter to handle.

Riku may have been a Beta... at least, according to what we knew back then, but judging from the state of Tenn's room that day we could tell that he had been affected by Tenn's pheromones the same way an Alpha would have been. The amount of ejaculate was determined to conclude that pregnancy was likely, but it had to be confirmed. However, with Tenn's fluctuating mental state, the doctors felt that he was unable to learn the news just yet.

That day, only my wife was present with him. I was at work and was told the news that Tenn was pregnant with Riku's children over the phone.

My wife was distraught. She was very proud of Tenn who, despite being an Omega, worked hard to achieve many things that even an Alpha could not. It was too much for her to take and she was sobbing as she spoke to me.

"Why? Why that poor child? He has so much ahead of him... why did something like this have to happen?"

Again, she blamed herself for this. I convinced her that she was not, but my words did not reach her heart.

I convinced her that she was not, but my words did not reach her heart.

That night, after Riku had gone to bed, she told me that she had encouraged Tenn to undergo an abortion despite not saying it to him directly. I knew that it was a difficult decision for her to make, knowing how much she valued life and loved children. However, she had decided this as a parent, for the sake of his future.

Personally, I was in the same opinion as her. If I had to make the choice, I would also choose his future over the children, but for a different reason than what my wife had cited.

People's views of sex and romantic relationships have become more open as compared to my own time, due to the social significance of the secondary sex over the primary sex. However, there were still many things that were viewed as being taboos. One of them was incest. I did not wish for Tenn to have a label as being a victim of incest, or for his children to be marked as products of incest either.

He already suffered so much. I did not wish for him to suffer even more.

However, unlike my wife, I chose not to say anything to him. I always believed that my children had the right to make their own choices. It is their life, and they have to choose how they want to live it.

Tenn did not voice his opinion on the matter. He would only listen when my wife spoke to him, but listening was all he would do.

Nearing the end of the third week of October, Tenn could be discharged,

We... my wife and I welcomed him home, but Riku did not. Forget speaking to each other; they did not even want to be together in the same room.

Tenn did not return to school. He kept himself cooped in his room, except to use the toilet or bathroom. His meals were all brought up to him, and if he did leave the room it was during the day when Riku was in school.

Riku made conscious efforts to avoid Tenn. He spent most of his time out of school either at the library or a friend's house. He did not even come home in time for dinner despite saying that he would. My wife reprimanded him for staying out late, but all he did was apologise.

This tension in the house continued for a week and a half. It was hard for us parents to bear, but nothing we did would bring all four of us back together at the dinner table.

And when Tenn left home, leaving nothing but a note behind, we both knew that our hopes to bring the family back together again were shattered.

More than not knowing the reason that drove him to leave, it was the fact that my son did not try to talk to me that hurt more. Whenever he had some troubles or needed someone to talk to, he would not hesitate to approach me. No matter how long it took for him to sort out his feelings, I would wait for him to be ready to talk. However, this time, he said nothing to me at all.

Normally I would have respected his wishes and not take action. However, no parent would be able to be at peace if they do not know the where or how their child is doing.

My wife was worried, but she chose to follow his wishes. Riku too. In fact, he became more obedient and considerate of our feelings. I, however, could not bear not doing anything. Under the guise of having to work overtime or taking business trips, I started to look for clues as to where Tenn could have gone.

My first guess was that he could not have gone far. He should still be in Tokyo or the surrounding prefectures.

It took about a month, slightly before Christmas that I managed to get a lead.

According to a close friend of mine from college, he had seen Tenn working in a soba shop in Yoyogi, which was about twenty minutes from home. I tracked down the shop and spoke to the old couple who had run the place. However, I was too late. Tenn had just left a few days ago. The couple did not know where he was going but was told that he had been taken in by someone.

With that, I was once again left to search aimlessly.

A week after that, before New Year's, something strange happened.

Along with several New Years' cards, I received a letter addressed to me by name. The sender did not leave his name or a return address, let alone a mode of contact. The letter only specified a set of instructions, along with a date, time and location.

It was certainly suspicious, and I would have dismissed it as a prank. However, there was one particular line of the letter caught my attention:

_"Come, if you would like to meet your beloved older son one last time."_

The word 'last' was unsettling, but whoever sent this letter must have a connection to Tenn, or was aware of his whereabouts.

Despite my worries and doubts, I decided to go along with it. If there was a possibility that I would find my son, I would willingly follow it.

The set date was in the middle of January, on a Saturday in the late afternoon. The location was at a cafe, in the lobby of a fancy hotel. I was instructed to present the letter as proof of my invitation, and when I did, I was led to a private room. Inside, there was a man waiting for me. He was dressed in dark colours and had an unsettling aura around him.

"Were you the one who sent this letter?" I asked him, keeping my tone as calm as I could.

He smirked when he caught sight of the sheet of paper and put down his teacup on the table in front of him. "Indeed, I am. And you must be Nanase Daichi-san. Welcome to my favourite establishment. Please, take a seat. It would surely be rude of me to make a guest stand with the intention of having a conversation."

The way he spoke was much too polite, reminding me of the elite businessmen that I often dealt at work.

Normally, it would have been proper manners to begin with an introduction, but it seemed that formalities meant little to his man. It would be more effective to be direct and go straight to the point.

"Can I trust you?"

"That is up to you to decide."

A frank answer indeed.

However, I had gone too far to back out now.

As he had invited me to, I took a seat at the table on the opposite side of where he was. This was a sign that I had chosen to trust him, and he seemed pleased.

"I apologise for not introducing myself. I am Kujou Takamasa. Pleased to meet your acquaintance."

That name rang a bell, but I did not dwell on it. "Nanase Daichi."

"I'll get straight to the point." He leaned back in his chair, undeterred by the hostility in my gaze and posture. "Nanase Tenn is now in my care. That goes without saying, the unborn children in his womb as well."

He had used words that implied little, but my parental instincts knew that this man was up to no good. "What do you plan on doing with my son?"

"Do you really want to know?"

"Yes."

"Even if it is something that should not be told to a parent?"

Was he trying to test me?

"Please, tell me."

I lowered my head down to him.

Pride is worth nothing when it comes to being a parent.

"Let me speak honestly, Nanase-san. You truly are blessed to have a such a beautiful child. I am not exaggerating when I say that it is hard to find a woman, much less a man, who could rival his peerless looks. He may be a bright child, but appearances are everything. It is the greatest weapon that any Omega can wish for, and I will ensure that I will let him use it to the fullest. After all, he agreed to do anything if it meant being able to protect his children… even offering his own body to achieve that goal."

Appearances... his own body... an Omega...

"No, it can't be…"

"It is as you think. Under my care, training and guidance, I will groom him to be an Omega Courtesan; the best that anyone has ever seen."

I clenched my hands into fists, having to bite my lip to hold back from giving in to the fury of the rage that begun to burn in me.

"Did he… did Tenn choose to do this?"

"I gave him a choice, one that he had accepted."

"I see…"

"Oh? I thought any parent would have exploded in a fit of anger upon hearing such dreadful news."

"I am angry. But if this was something that Tenn had chosen for himself, I have no right to stop him. I know how stubborn my son can be. Even if I disapprove, he would still go ahead and do it. He is already old enough to think for himself and I trust that he understands the implications and consequences of his choice. That is why I can only respect his choice."

"Despite saying that, how did you honestly feel learning about that bit of news?"

"Terrible. I despise the notion so much that I want to puke. If I had a choice, I would never allow my son to stoop that low."

"Indeed. But, I respect the way you think, Nanase-san. If only all parents would be as accepting and open-minded as you are."

"You flatter me. I have been told that my way of parenting is cold."

"It is a matter of perspective, I believe. Now, on to the main reason of why I decided to call you out today. I would like you to give your son to me."

"I beg your pardon?"

"I would like to adopt your son as my own."

"Is this also Tenn's will?"

"I have yet to bring the matter up to him. I had thought it would be important to seek your approval, seeing how he is still a minor."

"Allow me to hear your reason. My answer will be based on that."

"The work of an Omega Courtesan, as you know, is not easy. Sometimes, it has even been seen as dangerous. This is especially because of the many cases of violence and deviances that cause both physical and emotional harm. Despite that, the practice of high society giving up their Omega children to perform this role for the sake of the family still continues. Do you know why they can allow this?"

I shook my head.

"It is because the child is still a member of the family, and hence is under the protection of the family. Harming that child would mean harming the family, even if the child is one just in name and not by birth."

"So you are saying that by adopting him, you will be able to protect Tenn."

"Not just him, but his children as well. I have promised him that I will not just ensure the safety of his children, but that they will be well provided for until he is able to bring them up on his own."

"Judging from what you have said, you only intend to have him work until he is able to pay you back what he owes you for his and the children's livelihoods."

"Yes."

"Does he know this?"

"I have made it clear to him regarding that matter."

"I see..."

Could I really trust this man's words?

"Do you have any more questions? If not, I would like to hear your answer."

Despite what I think of this man, I get the feeling that he is not a person who would lie. That being said, I do not wish to trust him so easily. And, as a parent, I should have the right to make one or two selfish demands.

"I have two conditions in regards to this agreement."

"Speak."

"First, Tenn's children... my grandchildren would first be registered in my family register. They will only be under yours after, as adopted grandchildren. Is that agreeable to you?"

"Yes, it is. I presume that is your first request. What is your second?"

"Let me meet with Tenn."

"Oh?" He did not seem to be surprised by my request. "I do not mind, but what if he refuses to meet with you? From what I gather, he ran away from home, didn't he? Was there a particular reason for that?"

"Unfortunately, I do not know. Before he left, he barely said anything to us."

"I see... unfortunately, that was the only thing that I was unable to find out from my investigations. It also seems that he refuses to confide in me, so this may be a chance for us to find out."

Investigations… just who is this man, Kujou Takamasa?

"Well, now that that is decided, let's set off, shall we?"

"Right now?"

"Yes. As we speak, Tenn is now at my apartment. I have arranged for him a lesson in etiquette. My secretary is there to ensure his safety so you can ensure that nothing will happen to him. They should be done by the time we return, so you may even take him out for dinner if you wish to and if he is agreeable to it."

"H-Hahh..."

I do not know what this man is thinking, but I suppose that it was too difficult to find out even if I tried.

However, I got the chance I wanted. I was going to meet Tenn again.

I could not ask for more than that.

**\- Intermission 3: "A father's memories" end -**


	24. Chapter 9A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

As my father recollected his own feelings and actions after the incident and after Tenn-nii had left, I listened attentively without saying anything. 

I could tell from his voice how hard it must have been for him to keep this hidden from everyone else. He must have wanted to tell mom very, very badly. But dad was not a man who would break his promises so easily, and he would have kept all of it bottled up inside and brought it with him to his grave. 

However, because of what he had told me, I felt like I was able to understand what had happened to Tenn-nii a lot better. I also realised that I had misunderstood his current situation. 

"I see... so Tenn-nii did not find someone that he loved but instead was adopted into that Kujou person's family..." 

"Yes. Well, it would not have been a secret if someone had checked the family register, but it seems that no one has found out yet. I feel bad keeping it from your mother, but I have to honour my promise to Tenn." 

"So in the end, did you get to meet Tenn-nii?" 

"I did, at that man's apartment. I spent the entire trip in the car there worrying how he was doing, but in the end, I was just worrying too much. However, the moment I saw his face, I immediately knew why he left home." 

"What kind of face was he making?" 

"He was smiling." 

"Eh?" 

"At that time, he was about five to six months along. His belly had grown big, heavy with child. Two of them. It looked so out of place with his thin and slender frame. Yet, the way he touched his swollen belly and looked down at his unborn children was gentle, full of love. It was the same expression your mother often made when she was pregnant with the both of you." 

From dad's short description, I too was able to guess the reason behind Tenn-nii's departure. 

He must have wanted to protect them, no matter what it took. He chose to sacrifice everything… his own future, his own happiness just for Sorata, so that he can be born. So that he can grow up well. 

Why did I not realise this earlier? 

"More than surprised, Tenn was scared to see me. He thought I was there to drag him home. He looked like he wanted to run away and hide. He was in a near panic so I had to calm him down before I could speak to him. I don't know how, but I managed to convince him to go out for dinner with me. That was when he finally poured out his feelings to me." 

"What did he say?" 

"That, I can't you. Like I said, a promise is a promise, and it is meant to be kept." 

"I see… but, how did you know about Sorata?" 

"The day I went down to Kyoto for a business trip, I received a call from that man's… Kujou's secretary the day that Tenn's water broke too early in his pregnancy, telling me to prepare for the worst. I was so worried that I could not sleep at all, that night." 

"Eh?!" 

"I was kept updated on the situation, but I was unable to go to him. Because I promised to never meet him again, and because of the importance of my job. All I could do was pray for the safety of him and the children. In the end, Tenn was fine, but his children were not. They were born much too early, while their lungs were still weak. The older of his children… his daughter passed away only a few hours after birth." 

"Oh no…" 

I felt my chest tighten and heart sink. I could only imagine how Tenn-nii must have felt, and how much it would have hurt him. 

"His son, although weak, was able to pull through thanks to medical aid. I would prefer to say it was due to hope, but that's not something I could be sure of. But, I would like to believe that it was. A week later, Tenn sent me a letter and picture of him and his child… of little Sorata, who was so tiny. He was even smaller than your cousin who was born a month premature." 

"Did you hear from him after that?" 

"No, I did not. He made it clear that he would no longer communicate with me anymore, as long as he is under the protection of that man and bears his name. He did not state why, but he probably had a reason." 

"I see…" 

"I'm sorry to have hidden everything from you. Including the fact that Tenn had been pregnant. We did not want to aggravate your condition…" 

"No, dad, it's okay. It must have been really hard for you." 

If I was in his position. I do not know if I was able to keep everything to myself. 

"Riku, may I ask one thing?" 

"What is it?" 

"Knowing all of this, what do you intend to do?" 

"I'm not getting what you mean." 

"I'm asking what you would do about Tenn, and his… and your son." 

"I…" I did not know how to answer, being asked something like that so suddenly. "I don't know." 

"Then let me ask something else. If you had known about the pregnancy back then, what do you think you would have done? It would have affected your future, just as much as his own." 

What I would have done back then… 

I was eighteen then. I had little on my mind then, other than graduating from high school and continuing my studies. It was normal for anyone at that age. But, if I told that I was going to be a parent… 

I am sure that I would have been shocked and confused. I mean, no one would expect that to happen, especially when we were young and still in our teens. Having a child may have been something that I wanted, but not so early in my life. 

Could I have, at that time, loved our unborn children as much as Tenn-nii did? Could I have put them before myself, and made sacrifices for them? 

If I knew myself well enough, I would say, albeit with little confidence, that I could not. 

Despite that, for some reason that I do not know, I did not think of the notion of Tenn-nii being pregnant with my child as being troubling or repulsive. I mean, while I certainly did not like the idea of being a parent while still being in high school, I could not think the same way about having a child with Tenn-nii. I do not know clearly what I think about the matter, but it was not something that I would think of in a negative light. 

Why? 

Tenn-nii is just an older sibling to me... right? 

Right? 

"Dad, can I be honest?" 

"Go ahead." 

"If you had told me back then, that Tenn-nii was bearing my children, I would have wanted them gone." As much as it hurts for me to admit it, it was the truth. "I couldn't have loved them. Those children born out of love of affection, like what mom used to call us: the fruits of your and mom's love. Rather, I would have only thought of them as a reminder of what happened that dreadful day, of the terrible things I did to Tenn-nii. They would have been proof of the sins that I had committed, and would never be forgiven. I... I would have wanted them gone." 

"I see..." 

"But... I think it's much different now." 

"Why?" 

"Because I had met Sorata. If I had known that Tenn-nii had my child and ran away because that, I would have blamed the child for taking away the person who was most precious to me, even more so than blaming him for running away or myself for having hurt him." 

What was I saying? Tenn-nii was the most precious person to me? I was not thinking before I said it, but did I really think of him that way? 

"But, because I had the chance to meet Sorata, I was able to find Tenn-nii, as well as the courage the face him. I had been scared, thinking that he would definitely reject and loathe me after what I did to him. But now, I'm able to have the courage to face Tenn-nii again and to want to make up with him. This is all because of Sorata. Of course, I'm uncertain if we could return to the way things were, but I'm no longer scared of trying. Not just for my sake, but for Tenn-nii's and Sorata's as well." 

I now had the answer to my father's previous question. 

"Dad, I want them to be happy. I don't know how I can do that, but I want to and I will." 

"Even at the cost of your own happiness?" 

My own happiness… that is nothing but a small price compared to what Tenn-nii had to give up. "Yes. I'm prepared to, if I have to." 

"Even if they reject you?" 

"That is a possibility that I can't deny, knowing how stubborn Tenn-nii is. But I think it's far better than not trying and regretting in the end." 

"I see." 

"Thanks for telling me all of this, dad. I feel more ready to face him now." 

"Tenn may be stubborn, but he still has the heart to listen." He gave me a firm pat on the shoulder. "Even if he rejects you once, perhaps twice, just try again. Don't give up on him, and on hope." 

My father's advice may seem too simple and mundane, but it was important to me as I had forgotten about that a long time ago. 

Words alone are not enough to express how grateful I am to him. 

"I will, dad. I will." 

**\- to be continued -**


	25. Chapter 9B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

After we had finished our discussion, dad and I finished our drinks and went home. My hot chocolate had long gone cold, but it was still delicious nonetheless.

Upon returning home, dad went straight to bed. He had always been an early sleeper, and by the time we reached home it was past his bedtime. Mom was watching a drama serial in the living room, still bright and awake. I was not sleepy yet, so I stayed up to do some reading in my room.

I had just finished a chapter when I heard two knocks on the door. "Riku-chan? Are you still awake?"

"Mom? What's up?"

I put the book down on my bed, which I had been sitting on, and walked over to the door. I opened it to see her outside.

"Oh, I was just wondering if you were still awake and we could chat a little."

"Sure, come in."

I invited my mom into my room, letting her sit on the bed next to where I had been earlier. She plopped down next to me, in a manner that can only be described as cute. As always, she was smiling gently.

"Riku-chan, how have things been lately?"

"Great! Every day's been fun, working with the children. They're always so eager to learn, and just as much to tell you about things that it's surprising how much you can learn from them."

"That brings back memories! Both you and Tenn-chan always had so many things to tell us back when you were still small."

Seeing how my mom could smile while talking about Tenn-nii put me at ease.

Back when Tenn-nii left, the mere mention of him would make her upset. However, over the recent years, she has been getting better. At least, she does not make a sad face when someone mentions him. I wonder if something happened that made her change.

"Say, Riku-chan, you and dad went out earlier, didn't you?"

"Yeah, we did."

"Where to?"

"The cafe around the corner, near the station."

"At this hour?"

Hm?

Is it me, or is mom being unusually pushy? "Y-Yeah."

"What did you two do there? Is it something just between you guys that I'm not supposed to know?"

"W-We just talked over drinks!"

"Talked? With your father who doesn't talk much at all on a regular basis?"

"Dad just wanted to catch up with me since it has been a while since we got to spend time with each other."

"I see! Well, it's not every day that your father offers to sit down and talk to you like that, so I could not help but be surprised. Maybe his age is catching up with him."

"Mom, dad isn't even fifty yet!"

She laughed at my outburst. "Well, we wouldn't know!"

"But how are you and dad both doing by yourselves? Are you still working at the cram school?"

"Actually, no, I quit last month. Remember I told you during New Years how I had picked up knitting recently, from Granny Fujimoto who runs the handicrafts supply store? I tried making things like mittens, and scarves for little children and the housewives have been begging for me to teach them so I started a class with the help of the neighbourhood association."

"That's wonderful!"

"I'll do my best to make things for adults, so you can expect a handmade scarf for your birthday!"

"Aww, mom, you don't have to! But, why did you start with items for young children? Is it easier because it's smaller than things for adults? Or were you intending to sell them?"

"Oh, it's a far more simple reason than that, my dear. But I'm not going to tell you."

"Eh?!"

"Just as you gentlemen have your secrets, I do mine as well."

"What does that mean?"

"Hmm, I wonder. Let's just say that your father needs to do a better job of hiding things from me. Perhaps hiding it between the pages of one of his books would have been far more effective than at the bottom of his underwear drawer."

I still could not grasp what my mother had meant, but before I could ask she excused herself to return to her bedroom to rest of the night.

Noticing that it was getting rather late, I decided to lie down and try to sleep. But with the things that my father had told me, coupled with the strange feeling that was brought up by my mother's words, I was unable to do so. I tried for five minutes before eventually giving up. I needed to get this matter of my chest, but how?

I could talk to someone, I guess…

As I thought that, a name came to mind and I quickly searched up his number on my smartphone. I can only hope he is awake at this hour.

The call was quickly picked up after two rings. _"What time do you think it is, Nanase-san?"_

"You're awake at this hour? That's rare."

_"I just put Manami to bed. She refused to take a bath or sleep until her father got home from work, so I managed to get her into the tub and tire her out. What about you? Why are you still awake?"_

"Ehehe… I couldn't sleep either."

 _"Don't_ ehehe _me. What are you, an elementary schooler before his first school excursion?"_ As always, Iori was quick to deadpan me. _"Anyway, what is it? It's not rare for you to call me, but did something happen?"_

"Well… kinda…"

_"I thought as much. Even someone like you with no delicacy would have the common courtesy to send a message before calling, so the fact that you didn't mean that it must be important."_

"Were you praising me?"

_"I wasn't. So? What happened?"_

"Erm… say, Iori… Do you remember that time when Manami-chan first entered the kindergarten?"

_"Depends on which matter or event you are referring to. It was two years ago, you know."_

"I do know!"

_"Good. So what about it?"_

"Do you remember that you asked me if I was related to someone who had a child attending our kindergarten?"

_"I do."_

"That child you were referring to then… was it Sorata?"

_"…"_

"Hey, don't go silent on me. Say something."

_"Did you learn something?"_

Iori's question was an indirect 'yes' to my own.

_"Iori, do you also remember that I told you before that I had an older twin brother?"_

_"I believe you mentioned it briefly on several occasions."_ I recognised Iori's tone as the one that he used when he had figured something out. However, he seemed to be waiting for me to say it from my own mouth. _"Although, all you spoke about was how amazing he was. You never said anything else, even his name."_

"Yeah. You see, my older brother ran away from home when we were in our last year of high school."

_"That doesn't sound like what the 'world's best older brother' would do."_

"Iori! Let me finish!"

_"I apologise. You were saying?"_

"It may not be the exact reason why he left, but I was probably the cause of everything that happened. You see…"

It was the first time I had told anyone about the incident since it happened. About how my relationship with Tenn-nii was before the incident, how I cruelly hurt him and how I felt before and after he left home.

 _"So that brother of yours is Kujou-san?"_ I did not mention Tenn-nii's name at all, yet Iori managed to find out who it was.

"Yeah."

_"So that means that Sorata-kun is…"_

"Sorata is my child."

_"That is… a lot to take in. But that explains a lot of things."_

"A lot? For example?"

_"It always bothered me how much Sorata-kun resembled you, but I always thought I was thinking too much. That, and also why you have been wanting Kujou-san's contact recently. If you had told me earlier, I wouldn't have reprimanded you."_

"It was hard to talk about it back then... In the first place, Sorata looks more like Tenn-nii than me."

_"But Nanase-san, you are a Beta, aren't you? If so—"_

"Ah, about that." I interrupted him to correct that. "It seems that I'm actually an Alpha."

_"Eh."_

"I just found out today at my check-up. Is it that surprising?"

_"To be honest, you never seemed like one to me. Be it in looks or behaviour. To be honest, I'm still in disbelief."_

"Well, sorry for not being like one!"

_"Calm down, Nanase-san. I didn't mean to imply it that way."_

"Oh..."

_"So after all that you have told me, I presume that you were so persistent about wanting Kujou-san's contact details so that you can talk to him?"_

"Yeah."

_"Perhaps this is my own perception of the matter, but it seems like he wants nothing to do with you. If you remember what happened last week, he seemed to be looking and speaking to you quite coldly. He even treated you like a complete stranger."_

"Yeah... but, that's all the more why I should confront him and talk."

 _"That sounds just like you."_ Iori paused to yawn. _"It's late, so I'm going to hang up. You can tell me more when you return from your trip."_

"Oh! I'm sorry for keeping you up."

_"It's fine."_

There was a short pause after that, which made me confused.

Whenever Iori does that it could mean a few things. One, he was thinking of something. And that was usually the case. The second was most probably...

"Iori, did you fall asleep?"

_"Of course I didn't. Who do you take me for? Something just came to my mind, that's all."_

"Oh?"

_"Despite what I told you last week, I decided that I will share with you Kujou-san's contact."_

"Eh?! Really!"

_"Only his email address. But I have one condition."_

"Which is?"

_"I will have to let Kujou-san know that I gave it to you."_

"Ah..." I was about to protest and ask why but I realised it quickly.

It would be rude if someone shared your personal details without asking. Not to mention that it would be scary too since you do not really know what they will do with it. For Tenn-nii, whose face is known to the public, it would be dangerous if his contact gets leaked as well.

"I understand."

_"I'll send it to you first thing tomorrow morning."_

"Thanks, Iori. I owe you one."

_"It's a small matter. Well then, if there's nothing else, I'll hang up now."_

"Good night! Sleep tight!"

_"Good night."_

I could feel a silly grin creep onto my face, but I could not help but smile.

Finally, I got a way of contacting Tenn-nii.

My heart was pounding with so much excitement that I thought I would burst. It made me less able to sleep, but that mattered little now.

I am so looking forward to tomorrow and for the Children's Day event!

Just you wait, Tenn-nii.

I will definitely find a way to talk to you, and to make you talk to me again.

_"Chapter 9" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I've been consistently posting a new part almost every day, but depending on how much time I have I may not be able to do that for the rest of this week. I may be able to get one part out tomorrow, but I'm not sure about the days after.


	26. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

With the exception of having to make a live appearance on one variety show, I had no work during Golden Week.

I spent the rest of my time with my beloved son, taking him out to places that he wanted to go. We went for walks at the nearby park and the surrounding neighbourhood as well as outings to various places such as the zoo and a pancake cafe.

We also spent a whole day with the Tsunashi family, where Sorata and Sakuya had their usual playdate. Ryuu was watching Haruto, but he ended up getting roped in to play with the boys. In the meantime, Sougo-san and I were in the kitchen trying out some new recipes that had been shared by one of the mothers from the kindergarten.

On the day I had to work, I brought Sorata out with me. This was on the second day of Golden Week. However, because it was a live programme with an actual audience, he got scared by the sheer number of strangers so we had to leave him in the dressing room. Ryuu stayed there to accompany him so I could work without worry. After that, Anesagi-san brought Sorata and I out to dinner, like he used to.

Today is the 4th of May, the day before Children's Day.

Gaku said he would come over in the afternoon, so I decided to spend the morning cleaning the house.

After breakfast, Sorata plopped himself on the sofa in front of the television to catch a special holiday episode of his favourite series, the Sky Rangers. It was an hour-long special and once he had finished it he took a few books and brought them into my bedroom, settling down on the bed to read them with his favourite plush toy.

This apartment that we live in was a lot bigger than many others. It was spacious and had four bedrooms. One belonged to Kujou-san, despite the fact that he does not return here often, even when he is in this part of the country. Sorata and I had our own rooms, but because Sorata had the bad habit of rolling out of his own bed when he was younger, I decided to let him sleep with me. The last room functioned as a guest room, and while it was furnished as such I have not seen anyone use it. Not even his secretary.

Before and around the time I began modelling, Kujou-san had hired a housekeeping service to do the cooking and the cleaning. It was always different people taking the job so I did not remember their names or faces. It was when I had made my official debut that Misumi-san, our current housekeeper and Sorata's babysitter, was hired. She worked weekdays, so I would do the chores on weekends if I had no or little work. However, because of her injury last month, I took over all the housework. Sorata tried his best to help me too, so it was not hard to balance it with my work at all. Actually, it has been fun.

As of now, I had just finished vacuuming the living-dining area, guest room, Sorata's room and the hallway. Since Kujou-san had instructed to never enter his room, all that was left was my own.

Peeking into the room, I noticed that Sorata had fallen asleep. I would feel sorry if I wake him, but I only had this room left. I draped his fluffy nap blanket over him before beginning. Fortunately, he was a deep sleeper, so he slept through my vacuuming. After I was done, I took a shower to freshen up and changed into a new set of clothes.

I had already decided that I would bring Sorata out for lunch before getting groceries for tonight's dinner, so I had to wake him up.

"Sorata, we're going out soon. Wake up."

"Mmm..." He slowly blinked awake, looking rather dazed. "Mama?"

"Mama's here, dear." Once he noticed that I was sitting on the bed, he crawled over on the covers and into my open arms. "Come on now, let's go get your face washed."

"Mmm..." He mumbled, still sleepy, as I carried him up to bring him to the washroom.

"Now now, if you keep sleeping you won't be able to have your afternoon nap later." I lightly chided, patting his face gently with the wet towel. "We're going out for lunch, so let's get your jacket, shall we?"

"Okay!" He chirped, finally awake.

Sorata was already wearing his ankle-length stretch pants, a long-sleeved striped T-shirt and his socks, so all we needed was to put on his jacket. Seeing how we were just going around the neighbourhood, there was not much need for preparation.

"Mama, can Mr Cat come for lunch too?

"Hmm, we're just going out for a short while, so we need someone to stay and protect the house. Do you think Mr Cat can do that?"

"Mr Cat can! Mr Cat is a very brave kitty."

"I'll leave the house to you then, Mr Cat." I gave his plush toy a pat on the head, and we left it on the sofa.

After we put on our shoes and for me my disguise, we headed out.

One of the places I often brought Sorata to was the family restaurant located just five minutes from the apartment, in the direction of the station. The manager and most of the staff knew who I was, so they were kind enough to help us enjoy some parent-child time together without having to worry about the public eyeing us.

"Welcome!" The waitress greeted us as we entered. She recognised us immediately. "The usual table for two?"

"Yes, if it's possible."

"No worries. This way, please."

She led us to our usual seat, located in a discreet corner which was the furthest from the smoking area. She left us the menus and instructed us to push the button in the corner of the table when we were ready to order. The table was large enough for four, so we sat on the same side of the table. That way, it would be easier for me to tend to his needs.

I knew there was a special, time-limited variety of omelette rice and had been wanting to try it, so I already decided on my order. Sorata, however, seemed to be unable to choose.

"Mama, can Sorata have the pancakes?"

I expected him to ask for that, so I was not surprised by his choice. I would have let him, but we already went to the pancake cafe yesterday so I had to convince him to try something else. "Didn't you have lots of pancakes yesterday? Why don't you try something different? Like spaghetti or the omelette rice."

"Mmm…" He seemed to be debated about what to choose, but he eventually made up his mind. "This one!"

He raised up the children's menu and pointed to the last item on the list: cream stew. It was something that we eat occasionally at home and Anesagi-san used to make it for him as well, so it was probably one of the few things that he recognises on the menu. The children's set comes with a small side of buttered corn and a toasted bun.

"I think that's a good idea. Do you want juice?"

"Apple!"

"Got it."

I paged for the staff, and the waitress who had led us to the table bounced over a few seconds later.

"I'll be ordering one portion of the children's cream stew set, and one of the special seasonal omelette rice with shrimp with a side of salad. As for drinks, apple juice in a plastic cup for the child and a chamomile tea for me."

She quickly took my order on her tablet device and repeated it to me when she was done. I confirmed it and she excused herself, scurrying away to attend to another table.

"Mama, where are we going later?"

"Just to the supermarket. Do you remember Mama telling you that Mama's friend is coming over?"

"Yup!"

"He'll be staying for dinner so we'll need to get the ingredients."

"Ooh!" At the mention of food, Sorata's eyes began to sparkle. "What's for dinner?"

"Hamburg steak."

"Yay! Hamburg steak! Can Mama make the carrots star-shaped?"

"Of course."

Our drinks were served first and our food shortly after. We gave our thanks and tucked in, savouring the food. I offered Sorata a small bite of my dish, and he ate it with glee.

"Mama try Sorata's, too!" He chirped as he offered me a spoonful.

I would have liked it with a bit more pepper, but this meant for children so there was none added to it.

After lunch, we headed straight for the supermarket. I had already made a list of ingredients to purchase for tonight's meal: minced pork and beef, onions, carrots, green peppers and so on. I also decided to purchase items for next morning's breakfast, such as bacon and sliced bread, as well as other necessities.

However, when I had put down the basket to compare the portions of minced meat, I saw Sorata taking out the green peppers from the corner of my eye.

"Sorata, what are you doing?"

"Ah!" Realising that he had been caught redhanded, he hid the green peppers behind his back. "N-Nothing…?"

"Really?" He nodded, thinking that I would believe him. I would have to play along with him, then. "Hmm… Mama's green peppers seemed to have gone missing. Maybe they're playing hide and seek. Did you see where they went?"

He shook his head, his hands still clasping them behind his back.

"Where could they have gone, I wonder… oh? Sorata, is there something behind you?"

He shook his head again, this time more profusely.

"Really? But I thought I saw something. It must be really sneaky, so hold still while Mama catches it, okay?"

I know Sorata hated green peppers, but I did not expect that he would this much. However, I chose hamburg steak for a reason: it was one of Sorata's favourite dinner foods, and Misumi-san once made a version for him that had finely chopped green peppers mixed into the meat. Apparently, Sora ate it that time without realising it, so she shared the recipe with me.

"Ah! Got them!" I reached behind him and caught hold of the plastic bag containing the peppers. I tugged on it lightly and he let them go, knowing that he cannot hide them from me anymore. "Oh! It's Mr Green Peppers! Looks like they were playing hide and seek, after all."

"Mama…" I could not tell if the reason he had begun to tear up was due to the sight of his most hated green thing, or because he was afraid of being thought of as a naughty child.

Rather than naughty, he was just mischievous, the way all children are.

"Mama is angry with Mr Green Peppers so I don't want him anymore. Sorata, why don't you help me find the eggs while I put him back?"

"Okay!"

As he ran off, I secretly snuck the green peppers back into the basket, making sure that they cannot be easily seen. I felt bad for lying to him, but this is for his sake.

We soon finished our shopping and made our way home. On the way back, we passed by fonte chocolat, the shop run by his friend Manami's mother's family. It had reminded of the one time that Anesagi told me about Gaku liking strawberries, which was rather unbecoming of someone seen by many to be the epitome of masculinity. Fortunately, not many people seem to know.

However, seeing that he was a guest today, it would be rude not to prepare something for him.

"Sorata, shall we get some cake?"

"Can we?"

"Of course. But you only get to choose one."

"Yay! Thank you, Mama!"

The familiar tinkle of the bell greeted us as we opened the wooden door that led into the shop.

"Welcome!" At the counter was a familiar face: Mitsuki, Manami's mother. "Oh! Tenn and Sorata! What brings you here today?"

"Good day, Mitsuki. We're having a guest over later this afternoon, so I thought that we should get some treats. You aren't working in the kitchen today?"

"I was, but since we aren't getting as many customers as we always do I decided to take a break."

"Uncle Mii!" Sorata greeted him, tiptoeing to peek over the counter.

He seemed to be asking for a hug, and Mitsuki seemed to understand that. There was no one else but us in the shop, so he quickly made his way out from behind the counter. He knelt down and gave Sorata a cuddle.

Speaking of cuddles, Manami would also ask me for one if she was around, but I do not see her.

"Where's Manami today?"

"Nagi's working from home today, so it's his turn to watch over her."

"I see."

"So, what can I get you today?"

"Hmm... our guest likes strawberries, so I'll have a slice of your famous strawberry shortcake for him. As for me... hmm... I haven't tried the cheese mousse, the one with the lingonberries, so I'll have that."

"That one is a tad bit sour, is that okay?"

"It's fine."

"Got it. What about you, Sorata? Do you want to choose your own cake?"

Sora nodded and was brought to the showcase. The cakes meant for children were placed on the bottom, and many of them were modelled after animals. The variety changes every week. Today, there were three available: the strawberry rabbit, chocolate bear and vanilla sheep.

"No kitties?" He seemed disappointed at the lack of his favourite animal.

"Sorry, Sorata. We made those last week. I'll let your Mama know when we're making them again so that he can tell you. Promise?"

"Promise!"

They linked their pinkies as a sign of that. Almost immediately after that, Sorata decided on the bear since chocolate was his favourite flavour of the three. With that decision, Mitsuki went back to the counter to pack the order.

"Speaking of which, about that little brother of yours..."

"What about Iori? Did something happen?"

"Oh, no, I was just wondering if you knew he's dating anyone at the moment."

"Mmmm, not that I know of. Even if he did, he won't tell us, anyway. Keeping important things to himself is one of his bad habits since he was still small and cute."

"I see."

"Oh, speaking of which, Sougo and Nagi's birthdays are coming up, aren't they? Ryuu came over to place the order for Sougo's birthday cake this morning. Which reminds me that we're having a big celebration for Nagi this year, so I'll send you the invitations early next month."

"Oh? Even though you didn't do one last year and the year before?"

"The thing is, the 25th birthday seems to be a special occasion for the people in his country. I'm not so sure about the exact customs, but when our Mana heard that she insisted on having a big party just for him. Knowing how my Nagi is, he went on board with the idea right away. It's cute how she seemed more excited for her father's than her own, which is coming first."

"A birthday party?" Sorata, who had still been looking at the cakes, suddenly turned his attention to our conversation.

"Yup, your Uncle Nagi's."

"But since Manami's birthday is tomorrow, so she'll be celebrating it tomorrow at the Children's Day event?"

"Yeah, that's why I'm going to have to prepare that huge, gigantic cake again this year. It's finally the last time that I have to make enough to feed the whole kindergarten and their parents. On the bright side, it brings us more customers in the long run. Plus, I got my uncute kid brother and useless husband to help me carry all of that, so once the cake is made my job is over."

Mitsuki calls them that, but I know that he loves them more than anyone else. "Anyway, here are your cakes!"

"Thank you." I paid him the amount displayed on the cash register in exact. "I will let you know if I can make it to the party when the date is closer."

"No problem! See you tomorrow!"

"See you. Sorata, we're going!"

"Bye-bye, Uncle Mii!"

Leaving the shop, we headed straight for home without making any other detours.

_"Chapter 10" end_

**\- to be continued -**


	27. Chapter 11A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I mis-paced my chapters, so chapter 10 is actually standalone. Gaku's visit to the apartment will then be covered in Chapter 11.
> 
> I forgot to mention this but last chapter's cheese mousse was actually taken from the one I had at IKEA last week on the first day of the Lunar New Year. It was good.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Tenn's POV**

Before heading up to our apartment, I informed the security guard stationed at the entrance of the building that I was expecting a guest leaving Gaku's name with him. That way, the guard would let him in right away without me needing to go down to fetch him. Even if it was for a few minutes, I cannot leave my son alone at home.

Once we got inside, the groceries and cake were brought to the kitchen and put away. All that was left after that was some brief preparations for Gaku's visit, and when I was done it was time for Sorata to have his afternoon nap.

He had been reading a picture book when I called him. After entering my room, he bounced onto my bed, diving beneath the covers.

"Mama, can you sing me a lullaby?" He asked as he settled down and lay his head on his pillow.

"You really love to hear me sing, don't you? Which song do you want Mama to sing to you today??"

"Mmm... the dango song!"

"You love that song, don't you?"

I could not help but smile as I tucked him in with his plush toy. He snuggled into the warmth of the thick quilt, curling up into his usual sleeping position. After placing a kiss on his right cheek, I moved over to the other side of the bed, lying on my side on the covers next to him. I placed my hand gently over him, in a sort of hug.

Making sure that we were both comfortable, I began to sing to him.

"Dango, dango, dango, dango, dango, a big dango family..."

When I started on the verse, Sorata's eyes were already starting to close, and he was sound asleep by the time I reached the chorus. Watching him sleep made me sleepy too, and I let my eyelids close for a short while.

I did not expect to have fallen asleep as well.

It was only when my phone rang, buzzing next to me on the bed, that I woke up.

"Hello?"

_"You sound sleepy. Were you taking an afternoon nap?"_

"Oh. It's just you, Gaku."

_"What do you mean by 'just me'? Anyway, I managed to get a spot to park near your place, so I'm heading over now."_

"Just give your name to the guard at the entrance. I already told him you were coming, so you can come straight up. If there's any trouble call me right away."

_"Got it."_

The call ended there, and I turned to check on Sorata. He was still fast asleep, although now curled up into a tighter ball than he was earlier. It does not look like he would wake up anytime soon, so I let him continue sleeping.

I took my phone with me when I left the bedroom, placing it on the dining table before going to the bathroom to wash my face. The cold water definitely helped in keeping me awake. I quickly looked through the entire apartment to make sure that nothing was out of place, also catching the time on the clock that hung on the wall by the television screen: five minutes to three in the afternoon.

Just as I was done, the doorbell rang. I quickly went over to the door to open it, and as expected he was waiting outside.

"Yo." He greeted, holding out a small paper bag labelled with fonte chocolat's familiar logo. "A gift for you and your kid."

"Thanks. Come on in."

While he was removing his shoes at the entrance, I locked the door. I had already prepared slippers for him, so he slid his feet into them. I led him inside, to the living room so that he can put his bag down on the couch. As he sat down at the dining table, where I had placed the small paper bag, I walked over to the kitchen to prepare some drinks.

"You prefer coffee, don't you? I only have instant so bear with it."

"That's good enough, thanks. By the way, where's your son? Napping?"

"Mm-hmm," I hummed a reply, but he did not speak after that.

It did not bother me until I brought out the mugs, one with coffee for him and the other with tea for me, with milk and sugar that I noticed that he was staring at me. It was not disturbing, per se, but his gaze was quite intense. It reminded me of the times when I had sleazy-looking guys checking me out, especially when I was dolled up for a courtesan job.

"What?"

"Nothing much. I was just thinking, 'so that's how you look like at home' since it's so much different from how you look on regular days."

Unlike the nicer clothes I wore when I head out for work, shopping over in Tokyo and other occasions, the ones I wear at home and around the neighbourhood I live was far more simple. Today was black leggings and a cream-coloured cardigan over a long, dark red short-sleeved T-shirt that reached my mid-thigh. My long hair was tied in a simple low-knot rather than my signature twisted ponytail. Not only that, I did not have any make-up on, not even the light kind that I could do without Ryuu's help.

"Well, you must certainly be disappointed," I commented sarcastically, dropping two cubes of sugar and a dash of milk into my tea, stirring slowly with the teaspoon.

"No, not at all? I think this suits you much better than all the fancy and rigid stuff you have to put on at work."

The way this man spouts flattering words so easily had annoyed me when I had first come to know him, but by now I was well aware that it comes naturally to him. And seeing how he speaks out everything on his mind in a too-direct manner, I knew that he meant everything that he said.

"You're going to make world-famous designers and Ryuu cry if they ever hear that."

"Ryuu aside, don't you think that the newest fashion trends have been really tacky out of late?"

"I don't really care if they are; it's my job to wear them and make them look good, as long as I'm wearing them. Whether they do look good as a piece of clothing is irrelevant."

"Hoh... I can't say I disagree on that point of view... ah."

"Hm?"

"Mama?"

I was wondering what had distracted Gaku from our conversation until I heard Sorata's voice from behind me. I turned around to see him standing at the entrance of the bedroom, hugging his plush toy.

"Excuse me for a bit," I turned back to him to excuse myself, standing up from my seat to go to Sorata's side. "Sora? What is it?"

"Sorata needs to wee-wee..." It was then that he seemed to take notice of Gaku, who was staring at him.

When it came to meeting strangers, his first instinct was to keep some distance between himself and the person who he was not familiar with. But because he was already a little far away, he did not move. Instead, he squirmed a little while clinging to my leg, looking rather uncomfortable. This reaction was quite normal for him, and something that Anesagi-san found absolutely adorable.

"Sorata, Mama can't walk if you hold onto my leg like that."

"Mama, who's that?"

"That is Mama's friend. I'll introduce him to you later, so let's go help you wee-wee first, okay?"

"Okay…"

"Sorry Gaku, give me two minutes? We'll be right back."

"Yeah, sure."

**\- to be continued -**


	28. Chapter 11B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't make this on time (I finished the draft exactly at 11.59 pm), and I have to wake up in five and a half hours. I'll survive somehow?
> 
> **Written in Tenn's POV**

Once Sorata was done with the toilet and had his hands washed, I brought him back with me to the dining table, where Gaku was sipping on his coffee. He was still uncomfortable with Gaku's presence when we returned, so he did not look the least been keen about having to sit next to me.

At the very least, he was not afraid of making eye contact with him. Gaku looked rather unsettled as well, for a reason I do not know. I should remember to ask him about it later.

"Gaku, meet my son, Sorata. Sorata, this is Mama's friend. He may have that kind of face but you cannot call him 'Uncle', okay? Make sure you greet him properly."

"H-H-H-Hello. M-My name i-is So-Sorata." Wow, he's more nervous than I thought. "P-Pleased to me-meet yew—"

"Ah."

He was so nervous he bit his tongue. Then again, this was not the first time it happened.

"Mama..." The poor dear looked at me, with tears pooling in his eyes.

"Open your mouth and stick out your tongue so I can see it?" He did, and I was relieved that I did not see any bleeding. "There's no blood... does it hurt?"

"A little..."

And then, at that very moment, I heard a loud, boisterous laugh. It could only have come from Gaku, and I shot him a glare.

"I don't see what's so funny."

"No, no, that's not it. I was just thinking how cute this kid was and it made me smile like a moron. Before I knew it I could not hold back my laughter."

Certainly, he looked a lot more relaxed and gave a friendlier impression. Sorata did not seem to be so nervous anymore after seeing him laugh and smile, and was even able to put a smile on his own face.

"Big brother, what is your name?"

"Yaotome Gaku. You can just call me Gaku."

"Gaku-nii!"

For some reason, he blushed when Sorata called out his name. "O-Oh… S-Sorata, what's up?"

"For what reason are you getting embarrassed?"

"I never had siblings, so being called something like Gaku-nii feels really nice. But at the same time, it's kind of embarrassing…"

"Oh…" I could relate to that. I felt the same way when Sorata began to call me 'Mama'.

"Ah! This is from Mana-chan's place!" Sorata had noticed the Gaku's gift on the table and was pointing at it, tugging on my cardigan to get my attention. "Mama, lookie!"

"Yes yes, dear, I've seen it."

"Mana-chan's place...?"

"The shop belongs to his friend's family."

"Mana-chan's mama's cakes are the best in the world! We bought some for Gaku-nii, too!"

"Oh. I didn't know."

"If you'd like, I'll introduce them to you when we get a chance."

"Gaku-nii, Gaku-nii! Can Sorata see what's inside?"

"Sure, go ahead."

Sorata was unable to reach the paper bag, so I helped to bring it closer to him. Both Gaku and I watched as his fingers work on breaking the seal. When he was done with that, he peered inside. I, too, was curious about the contents so I leaned over to take a little peek.

"Mama, what are these?"

Sorata was referring to the seven different coloured pieces of confectionary, stored in a transparent rectangle box. It was the first time he had seen them, and he held them up as if he had found an unusual treasure.

"These are macarons."

"Ma… ca…?"

"Macarons."

"He hasn't had them before?"

"It's not that I hate them, but rather I never had any preference for them so I never bought any home before. If he did eat it before, I wouldn't have known."

"Ah."

"Can Sorata have one?"

"Just one. You won't want to ruin your dinner, right?"

"Okay!"

"Gaku, would you like one?" As I helped Sorata to open the plastic box, I made the offer to Gaku, who was watching us silently.

"I'm fine, thanks. I bought them for the both of you, so enjoy them."

"Thanks."

"Thank you, Gaku-nii! Sorata will have this red one! Which one does Mama want?"

"Hmm… I don't know, they all look so good. Why don't you pick one for me?"

"Mmm… pink!" He picked it up and held it up towards me. "Mama, say ahh!"

My son cannot be this cute.

"Ahh." I opened my mouth and lowered my head to pick up the macaron with my teeth.

I held it with one hand as I straightened my posture and bit down, taking half of it into my mouth. It was, of course, sweet and I could taste the familiar flavour of strawberry. Sorata, too, bit down on his own, letting out a pleased little sound as he chewed.

"How is it?" I asked him after swallowing the first bite.

"Sweet! Yummy! It tastes like cherries!"

"Mine is strawberry. Do you want to try some?"

"Yup!"

After we were done with the snack, it was time for the... well, main event.

Gaku had no experience interacting with children, so it was obvious how tense his shoulders were from nervousness. However, as he and Sorata talked, they began to relax. Sora was a naturally chatty child, so he participated in the conversation as much as Gaku did. They talked about simple things, such as the things they loved and disliked, about food and little interesting moment in their lives.

I was there just in case things got awkward, but there was no need for me to intervene. They hit it off splendidly, much more than I thought.

When I declared that I would be excusing myself to prepare dinner, Sorata decided to give Gaku a tour of the house. I could hear Sorata's excited footsteps, as well as Gaku's heavy ones as they moved around the apartment. They went into every room and space except Kujou-san's room, which the little one labelled as being 'the scary demon's room'.

After that, they settled in the living area, where Sorata showed him his entire collection of picture books as well as his Sky Ranger DVDs. They put on the first volume to watch, of course after getting my permission.

As I could see them from the kitchen counter, I could not help but notice Gaku's expression. He was watching the show with great interest, reacting at certain moments similar to the way Sorata would.

Seeing them get along gave me a sense of relief, but I do not feel anything else other than that.

However, thanks to Gaku distracting Sorata from me, I was able to chop up the green peppers and mix them into the minced meat without him noticing. The last time he caught me in the kitchen preparing green peppers, he burst into tears and refused to eat his dinner, even though I chose not to add his most hated green things in the end.

I was not a picky eater as a child, so I could not understand how he could hate it that much.

"Ohh, something smells good," Gaku commented while I was frying up the meat patties. "What are you making?"

"Hamburg steak. Do you want a fried egg to go on top of that?"

"Sure, why not?"

"You unexpectedly have a childish side to you, don't you?"

"Is that a bad thing?"

"No, not necessarily. I think it's cute."

"That isn't the kind of word people would use to describe a grown man. If anything, it should be used on a kid like Sorata."

"The term cute has different definitions for children and adults."

"Are you referring to yourself?"

"Hah?" I turned around to frown at Gaku, as the vagueness his reply ticked me off a little. "What do you mean by that?"

"I mean, you don't look like the type who would do housework and cooking and all that. Even though your profile on the agency's site stated that you have a kid, I didn't think that you would be a proper parent and raise him yourself. I thought that you would leave him with a nanny or something and not have much involvement in his upbringing."

"You watch too many drama serials. Or, is that how most Alpha families are like?"

"I prefer variety shows to dramas. And my mom was the one who raised me, so I'm sorry to disappoint you."

"Well, we do have a hired housekeeper who babysits Sorata on weekdays when I'm out at work, but on weekends it's just me looking after him."

"I see. But honestly, seeing you like this... doing things that a housewife does is really refreshing. Don't you agree, Sorata?"

"Mm?" Sorata, who had been engrossed in the show, gave both Gaku and I a confused glance.

"I was saying, isn't your Mama cute?"

"Mama is! Very, very cute! Just like Sorata!"

It was not what he said, but rather his bright smile that made me blush. "T-Thanks, Sora. I appreciate the compliment. Anyway, dinner will be done in about fifteen minutes, so make that episode your last, okay?"

As I plated the main dish and salad, the rice cooker beeped to indicate that the rice was done. As I had predicted, the current episode that they were watching had finished by the time I was bringing the plates and bowls to the dining table. Gaku had brought him to the washroom to wash their hands, and when they came back the table was set.

"Ohh, this looks good."

"I'm not sure if it'll suit your tastes."

"Hamburg! Mama, Gaku-nii, let's eat!"

"Let's eat!"

Somehow, it feels nice to have someone else at the table other than just us parent and child. Sorata, too, seemed to have warmed up to him faster than I expected.

Seeing how happy Sorata is, I would not mind if something like this become part of our daily lives.

"Let's eat."

**\- to be continued -**


	29. Chapter 11C

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"I'm terribly sorry that you had to witness that." 

"No... it's fine. I didn't think that anyone could express such strong hate for anything in this world, especially a kid." 

Just a while ago, during dinner, Sorata had found out that I snuck in green peppers into the hamburg patties after his first bite. He started crying and begun to throw a tantrum, making Gaku, who sat next to him, startled. It took the both us to calm him down. Somehow we managed to coax him to eat half of his portion, but he refused to eat any more than that. 

He was still sulking after the meal, so we let him be. Gaku volunteered to help with cleaning up, despite my insistence for him not to, so he put himself in charge of washing the dishes while I dried them. 

"What about you, Tenn? Did you have anything that you refused to eat as a kid?" 

"Not really. I was raised to eat everything I was served, as it would be impolite to the farmers if I failed to finish it. What about you?" 

"Back when I was in elementary school, I used to have a strong distaste for scallions." 

"Scallions? Even though your grandparents run a soba shop?" 

Scallions were one of the common toppings that could be found in most soba dishes. For a soba fanatic such as Gaku to say that he disliked them was more than a surprise. 

"Laugh all you want. But my gramps would always scold me if I don't finish everything on my place, so I eventually grew out of it. Of course, I complained about other vegetables too, even carrots and tomatoes and green peppers, but now I can eat them like any normal person." 

"The thing is, for Sorata, it has only been green peppers. Other than that, he eats everything else." 

"Like I said, perhaps it's just something he will outgrow?" 

"But the strange thing is, for this recipe, our housekeeper tried it before. She told me that Sora didn't notice a thing and ate everything. Yet, when I tried it... well, his reaction was just as you have witnessed." 

"Don't let that get you down." 

"Yeah, I won't. Thanks." 

"But no matter how I see it, you're spoiling him too much. He's going to start elementary school soon, isn't he? He's still referring to himself in the third person and is still behaving like a child younger than his age." 

"I know." 

"You don't." 

"No, I really do. But at the very least, I still want to spoil him while he's still young when I still can." 

"What does that mean?" 

"Hmm, I wonder." I put down the last of the dishes that were washed and dried on the counter, to be put away back to the cupboard later in the evening. "Come, let's have dessert. Gaku, could you help me get the cake?" 

Gaku agreed, and I went to pacify Sorata, who was curled up on the dining chair. 

He apologised for not finishing his dinner, but not for throwing a tantrum. I left it as that and cheered him up with the prospect of cake, which was brought over just as I had mentioned it. 

"Speaking of which, Gaku, you're staying over tonight, aren't you?" 

"Well, of course, you were the one who invited me." 

"A sleepover?" That was Sorata's conclusion to our conversation. "Gaku-nii's staying with us?" 

"Just for tonight." 

"Will Gaku-nii be sleeping with Mama and Sorata?" 

I knew that it was a completely innocent question, but as adults, Gaku and I thought of something else. That was why his reaction was expected. 

"N-No, of course not!" Gaku spluttered, his face reddening. 

"Sora, Gaku will be sleeping in the guest room tonight. Look at how big he is. How do you expect him to fit in the same bed?" 

"Aww..." 

"In exchange, why don't you take your bath with him?" 

"Eh?!" Gaku seemed even more surprised at my suggestion. "Me, with the kid?!" 

"Of course. Take it as a way of fostering kinship or something. What do you think, Sorata? Would you like to take a bath with Gaku-nii?" 

"Yes!" 

"Well, then that's settled. I'll get the bath running, so the both of you can get in when it's done." 

After finishing the cake, I went to draw the bath. When I returned, I caught Gaku doing the cleaning up while chatting with Sorata, who was helping him wipe the dishes dry. I was about to tell him off for doing unnecessary things, but it was also a relief to have another pair of hands. 

Gaku had left his bag on the sofa since he came in, so he brought it with him into the guest room. 

"Your tub is big enough for the three of us," Gaku made a suggestion as I brought him into the room, where Sorata could not hear us. "Why don't you get in too?" 

"I'll pass, thanks. I don't want to defile Sorata's eyes with the sight of your ugly boner in the bath that is sure to pop when you see me naked." 

"Hey!" 

"Well then. Go get your clothes. I'm going to get Sorata's." 

I left Sorata to Gaku in the bathroom, where I realised that I forgot to leave him a bath towel to use. When I came back, they were already inside. However, I overheard something amusing. 

"Gaku-nii's pee-pee is bigger than Mama's!" 

I could not help but laugh out loud at that. It seems that they could hear me from inside, as Gaku yelled out a protest. 

"Oi, Tenn, you don't have to laugh so hard!" 

While waiting for them to be done, I put the dishes back into the cupboard and finished cleaning up the living and dining room. I also took out the hair dryer and plugged it into a socket in the living room, so that I could help Sorata dry his hair later. 

However, Gaku insisted that he would take care of Sorata and chased me to take my own bath. 

That was something I did not expect. However, since he proved himself more than capable of looking after Sora, I was willing to agree. 

Normally, I would have taken a longer bath if I was with Sorata. But since I was alone, there was no reason for me to stay in the tub so long. Unlike my little one, I was not good with the heat, so I would get giddy when I stay in the water too long. That was part of the reason why I asked Gaku to bathe with Sorata, but I had truly intended to test him to see if he can be entrusted with my son. 

Surprisingly, he was doing better than I expected for someone who had no experience with handling children. 

I have yet to tell Sorata about our engagement, but at least I know that I no longer have to worry not being able to trust Gaku with him. 

When I hopped out of the bathroom, they were done with the hair dying and Gaku was reading him a story. Unfortunately, he was not very good at it, but Sorata was already nodding off so that mattered little. 

"Gaku." 

"Oh, you're out." 

"Yeah. I have something to discuss with you, but I'll need to put Sorata to bed first. Could you wait for me?" 

"Got it." 

"Gaku-nii, nighties..." Sorata waved to him after I carried him up into my arms. "See you tomorrow." 

"Good night, kiddo." Gaku patted his hair gently. "Sweet dreams." 

When I tucked him in, Sorata had already fallen asleep. He must have tired himself out playing with Gaku and crying over the green peppers. With this, he would be sound asleep until morning. 

And with that assurance, it was time to put my plans into action. 

First, I took a peek into the living-dining area. It was vacant, which meant that Gaku had listened to my request. I made sure that all unused electrical appliances were turned off before switching off the lights of the hallways. 

I silently returned to my room to make preparations for my plans. I had prepared a certain set of clothing which I had hidden beforehand and brought it to the bathroom to change. I left the current set of clothes I had been wearing, my pyjamas and underpants, just in case I needed to change later in the night. 

I turned off the rest of the lights after that and made my way to the guest room. 

I knocked twice before turning the doorknob to enter. 

"Oi, what took you so... long..." 

Initially, Gaku sounded rather pissed before he turned around to face me, but when he saw what I was wearing he made a silly face. His jaw was hanging open, and his eyes were wide with shock. 

"Like what you see?" 

"What are you wearing?!" 

"A babydoll?" 

"I can see it's a babydoll, but why are you wearing it?" 

"Isn't it obvious?" I sighed, closing the door behind me as I sauntered to the bed, which he was sitting on. 

Straddling him, I wrapped my arms around his neck and rubbed my ass against him. He was wearing shorts, so the only thing separating the skin of his lap and my bottom was the thin black lace panties that came with the translucent babydoll. 

If you were wondering why I had something like this, it had been a gift from a previous client. 

I leaned forward so that our chests can touch. With the distance between our bodies closed, I took his lips and kissed him. I thought he would resist and push me away, but he was surprisingly docile. 

Using my own weight, I pushed Gaku backwards, so that his back was against the mattress. 

"Tenn..." 

"What happened, cat got your tongue? You wanted to do this kind of things with me from the start, didn't you? Or did you think that I would invite you over without any hidden intentions?" 

"But Sorata..." 

"Once he falls asleep, he won't wake up until morning. We got plenty of time, so there's no need to rush. Or what, you are telling me that you don't want this?" 

"It's not that..." 

"Well, of course. You're already starting to get quite hard down there and I haven't even done anything yet. What are you, a virgin?" 

"Is that a bad thing?" 

"Seriously?" 

"What?" 

"You haven't done it before?" 

"Of course. Do I look like a frivolous skirt chaser to you?" 

"Well, you have the aura of a Casanova. And with that face, I'm sure anyone and everyone would bow down at your feet offering themselves up to you. Attracting poor innocents without lifting so much as a finger and doing perverted things as and when you wish... aren't you Alphas all like that?" 

I must have said something to tick him off because he moved suddenly, switching our positions. Now I was the one below him, and he was the one pinning me down on the bed. 

Despite looking a little irritated, the expression on his face was rather erotic, and I felt my heart skip a beat. But, just for one moment. 

"Hey. Don't you dare make assumptions about me just because of what I am; I hate it when people do that." 

"Why don't you teach me more about you, then? The night is still young, and like I said we got all the time in the world. Since you are about to graduate from your status as a virgin, let's make this a night to remember." 

"Very well. If you want it that badly, I'll give it to you. You won't be getting much sleep tonight." 

"That should be my line." 

That night was the first time I had sex with anyone by my own violation. Gaku, despite saying that he would not be able to hold back, was surprisingly gentle. However, I did not sleep with him because I wanted to, or out of any special feelings for him. 

This was a necessary measure. 

Just one step that is required for me to require my desired outcome. 

Personally, I could only feel sorry for Gaku, who is a puppet on a string. He is only doing what I will him to do, without realising it. 

I may have accepted him, but I am still unsure if I could love him. 

But, he loves me. 

And, he cares for Sorata. 

That is why I could only feel guilt towards him, as my affections still belong to another person. Despite deciding to say farewell, I know that my heart still cannot let him go. 

How contradictory. 

How laughable. 

Humans are such fickle and selfish creatures. 

And I cannot deny that I, too, am one of them. 

_"Chapter 11" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm taking a small break from writing. A certain incident happened in regards to my latest work (which I'm avoiding at the moment because I can't handle it at the moment) which had made me mentally and emotionally tired. That and I need to focus on my day job since that is also a major cause of stress so I'm going to disappear for about a few days. Should be back with chapter 12 once all of that settles. 
> 
> Thanks for your understanding.


	30. Chapter 12A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

Today was finally Children's Day.

I will get to meet Tenn-nii again, at the event. I was so excited that I woke up much too early this morning.

When I had finally received his email address, I had been too nervous to use it. Despite drafting a few messages to him, I have yet to send any of them. But rather than messages, I felt that it would be better for me to convey what I wanted to tell him in my own words, with my own voice.

In the end, I sent him one message late last night before I slept.

_I want to talk to you._

He had yet to reply to it. Perhaps he was already asleep at that hour and had not woken up when I was preparing to leave home.

I thought I would be the first person to reach the school this morning, but Iori had arrived a little before me. He was entrusted with the keys, and thus felt the responsibility to be the first one there.

While waiting for everyone else to arrive, we started on the last of the preparations for the event. When they did, we held a small briefing on our roles for the day. As we were already familiar with the itinerary there was no need for us to go through it a second time, so we had a brief run-through.

I was put in charge of the registration booth. I had wanted to help out with the setting up of the play, but Iori declared me a klutz and refused to let me be involved.

Out of the eighty-seven families whose children our kindergarten cares for, only forty-two of them had registered for the event. We received a call before this morning's briefing that one would be unable to attend, as the child had come down with the flu, so that is one more less.

However, seeing how many families have either travelled overseas or gone back to their hometown for the holidays, this number was more than what we had last year.

The event was due to start at ten, so we intended to open registration at nine-thirty. However, just as I was setting up the registration counter with Banri-san, I saw a delivery van pull up at the gates and recognised it as the one belonging to Iori's family's business.

"Nana-sensei!" Manami called out to me once she hopped out from the front, running towards me with her arms stretched out for a hug.

"Good morning, Manami-chan!"

"Mana!" I heard his mother, Mitsuki, call out from the driver's seat. "Don't just play with Riku; you were supposed to get your Uncle Iori to help with the cake!"

"Iori-kun is busy with something at the moment, shall I help instead?" Banri-san, who had just brought out the printouts to be given to the families regarding today's activities, offered to help when I was about to.

"That'll be great, Oogami-san! I really appreciate it!"

"Oh, Mitsuki! How cold-hearted you are, asking for another man's help when you got your beautiful and loyal husband here to answer to your every whim..."

"The last time I let you help, the cake I spent hours to make got completely ruined! I'm not going to let you ruin another one, especially not our daughter's! You are in charge of registering us in while I head back to park the car, got it?"

"Yes, my dear!" Nagi saluted, in an almost-too comical fashion as always, and made his way towards me.

"Good morning, Nagi!"

"Hello, Riku. The colour on your face looks wonderful today. Did something good happen?"

"I guess you can say that!" After checking their name off the list, I handed him a marker and the stickers, for him to write his family's names on. These would be pasted on their chest to help both the children and parents of the different cohorts get better acquainted with each other.

"Nana-sensei! Look!" Manami-chan twirled around once to show me her dress. "Isn't it pretty? My granny made it for me! It looks just like Kokona's, doesn't it?"

"It does! Your grandmother's handmade dresses are always so pretty!"

"Aren't they?"

"Manami," After completing the registration, Nagi called for her, proceeding to speak to her in his country's language.

It never fails to surprise me how Manami-chan was able to understand what he was saying and reply him fluently. Nagi had been teaching her ever since she learnt to babble, something I had noticed when I visited them every now and then, ever since I moved here. According to Mitsuki, he had been teaching her English too, which is really amazing for a child her age.

I mean, even now, my English was terrible. Then again, I do not use it regularly and have not had to since I finished high school, so it was probably understandable.

"Nana-sensei, we're going in to find Uncle Iori, so we'll see you later!"

"See you later, Riku."

"I'll catch you both later!"

As I waved them goodbye, another family arrived and more followed soon after.

Amongst them was the Tsunashi family. All four of them attended today's session. I was introduced to Sougo-san's husband and mate, who preferred to be referred to as 'Ryuu', his nickname. Unlike the beautiful Sougo-san, Ryuu-san was tall and well-built, the kind of muscular, toned figure that you would see featured on the cover of Alpha men's magazines.

After registering and putting on the sticker labels, the families were directed to the playroom to wait for the event to start.

Most families had arrived and settled in about fifteen minutes before the event was due to start. There were two families who called in to inform that they were unable to make it last-minute. Banri-san, who was in the office, had told me about this. That meant that the number remaining was as few as the number of fingers on both my hands.

I did not need to run through the list to know that the Kujou family were one of them.

However, what worried me was that the list indicated that three people from their family had been registered.

Sorata was definitely one of the three.

Presuming that the second was Tenn-nii, who could the last person be?

Could it be that person dad told me about, the man who took Tenn-nii in and adopted him? But a strange feeling told me that it would not be him. The way dad described him, he did not seem to be the kind of person who would attend this sort of events.

If so, who could it be?

"Riku-kun, we're going to start in ten minutes!"

"Understood, Banri-san!"

That was the signal to start closing the counter in five minutes and head in.

It was not like Tenn-nii to be this late. I wonder if something had happened to them on the way here…

"Pancakes-sensei!"

I had been too preoccupied with my thoughts when a familiar voice came to my attention. When I looked up, I saw Sorata running to me with his arms stretched out. I could not help but smile as I stood up, going around the table to greet him.

"Sorata-kun!"

"Sensei!" I had bent down and opened my arms for him, and he leapt into them for a hug.

His scent, a light jasmine fragrance tinted with honey, wafted up to my nose. That and the warmth of his small body was comforting, giving me a warm, fuzzy feeling in my chest.

Sorata... my son... mine and Tenn-nii's...

I could feel my heart begin to pound fast in my chest from the joy of that knowledge. If this was not the kindergarten, I would have let out tears of happiness.

"Sensei, good morning!" He greeted me after I put him down.

"Good morning, Sorata-kun! Where's your Mama?"

"Mama's behind, with Gaku-nii!"

"Gaku... nii?"

Who is that?

"Ah! Mama! Over here!"

I looked up, and indeed Tenn-nii was there. I could recognise him even with his disguise of glasses and a hat. Next to him was a tall man who seemed familiar. He must be the person whom Sorata addressed as 'Gaku-nii'. But, where have I seen him before...

Ah!

The amusement park! He was that rude guy Sorata bumped into!

And judging by the surprised, wide-eyed stare he gave me, he seemed to recognise me as well.

"Good morning. I hope we are not too late." Tenn-nii spoke to me, but in a tone and manner that felt cold and distant. "Sorata, Mama and Gaku-nii will do the registration; why don't you go in and find Sakuya-kun first?"

"Okay!"

With Sorata gone, the silence was awkward. Tenn-nii ignored the tension in the air as he begun to write their names on the sticker labels I had passed to him, while the other man and I were left unsure of what to do.

In the end, I decided to break the silence.

"U-Um! You were at the amusement park, weren't you? That time when Sorata-kun bumped into you..."

"Ah... yeah, I was. It seemed that I had misunderstood the situation back then. The both of you look so similar that I just assumed that Sorata was yours... please accept my sincere apologies."

"Ahh, it's fine. I would suppose that anyone in that situation would make the same conclusion as you did. Ah, I'm Nanase Riku. I work as a teacher here in this kindergarten." I extended my hand out to him for a handshake, which he reciprocated. "Pleased to meet you."

"Nana... se...?" He frowned, looking towards Tenn-nii who did not seem to notice his gaze at all.

"Is something the matter?"

"Ah, no, it's nothing. The name's Yaotome Gaku. I work as an etiquette instructor in a talent school. The pleasure's mine."

"Erm, if you don't mind me asking, what is your relationship with Te... Kujou-san?"

"Ah, Tenn's my—"

"Gaku is my fiancé." Tenn-nii interrupted, finally raising his head to look at me. "We have known each other for a long time, and will be getting married later this year. I will send you an invitation when the date is confirmed."

… Eh?

Fiancé?

Married?

Tenn-nii… and this guy?

What?

Why?

"What is the meaning of this, Tenn-ni—"

"Riku-kun, we're going to start soon! Please gather inside with everyone else!"

"R-Right…"

"Come, Gaku, let's go in."

"Are you sure? He looked like he had something to say to you."

"It's fine. Well then, we shall excuse ourselves here, Nanase-sensei." Tenn-nii pulled Yaotome-san away by the hand before I could say or do anything else.

At that moment, I could not do anything. I felt like my hopes and excitement, that had built up over the past few days, were crushed completely with just that one announcement. My heart seemed to sink deeper into my chest and I could feel my confidence and willpower wavering. Perhaps that it was because it was Tenn-nii that had said it himself that it made me feel worse than I should have.

It was an unpleasant feeling that I could not describe, but if it is one thing that I do know is that I do not like the idea at all.

But, why?

I should be happy for him, right?

I mean, he was able to find someone whom he loves... and that Sorata likes, too. Despite what happened at the amusement park, Yaotome-san seems like a good person who will cherish Tenn-nii and look after Sorata.

It was a good thing. It was supposed to be.

Yet I hated the sound of it.

For a moment, a nasty thought ran through my mind and I wanted to yell it out. That I was against Tenn-nii marrying him, and that I did not want to let anyone have him.

But why?

I cannot understand.

What is the right thing to do, in this situation?

**\- to be continued -**


	31. Chapter 12B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

Despite the uneasy and unpleasant feeling that had built up in my chest, I still have to continue working.

At the playroom, the principal gave a short speech, welcoming the children and their family and thanking them for taking time to participate in their event. After a brief introduction about children's day, he passed the microphone to Iori who started going through the itinerary that I had given out to each family earlier.

The first was the raising of the carp flags. Aside from the actual ones to be raised on a high flagpole, there was an empty wall in the playroom where the children could put up their hand-coloured paper ones with sticky tack. These were done in class on the last day before Golden Week, and those who were present had theirs set aside just for this activity.

After that was story-telling. Each of the teachers had a copy of the book, with a respective character to voice out. We accompanied the story with some exaggerated movements, encouraging the children to do them with us, and changed our voices to suit our role.

The group was then moved to the kitchen area where there was the making of kashiwa-mochi, supervised by Tsumugi-san and Banri-san, which was followed by lunchtime. During this time, we teachers snuck in a rehearsal session for the play after taking a quick meal of rice balls, prepared by Banri-san earlier this morning.

After lunch, the parents and children were split up. The children were brought to a classroom to rehearse their little performance for their parents, while the parents were tasked to make a thank you card for their children. The parents would later be brought into the room where the children are, and after each class had performed their piece, they returned to their parents and were given that card.

To wrap up, it was finally time for the teachers to perform.

At that time, I was still feeling down because of what happened with Tenn-nii. During the rehearsal, it affected my acting and I got soundly scolded by Iori because of that. Fortunately, for the actual performance, I forced myself to abandon my thoughts and give a good performance. It seemed to work well, as I received many praises from the children and their parents.

We were supposed to end the event after that, but there was still one last thing: Manami-chan's birthday party. That was to be held in the kitchen area. However, the teachers had to put aside the props and our costumes first, before going over.

When we went over, I could not help but notice that Tenn-nii was missing. Yaotome-san was chatting with Sougo-san's husband, while Sorata was with Sakuya-kun and Manami-chan. However, I was unable to spot Tenn-nii at all.

Just as I was wondering where he could have gone, I felt my smartphone buzz in the back pocket of my jeans. To my surprise, it was from Tenn-nii.

_"You said you wanted to talk. I'll be waiting for you in the next room."_

I would have been happy if I saw this earlier, but after what happened in the morning I had nothing but mixed feelings.

But this was a chance... perhaps my last. I need to take it, since I may never have another.

"Sorry, Iori, I got to step out for a while!"

"For what?"

"Errr, toilet!"

Iori looked like he had more to say, but I had run off without giving him the chance to.

The kitchen area was located in between two rooms: the large playroom and my classroom, where we held our performance earlier. Logically, when Tenn-nii meant 'the next room', it could not have been that, which means he was in the first of the two.

And I was right.

When I entered, I noticed that he was standing in the corner by the bookshelves, with his back against the wall.

I approached him silently and slowly, unable to get rid of the bitter and awkward feeling in my throat.

"Speak. I'll listen to what you have to say."

"Tenn-nii..." I began but was not sure how to continue.

"... You're still calling me by that name?"

"Of course. I mean, to me, Tenn-nii is still Tenn-nii, after all..."

It was uncomfortable. Although we were standing so close to each other, it feels that he is so far away.

Now that I look at him, he seems so much more of an adult compared to myself. Despite not having changed much in appearance, he definitely has a more mature aura around him. Also, he was very, very beautiful... as expected of him who is a model.

"Are you done? If not, I'll be returning back to where everyone else is."

"No!" I cannot let him leave. Not when I have yet to say anything. "I'm sorry, I just need some time to sort out my thoughts and everything, I mean, it has been so long since we got to talk and all..."

I was blabbering nonsense. What should I start with? What is good to start with?

I guess I should start by breaking the ice.

"How... How have you been doing lately?"

"Fine, thank you."

If Tenn-nii's intention was to make me give up speaking to him, he was doing it well. However, I cannot back down now.

I should get straight to the point.

"Tenn-nii, I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"You know, that day..."

"It's not your fault. Why apologise?"

"It is my fault. I mean, if I didn't lose control of myself, none of this would have happened."

"I said, it's not your fault. Anyway, that is a matter of the past. It's not like doing anything in the present can change that."

"You're right... I'm sorry."

"You're apologising again."

"... It's a bad habit." Tenn-nii, have you come to hate me so much that you do not want to speak to me anymore? "So... you're really getting married to Yaotome-san?"

I regret asking that, as I had let it out of my mouth the moment I thought of the matter. There should have been a proper order in what I wanted to ask, but I was feeling so troubled that it had jumbled up.

"Yes, I intend to."

"Do you love him?"

"... Of course, I do. Why would I choose to marry him if I didn't?"

"What does Sorata think about it?"

"I haven't told him."

"What?"

"This is a matter that only concerns us, adults. He doesn't need to know about it until everything has been settled."

I do not know if Tenn-nii was stating his true opinion, or it was a ruse to throw me off the topic. However, I could not help but to feel angry by how he had phrased it.

"How can you say that it doesn't concern him? If you get married, that means that Yaotome-san will become that child's father! For that child, this is something that will change is his life, and you dare say that it doesn't concern him? That's nonsense!" I certainly let my anger get the better of me, and I lashed out at Tenn-nii. "If you love him, won't you care how he feels about this? Won't you even try to talk to him about this at all? I think that this is very irresponsible of you!"

"You're speaking too loud. Keep your voice down or they will be able to hear us in the other room." For the first time since we began our conversation, Tenn-nii finally looked at me in the eye, but only to deliver a sharp glare. "I am his parent, and the decision is mine to make. In what position are you to decide what I should do? Learn your place as an outsider."

Me? An outsider?

How could he say that?

"I believe I do have a right to have a say in this matter." After all, that child is… "Sorata is my son. You may be the one who gave birth to and raised him, but I want him to be happy as much as you do."

Tenn-nii remained silent for a few seconds. His expression was unreadable, but he had raised his hand to touch his face: his old habit that hinted that he was feeling troubled over something. "So you know."

"Yeah."

"Did dad tell you?"

I shook my head. "Not directly. The hints had been around me all this time. I simply connected the dots."

"But, so what if you do know? Tell me, what have you done for this child that allows you to claim him as yours? If you think that you deserve to be called his father, you are wrong. That child never had a father, to begin with. He only had me since the day he was born, and I believe it would be better if things stayed that way."

I could not say anything in reply or retort to that, as I knew that what he said was right. I have never been a parent to Sorata… I have no right to act like I did, too.

How silly I was.

I had believed that Tenn-nii was the kind and gentle Tenn-nii that I had known as a child. Somewhere in me, I had hoped that he would forgive me if he knew that I was aware of Sorata being my child.

I guess things in life just do not go as planned, huh?

But I still found the notion of Tenn-nii getting married to Yaotome-san displeasing.

Tenn-nii is an Omega. Yaotome-san, by his appearance and the way he carries himself, is no doubt an Alpha. If I am guessing right, from what I had observed Yaotome-san, he has every intention to make Tenn-nii his mate… assuming that he has not, as of now.

I did not like that one bit.

In fact, I hate it, so much that it made me want to puke.

"Does it have to be Yaotome-san?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"Couldn't it be someone else?"

"Like who?"

"Who... you ask..."

I could not think of a name. But for a moment, I thought it would be nice if that person could be me.

Once again, I found myself troubled as to why I felt that way. I have been acting and thinking quite strangely ever since I met Sorata, and while I do not know or understand why, I did not bother to find out.

No. It was not that I did not bother. In fact, I might have realised it after thinking for a long time, just that I was too scared to admit it.

However, it was now clear to me, and I can no longer continue to deny it.

The way I feel towards Tenn-nii...

"What exactly are you dissatisfied with?"

"Eh?"

"Who I choose as my life partner is none of your business, isn't it? Yet you seem to hate the fact that I'm engaged and the idea that I will be married off, to the point that it makes you agitated. Why?"

"That... I don't know." I do know.

"Gaku loves me, genuinely. He is a man who puts his actions before words. I turned him down so many times, yet he never gave up on me. And despite what I have done and what I am, he still accepted me. And most of all, he cares for Sorata wholeheartedly and is willing to do things and make sacrifices for him. As a parent, I could not ask for more in a partner."

"So... that's why you chose him?" It is not fair.

"Is it wrong of me to do so?"

"No... but..." But...

I love you too, Tenn-nii...

I do not mean it as brothers. I love you the same way Yaotome-san does, too, and I am willing to do anything and everything for both you and Sorata.

I was just scared that you would never forgive me… which, as I expected, you did not.

My feelings would not lose to Yaotome-san's. In fact, I am confident that mine are stronger than his. Yet why did you have to choose him? Choose me instead. I do not care what other people would think and say. Give me another chance. Please. I promise I would not let you or Sorata down this time.

These words went around in my head, but I was unable to put them into spoken words.

Perhaps… I was too late?

"This conversation is going nowhere." Tenn-nii sighed, taking a step forward. "You are just acting spoilt and throwing a tantrum again, just like you used to do as a child. Here I was thinking that you had better things to talk to me about, but I'm terribly disappointed to see how little you have changed. I don't see any need to continue the conversation any longer. Now, if you would excuse me, I should be getting back to where my son and lover are."

He walked past me, and I caught his scent. There was a layer of fennel—Yaotome-san's scent—over his own vanilla, but that was all it is. It was not mixed together, the way mated pairs would.

They have not mated yet.

Despite being lovers, they have yet to form a mate's bond.

I still have a chance.

If I stop him now, I may be able to tell him how I truly feel. But that would mean that, by being selfish, I may be robbing him of the happiness that he worked so hard to find, which he deserves.

I only have a fraction of a second to decide.

Dear God above, please tell me: what is the right thing to do?

To **[grab hold of his hand](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11598018/chapters/31848366)**... or to **[let him go](http://archiveofourown.org/works/13845240)**...?

Which... should I choose?

**\- to be continued -**


	32. Chapter 12C

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hoped you like the little surprise with the previous chapter! You can choose Riku's course of action and that will lead to different endings. This is the path where he chooses to take Tenn's hand and not let him go.
> 
> However, I will only be working on divergence later in the year due to life and priorities.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

In the end, I chose to reach out to him. I cannot let him go, not just yet. 

Tenn-nii had always been the kind of person who would put himself before others, even if it meant hurting himself. 

He thinks that he hides it really well, and sometimes he does. But the moment he asked me what I was dissatisfied with, I realised that he was giving me a chance to explain how I felt. But it was not too late; he is still here, is he not? 

"Tenn-nii, listen, I—" 

Just as I tried to speak to him, the door opened someone peeked in. 

It was Yaotome-san. 

"Ah, there you are, Tenn. I was wondering where you went." 

"I was on my way back from the washroom was the students' works caught my eye. Nanase-sensei here had been kind enough to explain them to me and we were caught up in our conversation." 

"Ah…" His gaze dropped down to my hand which held Tenn-nii's wrist, which made him notice it. 

"We're just about done so we'll be going back now." He gently shook my hand off as he walked towards Yaotome-san. "I'll be seeing you around, Nanase-sensei." 

No. 

Tenn-nii. 

I do not want you to go. 

Please… do not leave me alone again. 

Just as I took a step forward, to chase after him, I felt a sharp pain in my chest, which felt like it was being bound and constricted. My lungs were being squeezed hard, and I could not breathe. I fell on my knees, unable to stand. 

An attack… why… 

No… not at this timing… 

"Nanase-san?!" 

I heard Iori's yell but was unable to reply to it as another voice called out to me. 

"Riku?!" 

Perhaps I was just hearing things, but I did not expect to hear Tenn-nii call my name. Neither did I expect him to return to my side. 

Was he worried about me? 

"Riku, where is your inhaler?" 

"Apron… pocket…" 

"I'll be taking it out for you." 

Which he did, and shook it hard. Uncapping the inhaler, he brought it to my lips… the same way he used to do for me since we were children. 

But, why? 

He had been so cold to me earlier as if I was just a mere stranger to him. Yet now he is back to being the kind and gentle Tenn-nii that I had always known. 

What should I do? My heart is overwhelmed with joy that I feel like I am going to cry. 

"Are you feeling better now?" 

"Yeah… Thanks…" 

I am not sure if it was the medication taking effect or the warmth of Tenn-nii's hands on my upper arms that made me feel at ease. However, I was not suffering anymore and was overcome with a strange calmness. 

"Nanase-san, do you need some water?" 

"Thanks, but I'm fine. I just need a bit of rest, I guess. Why don't you return to the party? You're Manami-chan's favourite uncle, so you have to be there, don't you?" 

"Even so, your condition…" 

"I'm fine. You worry too much." 

"If you insist…" 

"Tenn, we should be going back, too." 

"Right…" Tenn-nii seemed a little reluctant to leave my side, but he did. "Take care, Riku." 

I was left alone in the playroom after they took their leave. Sitting down on the floor, I let out a sigh. 

The first emotion that welled up in me was frustration. In the end, I was barely able to talk to Tenn-nii and ended up arguing with him instead. Why did I waste time thinking about what to say to him, I wonder? Even yesterday's excitement felt like a waste of my energy. 

In the end, I guess I was unable to change his mind, huh? 

Damn it. 

Why did I not accept my own feelings before today? Why could I not have acknowledged them when they bothered me so much? Why did I pretend not to know? What had I been so scared of? 

Would I have been able to convince Tenn-nii not to marry Yaotome-san if I had been aware of my feelings, and had told them to him? 

Truth to be told, I do not know. 

Both Tenn-nii and I are equally stubborn, one of the few traits that we shared despite being fraternal twins. I may have been able to change his mind, but there was also the possibility that he would have remained firm on his decision. The only reason why he would relent was that he did so in consideration of me, but that was in the past when we were still children. 

However, we are adults now. 

At a place I did not know, during the time that I did not spend with him, he had properly grown into one. Not just in the way he presents himself, but in his way of thinking as well. 

I honestly admit: despite having reached the age where I am seen and treated as an adult, I do not feel like one. At least, compared to others around me. Not just Tenn-nii, but even Tsumugi-san who is of the same age and Iori who is younger than me seem to be what others would call proper adults. 

If I remain the way I am, I will never be able to catch up to Yaotome-san, much less become his equal. 

Looking at the matter from a different perspective, up until recently, I did not even know how I felt about Tenn-nii. I could only feel nothing but sadness and regret. Yet, by observing the way they interacted with each other, anyone can tell the two of them knew each other for a long time. Even if my feelings now were stronger than his, that cannot beat the time they had spent building their relationship to what it is now. 

Besides, it is not like Tenn-nii saw me the same way that I see him, right? 

If I continue pushing on with my own selfish desires, it would certainly cause him more trouble. He probably did not want to have any more to do with me, which was why he might have opted to treat me coldly. 

Perhaps... it may really be for the best that I just give up on Tenn-nii. 

Despite it knowing that it was the logical choice, I really hated the thought of having to do that. 

Why is it so hard to make a simple decision, I wonder? 

At the very least, I know I would not be able to give him up right away, even if I had wanted to. 

I guess I would just have to let time pass, and perhaps as I get swept up in other parts of my life, I may just be able to let go of these feelings and forget all about him. 

That is why I would have to gather my resolve and make my decision now, that I would not go to see Tenn-nii again. 

I would no longer have anything to do with him or would desire to have an association with him. Not even as siblings or brothers. I would have to draw a line between us and have a clean break. 

As extreme as my choice of action may be, it was for the best. 

I know well enough that I am the kind of person who would hold onto lingering feelings, as long as there is some kind of connection. Which meant that even if I decided to give up on him, my determination would eventually waver if that exists. I made my decision in consideration of that. 

That is why I will just stop, and give up on Tenn-nii. 

It hurts for me to do that, so much that it is unbearable, but it is not something that is impossible. 

But, if I do that, maybe I can be like Tenn-nii and find someone else. Someone who loves me, and I could love. I do not know if there will be someone like that, but the thought that there may be something to look forward to. 

And surprisingly? That notion does not sound so bad at all. 

_"Chapter 12" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly tell you, it wasn't easy at all prepping two versions of chapter 12C in less than 24 hours. But regardless which you read and preferred, I hope you will continue to support this series! Thank you for reading!


	33. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think we'll be having more single-part chapters from here on out? Although I have yet to decide how the story will progress (aside from the general idea) I'm going to pick up the pace a little.
> 
> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"What the hell was that about?" 

The Children's Day event at the kindergarten, as well as Manami's birthday party, finished without any problems. 

After the event, Gaku and I decided to have dinner outside, as it would be quite late if we had decided to cook and eat at home. The Tsunashi family invited us to eat with them, so we huddled into a restaurant near the station that was big enough to provide us with a place to eat together. 

We parted ways after that. While walking home, Sorata was sleepy so I carried him, passing our bags for Gaku to carry. He dozed off within seconds. 

That was when Gaku started the conversation. 

"What exactly are you referring to?" 

"You were talking to Nanase about something earlier, weren't you? What exactly was it about?" 

I was hoping that he would forget about that, but it seems that he had been bothered by it the entire time. What a simple-minded man. 

"Why do you want to know about that?" 

"Well, anyone would be curious. Besides, it seems like you two seems to know each other from way back. What exactly is your relationship with him?" 

"What, you jealous?" 

"It is wrong for me to be? You are my fiance, after all. Don't you think it would be more strange if I wasn't?" 

"You have a point." 

"You know I don't like it when people keep things from me, especially if it's important. Nanase was your real family name, wasn't it, before you went to Kujou's place. That redhead had the same name, and Sorata looks just like him. You can't tell me that these are all mere coincidences. I can tell that you are hiding something from me, and I believe I have the right to know." 

Gaku is right, but he was being too straightforward. 

"What good would it do if I tell you?" I sighed. "Well, I suppose it won't hurt to tell you. Riku is my younger twin brother." 

"T-Twin brother?!" 

"You mean I never told you?" 

"Not a word! I mean, I always thought that you were an only child since you look and talk like one. No wonder you are strangely good at taking care of others. But twins, huh... you two don't really look alike at all." 

"That's because we are fraternal twins. Riku looks more like our father, while I happen to resemble our mother more." 

"I see. So the reason why Sorata looks like him is due to that relation, huh. Here I was thinking that he's your former lover and the father of your kid." 

"..." 

Gaku was not wrong, but he was not right either. Then again, he simply made the same conclusion that anyone would have. I could not blame him for that. 

But, should I tell him the truth? 

If we were to get married and become mates, he would have to learn the truth one day. Knowing him, he would ask eventually, perhaps not so soon or when Sorata is much older. Regardless, this is a matter that I cannot keep mum about for the rest of my life. 

For the sake of our union and our future, it may be best to tell him. 

"Well, you're not completely wrong about that." 

"Huh?" 

"To be specific, you did jump to the wrong conclusion about Riku being my lover. However, you are not wrong about him being the father of my son… this precious child here." 

"I… I don't understand. You're twins… siblings, right? Related by blood..." It seems that the revelation had been quite a shock to him and he could not wrap his head around it, but his confused expression was rather adorable. "I'm sorry, I'm just quite confused right now. Could you give me a proper explanation?" 

"When I had my first heat, it was during the summer break of my third year of high school. For certain reasons, I had my first heat on that day and no one else was at home. Riku had been affected by my pheromones and lost control of himself." 

"You don't mean that he forced himself on you, did he?" 

"That is what he did." 

"Fuck that bastard..." 

"Chill, Gaku. I'm sure anyone in his position would have been affected the same way. But I suppose that goes to say how strong my pheromones had been if it was able to affect a Beta that badly." 

"Wait. So your brother is a Beta?" 

"Yes. He's a Beta like my mother. At least, that was what his test results indicated." 

"Really?" I could not understand Gaku's disbelief. "I know he certainly looks like one, but I had thought he was an Alpha when he introduced himself." 

Now that was something new to my ears. "I beg your pardon?" 

"I'm not sure how it works, but sometimes we Alphas are able to recognise a fellow Alpha by their scent. That brother of yours definitely has the smell of an Alpha. Were you able to tell?" 

"I wonder. Riku's scent is something that I had been used to since I was a child, so I won't be able to tell which it is. All I would know that it is Riku's." 

"I suppose that's true. So... he knows that Sorata is his?" 

"He seemed to have found out only recently. It seemed that my parents never told him anything after what happened that day." 

"Why? Doesn't he have the right to know?" 

"At that time, his body was still weak. It has always been since he was a child. My parents kept it from him to prevent aggravating his condition, if not he would have suffered constant attacks just as you had seen earlier." 

"From stress, I presume?" 

"Yeah." 

"Can I be honest about something?" 

"Go ahead." 

"I think that's a pretty shitty reason not to tell him. I mean, the incident involved the both of you. There's no reason why they should not have told him earlier, regardless of his condition. You were both eighteen then. That's close enough to be an adult. He should have been made responsible for everything. I don't see why you had to suffer so much when he got off scot-free." 

"Gaku, that's enough. If you want to blame him, blame me first." 

"Hah? Why? You were the victim here!" 

"All the more that I should be blamed. If my heat didn't come, nothing would have happened. Also, Riku then was a child who knew much less about the world compared to others. More than an eighteen-year-old, he was still like a child. As the person who was always by his side, I should have made sure that I taught him properly, yet I didn't. In a way, I was suffering the consequences of my own choices and actions." 

"Stop blaming yourself, you idiot." 

"The one who told my parents not to tell him anything was me. Despite how they were debated on whether to tell him or not, I was the one who made the final call in the matter. Also, before I left home, I chose not to speak to Riku. I was too afraid to. So at the very least, don't blame him for not knowing anything. It really isn't his fault, at least in that regard." 

"You know, for an older brother you really spoil him too much. Just like the way you do Sorata." 

"But it's the truth. You can't blame someone who was made unaware of things by the people around him." 

"Can't deny that I guess..." Gaku sighed, rubbing the back of his neck absently. "Suddenly, I feel like a complete idiot." 

"Oh, you finally admit it." 

"Don't start picking a fight with me, you damned brat. I was just thinking that it was just really stupid of me to have gotten jealous over Nanase. I've always thought that you still had some lingering feelings... you know, of love and the like, for whoever Sorata's father was." 

"Hmmm..." 

Well... he was not wrong. 

"But what would you do if he says that he wants custody of Sorata?" 

"That will never happen. I made it clear that he has no right to call himself a father to this child. He knows that it's the truth, and with his personality, I doubt he would fight back." 

"Even though you were the one who kept him in the dark about it?" 

"At that time, I was the only one who wanted this child. It has always been up to me to protect him, no matter what happens." 

"No offence to that adoptive father of yours, but it seems that Kujou-san thinks of himself as having the duty to protect him as well. I heard from Ryuu: about two years ago when you started modelling, there was this small-scale agency that was too desperate to make him their talent?" 

"Ah. That one." 

Because he often accompanied me to work, Sorata was seen by many people in the industry. Many of them wanted to make him into a child model because he was so adorable, but he refused. I chose to respect his decisions, but many were persistent. I heard Kujou-san medicated some cases behind closed doors and hence they gave up. However, there was one who resorted to extreme means to get their hands on my son, and when Kujou-san caught wind of that he took action immediately by, well, pulling some strings. That agency was ruined by a media scandal and eventually closed down, but no one knew how much of what was reported had been true. 

"Getting the JSDF involved for a mere kidnapping case was too much, don't you think?" 

"I have to agree with you on that." 

By the time we reached this point in the conversation, we had reached my apartment building. He passed our bags back to me. I balanced my leather tote on my shoulder and hooked the straps of Sorata's backpack on my elbow. 

"Can I meet you soon, maybe sometime this or next week? There's still plenty of things that I want to talk to you about." 

"Lunch, dinner or the weekend?" 

"Whichever's convenient for you. If not, I'll just ask Anesagi for your schedule and I'll plan from there. Maybe we can bring Sorata out somewhere, too." 

"Sounds good to me." 

"I'll let you know as soon as I can." Gaku leaned down to place a kiss on my cheek. "Thanks for today. Good night and rest well." 

"Same to you. Don't stay up late drinking and make your mother worry about you again." 

"I know. Don't treat me like a child, you damned brat." 

"Pathetic adult." 

Those were the names we called each other when we were first acquainted. Now, we do not really mean what we call each other anymore, but we were so used to it that they could be considered terms of endearment if anything. 

The elderly guard greeted me with his usual warm smile as I entered the building and I returned it with my own. 

As I was waiting for the lift to arrive at the lobby, Sorata woke up. He was sleepy but insisted that he take a bath with me before being put to bed. We took a quick one and I made sure that we had dried our hair before we climbed onto the mattress. That night, he snuggled into my chest as he drifted off to sleep, and I wrapped my arms around him. 

For the first time in a long while, I saw an unusual dream. It was of the day when I first held my tiny baby in my arms. 

The only difference that made it a dream was that I was not alone. There was someone beside me, who shared the joy of his birth. This person… although I could not see his face I seemed to know clearly who it was. He had his arm wrapped around me lovingly as if he was protecting and supporting me. 

"He looks just like you." He chuckled softly, stroking little Sora's forehead with his thumb. "Especially his nose. He'll be sure to grow up into a beautiful child." 

If this had been in real life, I would not be wrong in saying that I have never felt so much happiness before. 

However, a dream is just a dream, and that is all it will be. 

_"Chapter 13" end_

**\- to be continued -**


	34. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorata's birthday fic, "[Sorata's Big Adventure](http://archiveofourown.org/works/13843335)", is now up! Please read it if you haven't!
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

More than a month passed since the Children's Day event, and it is now the middle of June.

Since that day, I did not speak or meet with Tenn-nii at all. as I had told myself to. Then again, he did not approach me either, so I managed to avoid making contact with him.

In the kindergarten, Sorata still approached me from time to time, although there were always other students who wanted my attention, especially those from my class. Because of that, I somehow ended up spending very little time with him. However, because there were other teachers and his friends around, he did not seem too bothered about this.

Life went on as it did, but it no longer felt the same.

In the past, even an ordinary day would have been fun to me. However, I could not say the same thing. Rather than it being boring or the like, I could no longer feel anything about it. I felt as if something had been taken from me, but did not know what it was or how to fill in the gap that was left behind. I was living, but for what purpose? It was not like I had one before, but I never gave it much thought until now.

Despite that, I chose to pretend that everything was as it had been before.

Because of this, not many people have noticed the change in me. So far, it seemed that the only person who did was Iori, who constantly asks if I was alright. Then again, he was a worrywart and would ask that on a regular basis.

I would like to say that part of the reason why I felt less energetic was due to the changing seasons. The rainy season hit hard, and it affected my condition. However, I was well enough to work and do my daily tasks, so I focused my attention on taking extra care of myself instead of just brooding over something I was not sure about. Falling sick would only cause trouble for everyone, so I made it a conscious habit to be extra careful during the rainy and cold seasons.

However, the rainy season also meant that unexpected incidents were bound to happen.

During this time, there were a few children whose parents were delayed by either traffic jams or train delays and were unable to pick them up on time. During this time, one teacher from any of the classes would stay back to watch over all the children in the playroom.

According to the schedule, today was supposed to be Momo-san's turn to stay back. However, because Yuki-san's heat had come and that Momo-san was his mate, both of them were unable to come in for work today.

I volunteered to stay back since I do not have much to do off work.

From my class, there were four children, Tamaki's two and three from Iori's. Much to my surprise, amongst them, was Sorata.

When he came into the room, he was sulking a little. However, when he saw me, his face brightened up. Running towards me, he joined the small crowd of children were asking me to read them a story. "Pancakes-sensei! Good afternoon!"

"Good afternoon, Sorata-kun." I felt his bright smile warm up my heart and it was a blissful feeling. "We're going to have a bit of story time, would you like to join us?"

"Yes, please!"

Each child had a book they want, so I read each of their requests. While I did, their parents began to arrive one by one. It was not before long before most of the children were gone.

By the time I had finished the fourth book, only Sorata was left.

"Do you want me to read another story to you?"

He shook his head.

"Then, how about we do some drawing?"

Again, the same answer.

"Mmm... a game? Or perhaps a snack? Are you hungry yet?"

I thought he would agree to the latter, but he even refused that option. I do not remember him being that disagreeable before, despite how he sometimes comes across as a little unsociable to certain people.

"How about we just sit and talk until your Mama gets here?"

"Un!"

Ah, he finally agreed to something.

"Can Sorata come closer to Sensei?"

"Sure, why not? It makes it easier for us to talk too."

"Yay!" He cheered, then proceeded to climb onto my lap.

It was not like he was heavy, but I did not think that he would do something like that so it was a bit of a surprise. However, what I did not expect was for him to snuggle up to me.

"What's with you today, Sorata-kun? Are you feeling unwell?"

"Sorata no like the rain and cold..."

"Ah..."

It seems that he hates the rainy season, too, and that might have made him moody. There were some children in my class who were like him. Perhaps he was snuggling up to me because he was seeking warmth? Or was it his moodiness that made him want to be spoiled?

Regardless, I want to see him become cheerful again.

"There there." I patted his hair gently. "Sensei's here with you, so you don't have to worry about a thing."

"Yes! Sorata likes Pancakes-sensei lots! Does Sensei like Sorata too?"

"Of course I like Sorata-kun too!" I gave him a hug, which made him squeal happily.

"Ah, Sensei! Listen to this! Sorata went to the zoo recently!"

"Really? When was that?"

"Ummm... Sorata doesn't remember. But we watched the Sky Rangers before we went!"

"Ah, that means that it's a Sunday."

"Sunday?"

"Sunday is the day you get to see the Sky Rangers and all the cool heroes on TV."

"Ohh!"

"So who did you go to the zoo with?"

"Sorata went with Mama and Mama's friend, Gaku-nii! Gaku-nii is tall and very cool and very handsome! Like a person on TV!"

"I see…" The mention of Yaotome-san gave me a sour feeling in my mouth. However, I felt the weight on my shoulders lighten a little, just by talking to him. "What kind of animals did you see at the zoo?"

"Lots of big cats! Like lions and tigers! And small leopards! And monkeys and horsies and bears and elephants and rhinos and kangaroos! And… and turtles and zebras and giraffes and birdies and sheep and deer and pandas! Big cats too!"

"You already mentioned them at the start, Sorata-kun." Him listing down the animals was terribly adorable, so much so that I could not help but smile. "Which is your favourite animal at the zoo?"

"The cats!"

"You did mention that there were lions and tigers and leopard cats. Which one do you like the most?"

"Mmm… Leopard! Because they're really, really fast at running! Sorata saw them on TV with Aunt Mimi before!" Fast at running... did he mean a cheetah instead? "Sorata likes leopards because they are Mama's favourite, too!"

"Oh?"

That little bit of information jolted my memory. Since he was a child, Tenn-nii's favourite animal at the zoo had always been leopards. That had not changed when he reached adolescence, and it seems that it remained the same as an adult.

"What about Sensei? What kind of animal does Sensei like?"

"I like all kinds of animals. But if it's at the zoo, I like the big cats as well!"

"Same as Sorata, then!"

"Yup, the same. What else did you do at the zoo, aside from seeing the animals? Did you eat lunch there?"

"Yes! Mama packed us lunch!"

"What did your Mama make for you?"

"Mama made lots for Sorata and Gaku-nii! But Sorata likes the pancake rolls the best!"

"Pancake rolls? That sounds really tasty!"

"It is! Ah, Gaku-nii also bought a big strawberry ice-cream, and it was sweet and yummy! Sorata shared it with Mama!"

"I see... did he buy you anything else?"

"No, but Mama did! There was a place with lots of cute toys and animal things. Sorata wanted to get a friend for Mr Cat. Mr Cat is always lonely at home alone when Mama and Sorata are not around. Mama said Sorata can get only one thing, so Sorata chose a plush toy!"

"Really? What kind?"

"A leopard!"

So that explained the tingling sense of deja vu that I had been feeling for a while. It reminded me of the one that I had chosen for Tenn-nii back then, which he had left behind.

"Sensei?"

"I'm fine! I see! I'm sure Mr Cat must be very happy with his new friend!"

"Yes, he is!"

"Does Mr Cat's new friend have a name?"

"Yes, he does! It's—"

"Sorata, Mama's here... oh..."

Tenn-nii rushed in at that moment but stopped moving and speaking when he saw Sorata sitting on my lap. If I were in his position, I would have been just as surprised.

"Good evening, Kujou-san."

"Good evening, Nanase-sensei..."

"Mama!" Sorata climbed off my lap, running towards Tenn-nii to hug him. "Mama is late! Was Kao-chan slow today?"

"I'm sorry, sweetheart." Tenn-nii bent down to kiss him on the cheek, although our eyes met for a moment before he turned his attention back to Sorata. "The car was stuck in very bad traffic. Kao-chan tried his best to get Mama here on time, but it's not his fault. To apologise, why don't we eat at your favourite place tonight?"

"Can Sorata order pancakes?"

"Of course."

"Pancakes!" He cheered, but suddenly turned towards me. I could not understand why and was still puzzled when he ran back to my side. "Pancakes-sensei, join us for dinner?"

"Eh?!" Both Tenn-nii and I had the same reaction to his request.

Even though I had fully intended to avoid spending time with him alone in our private time, I could not bring myself to turn down Sorata's invitation. Not when he was smiling at me this brightly.

"So-Sorata, you can't just make that kind of requests so suddenly. You'll make Nanase-sensei feel troubled."

"Eh?" Sorata's smile faded when Tenn-nii chided him and turned back to me. "Sensei, is Sorata troublesome?"

"N-Not at all!"

"So does that mean that Sensei will join Mama and Sorata for dinner? Sorata wants to eat pancakes with Sensei again... is that no good?"

This child...

I gave Tenn-nii a worried glance. His expression was the same as mine. Neither of us could refuse a request from him, but because it was something so out of the blue that we cannot help but feel troubled about it. However, because Sorata had directed his question to me, I had no choice but to answer him.

"Kujou-san, is it okay with you?" I directed the answer back to him. "If you are, I will gladly accept the offer."

Despite having no choice but to agree, part of me really wanted to say yes. As expected, I could not let my feelings for him go so easily, despite having tried so hard to. I knew being wishy-washy was a bad habit, but I know that I am not in a position to be able to act on my feelings. That was why I thought that getting rid of them would be for the best, but in the end, I disappointed myself.

However, what bothers me the most is that I still do not know how he felt towards me.

That day, he had treated me coldly and harshly. Yet he was also warm and gentle. I do not know which side reflected how he truly felt, and I still do not know what he sees me as. I am not so smart that I would be able to guess, but it was not something that I could ask him directly.

"I..." He began but did not continue.

If anything, it seemed to be debated over something.

As expected, he probably does not want to be around me? I cannot think of any other reason that would make him think so hard. He was avoiding my gaze too,

"Mama, please?"

When Sorata begged his mother, I actually felt a bit guilty for pushing the responsibility onto him.

It was then that Tenn-nii finally looked up at me, into my eyes. It seemed like he was trying to ascertain what I wanted. I kept my gaze firm, hoping that he would understand that it was my way of saying that I hoped he would say yes.

"I don't mind. Nanase-sensei can join us tonight."

Sorata let out a cheer of joy and set about to pack up his things, so as to be ready to leave.

I should be doing the same, but I could not move from where I sat on the floor.

What is this feeling of relief?

It is like I finally found what I was missing, and did not know that I was looking for.

Thank you.

Thank you, all the Gods above, for answering my selfish prayers.

Thank you, Tenn-nii, for saying yes.

And especially Sorata... thank you. For giving me perhaps one more chance, to believe in hope and to try again.

I will not let any of you down.

This time, I will be sure to tell Tenn-nii how I feel about him.

Regardless of what his answer will be, I am prepared for the worst.

At the very least, it is much better than doing nothing and regretting.

_"Chapter 14" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Kao-chan" refers to Anesagi Kaoru for those who did not make the connection.


	35. Chapter 15A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

If it is one thing that I had learnt ever since becoming a parent, is that an adult could never fully understand the heart of a child. This is ironic, seeing how adults were once children themselves. 

I am not implying that this is a bad thing. At least, not all the time. Life becomes full of surprises when you do not know what to expect, and that makes it exciting. 

However, it does get a little worrisome at times, especially when you have plans on your own. 

Today, I was delayed by the traffic jam caused by the heavy downpour in Tokyo. I was not coming from work, but rather from an important meeting held at the conference room of my talent agency. It was held to decide the various arrangements related to the engagement and wedding—Gaku's and mine. 

As Kujou-san was currently overseas supervising the education of my adoptive sister and his heir-in-training, Aya, he participated via video call. He stated that he would be back in Japan this weekend and we decided that the official signing of all documents, including the wedding application, would be done then. The wedding will be held about two weeks to a month later, depending on the pace of the preparations. 

It was not that they were in a hurry, but rather it seemed more practical not to dilly-dally about this matter. But because everything had been confirmed, I cannot delay telling Sorata about this any longer. 

As I was in Anesagi-san's car, I thought of how I should tell him. 

At home? Outside? 

How should I phrase my words? 

How would he react to the news? 

There were so many worries and uncertainties, and that was probably the reason why I did not want to tell him until everything was settled. 

Anesagi-san dropped me off at the corner of the street. By that time, the rain had let up, but I was already quite late. Before stepping onto the grounds of the kindergarten, I decided to bring him out for dinner today. I would let him order whatever he wants, and after we are done eating I will tell him about my marriage to Gaku. 

Sorata is an understanding child. Even if he does not accept this, I am sure that he will come to do so one day. 

However, little did I expect that he would ruin my plans by making a surprising request. 

"Pancakes-sensei, join us for dinner?" 

As ashamed as I am to admit this, but I cannot fathom what is going on in that child's head. 

Actually, not just Sorata, but Riku as well. I did not think that he would redirect the responsibility of making the decision to me. 

Seeing how Sorata makes few requests of me, comparing to other children his age, I want to answer each one. But, because what I had intended to tell him, it would surely be awkward for me to speak about that matter when Riku is around. I do not want him getting so stressed and worked up about it that he would have an attack, which he was more susceptible to in this season. 

What should I do? 

I did not hate the idea of Riku joining us, and I cannot bring myself to say no to my precious Sora. But I could not say yes so easily. 

Certainly, there will be another chance to talk, and that it does not have to be today. But, if I know myself well enough, I would definitely begin to find excuses to not talk to him about it as soon as possible and wait until the few days before the wedding before doing so. 

But, as I had said, there are many chances to tell him. I only have this one chance to grant this wish. 

"I don't mind. Nanase-sensei can join us tonight." 

"Yay!" Sorata cheered. 

However, Riku did not. 

It was not just because he was sitting on the floor that made me unable to see his face, but because he had hung it low. When he was a child, he often did that when he was disappointed or feeling own. A small twinge of regret hit me, as I could not help but wonder if he actually had been expecting me to turn Sorata down. 

However, if he had been so against it, he would have simply refused. Unlike me, he is not in the position of a parent. He has no obligation to agree to a child's selfish request. 

"Sorata, why don't you start packing up first? We'll be ready to go after that." 

"Yes! Pancakes-sensei, let's go!" 

As they did their packing up, I excused myself to use the washroom. 

Well, I did not have the urge to go, but I wanted to freshen up my face, at the very least. Cannot afford to let my emotions show on my face in front of Sorata, after all. 

Sorata was almost done by the time I came out, but it seemed that Riku was still mid-way. He explained that he had to lock up the school as well, so he instructed for us to wait for him outside the gates. 

And we did. 

I could not brush off the mixed feelings within me. After all, Sorata looks so happy. 

"Say, Sora…" 

"Hmm? What is it, Mama?" 

"Why did you invite Nanase-sensei to have dinner with us?" 

"Sorata and Mama and Sensei all like pancakes, right? So Sorata was thinking that we can all eat pancakes together! Mama always says that food tastes better when there are more people!" 

"I see…" 

"Mama doesn't seem happy… Does Mama hate Pancakes-sensei…?" 

Sometimes it is amazing how perceptive this little darling is. But the questions that he asks are a bit hard for an adult to answer honestly… 

"No…" It was not a lie, but I could not tell him the truth. Rather, I do not think I have the right to admit the truth, be it to him or to anyone else. "I don't think I do." 

"So does that mean Mama likes Sensei?" 

Really now, this child... 

"Mama doesn't really know." 

"Eh? But Mama doesn't hate Sensei, right?" 

"It's true. I don't hate him, but I'm not sure if I like him." 

"Mmm... Mama is weird." 

"That's how adults are. You'll become weird too, one day when you grow up." 

At that time, Riku appeared behind us, much to my surprise. I was worried that he may have overheard our conversation, but it seemed like he did not. Unless he was getting better at hiding his emotions, it would have shown on his face. 

He only had to lock the main gates of the school compound, and with that done we were ready to leave. 

"Sorry to keep you waiting! Shall we go?" 

"Yes!" I reached my right hand down for Sorata to take in his left. 

However, I did not expect that he would catch hold of Riku's with his other hand. 

"S-Sorata-kun?" Riku seemed as surprised as I was about this, and a blush rose on his face as he stammered. 

"Let's all go together!" 

Well now. This turned out to be a lot more awkward than I had expected it to be. 

However, it made me think. 

Perhaps, if I had made a different choice back then, how much different would our lives had been? Would something like this... the three of us, heading out for dinner hand-in-hand, have been something normal? Would this fleeting moment of peace and warmth also be something that we get to experience every day? Or, would we have been worse off instead, living days filled with nothing but hurt and hatred, despair and melancholy? 

I have always avoided telling Sorata about his father. But now that he had met and had come to like Riku, I am more afraid of him knowing the truth. 

It is selfish of me to think that way, but at the very least, he is happy without that knowledge. 

And as long as he is happy, I know I will be, too.

**\- to be continued -**


	36. Chapter 15B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"Mama, Sorata wants pancakes!" 

"Yes, I know, dear. But we have just arrived, so let Nanase-sensei take his time to decide what he wants, okay?" 

As soon as we were shown our seats at the usual family restaurant, Sorata made his request without even looking at the menu. However, both Riku and I have yet to decide on our orders so I had to make him wait for a little while. 

I was in the mood for pasta, so I flipped to that page. I glanced through it and made up my mind quickly. 

Peeking above the menu, I noticed that Riku had been looking at me. 

The two of us were sitting face-to-face. Sorata chose to sit next to Riku this time, instead of me. At the moment, he was looking at the page that Riku had flipped to and telling him about the dishes recognised from there. 

"Kujou-san, are you ready to order?" 

"Yes, I am." 

"I'll call the wait staff over, then." 

The waitress came over within a few seconds. 

Riku let me order first, so I placed mine and Sorata's. "Spaghetti Genovese and a ginger ale for me, and the Children's Pancake set with a cup of apple juice for the child." 

"I'll have Omelette Rice with the homard sauce and shrimp. And a hot lemon tea." 

His choice was unsurprising. 

Riku was the kind of person who, once he decided on it, would only order his favourite foods. There was an outlet of this family restaurant chain near our parents' house as well, and we went there quite frequently as a family when Riku was not hospitalised. Ever since that dish was introduced as part of the regular menu, he tried it once and only ordered it ever since. 

The waitress repeated our order and once it was confirmed ran off to serve another table. 

While waiting for the food to arrive, Sorata passed the time talking to Riku. I said little and simply watched them interact. They seemed to be talking about hero shows, from what I gathered from the conversation. 

I am sure that, in the eyes of others, they would indeed look like parent and child rather than teacher and student. Several people—including Gaku, Ryuu and even Sougo-san—have pointed out that Sorata looks more like Riku and does not resemble me too much, despite my own opinion that he does take after me more. Then again, it would probably not be easy to tell until he grows up. 

To be honest, however, watching them made me think that I was watching two children rather than an adult-and-child pair talking to one another. 

It was, in several ways, kind of adorable. 

How could one not help but to smile at them? 

When Riku looked back up at me, he gave me a slightly confused, questioning look. That was what made me conscious of the look on my face, and I swiftly averted my gaze from them. 

I hope I was not making a weird face. 

We began eating when our orders arrived. 

Sorata cut up his pancake with the edge of his plastic fork, the way I had taught him to, into bite-sized pieces. He offered me a piece as usual, which I returned with a mouthful of my pasta. Judging from his face, he did not seem to like the taste of the pesto very much but ate it without complaining. 

However, I did not think that he would offer Riku a piece as well. "Sensei, say ahh!" 

"Eh?!" Well, anyone would be surprised if a child did something like that out of the blue. 

However, it was still strange. Sorata rarely shares food with anyone. So far, he only does it with me, his caretaker Misumi-san and Anesagi-san, who is like a godmother to him. 

"Ahh!" Sorata repeated, still holding out the fork to him. 

With little chance to refuse, Riku accepted the bite. 

"Is it yummy?" 

"Very tasty, just like how all pancakes are! Do you want to try Sensei's omelette rice as well?" 

As expected, he nodded. After all, it was not like my son to say no to food. 

"How is it?" 

"Yummy! Just like Mama's!" 

"That's good to hear!" 

I was thinking of ordering dessert if I was not full after the pasta, but it ended up being more than I had thought. It seemed like it was the same for Riku. As for Sorata, he seemed too eager to continue his conversation with Riku the moment he had put down his fork. 

"Say, Sensei!" He tugged on his sleeve for his attention. "Does Sensei have someone that he really, really likes?" 

Riku and I, who were sipping on our respective drinks, had the same reaction. 

What is this child thinking?! 

"N-N-No, I don't!" Riku was definitely lying, seeing how badly he was stammering, but any child, like Sorata, would not have picked up on the implications behind that. 

"Then, does Sensei like Sorata?" 

"Well, of course, I do." 

"Then what about Mama?" 

"E-Eh?" 

Well, this has gotten... rather awkward... 

I know Sorata's idea of 'like' meant 'to think of another person in a favourable way' rather than of the romantic implication. However, to us adults, especially the two of us and what had happened in the past, it was a difficult question to answer. 

"Does Sensei like Sorata's Mama?" 

"Well... I... I can't say that I do for sure..." 

Wait, what is that supposed to mean? 

"Eh? So does that mean... Sensei hates Mama?" 

"No!" His reply came so quickly that I got a bit of a shock. "Of course I don't hate Te—your Mama!" 

"Which...?" Sorata made a confused expression. 

Truthfully, I would like to know which actually was too. 

"Y-You see, Sorata-kun, I don't hate your Mama at all. But I can't really say that I like him, either... it's kind of complicated, you see..." 

"So... Sensei doesn't hate Mama, but doesn't like him too?" Since Riku did not give a direct answer, Sorata drew his own conclusion. 

Where is this conversation going, I wonder? 

"I guess you could put it that way?" 

"So since Sensei doesn't hate Mama, can Sensei come to like Mama?" 

"Eh?" 

"Mama said that he doesn't hate Sensei. Sensei also said that he doesn't hate Mama. That means that Mama and Sensei can get along and come to like each other!" 

"Sorata-kun, why do you want Sensei and Mama to like each other?" 

"Because Sorata really likes Mama and also really likes Sensei! So we should all get along!" 

I was going to keep quiet and let the conversation take its course, but I let a burning question slip out. "Sorata, how much do you like Nanase-sensei?" 

Then again, I had to know how he feels. 

Riku is his biological father, after all, but he still does not know it. If he knew, would that make him like Riku more? I cannot be sure because Sorata never brought up or mentioned about the topic of his father ever since the day he asked me why he does not have two parents like his friends do. 

"Sorata likes Sensei lots!" 

"How much do you mean by lots? As much as Mama?" 

"Mmmm... not as much as Mama. But! Sorata thinks it would be nice if Sensei could become Sorata's Papa... ehehe..." 

"..." 

I could not say anything in reply to that comment. I looked up at Riku to see how he had reacted to that. He looked back at me with an expression that was between bewildered and perturbed... just like mine. 

"Mama? Sensei?" Noticing how quiet we have gone, Sorata began to look a bit scared. "Did Sorata do something wrong...?" 

"No, you didn't do anything wrong." I reached across the table to pat his hair. "Sorata, Mama has something to tell you." 

"Eh...?" 

I turned my attention to Riku, who remained still and silent. "Nanase-sensei, I apologise, but could you give us a little... private time? I would like to speak to him, alone." 

Riku probably knew the reason without asking. "S-Sure... I need to use the washroom as well, so I'll take my time?" 

He excused himself promptly after that and disappeared around the corner. 

Sorata, who looked confused and unsure of what was happening, held the edge of the table and lowered his head as if he was peeking out of a hole that he was hiding in. I gestured for him to come over to sit next to me, which he did. I stretched out my hand, and he put his small one in my palm. 

"Mama?" 

"Sorata, you like Sensei, right?" 

He nodded. "Un." 

"What about Gaku-nii? Do you like him too?" 

Sorata paused for a while but eventually nodded his response. "Gaku-nii is kind and nice. Sorata likes him." 

"Do you like Sensei more, or Gaku-nii more?" 

I felt bad making him choose between them since he would not be able to. The answer was obvious to me, but it was not to him. Seeing how he was so debated on his answer, I had to change my question. 

"Sorata, do you think you can like Gaku-nii as much as you like Sensei?" 

"Maybe... Sorata doesn't know." 

"Even if Mama asks you to?" 

"Eh? Why...?" 

Seeing his teary eyes and frightened expression made my heart sink with guilt. 

Was I being too forceful? Did I approach this matter wrongly? What did I do something wrong? What should I have done? What should I have not done? 

"Sorata, sweetie, Mama has something very important to tell you. Will you listen very, very carefully?" 

"Yes..." 

Well, here goes... 

"You see... Gaku-nii and Mama will be getting married soon." 

"Married?" He repeated, not fully understanding what I had meant by that. 

"That means that Gaku-nii will become your Papa." 

"Gaku-nii...will become Sorata's Papa...?" 

"Yes, that's correct." 

"Oh..." He looked down at his lap. 

The announcement probably needed time to sink in, and for him to comprehend it. 

However, when I saw the tears that had been threatening to form in his eyes start to flow out, I could immediately tell what he thought of the matter before even he expressed it in words. 

"—on't want. Sorata 'on't want Gaku-nii to 'ecome 'ish Papa..." 

He may be quite the crybaby, but it was rare for Sorata to cry this loudly even when he was much younger and smaller, except for when he was scared. But when he does, it was like it was a reflection of how strongly he felt about the matter. 

But for the first time, I did not know what to do. 

"Sorata, don't cry, please don't cry..." 

"No!" He yelled at me, slapping away the hand that I reached out to him. It was something he had never done before. "NO!" 

Before I could recover from the shock, he moved away from me, off the seat and ran away. 

"Sorata!" I called out to him, but he did not stop or turn back. 

However, before he could have gone far, he bumped into Riku, who appeared from the corner. The worried expression on his face was all it took for me to know that he had been listening in. 

"Shenshei!" He sobbed into Riku's chest as he scooped him into his arms. 

"Hush, Sorata. Sensei's got you." He patted the back of his head, soothing him to calm him down. "You'll hurt your throat, so don't cry so hard, okay?" 

"Un..." 

I had not expected Riku to be so gentle with him. 

He may be a kindergarten teacher, so perhaps it was expected, yet just watching him calm Sorata down made my chest hurt. I already made my resolve... yet, why am I wavering? What exactly am I doing, really? I do not know, and I do not know if I want to know. Why does this have to be harder than it has to be? 

I guess in the end... I really am nothing but a failure of a parent, am I not? 

"Kujou-san." Riku bent down next to where I was sitting. "I think you should take him home now." 

"I will... Thank you." Sorata was still sobbing when Riku passed him over to me. "Oh, the bill..." 

"I'll foot it. Consider it my treat tonight." 

"I'll make it up to you and return the favour another time." 

"It's okay, really! You don't have to!" 

I could only bow, in both apology and appreciation, before gathering our belongings and carrying them with the arm that was not holding Sorata. 

As I left the family restaurant and quickly made my way home, I felt tears welling up in my eyes as well. 

It was so frustrating. 

In the end, I was just lying to myself the entire time. I did not believe in myself, instead simply letting myself get carried away by the opinions of others and chose to believe that everything they said was absolute. I should have put more thought into how I felt, and in how Sorata felt. That way, I probably would not be feeling this way now. 

Riku… Sorata… Gaku… because of what I did, and what I did not do, I hurt all of them. 

But, it is much too late to make amendments now. 

All I can do is to suffer the consequences of my own actions and see through what I had already agreed to do to the very end. And perhaps hope that, from now on, I will be able to do the right thing. 

That is, if I know what the right thing actually is. 

_"Chapter 15" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can I make it known how much my heart hurt when I wrote Sorata's outburst? I would have cried if I was not outdoors.


	37. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realised that I haven't posted Sakuya's profile yet, so I'll have that at the end of the next chapter.

After what happened yesterday, I could not help but be worried about both Sorata and Tenn-nii, so much so that I could barely sleep a wink. I did, eventually, but when I woke up I felt as if I spent the whole night awake. Because of that, I was yawning most of the day. 

Tsumugi-san seemed worried and asked if I was alright when she came in this morning. Iori, however, scolded me for looking so tardy. I did not have time to talk to him, so I could not explain to him why. 

It seemed that Sorata was absent today. 

According to Iori, Tenn-nii had called the kindergarten this morning to say that he would not be coming. However, there was no reason given, which make me think that the only possibility was that incident. 

I had considered going to visit them after work since today was a Friday, but I do not know where he lives. 

Because I saw how well-behaved Sorata was around Yaotome-san that day, I thought he quite liked him. I am not sure if it was the way Tenn-nii had told him or how he had interpreted the news, but I did not expect Sorata to outright refuse. Rather, I did not expect that he would make a big fuss, either. He did not seem like the kind of child who would do something that, unlike other children his age. 

But more than Sorata, I was actually more worried about Tenn-nii. 

Sorata's refusal seemed to be a shock to him. He looked so shaken, so upset. And he looked like he was going to cry. I wonder if he was able to convince him after that… but, I guess after the first time he might not dare to try again. 

Tenn-nii was always so strong… he probably forced himself to be, because of me. But because of that, at bad times, he would often find himself in a bind and not know what to do. 

Yesterday, the usually-strong Tenn-nii looked weak to me for the first time. 

That was a shock to me, more than Sorata's outburst had been. 

But I know that there was nothing that I could do for him, other than hope that things would turn out right for him. 

At least work was over now, and I did not have to stay back to look after the children since today was Tamaki's turn. However, it was still raining heavily, so walking home with this downpour was something I wanted to avoid. 

I was debating on hiding out at a cafe or somewhere nearby to let the rain pass when Iori called for me. "Nanase-san, there you are." 

"Iori, haven't you gone home with Manami-chan?" 

"I'm here too, Nana-sensei!" 

"I was going to, but there's someone at the gates looking for you so we came back to check if you were still around. Anyway, you better get going. It would be rude to keep him waiting." 

I was curious as to who it was so I rushed to gather my things and hurried out to meet that person. 

However, when I saw who it was I had some regrets. 

Yaotome... Gaku... 

"Yo, Nanase." 

"Yaotome-san, why are you here? Iori said you were looking for me..." 

"Yeah, I was. Do you happen to be free tonight?" 

"I am... why?" 

"I would like to talk to you for a bit if it's okay with you. Of course, not here in this terrible weather, but somewhere warm. Will the cafe at the corner of the station do?" 

Talk? 

About what? 

Perhaps... it was about Tenn-nii? 

"Yeah... that's fine with me." I agreed without thinking. 

To be honest, I was actually quite worried about how things would turn out. 

Yaotome-san led the way to the cafe. I followed behind him silently. Aside from the fact that the weather was not the best for a conversation, there was a strange tension in the air between the both of us. It was thick, so much so that one would need a sword instead of a knife to cut through it. 

The cafe he had brought me to was one that I had been to with Momo-san and Yuki-san before. It had opened last year and was an instant hit with the young people living in the area, but its popularity skyrocketed after being featured by a famous vegetarian food blogger. Aside from the coffee, they were also famous for their pizzas, which were baked in a wood-fired pizza oven. 

When we arrived, it was crowded, but were able to get a seat immediately. 

"We'll put in our orders first, then talk later." Was what Yaotome-san told me as he flipped open the menu to view the food selection. 

He decided on a pepperoni pizza and a cup of coffee. I also decided on pizza, the capricciosa that Momo-san had recommended me the last time I came, and coffee as well. 

After the waitress had left, Gaku looked straight at me. 

"Last night, I saw Tenn leaving the family restaurant, with his kid in his arms. I called out to him, but it seems like he didn't hear me since he seemed to be in a rush. After that, I saw you leaving after him, less than a minute later. Were the two of you together?" 

I did not expect him to start the conversation that way, but then again, he did not seem like one who would beat around the bush. 

"Yes, we were." 

"I see." He folded his arms, leaning into the chair. "I won't ask why or how that happened, but I just want to know what exactly is going on between the two of you." 

I do not know if this was how he usually was or was just trying to be intimidating, but surprisingly, I did not feel threatened at all. 

"There's nothing going on between me and Te—Kujou-san." 

"No, there certainly is. And you don't have to play dumb about your relationship; Tenn told me all about it. I know all about you being his younger brother, and also you being the father of that child." 

"Oh…" 

"You don't look surprised." 

"You're Tenn-nii's fiance, right? Since he has chosen you, I think that it's only natural to assume that he is able to trust and open up to you." 

"No, I don't think that's necessarily the case." 

"Why do you say that?" 

"Tenn did make a choice, but that choice did not necessarily have to be me." I could not understand what he meant by that until he continued speaking. "Our marriage was an arranged one. But rather than a marriage, you could say it was closer to being a business deal or contract of sorts. It just so happens that Kujou—the guy who took Tenn in—chose my father to be his business partner." 

"Does that mean that you and Tenn-nii didn't know each other before this?" 

"No, not really. We go a long time back. Before working under Kujou, when he was still pregnant, he used to help out at my grandparents' shop and lived with them. I first met him then. I still remember how scrawny he used to be, and quite the impertinent brat. The latter part has not changed a bit." 

"So, you feel nothing for Tenn-nii?" That was the conclusion I had drawn, but I carelessly let that question slip through my lips. 

"Hah? What nonsense are you talking about? Even if it was by the decision of my shitty father, I would not marry someone who I don't love." As expected, Yaotome-san does have that kind of feelings for Tenn-nii... "But, I'll be honest with you. I'm pretty sure that while Tenn has no qualms marrying me, he doesn't have the same feelings as I do for him." 

"How can you be so sure of that?" 

"You said that he trusts me earlier, didn't you? That may seem like it, but I don't think he does it completely. I can tell that he is still hiding a lot of things from me, including his own feelings. Even though we have slept together several times, I'm pretty sure that he doesn't love me." 

"But how can that be? That time, Tenn-nii said that he loves you, and even called you his lover..." 

"And you believe him?" 

"Is it wrong for me to do so?" 

"Do you know that even until now, Tenn has never once told me that he loves me? Whether it's on a date or in bed. If he really had feelings for me, then he would not have turned down my confessions to him... all three times." 

"Eh...?" 

"So that why I've always wondered if Tenn still had any feelings for his old flame... Sorata's father, whoever he is. I admit I had first mistaken you for that before knowing that you were his brother. But now that I know the truth, all the more I cannot shake off that feeling." 

"So you know what I did to Tenn-nii, too..." 

"Yeah, I do. I still think you were a damned bastard for doing that, too." 

It hurt to be insulted so directly, but I know I deserve it. 

"I know. I can't deny that what I did to Tenn-nii was beyond terrible and is unforgivable. I'd like to say that if I knew that I was an Alpha back then I may have been able to do something before the incident happened, but I don't think this can become anything but an excuse right now." 

"Wait. What exactly are you? An Alpha or a Beta?" 

"I've grown up thinking that I was a Beta, but only discovered recently that I'm actually an Alpha." 

"You didn't tell Tenn?" 

"No... I didn't. I was going to, but I missed my chance to." 

"No wonder he was so insistent that you were a Beta." Yaotome-san sighed again. "But, I hope you don't mind asking, what do you see Tenn as? To you, is he still your older brother? Just an Omega? A complete stranger? I don't know how close the two of you were as children, but I know that Tenn still holds strong feelings towards you." 

"I..." 

Should I tell him the truth? 

Yaotome-san is Tenn-nii's fiance. I did not like the sound of that, not because I had any dislike of him. It was because I was jealous, now that I can honestly admit it. 

But after hearing him talk, I could only consider him a person who is frank and honest, and humble. Not like other Alphas. He was just someone who spoke in a too-direct manner, but he never once looked down on me. Instead, he saw me as an equal despite how I was inferior to him in many ways. He is a good person, and I was fully made to understand that he will treat Tenn-nii well and is more than able to love and protect him and Sorata. 

Despite that, I refuse to accept him as Tenn-nii's partner. 

He is my rival, and since he was outright honest with me, I should return the sentiments and tell him the truth as well. 

"I love Tenn-nii," I spoke firmly, looking into his eyes. There was no need for hesitation. "But not in the way that family members do. What I feel for him is the same as what you do for him." 

"I see." He did not seem fazed by my answer. "So, what were your thoughts when you heard about our engagement?" 

"I didn't like the sound of it at all. However, I was still unable to accept my feelings for Tenn-nii then, so I didn't know how to react or what to do. But now that I do, it's much too late. Tenn-nii isn't one who would change his mind once he makes his decision. I don't know how he feels about me, about you, and the entire matter. I doubt he will tell anyone, too, since he has always been the type to keep things to himself even if he was troubled." 

"Yeah, that is the one thing I actually can't stand about him." 

"But, if I'm allowed to guess, there is only one thing that matters to him in his life." 

"Which is?" 

"Sorata. I'm sure that, to a parent, their child is everything to them. Back then, before Sorata was even born, Tenn-nii left home to protect him. He made many sacrifices just so that he could give birth and raise him. So I won't be surprised if he continued to value and put him before his own self. 

"Hoh... we were thinking of the same thing, huh?" 

"Eh?" 

"I had been wondering all this while, too, as to why he agreed to enter an arranged marriage with a person he coldly rejected three times. After I finally met his kid, I finally realised that the marriage to him wasn't about spending his life with a person he loved, or even for the sake of getting a husband. It was only to get a father for the boy." 

"Even so, you're still willing to marry him?" 

"Of course. That's how much I love him." 

"I see…" 

"But from what I've noticed about Tenn, he, towards you…" Yaotome-san continued but trailed off before he completed his sentence. "No… it's nothing. I shouldn't be jumping to conclusions." 

"Ahh…" I was curious to know what he had been thinking, but I chose not to inquire about it. 

Throughout the rest of the evening, our conversation continued, but on a much lighter note. Yaotome-san asked about stories of Tenn-nii from when he was a child, and I shared each precious memory with him. At some he laughed, others he made short comments. 

But, as I said, he is a good person. 

Now that I recognise that fact, I no longer have the confidence to say that I definitely can win against someone like him. 

Despite that concern, Yaotome-san said something strange when we left the cafe. 

"Please take care of them from now on." 

I thought he had meant that in a general sense, that I would treat them kindly and with consideration as the average person would. Seeing how I was related to the both of them and I was working in the kindergarten, it was normal of me to think this way. 

However, why was there an unsettling feeling that he might have meant something completely different? 

_"Chapter 16" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gaku says "Please take care of them" in the last part, which in Japanese is _yoroshiku_ (よろしく, or formally よろしくお願いします) which has many meanings (implied and direct) that I find it hard to explain in English without writing an essay about it. Please google it up if you don't understand Japanese.


	38. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, Sakuya's profile will be at the end.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Tenn's POV**

Today was Saturday… the day that Gaku and I would be officially married. 

Sorata barely spoke anything to me on Thursday night after our disastrous dinner and yesterday morning, which was the day after. Forget going to school, he even refused to leave the house. Because of this, I had to find someone to come over and look after him that day. Fortunately, Nagi, Mitsuki's husband, was available since he was working from home that day. I only had to make their meals in advance and leave them on the table to be heated up in the microwave. 

Anesagi-san arrived just after Nagi came by with his laptop, so I left Sorata in his care. 

Despite my busy schedule that day, which included the filming of a drama that I was to make a guest appearance in, I spent the whole day worrying about him. Fortunately, Nagi kept me updated about his activities via Rabbit Chat, so there was some peace of mind. 

When I got home later that day, I was surprised when Sorata came running to me in tears. I do not know what happened, but he apologised for what happened yesterday as he hugged me as tightly as he could. 

All I felt was relief, as I thought he had come to hate me, and I hugged him back. I told him that he did not do anything wrong and that I was the one who should apologise instead, asking for his forgiveness. He did, and I peppered his cheek with little kisses. 

Nagi left after our reconciliation. I asked if he said something to Sorata, to which he only gave a vague answer to. We both bid him farewell together, promising him that we will turn up at his birthday party on this coming Tuesday evening, on time. 

That evening, I made a quick and simple dinner of fried rice at home. We ate together, and Sorata told me about his day with Nagi. Turns out he did say something to my little one, to make him reflect on what he did the day before. After washing up and a bath we still had some to laze around, since it was not bedtime yet, so we put on a children's movie and huddled together on the couch. 

In the bath, Sorata told me that he will try his best to like Gaku more for my sake… something that made my heart hurt with guilt. I was at fault for making him think that way so I told him that, and that there was no need to force himself to like someone more than he already does. 

It was about one-third through the movie that he started nodding off. He already brushed his teeth after drinking a cup of milk after coming out of the bath, so I carried him to bed and tucked him in with a bedtime story. 

I decided to rest early as well, knowing that Kujou-san would arrive first thing in the morning, so I joined him under the covers after keeping everything in its proper place. 

Just as I had laid my head on the pillow, I received a message from Riku. He asked if Sorata was alright. I told him that he was, and there was no need to worry. I thought he would not continue the conversation after that, but he followed up with another message, this time asking if I was alright. 

I cannot say for sure that I was, but I did not want to worry him. 

After typing in a quick reply telling him that I was too, I sent it out and placed my smartphone on the bedside table. 

Closing my eyes, I soon fell asleep, only to wake up to the beeping of the alarm that I regularly set the next morning. Despite having slept for at least seven hours, I felt like I had woken up the moment I fell unconscious. I could still feel a bit of exhaustion lingering in my body, but I could not let that stop me from starting the day. 

Much to my surprise, despite it being something I was used to seeing on occasion, I found Kujou-san sipping his morning tea at the dining table, the morning papers in hand. 

"Good morning, Tenn." 

As I had yet to even go to the bathroom to wash up, I thought I was still half-asleep and had to do a double take. For a moment, I thought I was still dreaming and was in the middle of a nightmare. 

"Good morning, Kujou-san... What time did you return to Japan last night?" 

"A quarter past three in the morning. I had dismissed my secretary at the airport, so I had to take a taxi here. Because of that, I was slightly delayed. 

"I see..." 

Considering the time needed for him to travel from the airport to this apartment, that would have meant that he had reached home about an hour ago. 

"Is Sorata still sleeping?" 

"Yes, he is. I'll wake him up after I'm done making breakfast." 

"If you don't mind, I would like to request for a Japanese breakfast. I have had quite enough of western-style food." 

"I should have the ingredients for them, I believe. I'll go freshen up, so I would need a bit of time before I started cooking." 

"No worries." 

If I recall, I still had eggs and some mackerel fillet leftover, as well as some of the pickled vegetables Ryuu gave me from his hometown. I usually made more western-style dishes at home, so there was definitely enough dried fish flakes and miso paste for a soup. 

After getting freshened up and changed out of my pyjamas, I put my apron on and went into the kitchen. First was the rice, which I washed and set it to cook. After that, I examined the fridge. Indeed there was plenty stocked up, and everything I believe we had in there were available. There were even scallions and a half-used block of tofu I could use for the soup. 

I made the soup first, as it could be reheated later. That was followed by the fish, which were pan-grilled and glazed with teriyaki sauce, which was readily available. Last but not least were the rolled omelettes. Kujou-san liked his salty, so I made his potion first. I preferred mine sweet, and so did Sorata, so I made an extra large one for the both of us to share. 

But as I was setting the table, Kujou-san made a very sudden announcement. "I'll go wake Sorata up." 

Oh no. 

"Kujou-san, I don't think that's a good idea. Let me wake him up later..." 

"No, it's fine. You're already busy preparing breakfast. This is the least I could do rather than just sit around and wait." 

"But Sorata..." 

"It'll be fine. Trust me." 

This was going to turn into a tragedy. I just know it would. However, when Kujou-san is that insistent on the matter, he will not be convinced otherwise. 

I could only prepare for the hell that was to come. 

"NOOOOOOO! MAMA! MAMAAAAAAA!" 

Sorata's cry was on cue, and I went into the room. 

Kujou-san was standing by the bedside. While the smiling expression on his face had yet to change, it was more than obvious that he was hurt by Sorata's outright rejection. 

"Mama! Mama! The big, bad demon king is going to eat Sorata! Help!" 

He reached out to me and I held him in my arms. "Hush now, dear. That's not the demon king; that's Kujou-san." 

The origin of this situation was more amusing than one would think. 

It happened less than two years ago when Sorata was three years and a few months old. At that time, he had just become interested in hero shows on television, to the point that he begun to imitate their actions and words. However, the show's nemesis, which was a demon king, happened to look exactly like Kujou-san. Because of this, it seemed that Sorata had mistaken him for being that character. Kujou-san, at that time, did not help the situation by playing along and claiming that he was the real demon king, which scared Sorata badly and he had become frightened of him ever since. 

I had thought that this would not be an issue now that he was a little older, but it seems that he had yet to get over it. 

"Kujou-san, you already know that this is how he would react to you. Please don't tease the poor child like this." 

"I apologise..." 

"Your portion of breakfast is on the table, so please eat first. I'll get Sora washed up before joining you." 

"I understand." 

Sorata was still frightened, probably because Kujou-san was the very first thing he saw this morning. I did tell him that he was coming back, but it seems that this child had not made the association between his name and the man himself yet. Part of the reason for this is how seldom Kujou-san is at home. 

After getting him to finally calm down, I carried him to the bathroom to help him get ready for the day. However, he was still quite fidgety when he saw Kujou-san at the dining table and seemed uncomfortable sitting at the same table as him. It was cute how conscious he was of him, although it took some convincing that he would not be eaten by the 'big bad demon king' because I had already fed him food with magic that will make him full for a day. 

After breakfast, Kujou-san had to leave for meetings with his several of his long-time clients. He had reminded me of the arrangements for the late afternoon, which was the signing of the documents followed by dinner in the evening. 

Right after the meeting with President Yaotome several days ago, I had arranged for the fitted suit that I had hanging in my closet to be cleaned and ironed. Kujou-san had it made for me when he had adopted me, but I had not worn it in a very long time. Anesagi-san helped me with that and would be bringing it over to Ryuu's place, where I had intended to be at before leaving for the restaurant. Lunch and the preparations for later today will be done there. 

While I was out, Sorata would be taken care of by Sougo-san, as today was his usual playdate. I would pick him up after everything has been settled. 

This morning, after washing the dishes, there were the usual chores to do. Today was just vacuuming the floor and the laundry, the latter in which Sorata enjoyed helping me with the most. After putting the clothes to wash in the machine, we took down the clean laundry together. Sorata was able to fold some types of clothes by himself, although he took a longer time than an adult like me to do so. What he could fold were mostly T-shirts, towels and handkerchiefs, so I separated them out and left those to him. 

I was done with the remainder in less than five minutes. As the laundry was not done, I started on the vacuuming. I only finished Sorata's and my room when the machine beeped, and I took a break to hang the clothes on the balcony before continuing. 

Sorata was done about the same time I was. I decided to take a shower to freshen up, so I left him to pack his bag to bring to the Tsunashis. 

We left home less than an hour after that, and by the time we reached it was about time for lunch. 

Sougo-san made curry for lunch, accompanied with a side of breaded pork cutlets and shredded cabbage. 

I knew he liked spicy food, but because the children were still young he made the mild variety. It was always amusing to see how much spicy sauce he would add to his own portion to make it suit his taste. Ryuu usually adds a little bit of that sauce, while I eat it as it is like the children do. 

After Anesagi-san arrived, it was time to prepare. 

For the signing ceremony, both Anesagi-san and Ryuu had both been invited to serve as witnesses. The former arrived all dolled up for the occasion, but Ryuu could only prepare after he was done with me. 

Fortunately, there was not much to do today, aside from some simple touch-ups to my hair and some light make-up to look presentable. This, as you may have guessed, was also upon the request of Kujou-san. 

Since today was a private occasion and not the official solemnisation, a simple formal suit was enough. I remember the mention of white tuxedos during the meeting, but those would be part of the preparations for the ceremony, which will begin after today. 

Sorata gave both me and Anesagi-san a big hug before we left the house. We were a bit early, but it was definitely better to be early than otherwise. 

The three of us took Anesagi-san's car. Ryuu sat beside him, while I had the backseat to myself. The two in front were engaged in conversation, but I chose to not to join in, watching the scenery outside the vehicle go by instead. 

"Tenn, are you alright? Perhaps you're feeling nervous?" Ryuu asked me, noticing how quiet I was. 

"I suppose." 

More than nervousness, it was probably a completely different feeling altogether. 

It was a mix of dread, remorse, a bit of lament… a nagging feeling that something was missing from my life, and it was terribly awful. 

But it is far too late to back out now. All I can do is to hold my head up high, with my chest out proudly and continue walking the path I have chosen. 

If there is only one thing I regret, would be that even at this moment, I was still unable to love Gaku from the bottom of my heart. 

_"Chapter 17" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Character Profile: Sakuya**
> 
> Name: Tsunashi Sakuya (十 咲夜)  
> Age: 6  
> Birthdate: 15th April 2015 (assuming that Tenn was born on 9th July 1997 and that the Idolish7 timeline is in 2015)  
> Eye colour: Brown  
> Hair colour: Gold  
> Height: 106 cm  
> Weight: about 18.4 kg
> 
> Notes:
> 
>   * Sorata's childhood friend, best friend and, in the future, mate. This would mean that his secondary-sex results would show that he is an Alpha. 
>   * Takes after his father more than his mother in appearance and height. In the future, he would grow up to 191 cm. He also seems to take after his father more in personality as well. 
>   * Closer to his father than his mother and is scared of the latter. 
>   * First met Sorata as an infant, when Sougo brought him along to visit Tenn and his newborn at the hospital. Although he was still learning to speak proper words then, he babbled and reached out to Sorata as if calling for him. 
>   * Despite looking like he is the type of person who is quick to anger, he does not flare up easy and is very patient. However, he is very prone to jealousy, only when it comes to Sorata. 
>   * Athletic and good with all kinds of sports. By the recommendation of his father, he picked up soccer with the neighbourhood association in elementary school and continued it since then. 
>   * Has a very carefree personality and doesn't like troublesome things,like studying. That is why he does not score well despite being smart. 
>   * Because he is smitten, to the point of borderline obsession, with Sorata, many see that as the reason why he became an idiot. He genuinely loves Sorata with all his heart and mind, and his childhood dream was to make him his bride. 
>   * Despite how he looks, he is very protective of his younger siblings. He once got into a fight with his seniors for plotting to bully his younger brother Haruto and was suspended from school for a week. 
>   * Favourite food is curry, not just Japanese but all kinds as he handles spicy food well. He dislikes liquor (due to his parents), bamboo shoots, okra and natto. 
>   * Has an extreme fear of dogs after being bitten by one when he was a child. However, his greatest fear is Sorata hating him or ignoring his existence. 
>   * His first proper word was "Sora", much to his parents' chagrin (they thought it was "Sou") 
>   * Has never caught a cold in his life. 
>   * Surprisingly good at Origami. 
>   * He proposed to Sorata when he was four after attending his father's brother's wedding. Sorata did not take that seriously since they were children, but Sakuya did. He proposed to him properly at the beginning of their second year of middle school. 
> 



	39. Chapter 18A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"Oh." 

Just as we had gotten out of the car at the carpark near the restaurant, we bumped into Gaku and his father. 

The three of us first greeted President Yaotome, who stated that he would be going to find Kujou-san after returning it. Anesagi-san followed him, leaving Gaku, Ryuu and me by ourselves. It was still a bit too early to enter the restaurant, so we found a place at a nearby coffee shop for drinks and a chat. 

"I haven't seen the both of you in a suit for a while," Gaku commented, sipping on his coffee. "Ryuu was during that formal dinner last Christmas, wasn't it?" 

"Yeah, the one organised by the talent school, wasn't it?" Ryuu continued stirring his latte, waiting for it to cool down before drinking. 

As for me, I was having a cup of warm lemongrass tea. 

"It was. As for Tenn... since your debut?" 

"Only for this particular suit. I believe I had to wear them for several jobs over the years?" 

"If I'm right, I believe the most recent one was the cologne from that German brand?" As expected of Ryuu, he would remember. "And before that, it was for Murasame's autumn collection..." 

"I think I saw those before. But I don't believe I've seen that necktie before..." 

"Anesagi-san gave it to me as a present for my birthday last year. I didn't have a chance to wear it until today." 

"I see." 

I was wondering why we suddenly talking about our suits, the way a bunch of girls were talking about fashion. But the way that we were hanging out like this, in a way that makes us seem like friends more than anything else, makes me strangely comfortable. I suppose that is why I could spend time with Gaku so often, despite not having any special feelings for him. 

But I suppose a friend, or at least a fellow human being that I can get along with, is all he will be to me. 

Just as I was thinking of Gaku, my eyes unconsciously shifted over to him. That was when I had noticed that he was looking at me silently from where he had been sitting across the table. 

"Gaku, is something the matter?" 

"No, not really?" 

"What, Gaku, are you nervous too?" 

"Hah? Like hell, I would be." 

"Really? So it's just me who's getting the feeling of butterflies in my stomach?" 

"Wait, why the hell are you the one getting nervous? It's not like you're the one getting married... besides, you already tied the knot ages ago, didn't you?" 

"I mean, how can I not be? My two good friends are getting married to each other, and I was asked to be a witness to that. I wonder if it's really okay to have me take on such an important role..." 

Well, I appreciate the sentiment. Speaking of which, how're things with your precious 'wife' going?" 

"Things have been going well. Sougo gets a bit ansty if he doesn't have something with my scent around, especially at night or when he tires himself out." 

"Ahh..." I remembered having the same feeling when I was pregnant but was unable to act on that instinct. "So he's been nesting?" 

"Yeah. Thanks to that, I come home to find most of my dirty laundry ends up on our bed." 

"Wow. Including your underpants?" 

"Yes. Not only that, his cravings this time are quite strange. Well, to me it was more normal than the time he had been pregnant with our second. But because it's him, it can't be anything but weird." 

"Hehh... So? What did he crave the last time?" 

"Whole pieces of sour cream and onion-flavoured tortilla chips stewed in corn potage soup." 

"And during the first?" 

"Sweetened pickled radish soaked for three hours in black coffee." 

Gaku looked completely bewildered by what he had just heard. "So... what is he craving this time?" 

"Chiraga." 

For some reason, Gaku spat his coffee out. It was so hilarious that I had to snort at him. "That's completely normal, isn't it?!" 

"That's what my mom said too when I asked for her to send us some from back home. But the strange thing is, he actually said he disliked it when I first brought him to my hometown." 

"Hmmm... What about you, Tenn? Did you have this kind of weird cravings when you had Sorata?" 

I did not think the flow of the conversation would go my way. "Me?" 

"Yeah. You. Who else amongst the three of us here is an Omega and had been pregnant before?" 

"I don't think mine was that weird, per se. I kept wanting to eat pancakes..." 

"That's normal, isn't it?" 

"... with loads of banana ketchup." 

"What the hell is that? I mean, does it even exist?" 

"It does. It was something Kujou-san brought home with him as a souvenir." 

"Hmm..." Gaku did not seem convinced, but that was the kind of person he is so I let it slide. "By the way, Ryuu, how many years have you been married? Five?" 

I decided to let the two continue their conversation while I just listened in. Sometimes, when two Alphas talk, you just do not feel right butting in. 

"It'll be almost six years. We celebrated our fifth-anniversary last year. Although, Sougo prefers to count our mating anniversary over our wedding one." 

"You guys mated long and had your kid before you got married, after all. But six years and three kids, huh... that's quite an accomplishment. So? What kind of presents do you usually get him for your anniversaries?" 

"More than gifts, he prefers for us to spend time together. That's why for our anniversaries I've been taking him out to dinner or on dates." 

"With or without the kids?" 

"Depends on whether Sougo wants them to come along with us. But for our fifth wedding anniversary, my mom came over to Tokyo and booked us a suite room at her husband's hotel as a present for us. She even volunteered to stay over at my house to watch Saku and Haru." 

"Hoh. Bet things got hot and steamy." 

"Well," Ryuu blushed, in a manner that was rather unbecoming of a man his stature. "You could say it did when the alcohol got to him." 

"Ah." Both Gaku and I were aware of how terrible a drunk Sougo-san was so he did not need to say anything else for us to understand or imagine what may have possibly happened. 

"But, Sougo did say that there was something he wanted. Although, I'm not sure if he said it due to the influence of the alcohol or if he really meant it." 

"Which was?" 

"A daughter. He said that we would have to keep making children until he finally gets one. I wonder if our house can even fit so many people..." 

I put my hand on his right shoulder. "Good luck, dad." 

Gaku did the same but on his left. "Work hard to make your darling happy, dad." 

"Why do the both of you only in unison when you're being mean to me?!" 

At that time, we received a call from Anesagi-san saying that the preparations were ready. We left the coffee shop for the restaurant immediately. 

Our arrival signalled the arrival of everyone except the lawyer, who arrived just on time for the ceremony to begin. 

On my side, Kujou-san served the position of a close relative. while Anesagi-san was my witness to this ceremony. On Gaku's side, he had his father, President Yaotome, present and Ryuu as his witness. The lawyer was present as a representative of the law, and to give a briefing of sorts to ensure that we are aware of the implications of being married and to answer any questions pertaining to legal matters. I am not sure if everyone else had been paying attention, but I only listened absent-mindedly. 

As there was none, the next step would then be the signing of the documents. 

I was the first to fill in my section of the wedding registration form. However, I paused for a moment before putting the pen to the paper. It was like a thought had formed, but disappeared as quickly as it had taken shape. 

"Tenn, is something the matter?" 

"No, it's nothing. I apologise, Kujou-san." 

I filled in all applicable areas and finished with stamping my personal seal. The slip of paper was then passed to Kujou-san who did up his portion as well. 

This was then passed over to the other party... the Yaotomes. 

I closed my eyes, letting out a small sigh. 

With this, my fate is sealed... or so I thought. 

"Gaku, what the hell do you think you're doing?!" 

No one expected this turn of events. Not even Kujou-san, who had a keen eye and good foresight. 

When I opened my eyes upon hearing President Yaotome's yell, I saw that the marriage registration form, which had been passed to Gaku, was torn in half. Now, it was in shreds. 

"Gaku!" 

"What are you thinking, you stupid man!" 

Both Ryuu and Anesagi-san did not stay quiet, either. However, I was so shocked that I found myself speechless, unable to say anything. 

"What is the meaning of this, Yaotome Gaku-kun?" 

Only Kujou-san was still able to remain calm in this situation. However, I could see a slight glint of rage in his eyes. 

Despite the way everyone else in the room was looking at him, mostly in disbelief, Gaku remained unfazed. 

"I'm calling this engagement off." 

That statement was sudden and unexpected, and was definitely the last straw for his father who would have flown into a rage if Anesagi-san had not intervened. Amongst the flurry of voices and activity, my attention was only focused on Gaku, who walked over to me and took me by the hand. 

"Come with me." 

He did not give me time to consider nor an option to refuse. He simply dragged me by the hand and brought me away from everyone, from the establishment. 

Just what is going on?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My colleague told me about banana ketchup which her kids fell in love with during her family trip. I'm curious about how it tastes since I love regular tomato ketchup.


	40. Chapter 18B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

"Gaku, stop. You're pulling me too hard." 

It had been about fifteen minutes since we left the restaurant and everyone else behind at the ceremony. This entire time, we had just been walking through the city, Gaku pulling me by the hand and leading me to wherever he was bringing me to. That is if he had a destination in mind and was not just blindly dragging me around. 

However, his grip was quite tight, so it really hurt after being pulled this while. 

"Gaku!" 

Despite that, it seems like he was not listening to me at all, so he left me with no choice but to yank my hand from his iron grip. 

When I did, he finally noticed that I had been scowling at him the whole time. 

"S-Sorry..." 

"Do you even know what you are apologising for?" 

"Well..." 

He was looking unusually down and troubled, and that made me feel somewhat uncomfortable It was not every day that the always-confident Gaku would look so bothered and insecure. 

"Tenn, listen, I—ah." 

Just as he seemed to begin speaking, it started to rain again. And it was not just a drizzle, but a complete downpour. 

We quickly ducked under the awning of the closest building, a two-story cafe. 

"Looks like the rain won't be letting up soon, huh." I sighed, wiping the droplets from my hair and suit jacket. "What shall we do? Thanks to you, I don't have my wallet or smartphone on me." 

"We'll just have to wait until the rain lightens, I guess." 

It was then that I felt my stomach rumble. It seemed like that was the case for Gaku too, and his was actually audible. 

I had to make a comment about that. "What are you, a kid?" 

"Well, it's not like I can help it. On the bright side, we were pretty lucky to be stuck at a cafe. They should have some stuff to eat, so let's go in and order something." 

"I already said that I don't have my wallet on me, didn't I?" 

"Yeah, I heard you the first time. Just get Ryuu to take your things with him since you're going to his place to pick the kid up later. I'll pay for your portion first, so just return me the cash later." 

"You could have offered to treat me, at least." 

"I would've considered if you weren't this thick-skinned." 

When we entered the cafe, we were quite surprised to see it was empty. The waitress who showed us to our seats, the only member of the wait staff that I saw on the floor, explained that they had just opened for dinner when the untimely downpour began. We put in an order for hot drinks to warm our bodies up before deciding what to eat. Much to my surprise, there was a vast selection of dishes available compared to other places. 

Gaku, being Gaku, went for meat: the beef steak plate. I asked the waitress for her recommendation, which was the omelette souffle curry with rice, and decided to have that. 

But once the matter of food was settled, having had our fill, it was time to get back to matter at hand. 

"Gaku, explain yourself." 

"Regarding?" 

"What happened earlier, during the ceremony. What do you mean by you're calling the engagement off?" 

"Ahh, that. It's just as I had said. I'm calling the engagement off." 

"But why? Wasn't this what you wanted?" 

"But it was not what you wanted." 

"My thoughts and opinions are irrelevant to this matter." 

"You're wrong." 

"You're not making any sense.." 

"Listen, will you? To me, loving someone means making and seeing them happy. Even if it meant letting them go." 

"I still don't understand what you are trying to tell me." 

"Tenn. You think that you're good at hiding things from people, but you're surprisingly easy to read, you know? Did you think that I wouldn't notice that what you felt for me wasn't love?" 

"You're spouting nonsense. Why would you think I would willingly sleep with you if I didn't think of you as someone special?" 

"Indeed, you may see me as someone considerably special. But your notion of 'special' isn't the same as mine. You only see me as a friend at the very most, am I wrong?" 

"I..." 

Gaku is right. That was why I was unable to deny what he had been saying. 

"Stop lying to yourself, you idiot. The person who you love isn't me. I and this entire farce of an engagement was simply something convenient for you. It was a win-win situation for both of us: my unrequited feelings for you would have finally borne some fruit, be it a half-rotten one, and you could get your son the father figure he never had." 

"If you know that, then why did you decide to call it off?" 

"Simple. Because the person you love is not me." 

"Then, pray tell, who is it, then?" 

"Nanase." 

"Eh?" 

"The person you are in love with is Nanase Riku, isn't it?" 

He knew...? 

But, how? 

I am sure that I did not let it show in my words and actions... 

"Don't... Don't be ridiculous. Riku's my younger brother. We share the same blood. We're family. There's no way... it's wrong." 

"I told you to stop lying, didn't I? And who the hell decided that it was wrong? You yourself? That adoptive parent of yours? The law? Society? To hell about rules and public opinion and all that. When are you going to stop following what others say and start thinking for yourself? You're an adult and a parent, damn it. You have the right to choose what is right and what is wrong, regardless of what others say or believe." 

"But..." 

"Despite what he had been to you, and what he did in the past to hurt you, you still found yourself romantically attracted to him." 

"Riku was never the one at fault for that incident. The one who hurt him was me." 

"Hmm... Despite looking different, the two of you are so alike that it's laughable." 

"What do you mean by that?" 

"Nothing much, really?" 

"Anyway, I'm sure Riku doesn't see me the way I see him, so let's drop this topic." 

"How can you be- so sure about that? I bet you haven't asked him directly or talked about that, have you?" 

"I said drop the topic, Gaku." 

"Nuh-uh." 

I could only sigh. "Why are you so insistent about the things that go on between me and Riku? It really isn't any of your business." 

"It is. I said earlier that your happiness means everything to me, didn't I? I want you to find your happiness. That matters the most to me. Even if you say that I am being a bother, or annoying or meddlesome, this is my will and wish. You've sacrificed so much for others and hurt yourself enough. This time, I want you to be honest with yourself, and be happy." 

This man... how is it that he can say something like this with a straight face? 

"Is it really okay with you, Gaku?" 

"I already made up my mind. You're not the only one around here who has the right to be stubborn." 

"But, towards me..." 

"I'm not that selfish a man that will make you suffer just so that I could keep you by my side. Do I look like someone who would fulfil my wants and desires at the expanse of another person's?" 

"Of course not. You're a good guy, Gaku. Albeit one who is a bit too frank." 

"Are you praising or insulting me?" 

"I'm praising you. But... thanks, I guess. And, I'm sorry." 

"Don't apologise, silly." He patted my hair and ruffled it, messing it up. 

I protested to it, but all he did was to laugh in return. 

By this time, the rain outside had left up, but it was dark out. There were also more people in the cafe now. I was starting to get worried about Sorata, but as I did not have my phone I could not check up on him. 

"Ah." I heard Gaku mumble as he glanced at his. "You should go." 

"Huh?" 

"Ryuu and Anesagi are here." 

"How... and why?" 

"I sent a message to Ryuu. Your things are with him and they'll take you home. I bet you're dying to run home and give your precious son a hug, so hurry up and run off home. I'll pay the bill before going off." 

"Right... well, I'll see you around." 

"Yeah. See you." 

I picked up the suit jacket that hung over the backrest of my seat and left. 

In the car, I heard from Anesagi-san about had happened after Gaku had dragged me off... well, he was grumbling more than anything else. Ryuu, on the other hand, asked what had happened, but I did not feel like telling him, so I did not. If he really wanted to know. he would have asked Gaku instead of me. 

To be honest, I still do not know how to react or deal with the way things have progressed. 

But Gaku was right. 

I have to talk to Riku. 

I have to apologise to him: for hurting him in the past, for not trusting him, and for hurting him in the present as well. After that, if he is still willing to forgive me after all that had happened, I will tell him about my feelings. 

To be honest, I do not think that I am prepared for it at all. But I have to try. 

For the sake of Gaku, who sacrificed his own future. For Sorata, who I have sacrificed so much for. For Riku, who I had hurt deeply by my own selfish choices. 

And most importantly, for myself, so that I may be able to redeem myself and get another chance. 

_"Chapter 18" end_

**\- to be continued -**


	41. Intermission 4: "If you love him, let him go"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't prepare anything for White Day because I was struggling with Chapter 19's contents. Instead, have an early update.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Gaku's POV**

I was still in University when I first met him. 

He was eighteen, and I was twenty-two. At that time, I had only left a few months of being a student and was due to work in my father's company upon graduation. With my path in life set for me, all I had to do was to maintain my grades and attendance until spring. 

During winter, especially during the first few and last two months of the year, my maternal grandparents' soba shop will be more crowded than it would be during the rest of the year. Much to the displeasure of my typical-Alpha father, whom my mother (who was also an Alpha) had divorced when I was still young, I spent all my free time by volunteering. 

It was during this time that I first met Nanase, later Kujou, Tenn. 

The first impression of him was that he was a beautiful person. As far as appearances go, I have not met anyone that I felt was as attractive as he was. It was like comparing a celestial being to a human being. From his sweet scent, I could tell that he was an Omega, but there was another softer scent that underlay it. I later learnt from my grandmother that it was because he was with child and that he was living with them and working in the shop because he had run away from home. 

That news surely shattered my first impression of him. 

The first thing I had felt was disappointment. I began to draw my own conclusions about him, thinking that he was like those filthy Omega sluts I have seen throughout my schooling years, who would sleep with anyone and valued sexual pleasure before anything else. I began to see him the same way I did them: as a person with no morals or sense of shame. I also began to treat him as such. 

Looking back, it was something I had regretted. It was wrong of me to have made conclusions about him without getting to know him better. 

But no matter how badly I treated him, or what kind of insults I threw at him, he never responded to them. He continued working and doing what he had been, his will never once wavered. I saw it as him being annoyingly stubborn and it only made me more irritated, as it made him seem like more of a terrible person in my eyes. 

However, there was one incident that I had said too much and he actually responded to it. 

I admit I was acting like a brat despite being the adult. But the moment I saw his tears of anguish, I knew that I had the wrong impression of him all this while. 

"You may insult me all you want," He growled at me, grabbing my collar as if to threaten me. "But don't you dare say anything about my children." 

Until I met him, I did not think that a human being could be that strong. 

Surely it was hard, choosing to leave home and survive out in the large world when one is not yet ready to leave their parents' side. All the more so if you were an Omega, due to the discrimination that they face. It must have taken a lot of courage, and some sort of circumstance that had led him to have made that choice. 

After being scolded by my mother and grandmother for having made him cry, I spent time reflecting on my actions and was aware of how much of an ass I was. But while doing so, I also realised the reason why I had been so upset after learning about him. 

I had been attracted to him. Not just to his looks but him as a person. Not only does he work hard, but he was still able to put a smile on his face each day. It sounded simple, but it was not something that everyone can do. 

However, he disappeared before I could get the chance to apologise to him. 

No one knew where he had gone. All I was told was that he had been taken in by a man, whose name nor contact details were not left behind. I grew to hate myself at that time. If I had just been less of an ass, I would not have hurt him the way I did. And it was of baseless assumptions, too. How stupid was I, really, to have let myself believe that he was like all the rest? 

That day, I prayed the hardest I did in a long while, that I would be able to meet him again. 

When I did, it had been two and a half years later. 

My father had informed me that a business partner had entrusted to us a new talent and I would be in charge of them. This was not unusual, as I was in charge of etiquette pertaining to all aspects of the entertainment world. However, because he was to be a model, that would usually be left to his modelling instructor. 

Naturally, I protested against my father's arrangement until I was told of the reason: the new talent was an Omega Courtesan and a popular one amongst the upper Alpha circles of the country. One wrong move or word would mean trouble. Not just for the individual, but for the agency as well as the said business partner who this talent was affiliated with. 

I was given an envelope with his personal details and swiftly dismissed. 

You could imagine what a surprise it had been when I saw the face captured in the photograph attached to his profile. 

At first, I was confused, as he bore a different surname. But despite only having known him for a month at most, I knew I would not be unable to mistake him for someone else. 

From what I heard, he had already begun his modelling lessons with his designated instructor, Anesagi Kaoru, who had been a former model himself. Anesagi was a colleague that I had been close to, so I asked him about him. Unfortunately, he did not speak much about himself and I could not get much information. 

Despite that, I had the fortune of running into him the next day. He had been walking down the corridor as I left my classroom after a session, and we bumped into each other. He seemed to have recognised me and tried to run away, but I stopped him. 

I apologised to him for what I did and said to him in the past, and he forgave me. However, perhaps it was because he seemed more beautiful than he had been back then, I accidentally let those thoughts out of my mouth as they ran through my head. 

Desperate to save myself from the embarrassing situation, I asked him to date me. 

I was flat out rejected. 

After that first failure, I found myself still unable to give up on Tenn. To be honest, I was upset by his initial rejection, but because of the time I got to spend with him, I found myself unable to let go of the feelings I had for him. 

I confessed again on two separate occasions: once around the time that he made his debut, and once when I was half-drunk at Ryuu's house party to commemorate the birth of his secondborn. 

As you would have guessed, he still rejected me. 

Despite that, my feelings for him continued to grow, even though we rarely got to meet. 

That was why when my father told me that he had arranged for me and Tenn to be engaged, I was overjoyed. 

At first, I was against the idea of an arranged marriage. My father had always been a person who believed that what he did was right, and never consulted my opinion on the matter. The moment I hit twenty-five years of age, he would not keep quiet about me having not found a partner. I was still smitten with Tenn, so I was unable to fall in love with anyone else. 

After the initial joy, I became worried that Tenn would turn down the engagement. Who would consider marrying a person who they had rejected thrice? But when I heard he agreed, I thought that he had finally given me a chance. 

However, that was not the case. 

Ever since our engagement, I was able to spend more time with Tenn. We found time in our busy schedules to have meals together, and even went on dates. He even invited me to his home to meet with his son. 

However, the more time I spent with him, the more I could feel a nagging discomfort in my heart. It was like I knew, subconsciously, that the fact that Tenn did not hold any special feelings for me did not change. That despite calling me his fiance and doing the things that lovers do, he did not see me the way I did him. 

I did not want to believe that, and I chose not to, clinging to the small glimmer of hope that Tenn had finally come to love me. 

I was well aware that his son, who I felt probably resembled his former lover more than him, meant the world to him. He would do anything for that child, even if it meant giving up everything he had. 

It made me wonder if Tenn only saw me as a potential father figure to the boy, more than a person he would call his partner. 

Turns out I was half-right. 

It was part of the truth, but that was not all there was to the matter. 

I only realised that when I met Nanase Riku. 

The resemblance between him and the child was uncanny. At first sight, I knew that he was the father of his son. However, because he bore Tenn's original family name, I was confused as to whether my suspicions had been on the dot. 

When I finally got Tenn to tell me the truth, I was shocked by what he told me. After that, I felt anger. Not so much with Nanase, but more at myself. 

If I had known the truth and how hard it had been for him, I would not have treated him so terribly in the past. 

However, looking at him talk about his brother brought up a new feeling. It had probably been triggered by the time that I had found the two of them in the classroom by themselves, but only took form as I learnt more. That feeling was, no doubt, jealousy. 

At first, I chided myself for jumping to such a strange conclusion. After all, they are siblings related by blood. It would be strange if they fell in love with each other. 

Despite that logical reasoning, I was still unable to shake off that feeling. 

The fact that Tenn always seemed bothered and distracted by something made it worse. However, I had known him long enough to realise that he was trying to reject his feelings, whatever they are, and was shouldering his problems alone. That made me realise that he did not trust me enough... that I was not someone who he could truly rely on. 

Not wanting to make assumptions again, I approached Nanase, to hear his true feelings. Although he looked like he would back out, he faced me head on, like a man would. 

After hearing his side of the incident, and his feelings, everything became clear to me. 

The one who Tenn needs by my side is not me. 

I am not the one who can truly make him happy, and bring him happiness. 

It is him. 

Despite having hurt the other person and each shouldering the blame by themselves, not blaming the other party even once, they are still attracted to each other. Their attraction, of course, was the romantic sort, and it was obvious. If I could realise it, Tenn must have as well. 

It was hard for me to accept that. 

It was like that old folk tale my grandmother used to tell me, about how a spider's thread from heaven descended down to hell. It was a small little flicker of hope. But it died down quickly, as fast as the thread had snapped. 

After spending the evening with Nanase, I spent the night thinking of what I should do. 

In the end, I came to one conclusion. 

I wanted Tenn to be happy. 

Even if it meant letting him go. 

When I was a child, I asked my mother why she had chosen to marry my father despite choosing to get divorced at the end. She told me that she loved him, but he did not love her in return. The person that he loved was someone else's. She believed that as long as she kept showing my father that she had loved him, he may come to return her feelings and they would be happy. But that was just her hanging onto false hope. They never found that happiness together. That was why she chose to let him go. 

At that time, I could not understand why she made that decision. But now, because I am an adult, I felt that she had made the right choice. 

I knew that if I had decided to go through with the engagement and get married to Tenn, it would likely end up the same way as my parents' marriage. I did not want for his child to go through what I had, but I did not want Tenn to suffer, either. If letting him go meant allowing him to find his true happiness, then that is the right thing to do. 

I had made my decision and had the will to see it through. 

Yet, why did it hurt so much to see him go? 

I could not help but feel tears well up in my eyes as I watched him walk away from me. There was heavy feeling in my heart, yet I somehow it felt like a huge load had been taken off my back. In a way, I felt like I had been freed from something that had burdened me for so long. 

It had been a long time since I felt like crying like this. Even as a child, I did not feel this sad when my parents divorced. 

Being heartbroken hurt more than I thought it would, but I know that it is something that will heal with time. I guess, right now, it is okay to feel upset and down... right? 

Just as I let out a sigh to relieve the weight on my chest, a slice of cake entered my vision. It was placed on the table in front of me, but I was sure that I did not order dessert... 

"I'm sorry, I didn't—" 

"It's on the house. Please accept it." 

To my surprise, it was a man's voice. Earlier, we had been served by a young lady... and this voice... why was it so familiar? 

I looked up at him and recognised his face immediately. 

"Nikaidou?" 

Nikaidou Yamato. He was someone whom I had considered a friend back in high school but had lost contact with after graduation. I heard some rumours about him, most of them nasty, but why was he here? 

"Yo. That was really cool of you, Yaotome." He gave me an awkward grin before taking a step back. "I gotta go back to work before I get yelled at, so I can't stay to chat." 

"But the cake..." 

"That one's a failure so you can have it. Like I said, free of charge. Well, I'm not sure what happened between you and that pretty boy earlier, but cheer up, okay? 

The cake he offered me was a lemon cake, and it was the sourest one I ever had. The taste of the lemon overpowered everything else, and I was tempted to spit it back out. But surprisingly, it began to taste gradually sweeter as I ate it, and before I knew it, I had finished the entire slice. 

All in all, it was terrible. 

Yet, I did not feel like crying anymore. Just like how the weight off my shoulders has been lifted, my chest felt lighter as well. 

The cake itself did not have the power to do something like this. 

Well, I guess that did not matter much. What was more important was that I now feel like I could do anything as long as I tried. 

Thanks, Nikaidou. 

I could not tell that to him directly, so I gave him a thankful glance on my way out. 

Hopefully, just as I had wished for Tenn to find his happiness, I, too, will be able to find my own as well. 

**- Intermission 4: "If you love him, let him go" end -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you thought I forgot about Yamato, no I didn't. I just had other plans for him.


	42. Chapter 19A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note 19/3/2018: I just realised I screwed up the dates. Nagi's birthday should have been on a Sunday, not Tuesday (I thought this story was set in 2023 but in actuality, it's 2021). I'll make the change later on after I finished the main story.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

Today was finally 20th June, the day of Nagi's 25th birthday party. I had been looking forward to it ever since Manami-chan passed me the invitation card about three weeks ago.

Fortunately, it was a Sunday but there was work tomorrow. Iori mentioned something about Mitsuki trying to make the party on the day before, but Nagi was insistent on the exact date, as per his country's customs. In the end, it seemed that Mitsuki had no choice but to give in to him. Because of this, I was offered to stay over at Iori's place, where the party was held, and a ride to work the next day, which I gladly accepted.

Iori still lives with his parents, and I had been to his place several times before. Up until the beginning of last year, Mitsuki's family, too, had been staying with them. However, they decided to get their own place nearby because they wished to give their daughter her own room and space to grow up.

I had packed my bag in the morning, making sure I had everything I needed for the night and the next day.

I could not help but smile when I remembered how Manami-chan was so excited about the party that she kept talking about it during playtime on Friday. It was then that I had learnt that not just Sakuya-kun's family had been invited, but Sorata's as well.

That would mean that Tenn-nii was, too.

I have not seen him since last week after Sorata had thrown a tantrum at the family restaurant. I had sent him messages asking if he and Sorata were alright. I thought he would have ignored them, but I received replies to each one.

While I was relieved that they were both alright and that things probably worked out in the end, there was a bit of a bitter feeling left behind. It got even more unpleasant after having met Yaotome-san last week.

On that night, if nothing had happened, I would have tried to talk to Tenn-nii again. At that time, I was positive that that chance was a blessing, and I was more than ready to take it. I would have tried again if I have not listened to Yaotome-san talk that evening. The more I knew about him, the more it made me lose confidence in myself and my ability to do anything for Tenn-nii.

Right now, I do not feel that I had the right to even be near them... Tenn-nii and Sorata, anymore.

How was he now, I wonder? Have the preparations for his wedding with Yaotome-san started? Seeing how it was decided around Golden Week, they should have submitted their marriage application form by now...

No, I should not think of things that would make me feel down.

Got to think of better things instead.

Speaking which, Sorata had apologised to me. He did not explicitly say what it was for, but I knew it was for that incident. He smiled when I said that I forgave him and patted his hair, saying that I was not angry with or hated him. He made me promise that I would have pancakes with him again, which I agreed to.

On the way to the party, I ran into Sougo-san and his children, as well as Sorata-kun and Manami-chan who had been left in his care. Apparently, Tenn-nii had to work so he and Ryuu-san would only be coming over later. Manami-chan was sent to Sougo-san's for a playdate because Mitsuki wanted some private time to prepare for the party. 

The children greeted me cheerfully when they caught sight of me, especially Sorata who gave me a hug. He then asked to hold my hand as we made our way to the party, which I did. 

"WELCOME, EVERYONE!"

When arrived, we were greeted by Nagi, who looked a dozen times happier than ever than he usually was.

"Daddy!" Manami-chan ran towards him and quite literally jumped into his arms. "Happy birthday!"

"Thank you, my dear princess!" He planted several kisses on her cheek, making her giggle.

"Daddy, that tickles!"

"Don't just stand there and block the doorway, you dumbass!" From behind Nagi, I could hear Mitsuki's voice. "Can't you see it's about to rain? Let everyone it before it does!"

Mitsuki and Iori's parents were not around, so we had the house to ourselves. It seems that the children would be spending the night here as well. Aside from Mitsuki and Nagi who would be using their old room, I was the only adult who intended to stay the night and was put up in the guest room. Of course, Iori still lives here, so he would be in his room.

After we settled into the house, we gave Nagi his presents. I am not sure what the others gave him because they were wrapped up, but I gave him a pair of cufflinks which I had Iori help me choose.

As expected of a party hosted by Mitsuki, there would be lots of food and a large cake prepared. The latter he probably made in the morning, so all that was left was the feast. Iori was put in charge of the decorations, while I helped Mitsuki in the kitchen. Nagi and the children were huddled around the television watching a Kokona movie, while Sougo-san sat behind them on the couch to keep an eye on them, holding Haruto-kun who was napping.

Iori went to take his bath after he was done, and Manami-chan got in with him.

Just as the food was about done, I heard the doorbell ring.

"I'll get it!" Nagi announced before anyone else could react, and made a quick zip for the front door.

I could hear him yell out his enthusiastic welcome again as I brought the food out to the dining table. Mitsuki grumbled something about how he would eventually get complaints about his husband being a public nuisance, and I could only laugh.

"Mitsuki, Ryuu and I bought the alcohol... oh."

I was carrying the fried chicken out when Tenn-nii suddenly appeared at the corner, carrying a grocery bag filled with canned beer in each hand. For some reason, the surprised expression on his face when he saw me was kind of adorable.

"Kujou-san, good evening." I greeted him, putting the plate on the counter. "Let me help you with that."

"Good evening. Thank you. Is there something I can help with?"

"Ah, you can take the food out!"

"I'll do that."

Leaving the dining table to Tenn-nii, I helped to put the beer in the fridge. It seems that he had bought already-chilled ones, as the cans were cold to the touch. Sougo-san's husband appeared a little while later, with wine.

That large amount of alcohol made me worry about how much everyone intended to drink tonight.

Iori had a policy to not drink on a weeknight, and so did I. It was not like I was bad with alcohol. I could hold my liquor well, but it made me unable to get out of bed in the morning. Mitsuki had intended to close his shop tomorrow so he would probably be drinking with Nagi, which was part of the reason why the pair intended to stay here instead of returning to their nearby apartment tonight.

Sougo-san was pregnant and not be drinking. Ryuu-san looked like he would be okay to handle alcohol well, but I am not sure about Tenn-nii.

"Mama!" I heard Sorata greet Tenn-nii cheerfully with a big smile, running up to him for a hug. He waited for him to put the plate he was holding down before getting that hug he wanted. "Mama, Sorata's hungry!"

"Me too!" Sakuya-kun seconded him.

"Me three!" Manami-chan followed, standing up to go into the kitchen. "Mommy, is dinner ready yet?"

"Almost! I'll be done by the time you turn the TV off and wash your hands."

"Okay!" She hopped out of the kitchen, doing as Mitsuki had told her to. She dragged both Sorata and Sakuya-kun to get their hands washed, and made sure that all the adults had theirs washed as well.

When we were done, it was time to eat.

But before that, we would toast to Nagi, as it was his special day. Those who were drinking had alcohol in their cups, those who were not had tea. For the children, fruit juices.

"Mitsuki, dear, would you give a speech before we eat?"

"Do I have to?"

"Of course! It's a very special day, after all."

"If you insist... ahem. I'd like to thank everyone gathered here for taking time off your busy schedules just to attend my stupid husband's 25th birthday party. It's amazing how little this idiot had changed for the eight years that I have known him and the seven that we've been married. Sometimes I still wonder if I got myself a husband or actually adopted a kid." I could not help but laugh at Mitsuki's sarcasm, and so did everyone else. "Well then, a toast to the man!"

"Happy birthday!"

"Thank you, Mitsuki... thank you, everyone... I love all of you! But! Before we eat, there's still one very important thing!"

"Cake!" Manami-chan finished her father's sentence.

"As expected of my princess, so smart! That's right! My darling Mitsuki spent the whole morning making it for me! And it's not just any cake! It's super special Kokona cake that Mitsuki designed himself!"

"H-How did you know?!"

"Ufufu... let's just say there are no secrets between me and our precious princess."

"So... can I light the candles already?" Iori, who was in charge of bringing out the cake, asked as he probably missed his cue to do so.

We sang Nagi a birthday song and he blew out the lit candle. After that, it was time for what everyone was waiting for: the food.

As the children were hungry, we made sure that they took their portions and started eating before we tucked in.

Mitsuki, Nagi and Ryuu-san, all with alcohol in their cups, sat together in the dining area as they chatted. I joined them as I ate my first plate of food, but I could barely catch up with their conversation after that and excused myself to see if there was anyone I could sit with at the living room. Iori was with the children, and so were Tenn-nii and Sougo-san. The only empty seat was the one next to them, so I had little choice but to take it.

"Kujou-san, may I sit next to you?"

"Go ahead."

His answer felt rather... strange.

He was just speaking normally and smiling at me in a friendly sort of way that people do. But unlike the past few times I had met him, he seems... softer, not as stiff or tense that he had been before. I was not just referring to just the tone of his voice or his posture… even the way he had looked at me was gentle.

I am not sure why he was acting like this, but it was definitely not due to alcohol. I could tell that he was drinking jasmine tea by the colour and smell.

Did something happen to him, I wonder?

As I tried to think of a reason and was not able to come up with one, it suddenly felt awkward to be sitting right beside him. However, it would be quite rude to move away after asking if I could sit next to him.

It did not seem like he was merely being happy about something. If anything, he appeared to at ease. Was it something related to Sorata? Maybe his work? If not… with Yaotome-san?

"Nanase-sensei? Are you alright?"

Just as I was pondering, Sougo-san spoke to me, looking a little worried.

"Ahh, I'm fine. I was just thinking about something. Was I spacing out?"

"It seemed like you did. I'm sorry to have interrupted you."

"Oh, it's fine. It wasn't anything that important."

"I'm glad."

Sougo-san smiled at me as he rubbed his baby bump, which made me remember what I had wanted to ask him. "That reminds me, Sougo-san, how many weeks along are you?"

"About twenty-four weeks. This child will be due around the end of September."

"Oh! Do you know the sex of the child?"

"Ryuu-san and I chose not to find out. We wanted it to be a surprise. That being said, he had already chosen names for the child."

"What are those names?"

"If the child is a girl, Yukari, which is the character the colour purple. If the child is a boy, Shizuki, which means purple moon. He chose them as the child would be born in autumn."

"Those are wonderful names. But I hope you don't mind if I ask, but how many children do you plan to have?"

"Oh, the thing about that... it seems that Ryuu-san mentioned something him doing his best for a daughter, so I think I'll have to keep going until I can give him one."

I was going to comment that, but I heard Tenn-nii choking on his drink.

"No, it's fine. Don't mind me." Was what he said when I turned to him, but I cannot understand why he sounded so amused.

What was I about to say… I forgot. It probably was not that important.

"Sougo-san, are you and Kujou-san close? Perhaps friends? I've been wondering since I was told you help to fetch Sorata-kun home from the kindergarten sometimes."

"You could say we are. I met Tenn-kun through my husband's work when he was still pregnant. At that time, I already had my firstborn, Sakuya, so he consulted me with a lot of things concerning his pregnancy and how to care for and raise a child. We became a lot closer after Sorata-kun was born. But because he was always quite confident, it was so cute how afraid and awkward he was when handling his son."

"Sougo-san!"

I could not help but chuckle, not at what Sougo-san said but because Tenn-nii's face had gone red. "I see!"

"But now that I look at your face closely, Sorata really does resemble you a lot, Nanase-sensei. If I did not know that you were a teacher at the kindergarten that day, I would have thought that you were his father. I apologise for the misunderstanding."

"No, not at all! If anything, he resembles Tenn-n—his mother more!"

When Sougo-san frowned, I was worried that he had noticed my slip of the tongue. However, at that time, I noticed Ryuu-san approaching us, and to my surprise, he tried to buried his face in Sougo-san's lap. If it was not for the baby bump, which I noticed Sougo-san used his hands and arms to instinctively protect, he may have been successful.

"Sougo-kun!" He called for him, in a manner that reminded me of a happy little puppy. "Sougo-kun, I 'ove yah! I reallah do! Marreh me!"

"Oh, my. Ryuu-san, you're drunk already?"

"Eh!?"

Was he not supposed to be a strong drinker?

"He may seem like he's good with his drinks, but Ryuu gets plastered really fast." As if he had been reading my mind, Tenn-nii explained to me what I was currently witnessing. "It's easy to tell. Once he starts speaking in his slurred dialect, you'll know he's completely gone."

"I-I see..."

"And that's not all. Depending on the day, he may start doing stupid things."

"Like?"

"There was once he started playing strip rock-paper-scissors with everyone in the room. On another occasion, he danced the macarena with his pants off. And sometimes, he sings."

"Sing what kind of songs?"

"That'll have to depend on who he is singing to."

"Sougo-kun! Tah show yah how m'ch I 'ove yah, Imma gonn' sing for yah!"

Oh...

"Since it's Sougo-san, he'll be doing some sort of romantic serenade. It's always the same song, so it's nothing special anymore. And if you think he's bad, you should see Sougo-san when he's drunk. You'll be in for a surprise." Tenn-nii sighed, standing up.

I thought he was going off to take more food since he took his plate with him, but I did not expect him to reach out his other hand to me

"If you don't mind, could we talk for a bit? Somewhere private, preferably."

"Dah dehgo flowah 'as bloorshomed—"

Ryuu-san began singing and I could hear the children laughing at him, but I paid little attention to them. All I could focus on right now was Tenn-nii. It felt as if there was only the two of us in this room. The smile on his face was the same as the one he wore back when we were still young, before we were torn apart by everything that had happened.

It made me feel happy, yet knowing that he would never be mine made my chest tighten uncomfortably. But right here and now, Yaotome-san is not here. It's just me and Tenn-nii.

And there is only one thing that I would do whenever Tenn-nii extends his hand to me.

That is, to take it.

"I have things to tell you, too. Lots."

"The evening's still young. Let's have a little chat, just like how we used to."

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ever since I did almost-daily posting for this series, I've been doing nothing but writing on weekends, days off work and after office hours. I'm starting to depend on coffee to get by and survive on, so I decided to create a ko-fi account.
> 
> Instead of other platforms, I decided that I'll announce my major projects and plans there, since it's for creators and their works. If you liked "Song of the Sun" so far, as well as my other works, why not [Buy Me a Coffee](https://ko-fi.com/Y8Y2AHSJ)?
> 
> Right now, I set up a goal for Ryuu and Sougo's back story, which is still in the planning stage, so I'll see how it goes from there. If you are interested, please consider helping me meet that! To note, the song Ryuu sings to Sougo is Shima Uta (because I couldn't think of any other Okinawan song on the go)


	43. Chapter 19B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

Despite agreeing to go with him, I felt like I was not ready to talk to him just yet. My heart was pounding, crazy fast, in my chest as I followed behind him. 

I looked around to see if anyone had noticed us. It seemed that no one did, as they were preoccupied with other people. 

We left our empty plates on the corner of the kitchen counter as we left the living-dining area. 

"Do you think we can go upstairs?" Tenn-nii asked as we entered the hallway. 

"Mitsuki said his parents are not in, so it should be fine. I'm using the guest room today, too, so we can talk there." 

"Fine by me." 

Now it was my turn to lead him up the stairs and into the room. I turned on the light and invited him, offering him a seat on the chair by the desk. However, he claimed he preferred the bed. Not only that, he asked for me to sit next to him, which I did. 

To my surprise, he shifted closer to me, so that our hands that were placed on the bed were almost touching. I could not help but blush as I caught a whiff of his scent: mild vanilla and rich honey, just I remember it. 

For the first few minutes, neither of us said anything to one another. 

I would have liked to start, but I did not know what to say. Or rather, what I should say. The awkwardness of the silence did little to help in that regard. 

But one of us had to start if not this conversation would not start. 

"You know, Tenn-nii—" 

"Say, Riku—" 

We both started speaking at the same time and had cut off after hearing the other person's voice. 

"You first." 

"No, it's fine. You go first, Tenn-nii." 

Somehow, this exchange was pleasantly nostalgic. 

Tenn-nii nodded in acknowledgement to my request for him to speak first. However, what he said was something that I never expected to hear. 

"Gaku broke off our engagement." 

Eh?! 

"Why?!" 

"I'm not sure what he had been thinking that may have driven him to do that, but if there is one definite reason, is that he saw through me. He knew that I did not accept the engagement for the same reason that he did, and that even if we were to get married I would probably not see or treat him as my husband, the way Sougo-san does to Ryuu. He knew that, even if he was able to my hand in marriage, he could not do the same for my heart." 

"I see..." 

So that was what Yaotome-san had meant when he asked me to take care of Tenn-nii and Sorata. 

I should be feeling sad and sorry for Yaotome-san, knowing how much he loves and thinks about Tenn-nii who did not think for him the same way, and it was as he had suspected. But I could not think of this news as anything but good. It meant that I now have a third chance. 

"You know, I always felt guilty. Not just about how I had treated him after all I had done for him, but how I have treated you as well. I hurt you in so many ways, in the past and in the present, and I know I cannot be forgiven for that." 

"Me? But, you did nothing wrong at all. If anything, I was the one who should be apologising." 

"No, you're wrong. It has always been me. If I had not been so afraid of my heats, I would not have tried to delay it. If I had known that you would get affected by it despite being a Beta, I would have taught you properly what to do. Since I had felt it coming, even though it was sudden, I should have done something before it had gotten out of hand. And that's just the beginning. I made many selfish choices, and each of them did nothing but cause you more pain and hurt." 

As he spoke, his expression grew more pained. I, too, could feel my chest hurt. However, it was only because I was seeing him hurt himself. 

"Tenn-nii, stop blaming yourself, please!" I placed my hand on his shoulder. "You really didn't do anything wrong at all! I'm the one who's in the wrong! Blame me instead!" 

"No, you're innocent." 

"I'm not! Tenn-nii is the one who's innocent. If there's anyone who needs to be blamed, let it be me! Back then, I was the one who lost control. If I didn't, I would not have hurt you… I never wanted to hurt you, but I was stupid and I did! I'm the one at fault!" 

"Riku, stop being so stubborn and just listen." 

"You're being as stubborn as I am!" 

"Why do you never listen when I tell you to?" 

"I could say the same to you!" 

Somehow, it feels like we have gone back to being children. We have not argued like this in a very long time, and rather than being angry at Tenn-nii, I am actually more amused at the entire situation. 

That was why I could not help but laugh, and Tenn-nii did the same. 

"Why are we so silly, arguing like this?" I wiped a tear from the corner of my eye, having laughed a little too hard. "It's like we back to being kids." 

"I suppose you're right. How nostalgic." 

"Tenn-nii, can I hold your hand?" 

"… Sure." 

I slowly and carefully put my right hand down and over his left, which was still placed on the bed. Once I could feel the warmth of his skin on my palm, I closed my fingers around that hand. This was what Tenn-nii used to do back when he held my hand whenever I was in the hospital. 

"Tenn-nii…" 

"What is it, Riku?" 

Finally, after so long, I get to touch him again like this. 

I got to smile at him like I used to, and he would look at me his with that gentle gaze. 

And, as if we had sensed what the other had intended to do, we moved closer at the exact same time so that our shoulders were brushing against each other. 

"Tenn-nii, I'm sorry. For everything I had done to you and had made you do. For all the bad memories and the pain that you had to suffer, and for all the nasty things I had made you go through. And… for not being by your side all this time. Would you forgive me?" 

"I do forgive you, Riku. Then, would you forgive me as well, for having hurt you with my actions and words? For the lies that I had told you, and for choosing not to trust in you. For being selfish and deceitful. Would you accept my apology?" 

"Of course I will." 

"Thank you, Riku." As he spoke Tenn-nii shed a tear, followed by many more. He turned his body towards me and hugged me tightly, much to my surprise. 

"Thank you for accepting me again, after everything I had done to you and what I have become. You don't know how much that means to me." 

At this point in time, I was nearly in tears as well. I hugged him back, wrapping my arms around him for the first time in years. I could not help but wonder if the Tenn-nii I had known had been this thin. We were the same height, but he felt small in my arms. 

"Thank you too, Tenn-nii. For choosing to protect Sorata back then, and continuing to love him despite what he is. And especially now, thank you for choosing to return to my side." 

Five and a half years. That was how long it had been since Tenn-nii had left home. Add a few more months, and that was how long it had been since I last touched or spoke to him like this. 

What should I do? I feel so happy that my heart cannot hold all of these happy feelings in. 

Tenn-nii... 

"I love you, Tenn-nii..." 

I love you so, so much... 

If it was possible right now, at this very moment, I could not ask for more than to make you mine. 

But, seeing how we just made up, I guess that would have to wait. 

**\- to be continued -**


	44. Chapter 19C

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Allow me to make this clear right here and now, but there will not be anything R-rated (lemons/smut/porn) in this main story of Song of the Sun. If any, there may be in "After Stories" (details to be announced on ko-fi later in the year).
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

I had been so focused on my own thoughts and feelings that I did not realise that I had said out whatever had gone through my mind until Tenn-nii suddenly pulled away from me, with a confused expression on his face.

"Is that true?" He asked, looking at me straight in the eye.

"Huh?"

"You just said that you loved me… is that how you truly feel, or something that you just said on the spur of the moment?"

Did... Did I let what I thinking slip out?

Certainly, I had intended to tell him my true feelings, but it did not have to be now. I had planned for it to be more romantic... not at a place or situation like this.

But that was not important now.

I had confessed my feelings to Tenn-nii… and he had asked about them. I am not sure why he did, but I have to reply to him and convey clearly that that was how I genuinely feel about him.

"I meant every word I said. I love you, Tenn-nii."

"But weren't you dating Izumi-sensei?"

"Iori? He's just a friend. Plus, it seems that he's seeing someone right now."

"But, the way the two of you are so close... I just thought..."

"He's just a big worrywart. We knew each other since University, after all, and I used to hang out at his parents' shop a lot to study when I moved here. But let's not talk about him, that's not important."

I reached over and held both of his hands, which he had placed on his lap, in mine.

He did not pull them away, which I thought he would do.

"Right now, this is about you and me, Tenn-nii."

"Riku..."

"Tenn-nii, listen. I've always been denying this, but I have been in love with you for quite a while. But, I was scared that you would reject me and had truly come to hate me because of what I had done to you. Not only that, we are twins... family members connected by blood. Many people would say that it's wrong… but so what if it is? It feels right to me, and I get the feeling that no matter what happens I would be okay as long as I have you by my side. That's why I want you to know exactly how I feel about you. I love you, as a man. Would you be able to accept my feelings and return them?"

That is it.

I poured out my feelings to him, honestly and truthfully.

Now everything is up to him.

I cannot tell if it was from nervousness or fear… perhaps from anticipation as well, but my heart was beginning to pound faster. I wonder what he will say... he would not think that I am disgusting or awful, would he?

That being said, I did not expect that he would go quiet on me.

Now I am worried for a completely different reason.

"Tenn-nii?" I called out to him, wondering if he was alright.

If anything, I did not expect him to laugh out loud.

"I'm sorry," He apologised after his giggles and chuckles had died down. "I was just thinking that it's funny."

"What is?"

"Everything, I suppose? We both felt the same way about things and of each other, yet we made lots of misunderstandings which caused us to drift apart and hurt each other unintentionally. In the end, everything was simple… how did it become so complicated, I wonder?"

"The same way…?" Does that mean that, towards me, he… "Tenn-nii, you too…?"

And when he smiled at me, so tenderly and lovingly, I knew his answer before he even put it in words.

"I love you too, Riku. Right from the bottom of my heart."

He loves me.

Tenn-nii says he loves me.

Not anyone else.

Me.

"Tenn-nii!"

"Woah!"

I could not contain the overwhelming feelings that burst forth and I leapt into his arms, the way I used to do whenever Tenn-nii did something that made me overjoyed. However, because I came on him so suddenly, he lost his balance and fell onto the bed, with me on top of him.

I ended up with my head on his chest, but it was so comfortable that I did not feel like getting up. Tenn-nii did not complain either, so I chose not to.

"Riku, that is one habit that you really need to cure." He sighed. "You're not a child anymore."

"But I'm so happy that I can't help it! Aren't you, Tenn-nii?"

"I am, of course. What makes you think that I won't be, you silly thing?" He patted my hair gently. "But it has been so long since we got to be together. I won't run away again, so we have plenty of time."

"Really? You'll always be my side?"

"Not all the time, of course, but I'll never leave you like I did that time."

"Can you promise me that?"

"I'll swear to you if I have to."

"You don't have to go to that extent. But, I'm glad. I'm really, really glad. You don't know how scared I had been when you left home without even saying goodbye..."

"I'm sorry. I should have tried to talk to someone... you, or dad and mom... about how I thought and felt back then. In the end, I made everyone worry and become anxious because I kept myself closed up."

"Was it hard for you? After you had left home and all that?"

"It was. There were few places that would take an Omega in, but even though it was hard to get by, I had been lucky. If I had not been accepted by Gaku's grandparents, I would not have the chance to meet Kujou-san. And if I did not meet Kujou-san. I would not be able to have the power and ability to protect Sorata."

"So your modelling job... that was because of Kujou?"

"Yes. He said it was a way for me to establish a proper career and learn to stand on my own feet. But being popular means more work and less time to spend with Sora, but I have been lucky to be able to get regular off-days thanks to my company president. Since I have been earning a lot more than what Sorata and I need, I have been slowly paying Kujou-san back for the money he had spent on us. Naturally, I have been paying him back for the other job."

"Other job...?"

"Oh, you don't have to know about that." He was avoiding my gaze, a sign that it was a topic that he did not want to touch on. "That was part of the deal I made with Kujou-san, of course. He would provide everything Sora needs to grow up, and I would slowly pay him back. I'm not sure how many years that will take since I never asked."

"I see... what about your long hair? Was that for your job as well?"

"It initially was, but at that time it had yet to grow this long. But when I was done with it, Sora complimented and said that he liked it, so I decided to leave it long. Before I knew it, it had reached this length."

I had not noticed this before, but Tenn-nii calls Sorata 'Sora' a lot, huh... that is really cute.

"Sorata really is an adorable child, isn't he?"

"Really, he is... even though he takes after me more in appearance, sometimes he behaves in ways that remind me of you when you were a child. Especially the way he smiles and cries; it's exactly like you."

"Really? Maybe that's why people think that he resembles me more."

"Perhaps so."

"But the way I see it, he'll come to take after you more in personality, too. Maybe not now, but when he grows bigger."

"We'll see when the time comes. He's so small and adorable now. I don't actually want to see him grow up."

I laughed at Tenn-nii's comment. "So... are we going to tell him?"

"Sorata?"

"Yeah."

"About which, us dating or you being his father?"

"Both. After seeing how he rejected the idea of Yaotome-san being his father so strongly, I'm kind of scared. He's so cute and adorable, I want to see him remain happy and cheerful. If possible, I'd like to avoid making him feel sad or hurt."

"That may have been my fault. I have always been too worried about how to react if he learnt the truth, so I consciously avoid the topic. When he asked me once why he doesn't have a father like his friends do, I probably made a terrible face. I did not realise that when he came to me later that evening, crying and saying that he won't say anything else about his father again as he doesn't want to see me sad."

"I see..."

"But I think he likes you enough, so he should be open to us spending more time together. He probably doesn't understand the idea of dating yet, so we can explain it to him in simple terms if you'd like."

"Sure. But, even though we are dating, what should we actually do from here on out?"

"You're asking me?"

"I mean, I haven't dated anyone before! You've gone on dates and such with Yaotome-san, right? That makes you the experienced one."

"I suppose you're right... well, to be honest, we just got back together. I think it'll feel weird if our relationship progressed too quickly, especially for you, so we can just start by spending more time with each other."

"Just us, or with Sorata?"

"Whichever you prefer. I'll be happy either way."

"Ehehe..." It was then a thought came to my mind, and it was a slightly embarrassing one. "Say, Tenn-nii, can I ask something weird?"

"If asking is all you are doing?"

"Don't tease me like that, Tenn-nii."

"It's an old habit; I apologise. Go ahead and ask."

"Can I kiss you?"

I could feel the burn of the blush that had risen on my face. When Tenn-nii heard my question, he too blushed, just a little.

"Yes, you may." His voice came out as a soft whisper, as he closed his eyes for me.

Somehow, I regretted asking, as it was more nerve-wracking than I had expected it to be. Especially when | got my head off his chest and brought my face close to his.

I was so nervous, I had to close my eyes when my face got really, really close to his.

Then I felt something soft touch my lips.

It was... a really nice feeling that I cannot put into words.

Tenn-nii only opened his eyes after I pulled away and got off him.

"Don't mind me saying this, but you suck."

"Well, sorry for being inexperienced!"

"Calm down, Riku. I didn't mean it in a bad way. It just means that you have more to learn. Shall I teach you, then, how to please a man with your body?"

"I-I'll pass for today!"

"I was teasing you. Well, I was half-joking, really. I was the one who suggested starting slow, so we won't go beyond that for now."

"Got it..."

"Well now. I think it's about time we head back down. Sorata's probably looking for us right about now."

"How can you tell?"

"Mother's instinct."

And as Tenn-nii had said, Sorata was looking for us. The moment we came back, he ran up to us, asking where we had been. Iori dragged me aside and told me off for disappearing without telling anyone, as Sorata had been very worried about us.

That matter aside, a lot seemed to have happened while we were gone.

Ryuu-san had fallen asleep on the floor and I did not dare question where his shirt had gone off to. Although, I had to admit that I felt a little jealous of his abs.

Mitsuki was outright drunk and was more high-strung than he usually was. He seemed to be harassing people, going in between Iori and Nagi. However, he was hugging Manami-chan lovingly now, and the always-cheerful girl seems to be quite unaware of the state her mother is in.

Nagi, who I have never seen drunk in my life, was unusually quiet as he let himself get harassed by Mitsuki.

The children were getting sleepy, so I helped Tenn-nii and Sougo-san get them ready for bed. Once they were washed up and tucked in, Ryuu-san woke up. Although he was sober, he still drank alcohol, so Sougo-san drove them home to be able to put Haruto-kun to bed on time.

Tenn-nii and I then returned to help Iori clean up the room and leftover food. Nagi offered to help as well, but he was tasked with taking care of Mitsuki who had passed out.

It was a lot to clean up, and by the time we were done, it was quite late. Not only that, it had started raining heavily. Iori offered to have Tenn-nii stay the night, in the Japanese room with the children. I thought he would have refused, but surprisingly, he agreed as he was off work the next day.

That night, I was able to wish him good night for the first time in years. the thought of being able to see him first thing in the morning made me so excited that I could not fall asleep quickly.

In the morning, there was a flurry of activity getting the children and lunches ready for school on time. Nagi and Mitsuki were still in bed, suffering bad hangovers. However, having Tenn-nii around was a great help, and we managed to get everything prepared on time.

However, just before we left, Tenn-nii pulled me aside where no one could see us. He gave me a kiss on the cheek, wishing me good morning.

I bade him farewell at the kindergarten, as he headed home after dropping the children are.

That day felt like the best I ever had in years. And I know that it was all because of Tenn-nii and that my wish had finally come true.

_"Chapter 19" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for complaining, but I need to let this out.
> 
> I believe I already said that I'm busy with my day job and other priorities in life, yet there were not one but **three comments asking for faster updates**. Daily updates aren't easy, and I believe I've been trying my best already. 
> 
> I know you are all enjoying this story and want to quickly read the next part, but I'm human too. Please don't take my daily updating as something that is for granted.
> 
> If I get another comment along the lines of "faster/please/hurry up and update", I won't post anymore until I finish writing the entire thing. By my estimation, there are around 15 parts or more left to go. 
> 
> I didn't want to go to this extent, but I have enough stress at work seeing how it's both the end and soon start of the fiscal year. At the very least, please respect that I need time to rest and sleep too.


	45. Chapter 20A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note that there is a major mistake for Chapter 19A. Nagi's birthday should have been on a Sunday, not Tuesday. It slipped my mind that this story is set in 2021 but for some reason, I remembered it as 2023. I'll make the change later on after I finished the main story.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

In the neighbourhood where the kindergarten was, the annual Tanabata festival was always held on the 7th of July. 

Usually, I would just smile as I watch the children talk about what they would eat or experience at the festival, which they would attend with their parents in the evening. Some of them have family members who are manning the stalls. For example, Iori and Manami-chan's family are one of the few who would man a stall whenever it was the festival season, selling candied apples and chocolate-coated bananas. 

I used to avoid festivals because they reminded me of the ones I attended with Tenn-nii in the past, which brought up the bad memory of what happened between us. However, it was also because of Tenn-nii now that I was finally able to look forward to attending tonight's festival. 

According to the plans we had made, Tenn-nii had brought Sorata home with him to change. I would wait for him at the train station, which was near the festival. 

Two and a half weeks had passed since we started dating, and I am still not used to thinking of him as a boyfriend, much less a lover. Then again, whenever we spent time together, Sorata was always with us so I was barely able to spend time alone with him. 

We only went on two dates so far: first was just lunch and a day at the park on a Sunday. The second was a day out window shopping in the city. Rather than dates, they felt like family outings, but I am sure that seeing Sorata smile and having fun was far more important to Tenn-nii than anything else. I felt the same way as well. 

Sorata still thinks of me as just his teacher, one who he likes very much. Because I wish that there was one day he could call me 'Papa' with just as much affection as he refers to Tenn-nii as his mother, I get a bit of a sour feeling sometimes when he calls me 'Sensei' with that bright smile. Perhaps it was out of guilt, as I feel like we are deceiving him, although that was not our intention. I am not sure if he realises the specific change in our relationship, but he seems to be happy just seeing us get along and being comfortable in each other's presence. 

In the end, we did not make a firm decision on when we should tell Sorata about me being his birth father. We know that it is a topic that we have to touch on eventually and that he has every right to know. 

But as Tenn-nii said, there was no need for us to rush. We are only at the beginning stages of our relationship, and to be honest, I still feel a bit shy holding his hand in public. And when I meant holding, I mean the kind where our fingers lace together. 

More than anything, I am happy with the way things are, and there is no need for that to change. 

While waiting for Tenn-nii and Sorata to arrive, I ducked into a nearby convenience store to get a snack. Tenn-nii said that Sorata has a small appetite, and would be full after eating all the festival goodies and decided that we would eat dinner later if we are still hungry. However, because I spent the day with the children, I was already a little peckish before leaving the kindergarten. A rice ball may not be able to fully satiate my hunger, but it would do for now. 

I settled down on a bench near the station, facing the exit Tenn-nii had specified. As I waited, I read a novel which I bought last month. The sky began to get darker as time went, and I noticed more and more people gathering. Many were dressed up for the festival, wearing yukata or jinbei. 

I have not worn either of them for a long time. Our grandmother once sent me and Tenn-nii a set of jinbei to wear at the festival. However, we were in elementary school then and quickly outdrew them, so my mother donated them to my cousins who were close in age. Other than that one time, I always went to festivals in my regular clothes, like I did today. 

"Riku-sensei!" I heard a voice call me and I looked up to see Sakuya-kun and his father, Ryuu-san. They were dressed in matching jinbei, which for a moment I thought was cute. 

"Good evening, Ryuu-san and Sakuya-kun!" 

"Good evening, Riku-kun. Why are you sitting here alone? Aren't you going to the festival as well?" 

"Ah, I'm waiting for someone before going." I knew that Ryuu-san and Tenn-nii were close but because we have not told anyone about our relationship, not even as brothers, I decided to avoid mentioning Tenn-nii's name. "Where's Sougo-san?" 

"Haru caught a cold, so Mom's looking after him." Sakuya explained to me before his father could. "Sensei, where's Sorata-kun? He told me that he's going to be going to the festival with you and his mom today!" 

He did?! 

"Really?" Ryuu looked surprised at that revelation. "Are you and Tenn close?" 

"I suppose you could say we are. Te... Kujou-san said they were getting ready before coming over, so they aren't here yet." 

"Aww..." 

"Sakuya, why don't we go buy something to eat first?" 

"I want curry yakisoba!" 

"Sure. We'll have to buy some back for your mother too. Well then, I'll see you later, Riku-kun." 

"Bye-bye, Sensei!" 

"See you later." I waved them goodbye. 

After they left, I checked the time on my smartphone. It was five minutes past the expected time. I wonder if something had happened. 

However, as I was contemplating on calling them, I heard some whispers around me. 

"Say, isn't that person there pretty?" 

"Really! And their child is so cute too!" 

"Are they a man or a woman, I wonder? That yukata really suits them! I'm so envious!" 

"But don't they look like that model..." 

"It can't be that person, right?" 

I could more or less guess who they were talking about, but I did not look up until I heard their voices call out to me. 

"Pancakes-sensei!" 

"Riku, sorry to keep you waiting." 

I was left speechless. 

Both of them came dressed in yukata and wearing geta. Tenn-nii's yukata was patterned with cherry blossoms, while Sorata's was strawberries. Tenn-nii also had his long hair up in a twisted-up side bun and adorned with a simple hair accessory, and was wearing his usual pair of glasses as his disguise. Around his wrist was a matching bag. Sorata did not have any of those, but he was still adorable nonetheless. 

"Riku? Is something the matter?" 

"Oh, no, it's nothing!" 

"Liar. You didn't think that I won't notice how hard you were staring, did you? Is seeing me in a yukata that surprising?" 

"Well, no, I mean, you just look so beautiful I just couldn't help it..." 

Tenn-nii chuckled. "You don't have to flatter me like that. Come, let's go to the festival. You must be hungry after a long day's work." 

"Sorata is hungry too!" 

"Right!" I stood up quickly, and we began to walk towards the venue. 

"What does Sensei like to eat at the festival?" 

"Hmmm... takoyaki, I guess!" 

"Sorata likes that too!" 

"What about Tenn-nii?" 

"There's an old man here who serves up yakisoba with different varieties. His stall is so popular that there are always long queues. There's a variant with the omelette that I love. I already asked Ryuu to help me buy a pack since he'll definitely queue for them. Sougo loves the red-hot togarashi sauce variety." 

"T-Togarashi?" That sounds awfully spicy on its own, without the 'red-hot' descriptor."Oh, speaking of which, Sakuya-kun said something about curry yakisoba..." 

"Eh? Sakuya-kun was here?" 

"Yeah. He's with his Papa today." 

"We'll meet up with them to get the omelette-soba later, so let's get other kinds of food first, shall we?" 

"Yay!" Sorata and I cheered together in unison, as an agreement. 

"Sorata wants Uncle Mii's apples!" 

"I want something cold, so shaved ice sounds nice! Citrus soda, too!" 

"Riku, you know you can't take too many cold foods, so make sure you eat in moderation, okay?" 

"You worry too much, Tenn-nii. Well, we could get one of each thing we want, so we can share. Tenn-nii, you like the grilled buttered potatoes, don't you? We could get that, and grilled squid, and maybe buttered corn, and taiyaki—" 

"Now now, we haven't got to the festival and you're drooling already." 

"But it's been ages since I went to a festival! And with you, too! Let's play lots of games while we're there, too! Sorata, is there any game you want to play?" 

"Shooting!" 

"Let's try that later, then! How about you, Tenn-nii?" 

"I'm fine with just watching the both of you." 

It only took a short walk before we reached the venue, and it was already filled with people when we arrived. 

"Well, then." Tenn-nii sighed, adjusting his arms to better balance Sorata's weight. "Let's all have fun this evening. Riku, Sorata, make sure you don't get separated from me." 

"Right!" 

"Aye!" 

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really touched by all the comments that came in after yesterday's rant. I feel bad not having the time to reply to your comments (past and recent) individually, but all of you really made my day. Just want to know how much I appreciate the concern and the time you all take to read and leave those comments. Thanks to all of you I'll keep doing my best!


	46. Chapter 20B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

"Thank you for the food!"

While we were wandering around the festivals and looking at the many stalls that had been set up, we bumped into Ryuu-san and Sakuya-kun. They had just bought the yakisoba and were queuing to buy the grilled squid. We then decided to eat together after buying the rest of the food. Tenn-nii and Ryuu-san decided between them who would buy what, and we set off to buy them.

There was a corner with many benches at the festival, so we decided to meet there.

I thought we would go to buy the food together, but Tenn-nii left me at the benches to save space for everyone. He left Sorata with me as well, instructing sternly not to let him out of my sight, as he may wander off and get lost. Sorata looked happy to be sitting on my lap, so I let him sit there. We played a game with our hands to pass the time. Ryuu-san appeared a little later, balancing packets of food in both hands and a plastic bag on each elbow. Tenn-nii too returned with more food, as well as drinks for everyone.

Sorata, however, seemed disappointed that neither of them bought candy apples.

"Mama, apple?"

"We'll get them later from your Uncle Mii's place, so make sure you don't eat too much in one go."

"Okay!"

We gave our thanks and ate.

Even if the portion of each food item was split into three, we did buy a lot. There were probably one of each savoury variety sold at the festival scattered across the bench we were sitting on.

I first tried the omelette-wrapped yakisoba that Tenn-nii had told me about, and it was the best I ever had. No wonder it was so popular. Even the other things… the squid, fried chicken, crepes… they were all so delicious.

"Dad, I gotta pee!" Sakuya announced after we took our first few bites.

Ryuu-san had asked us if we could look after his belongings, and we agreed to.

After they had left, I noticed that Sorata was staring at the boat of takoyaki that was resting on my lap.

"Do you want to try?" I offered him, and he nodded eagerly in reply.

"Please!"

"Just give me a moment…" I poked through one ball with the skewer and blew on it to cool it down before offering it to him. "Be careful when you bite down, it's hot inside."

He took a big bite of it, and from the way he flinched, I could tell that he did not heed my warming.

"Hot, hot!"

However, it seemed that he did not burn himself, and slowly chewed the bite before swallowing it. He finished the entire ball in two more bites and licked the sauce off his lips. "Yummy!"

"I'm glad you liked it."

He then poked another and held it out to me. "Sensei, have one too!"

"Sure." I accepted his offer, bending down to take the entire ball into my mouth.

Indeed, I could feel that was still rather hot on the inside when I bit down, and by eating it whole, the heat had nowhere to escape but to the inside of my mouth. "Hot, hot!"

I heard Tenn-nii laugh. "The two of you really are alike. How cute."

"But it really is hot!" I protested while chewing on it.

"Mama, have one too!" Sorata offered one to him, along with one of his big smiles.

"I'll gladly accept it, then."

With Sorata still holding the skewer, Tenn-nii had no choice but to do what I did: bend over and eat the ball whole.

"Mama, how is it?"

Unlike me, Tenn-nii only replied after he chewed and swallowed.

"It really is piping hot. But it's so delicious. Thank you, Sorata."

"Ehehe!"

"Did you see that?" I could hear a female voice gossiping from a small distance away. "That family's so cute!"

"I know, right? The mom's so pretty and the dad looks so young… don't you think the boy looks just like his father?"

"Eh, a boy? He was so adorable I thought he was a girl!"

"They're talking about us, aren't they?" Tenn-nii whispered to me. It seems that he had also noticed they were talking about us as well. "You're showing it on your face."

"Am I?"

"You are. Wipe that silly grin off your face before someone sees it."

"We're back!" At that time, Sakuya-kun and Ryuu-san returned.

"Did something happen?" Ryuu-san asked, noticing how close we were.

We were just talking about what we should do after we eat." Tenn-nii replied him, but I did not think that he would put his hand over mine in front of him.

"I see..." Because Tenn-nii had made his actions so obvious, there was no way Ryuu-san would not have noticed. "I was thinking of bringing Sakuya around for a bit more before we go home, so why don't I bring Sorata-kun around as well? I'm sure they will both be delighted with that arrangement."

Eh? Does that mean... that Tenn-nii and I would be left alone?

"I'll take up on your offer, then. I'll pass you a little cash for his candy apple and games. I doubt he can finish the entire apple after dinner, so you may want to get that after he's done playing."

Eh?!

Tenn-nii, what are you thinking?!

"Sure, got it."

After we were done eating, we sent Sorata off. He waved back to us before leaving with Sakuya-kun, the two walking hand-in-hand.

Just like how Tenn-nii and I were doing now.

Well, we were not exactly holding hands. In fact, we were linking arms, the way couples do.

Oh, wait.

We are a couple.

"Riku, why don't we get that shaved ice you wanted first? You still have plenty of room in your stomach, don't you? We could get one each, my treat."

"I do, but it's fine. I can pay for my own portion. I mean, you already paid for dinner, didn't you?"

"Take it as my thanks for picking up the tab that time."

"That time? Ahh..." The incident when Sorata threw a tantrum at the family restaurant. "I guess I'll take up on your offer!"

"So what would you like?"

"Strawberry! What about you, Tenn-nii?"

"Hmmm... Blue Hawaii, I suppose."

We got our cups of shaved ice and began to walk around the festival. However, because it was too crowded to move around freely, we decided to go to a quieter place to finish them.

There was no one around, surprisingly, so we had the place all to ourselves.

"Tenn-nii, can I have a bite of yours?"

"Sure. Here you go."

He took a spoonful and offered it to me. I ate it happily, savouring the cold sweetness on my tongue.

"What about me, Riku?"

"Eh?"

"Aren't you going to offer me a bite?"

"Oh! Here!" I did what he did for me, and he ate it.

Although, for some reason, the way he took the spoon in his mouth was rather... erotic.

"Riku? is something wrong? Your face had gone red all of a sudden."

"N-No, nothing is wrong!"

"Are you sure? Well, perhaps you were just drunk on the mood of the festival. You did have the tendency of getting carried away whenever you get excited. You "

"You could say it's that." I could only smile awkwardly, as I did not know how to salvage the situation.

"Ah, you got syrup on your face. Let me wipe that off for you."

As he was searching for his handkerchief, a chill suddenly ran down my spine. What was with this feeling... I did not like it one bit. It was a sense of foreboding, and it was steadily getting stronger.

Tenn-nii did not seem to notice it at all, so it would be odd for me to bring it up.

But why am I not able to shake off this fear that something… no, someone was approaching?

In the first place, why was I so scared?

There should be a reason, but I do not know what it is yet.

At that moment, as I had been worrying about the strange sensation, I felt a familiar softness on my lips. I did not know when or why, but Tenn-nii was kissing me!

"T-T-Tenn-nii?"

"Why are you spacing out for, you dummy? What could be so important that it distracted you? Or, could it be that you didn't want to spend time like this, just the two of us without Sora around?"

Tenn-nii was pouting… it was rare for him to, and it made him seem so adorable.

"You got it wrong, Tenn-nii! It's not like I dislike or didn't want us spending time like this together… In fact, it makes me very happy to be able to be with you. It's just that I thought of something… I didn't expect you to kiss me, though..."

"Why?"

"We haven't kissed each other since the day we made up. I always wanted to, again but didn't really have the courage to ask. Plus, we shouldn't be doing that kind of thing in front of Sorata."

"You're right about that."

"But since it's just the two of us here… is it okay if we kissed again?"

"Of course… it's okay…"

I put down the paper cup next to where I was sitting, so as to free my hands. Tenn-nii put his down, too, so he could wrap his arms around my neck. I was still unfamiliar with what to do, so I let him take the lead.

However, Tenn-nii pulled away almost too quickly just as our lips were about to touch. When I saw the reason why I knew that it was the cause of that instinctive fear that had struck me hard earlier.

"Kujou-san…"

The middle-aged man standing a distance away from us was merely frowning, yet the prickly air around him was a clear indication of his anger.

That is the man who took Tenn-nii in… Kujou Takamasa…

"Tenn… as well as Nanase Riku." His voice was low, his fury reflected in the way he intonated each syllable. "If you don't mind, I would like to talk with the both of you."

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't had good takoyaki locally since Gindaco closed all its outlets here. I had it thrice within the week I was there last year. I'm tempted to find a job in Japan so I can eat it as and when I want, but I'll see.


	47. Chapter 20C

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was supposed to put up Misumi-san's (Aunt Mimi's) profile up earlier in chapter 20A but I forgot so I'll pop it in the endnotes here.
> 
>  
> 
> **Written in Riku's POV**

"Tenn, I'm disappointed in you." The man began as he stood in front of us. The both of us were now standing as well, as a gesture of respect. "I didn't think that less than a month after breaking off your engagement, I would find you fooling around with another man in public. Not to mention, with your younger twin brother… the father of your precious son. Do you not know shame and disgrace?"

"How do you know about me?" I took a step forward and stood in front of Tenn-nii to protect him.

"In my line of work, information and connections are far more valuable than anything else of monetary value. Finding your personal details and history, as I had done while I was looking up Tenn's, is child's play."

"Kujou-san, listen," Tenn-nii was speaking very carefully, which was unusual. Just what kind of person is he? "I can explain."

"Explain, what? I believe what I have just seen had provided more of an explanation than words ever could. Indeed, Yaotome-kun's son may have been the one to take action and break off the engagement. But do you think that means that the responsibility should be shouldered by him alone?"

"You're not wrong about that… I believe that part of it lies with me as well."

Tenn-nii, what are you saying?

"Tenn-nii, you're—"

"I'm sorry, Riku. Please keep silent for now."

"I understand..."

"Kujou-san, please allow me to speak frankly. I understand how much you care and look out for Sorata, even though neither he nor I am related to you by blood. As you have said, you have every right to care for his well-being and development, as much as I do. I, too, want Sorata to be able to have a father in his life one day. However, I would not want to force him to accept or be put up with someone "

"What are you trying to imply?"

"I want Sorata to be able to choose who he sees and wants as his parent. I want him to have a say in this decision as well."

"He is just a child. As adults, we have to make the right decision for him."

"It is because he is a child that I want him to make the decision as well. While my choice of partner may not necessarily concern him, it is actually a matter that will affect him and his future. I don't want him holding any feelings of remorse or regret when he grows up. "

"So you are saying that Sorata chose him?"

"Not just Sorata. I chose him as well, and will continue to do so even if I was given millions of other men to choose from."

"That is what you have decided?"

"Yes."

"You're a fool. Have you forgotten what this man had done to you, all those years back?"

"Of course, I haven't."

"No matter what is the circumstance, he raped you. That child is proof of that. In addition, the both of you are siblings related by blood. How do you think people will see Sorata, and think of him? How do you think Sorata will feel and think when he learns about the circumstances of his birth? Even if you can forgive this man, it does not mean that his sins will disappear. Even if you are happy by choosing him in the present, it does not mean that you will not face hardship for the rest of your life. Despite knowing all that, you still wish to choose him?"

I hate to admit it, but everything he said was right.

Even though he is a child who is loved, Sorata was a child born of both incest and rape… two things that are already each viewed as heavy taboos in society. Even though Yaotome-san said that it is not good to bother about what others think and say, only a few think the same way as him.

No matter how strong-willed he may become, there would only be so much that he could take…

"And Tenn, you may not show it normally, but you still bear the scars of what happened that incident, don't you?"

"Eh?" I turned to look at Tenn-nii, who was avoided my gaze.

"During your heats, you are always alone in the apartment and keep yourself locked in your bedroom. You get constantly anxious as to when the next one will come and are much too fastidious when it comes to monitoring it. Not only that, you purposely go out of your way to have the house vacant by having someone take him in for a few days. Even if you aren't able to care for Sorata half a day, you could have simply had the housekeeper watch over him between waves of your heat or even stay over. Why go through so much trouble, just to be alone?"

From what I know about heats, what he said made sense.

In fact, most Omegas actually crave the company of people, either bonded partners or people they are close to, both during and before their heats. It was rare to hear of an Omega choosing to isolate themselves, but there is usually one common exception.

That is if the Omega had gone through a sexually-related traumatic experience.

Especially, rape…

"Tenn-nii… don't tell me…"

"It is exactly as you had thought, young man." Kujou was the one who replied to me instead of Tenn-nii. "To this very day, Tenn has yet to fully recover from what you did to him six years ago. If you thought that him being able to be discharged from hospital meant that he had completely healed, you are wrong. Scars on the body heal easily. Those on the mind do not. Indeed, he had improved by leaps and bounds compared to the time when he was just hospitalised and would not allow anyone near him. Not even his own parents."

Tenn-nii had been like that?

I really was not told anything at all, huh?

How frustrating…

"Did you hear all of that from Misumi-san?"

"Of course. Why did you think I hired her as our housekeeper, to look after Sorata? A mere coincidence it may be that she was the mother of my secretary and that she happened to be searching for a housekeeping position, but it was because I was aware that she had connections to you that I allowed her to care for the child."

"Is that so…"

"Kujou-san," I interrupted, wanting to bring the topic back on track. Also, I wanted for him to listen to my opinion on the matter. "I'm aware that everything you said is true. Choosing to be happy doesn't mean that we'll be free of hardships. However! I feel that it is because we are together, we would be able to overcome anything. For me, I know that if I have Tenn-nii by my side, I don't have anything to fear. And I'm sure that it's the same for Tenn-nii, too."

"I don't hate your optimism, young man, but I'm afraid that it is insufficient in convincing me."

"How can I convince you, then?"

"No, Riku, don't challenge him…" Tenn-nii held my arm, squeezing it lightly.

"Don't stop me, Tenn-nii. Nothing can be harder and more difficult than what you had to go through alone."

"Tenn, are you sure that he is the one you want to live the rest of your life with?"

"Yes. I have decided a long time ago that Riku is the only one for me."

"And you, Nanase Riku. Would you be able to swear that you would protect and care for them, Tenn and Sorata, no matter what the circumstance? To ensure that they will be, and feel, happy and loved? And, as Tenn's mate, stay devoted to him and only him, for as long as you both shall live?"

"I would, and I will. I'll do anything for them."

"Anything, you say?"

"Anything and everything."

"Then I shall take your word for it. I only have one condition for you, if you want me to acknowledge and accept your relationship."

"And that is?"

"For Sorata to accept you as his birth father. You would have to tell him that you were his parent, who had been missing from his life even before he was born. And after he learns that, he will have to accept you from the bottom of his heart. There will be no such thing as compromise, or agreements. Only acceptance. If the child is willing to forgive you and see you as his father, then I neither have the right nor am in the position to say anything about your relationship."

I had nothing to say about his condition.

Not only was it a perfectly reasonable request, I could tell that he genuinely cares for Sorata. If I were in his position, I am not sure if I could confidently make the same choice.

However, I was definitely scared. I do not know how Sorata would take the news. On one hand, since he already likes me enough, he may easily accept it. On the other, he may not. It made me uncertain, and quite worried. But that does not mean that I would back down without doing anything.

"What do you say, Nanase Riku? Would you accept my condition?"

"Of course, I will."

"Good. I suggest that you should tell him as soon as possible, seeing how you have made your resolve. It would not do you good if you sat on the matter."

"I know."

"Well then, I have a flight to catch, so I will be seeing you. I will check up on you again the next time I return to Japan."

He left right after that, and soon there was just the two of us left.

Tenn-nii had been so tense that he had to relieve the tension with a loud sigh. "So? What shall we do now?"

"He's right. We have to tell Sorata about us. It may actually be worse if we drag it out... just like how we made each other and everyone else suffers when we chose not to face the matter in the present."

"But, now?"

"Of course not today. But, soon." I took his hand, holding it tightly. "We're bringing him out this Sunday, aren't we? Let's tell him then."

"Alright."

"Are you scared?"

"I am, but for a different reason as before. I used to fear being left alone more than anything else. I was so afraid that if he learns the truth, he would come to hate me. That he would choose to leave me. That's why I could not bear to tell him."

"But you're not alone anymore. You got me, too, Tenn-nii. I'll always be with you, no matter what happens."

"Thank you, Riku. That is very reassuring."

"All we can do now is to believe in Sorata. He is our child, after all. I'm sure everything will be alright."

I am sure of it.

"By the way, Riku, Kujou-san mentioned something about mates... but aren't you a Beta?"

"Oh, about that, I'm actually an Alpha."

"What?! This is the first time I'm hearing of this."

"Yeah... I forgot to tell you?"

"You did! You'll be telling me all about that later on in detail, you hear me?"

"Y-Yes!"

_"Chapter 20" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Character Profile: Aunt Mimi**
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Name: Misumi Keiko (三澄 敬子)  
> Age: 56  
> Birthdate: 29 December 1966 (assuming that Tenn was born on 9th July 1997 and that the Idolish7 timeline is in 2015)  
> Eye colour: Brown  
> Hair colour: Black  
> Height: 160 cm  
> Weight: about 58kg
> 
> Notes:
> 
>   * The Kujou family's housekeeper and Sorata's babysitter, hired by Kujou Takamasa to clean the house and care for Sorata about a year after Tenn started working as a model. 
>   * Is an Omega, but no longer has heats as she is past the age. 
>   * She first met her husband when she was in high school. He was her homeroom teacher and older than her by twelve years. Her marriage was arranged by her family, but her feelings for her husband were genuine. 
>   * Has two sons and a daughter, all two years apart. Her two sons are married. The eldest has three children while the second is working overseas with no intention to have children. 
>   * Used to work at a nurse at the hospital near Tenn and Riku's neighbourhood, where she used to live until her husband passed away. She moved to live with her eldest son after his passing. She initially spent time looking after her grandchildren, but because they are of schooling age she decided to find a job to work in the day. 
>   * Her eldest son, Masayuki, had been working as Kujou Takamasa's secretary for a long time. The poor man is often travelling and is worried that his children will forget his face. However, when Sorata came along, Kujou had begun to allow him to take week-long vacations off work to spend time with his family. His wife works as a nurse in a local elementary school. 
>   * Is an excellent cook and proficient in housework. Her best dishes feature tomatoes, which are also her favourite. 
>   * She likes taking long walks and often takes Sorata with her on them when Tenn is working. 
>   * Sorata calls her "Aunt Mimi" as he was initially unable to pronounce her name, but the nickname stuck. Rather than his caregiver, he sees her as a grandmother figure. 
>   * She treats Tenn like her own child at times, which makes him embarrassed. 
> 



	48. Chapter 21A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

* * *

Two days have passed since our run-in with Kujou. Today was Friday, and also the 9th of July… our 24th birthday.

To celebrate, I had taken... or rather, was forced to the day off work, and by coincidence, Tenn-nii had no work either so that we decided Sorata out on an outing.

We were initially debated on where we should bring him to, and what to do. Fortunately, that problem was quickly solved as I received passes to an aquarium from Iori and his brother's family. Despite having not told anyone of our relationship yet, they gave us three passes, just enough for me, Tenn-nii and Sorata.

Before heading to the aquarium, we decided to have brunch first. Sorata, as always, wanted pancakes. We managed to find a cafe famous for its pancakes at a nearby mall and decided on it immediately.

In the morning, we met at the train station nearest to the kindergarten.

I spent some time deciding what to wear. Beige Bermuda pants and a dark blue mid-sleeved collared shirt left unbuttoned, with a grey and white striped T-shirt underneath. To top it off, I wore the pair of off-white slip-ons I bought last summer. The weather was getting hotter, so I did not want to dress too heavily.

The sky was clear and blue when I left my apartment, so I took a long walk to the station. When I arrived, Tenn-nii and Sorata were already waiting for me.

"Pancakes-sensei!" Sorata hugged my legs when I approached. "Good morning!"

"Good morning, Sorata and Tenn-nii!"

"Good morning, Riku."

"Mr Cat is here, too!" Sorata held up the stuffed cat that I recall him bringing out with him often. He moved its paw in a manner that made it seem like it was waving at me.

"Hello Mr Cat!"

"Ah! Sensei, look! We match!"

Sorata stepped back to show me what he wore. He was wearing a short-sleeved white and grey striped T-shirt and ankle-length light brown pants that looked close enough to beige, along with his usual red sneakers.

"Really, we do!"

"Mama picked it out for Sorata since Sorata helped to pick out Mama's clothes! Because today is a very special day! What does Sensei think?"

Tenn-nii was wearing a loose, wide-necked navy top with sleeves that reached slightly past his elbows. This was paired with a pair of cream-coloured linen pants and black socks. His shoes, surprisingly, were similar to mine in both colour and model. These were topped off with a pair of gold round-framed glasses and a dark grey hat.

"Well, to be exact, he only chose the top." Tenn-nii smiled at me. "If you look closely, we match too, don't you think?"

"Now that you mention it, we do."

"Sensei, Mama, let's go! Pancakes! Fish! Penguins!"

"Yes, dear, we're coming." Tenn-nii bent down for his hand, which he happily took. "Come, Riku, let's go."

"Coming!"

When we boarded the train, there were plenty of seats so we sat down together. Sorata sat on my left, and Tenn-nii was on his other side. He was beaming with joy.

"Say, Sensei, do you know what day it is today?"

I knew the answer, of course, but I decided not to tell him that I did. "Hmm, I don't know... Do you want me to guess?"

"Guess!"

"Mmm... Blueberry day?"

"No!"

"Pancakes day?"

"Mmmm... Mama said Sorata could have lots of pancakes today, but no!"

"Hmm... I don't know. Could you tell me what day it is today?"

"Today is Mama's birthday!"

"Really?"

I hoped my surprise seemed genuine.

In fact, I already called Tenn-nii early this morning, when Sorata was still asleep. We wished each other good morning as we do over the phone every morning, as well as happy birthday.

"Sorata, could you tell me when your birthday is?"

"March! Like Uncle Mii! When is Sensei's birthday?"

"Ufufu, you'll be surprised, Sorata. In fact, Sensei's birthday is also today!"

"Oh!" The look of surprise on his face was so adorable I felt my heart skip a beat. "Happy birthday, Sensei! Sorata doesn't have a present for Sensei, so Sorata will give Sensei a big, big birthday hug!"

"Thank you, Sorata!"

Why is he so adorable, this child!

"What about me, Sorata?" Watching how chummy we were getting, Tenn-nii pouted. However, I only knew that he was pretending to be jealous. "Doesn't Mama get a big birthday hug too?"

"Sorata will give Mama one!" He chuckled, turning to the other side to give Tenn-nii a hug as well.

When we reached the station where he had to change trains, I could not help but notice that it was unusually crowded. That was also when I saw Tenn-nii carry Sorata, the way he did at the festival.

Sorata may be smaller and lighter than most children in his cohort, but that was probably unrelated to why Tenn-nii does that. I was curious, so I asked him about it.

"There have been many instances where Sorata gets lost or wanders off in huge crowds and approached by unpleasant people if I let him walk next to me. He can even slip away if I tell him to hold my hand. It was even in a crowd that he got kidnapped once."

"Oh no." I felt a slight anger burning in me. "How can people even think of doing such a terrible thing?"

"If I had to summarise it, I would say it was a case of humans being driven to extreme means because they were too desperate. Thanks to Kujou-san's intervention, he was completely unharmed and returned to me in less than two hours, but I believe you can imagine how scared and worried I was then."

"What did Kujou do?"

"According to him, he just made a call to a very… close and important friend, who quickly took action. They found him and the kidnapper within less than ten minutes and mobilised the JSDF to retrieve him."

"T-The JSDF?!"

What kind of power does that man have that the government's defence force was roped in to assist in a single case of child kidnapping?!

"If you had seen the kind of connections Kujou-san has, you'd definitely not want to make an enemy of him."

"A-Ahh…" Which explains why Tenn-nii warned me not to challenge him during the festival, huh…

Oh, speaking of the festival.

That evening, after Kujou had left, we decided to pick up Sorata and bring him home. He, along with Sakuya-kun and Ryuu-san, was still at the shooting booth when we came. At that time, Sorata was playing his fifth round and had already won four prizes prior to that, and all of them were snacks.

Because of that, a crowd had gathered around the booth to watch him in awe. The only people unaffected were Tenn-nii, Sakuya-kun, Ryuu-san and the middle-aged man standing in the booth... the shopkeeper.

Apparently, this occurance—Sorata's good aim I mean—was common. The only reason why he had yet to be banned from the booth was that he was so adorable, according to Tenn-nii, although he suspects that the shopkeeper intended to use him to advertise the booth.

I could understand why. Most adults would think that if it was something a child could do, an adult would be able to accomplish the same. However, because he is a child, they underestimate his abilities and end up having a false conclusion that the game was easy. In reality, it was only because Sorata was far too good.

Despite that, we still felt sorry for the shopkeeper who lost five boxes of snacks to one child so we tempted him with the promise of candy apples in order to get him to leave the booth.

To be honest, what Kujou said still worries me. Especially his reason behind his condition. It may be a misinterpretation on my part, but he seemed rather confident that it would be difficult for Sorata to accept me. Naturally, it was not easy, for me to tell him and for him to accept the news so suddenly. However, I have a nagging feeling that something unexpected may happen, so I tried to brush it aside.

Back to today, we were still very early ahead of our schedule when we reached our destination. Fortunately, the cafe had just opened, so we managed to get a seat without having to wait long.

All three of us ordered pancakes, with the intention to share amongst ourselves.

Tenn-nii went for a savoury option: a stack of plain pancakes accompanied with smoked salmon and sour cream, as well as a small salad on the side. I also had a savoury option, which came with shrimp and drenched with a garlic butter sauce. Only Sorata went for a sweet one, which had bananas and salted caramel.

We had to wait for a little for our orders, so we spent the time waiting for our food talking about what we wanted to see at the aquarium.

Sorata was particularly interested in the animal show, which featured penguins, seals and dolphins, just as I had been as a child.

Apparently, Sorata had been to the same aquarium once before, but that was with Sougo-san and Sakuya-kun last year. However, because it was his first time with Tenn-nii—his beloved Mama, he was very excited and had some trouble falling asleep the night before.

We headed to the aquarium immediately after finishing our pancakes. Despite it being a weekday, it was quite crowded. There were quite a few couples and a lot more tourists, but not as many families with young children.

This time, I carried Sorata, as it had always been Tenn-nii carrying him. He seemed happy with the change, as he snuggled his head into my shoulder with a little giggle of glee after I lifted him up and into my arms.

"What shall we go to see first?" Tenn-nii held the pamphlet in one hand, looking through the list of attractions. In the other was Sorata's favourite stuffed cat. "There's still about an hour before the next animal show, so we can still look through one or two zones before going to get seats."

"Jellyfish!" Sorata announced, knowing that we have left the decision to him.

"The jellyfish are just over there." After keeping the guide in his tote bag, Tenn-nii linked his arm with mine, the one that was not used to support Sorata's weight. "Let's go, then."

Fortunately for me, it was quite dark. I hoped the light blush that I could feel rising on my face was not too obvious.

"O-Oh."

**\- to be continued -**


	49. Chapter 21B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

"The aquarium was fun, wasn't it?"

"Yes!" Sorata chirped, hugging his plush toy close to his chest. "It was!"

After the animal show, the aquarium became surprisingly empty. There were only a few visitors around aside from ourselves. Because of that, we were able to take our time going around the various zones, looking at the animals and the marine fauna, and just finished. However, it seemed like it was not enough for Sorata, who seemed eager to go another round.

"Can Sorata go take a look around again?"

"Sure, we have time," Tenn-nii replied. "What do you want to see?"

"Penguins!"

"Let's go, then."

Near where the penguins and seals were, there were a few benches for the visitors to sit and rest. Since there was no one but us, we let Sorata go around on his own while we sat down. Of course, we did not let him out of our sight.

"I'm glad he's enjoying himself." I sighed happily as I watched him stand in front of the glass, watching the penguins swim. "But I'm surprised that he still has so much energy."

"Aren't you used to being around children?"

"Well, other people's children is one thing, but somehow your own feels completely different. Sorata is special and important to me." I squeezed his hand, which my own was holding. "Thank you for choosing to give birth to him, Tenn-nii."

"You make it sound like you wouldn't have done the same."

"Would you hate me if I said that you're right?"

"No... I can't say that I would. Aborting the children may have been the logical choice then, considering our circumstances. Even I knew that. Kujou-san did say that Sorata is the proof of what happened between us, and I'm sure many people out there would see him that way. But I just could not shake off the instinct that he needed to be protected and loved."

"Would it be rude if I asked why?"

"Not at all. But, I don't really know why myself. It was not so much because he was our child, if I had to guess, but rather because he was innocent. The ones who had sinned were us. Even if his birth was a result of a grave sin, he himself is still untainted and pure. And if possible, I would have liked to keep things that way for the rest of his life."

"Tenn-nii... we would still have to tell him one day."

"I know. Kujou-san's condition did not say that we have to tell him about the circumstances of his birth. Even if we did, I'm afraid that he'll misunderstand. I don't want him to think that he was unwanted and unloved."

"He won't think that way! He's your son, after all, Tenn-nii. I'm sure he'll understand, especially after how much love you have given him."

"I hope so."

"Let's talk to him about what we wanted to today, first, okay?"

"I know." He said that with a smile, but I could tell that he was still worried.

"Mama! Pancakes-sensei!" Sorata came running back to us. "Sorata's thirsty! Water, please!"

Sorata had left his backpack with us earlier, so Tenn-nii retrieved the bottle from it and gave it to him. Sorata accepted it with thanks, popping it open by pressing the button and drinking from the straw attached to the top.

Would now be a good time to tell him?

I glanced towards Tenn-nii, who caught it. He too was asking me the same thing.

Sorata closed the cap of the bottle and handed it back to Tenn-nii. "Thank you, Mama!"

"It's my pleasure, sweetheart."

"Can Sorata sit down?"

"Of course." We both made space for him to sit between us, and he hopped onto the bench.

Since this morning, he had been smiling non-stop, but his wide smile was still as radiant as ever. "You know, Mama, Sensei… Sorata likes Mama and Sensei lots and lots!"

"Mama loves you too, my dear Sora." Tenn-nii bent down to place a kiss on his cheek. "And Mama likes Sensei, too."

"Really? Lots and lots? Just like Sorata does?"

"It's a different kind of like from Sorata's… you know, the adult kind of like, but yes. Mama likes Sensei a lot, too."

I took that as my cue to enter the conversation ."S-Sensei likes Sorata too! Of course, and Sorata's Mama as well."

"Lots?"

"Lots and more. Towards the both of you."

Sorata let out a happy chuckle. "Sorata likes being with Mama and Sensei the most! Sorata thinks that it will be really nice if Sorata, Mama and Sensei can stay together forever, and eats lots and lots of pancakes!"

"Sora…"

"Sorata…"

At that time, we both realised the same thing.

If we told him the truth… that I was his father, we would be robbing him of that happy and innocent smile.

But we cannot avoid telling him. It may hurt us, but we need to overcome it in order to truly attain the happiness we desire. This was not a selfish opinion, but our reality.

"Sorata, you said before that you wanted me to become your father… right?"

"Yes! Sorata likes Sensei lots, so Sorata would be very, very happy if Sensei becomes Sorata's Papa!"

My heart was gripped tightly with nervousness and guilt. But, I need to tell him. "Sorata… the truth is, Sensei is your father."

Well, that did not come out the way I wanted it to.

Upon hearing what I said, Sorata froze. His smile faded, leaving only pure shock on his face.

"… Eh…?"

"I'm sorry that I'm only telling you this now, Sorata, but I'm your father. You are the child between me and your Mama."

"No," He shook his head slowly. "Sensei is lying. Pancakes-sensei is so kind and gentle… and he likes Mama and Sorata lots… and he's a very good person. There's no way that Sensei can be Sorata's Papa… after all, Sorata's Papa is a very bad man…"

My heart sank.

I did not think that seeing him look this hurt would be so… mortifying.

"Mama, it's not true, right? Sensei… can't be Papa, right?"

"Sora, it's the truth." Tenn-nii forced himself to smile, but I knew that he had been affected by Sorata's reaction. "Your beloved Pancakes-sensei is your real Papa."

"Mama knew, all along?"

"Yes… I did."

"Mama knew and never told Sorata?"

"I'm sorry, Sora. But, I thought—"

Tenn-nii had reached out his hand to pat our son's head as he spoke, but Sorata pushed his hand away as he stood up, moving a little away from us.

"S-Sora, listen…"

"Sorata doesn't want to!" He began to cry as he yelled. "Mama lied to Sorata! Just like Sensei! If Sensei is really Sorata's Papa, that means that he's not a good person at all! He also lied to Sorata! Sorata doesn't like that!"

I, too, stood up to take a step forward. But that only made him retreat a few steps back. Approaching would only make him run away, so I tried to convince him.

"Sorata, I'm sorry for not telling you earlier as well. It's not your Mama's fault at all, so don't blame him. Listen, I—"

"NO!" He shouted, in the same manner of the time he did at the family restaurant.

In fact, this was quite similar to what happened that day. But this time, I could tell that the reason for Sorata's rejection was completely different.

"Sorata…"

"GO AWAY!" He threw his stuffed cat at me, probably with the intention to stop me from trying to come close or talk to him.

"Sorata, that's enough!" Tenn-nii looked like he was about to lose his patience.

I quickly grabbed his wrist to stop him, knowing that what he had intended to do would only make things worse.

"MAMA IS A LIAR! MAMA AND SENSEI TRICKED SORATA AND TOLD NASTY, HORRIBLE LIES! MAMA WAS BAD, JUST LIKE PAPA! SORATA HATES BAD PEOPLE LIKE HIS PAPA! MAMA DID BAD THINGS AND BECAME A BAD PERSON, SO SORATA HATES MAMA TOO! SORATA DOESN'T NEED MAMA ANYMORE!"

Unfortunately, I was too late.

That outburst was the final blow. Hearing Sorata's words, Tenn-nii lost all strength in his body and fell to his knees. I tried to help him up and noticed that he began to cry as he buried his face in his hands. "Sora…"

"Sorata!" I yelled at him sharply, despite knowing that raising my voice was not the better option. "You've said too much! Apologise to your mother! Now!"

However, that did not make him realise what he had done but only seemed to make him angrier instead.

Instead of apologising like I had asked him to, he ran away. To where, I am not sure, as I was unable to give chase. Not when Tenn-nii had broken down completely.

"Sora… Sora, I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. Please, don't hate me. I love you so, so much. Don't leave me alone, I beg you. You're all I have. I don't want to be alone again…"

"Tenn-nii!"

"It's over, Riku. That child… our child has finally given up on me. I already know that it was a matter of time. Everything he said… I know I deserve to go through all of that, since I'm a failure as a parent, but I didn't think… What should I do? Sora finally says that he hates me… That he doesn't need a useless parent like me anymore. Without him, I just can't keep going anymore… Sora… Sorata…"

Tenn-nii… had he ever been this weak?

"Snap out of it, Tenn-nii! Please, get a grip on yourself! You're not alone! You have me now, don't you?"

"Riku…" He finally looked up at me. His face was stained with tears, eyes beginning to turn red from crying.

"Tenn-nii, calm down. This isn't like you at all." I hugged him to comfort him. "You're not a failure at all. You've raised Sorata so well, all by yourself. You gave him so much love... there's no way that he won't realise that."

"But... he says he doesn't need me anymore."

"I'm sure that he was just upset and didn't mean what he said. There's no way that he won't need or want you. Ever since he was born, you were the only one he ever had as his parent. You have always been by his side, haven't you?"

"Even so..."

"Have some confidence, Tenn-nii. You always put him before yourself and did everything you could for him, didn't you?" He nodded slowly in reply. "Put your trust in him, and me as well. It's my turn to be able to do something for the both of you."

"What do you intend to do?"

"I'll go find him and bring him back. I have yet to do anything for him as his father... and even if he denies it, he is still my son. Right now, I don't care if he accepts me or not. I want him to make peace with you. That is more important than anything else right now."

"But if he doesn't accept you, we'll—"

"We'll be alright! We did say that he may need some time, right? Sorata's a sensible child, just like how you had been when you were young, so I'm sure he will listen once he gets over the shock." I let Tenn-nii sit back down on the bench and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. "Do you want to stay here, or look for Sorata as well?"

"I'll... I'll stay. I have no right to face that child now."

"Got it. Do you think you'll be okay by yourself?"

"Yes, I would."

"I will be back with Sorata. I promise."

"I trust you will."

I left Tenn-nii behind and went to look for Sorata.

Despite that, the aquarium was huge, and although he was just a child he could have gone anywhere now.

If anything, I know that he is still in the aquarium. If a small child like him were to try to run out of here alone, he would have been stopped by the staff and an announcement would have been made.

"Sorata... just where are you?"

_"Chapter 21" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I caught a cold around the time after I had written Sorata's outburst, and now I fell asleep at my laptop while editing it. Is there some Sorata-loving muse or deity out there, I wonder? I also shed a lot of tears over the latter half of this chapter so I was unable to work on it in public, so I took longer than usual to finish it.


	50. Intermission 5: "A letter to Mr Cat"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Sorata's POV**

Dear Mr Cat 

The other day in school, Io-sensei taught Sorata and everyone how to make letters. Io-sensei said that we can write words or draw pictures. Sorata likes letters with words. But because Sorata cannot write as well as Manami-chan, Sorata drew a picture for Mama instead. 

Sorata wanted to write a letter to Mr Cat because he has a lot of things to tell. But they cannot be told to anyone. Mr Cat is good at keeping secrets, that is why Sorata will read this letter out to you. 

Today, Mama was crying again. 

Sometimes, when Mama is alone, he cries. 

Sometimes, when Mama has a bad dream, he cries. 

Let Sorata tell Mr Cat a little secret: Mama never cries in front of Sorata. 

Sorata does not know what makes Mama so sad, but Mama says that as long as he has Sorata with him, he will be okay. 

But today, Sorata was the one who made Mama cry. 

Today is Sorata's birthday. Mama said it is a very special day when Sorata turns one year older. This year, Sorata is five years old, as big as Sakuya-kun and Manami-chan now. 

Mama let Sorata have a party today, with Sakuya-kun and Manami-chan and their Papas and Mamas. Haru-kun too! We ate lots and lots of pancakes. Sorata even got presents from Uncle Sou and Uncle Ryuu, and Uncle Naa and Uncle Mii. And of course, Mama. 

But today, Sorata became strange for a while. 

You see, Sorata only has a Mama. Sorata does not have a Papa, like Sakuya-kun and Manami-chan. So when Sorata saw them at the party today, Sorata felt his heart hurt a little. It was like a tummy ache, but a lot more nasty. Sorata does not know what happened, but he just did not like seeing his friends with their Papas. 

Also... for the first time, Sorata wondered. What happened to his Papa? Why does Sorata not have a Papa? Where did Sorata's Papa go? How did Sorata's Papa look like? 

Mama never said anything, so he does not know. 

Before bedtime, Sorata decided to ask Mama, why he does not have a Papa. Mama did not give an answer. 

Instead, Mama cried. Sorata felt bad seeing Mama cry for the first time. 

"I'm sorry." Was all Mama said, hugging Sorata tightly. 

Why did Mama apologise when Sorata had been the one who made him cry? Did Mama cry because Sorata had asked something bad? 

Sorata does not know the reason why, but he felt like a very, very bad child for making Mama cry. Mama said it was not Sorata's fault at all. But, if Sorata had not been bad, then why does Mama look so hurt and sad? 

Mama sent Sorata to bed and smiled when he put him under the blanket. But Sorata knows that Mama was still crying in his heart. 

That was when Sorata knew the reason why Mama must have always been so sad. It is because of Sorata's Papa. 

Mr Cat, Sorata is going to tell you something that you must not let Mama know. 

You see, Sorata loves seeing Mama happy the most. That is why Sorata must always be a good boy because if Sorata is good Mama will be happy. It hurts to see Mama sad, more than any ouchie could. 

That is why Sorata hates anyone and anything that makes Mama sad. 

Bad people do things like hurt others. Tell lies. Use nasty words. Play tricks that hurt people. Make others sad. Make them cry. 

Sorata's real Papa hurt Mama. 

He left Mama all alone and disappeared somewhere. 

He made Mama feel sad and lonely. 

Because of him, Mama has bad dreams. 

Because of him, Mama cries. 

Because of him, Mama cannot be happy. 

That means that Sorata's Papa, too, is a bad person. And Sorata hates him. Sorata hates everyone who hurts his Mama. 

That is why Sorata does not need his Papa. 

Sorata does not need a Papa, too. 

A girl called Ran-chan in Sorata's class told Sorata that her Papa left home when she was a baby and she recently got a new Papa who was nice to her and her Mama. 

But Sorata does not need one. If there is anyone who Sorata wants to become his Papa, they must first be a good person. Like the Sky Rangers, who always help people who are hurt by the bad ones. 

Do you know, Mr Cat? Mama always says that he loves Sorata, lots. Sorata, too, loves Mama lots and lots. 

Sorata's dream is to become a hero. A hero strong enough to protect and save Mama from everything. That is why Sorata must be strong so that Mama will never cry again. 

Sorata must always be a good boy for Mama. Good boys do not have bad papas. And good boys will never make mamas cry. 

Mama always says that he will be okay as long as he has Sorata. Sorata, too, will be okay because he has Mama. 

But Sorata will not forgive that bad person called 'Papa'. Ever. 

Even if Sorata will meet him one day, Sorata will never call him 'Papa'. 

Promise me, Mr Cat. 

Please do not tell Mama about this. 

And, like Sorata, hope that Mama will finally stop being sad. Sorata hopes Mama can smile every day, on his face and in his heart. 

More than toys or candy... even more than pancakes, that is all Sorata wants. 

Sorata does not know if his wish will ever be granted, but he will pray every day and work hard until it happens. 

**- Intermission 5: "A letter to Mr Cat" end -**


	51. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

"Sorata! Sorata, where are you?"

I had been running around the aquarium for the past fifteen to twenty minutes, covering almost everywhere but I did not spot him at all. I began to grow worried that I would never be able to find him again.

Maybe he had regretted what he did and had gone back to where Tenn-nii was... but I doubt he did. Both Tenn-nii and I are unbelievably stubborn, and if he had inherited that trait from us, he would definitely not give in so easily.

Despite that, I should still call Tenn-nii to check... oh...

Since when have I been carrying Sorata's stuffed toy... Mr Cat? And, for how long?

If I recall, it was thrown at me earlier. Have I been holding it since then?

I held the plush toy to look at it clearly. At first glance, it looked like any other regular stuffed animal. But, when I look into its eyes, I could not help but feel like it was staring back at me. And not just looking, I really meant staring.

Could it be my imagination…?

Perhaps it was, but I cannot shake off the feeling that it was more than a mere plush toy.

"I wonder if you would know where he went." I murmured to it before mentally slapping myself for doing something so silly.

Toys cannot speak, yet I was expecting for it to tell me where Sorata was. In the first place, it was not like it would know where Sorata had run off to, right? Maybe I was just too used to having the children at the kindergarten talk through them that I had forgotten that they were just toys.

That aside, Sorata!

I have to find him!

But, I already looked through the general areas... which meant that he had hidden somewhere where he would not be easy to spot. Most likely, that place was one of the zones that were dimly lit... the jellyfish zone? Or perhaps the coral reefs?

Hmmm...?

At that moment, I felt like something tugged my right hand as if beckoning me to go a certain way. However, I did not see anything or anyone when I looked down, except for Mr Cat which I was holding.

I brushed it off as something that I had imagined, but I felt it again. When I looked down again, I caught a flash of red, one that resembled the long hair of a young girl, but I only saw that for a moment. It was like something that made itself unseen to me is trying to tell me something.

It cannot be, can it?

Choosing to trust that feeling, I followed it.

It led me to the jellyfish zone, which made me frown. I have already been here once, have I not?

But, the feeling I had did not disappear, so I decided to search one more time. This time, more thoroughly.

That was when I noticed a space between two large tanks, which I had not before. It was small for an adult, but just the right size for a child to fit. I approached it slowly and Sorata was indeed there, huddled into a ball with his knees to his face.

When I slowly approached him, he looked up. He noticed me and glared at me for a second before averting his gaze. "Go away!"

"Sorata, can we talk?"

"No!"

Complete rejection, huh…

But, I still have to try.

I sat in seiza on the floor about a meter away from him, placing the plush toy on my lap.

"Do you really hate me that much, Sorata?"

"Of course! Sorata hates bad people!"

"So you think I'm a bad person?"

"Because Sensei tricked Sorata! Sensei knew that he was Sorata's real Papa and tricked him! Sensei only pretended to be kind and nice so that Sorata won't know! Sensei lied to Sorata the entire time!"

"I see… I know saying sorry may not be of help, but let me apologise to you, Sorata. Will you forgive me?"

"Sorata's real Papa is a bad person. He left Mama all alone, and made Mama sad and cry. Because of that, Mama has to try his best to smile so that Sorata won't know how he really feels. But, Sorata knows. That's why Sorata cannot forgive his Papa for what he did to Mama."

"I see…" So that is how he really feels. It seems like he had been keeping this to himself, all this while so that he would not make Tenn-nii worried. "Would you be able to forgive me, as your teacher, then?

"Sensei… Sorata liked Sensei. Sensei was kind and gentle, and very, very warm. But, Sensei lied to Sorata, right? So that Sorata won't find out that Sensei is actually his Papa when he knew all along…"

"That's not true, Sorata. I really didn't know that you were my child at first. Trust me on that. But, even after I knew, I didn't know what to do. It's true that I did things to hurt your Mama and made him cry… so I felt like I did not deserve being with the two of you. But, your Mama forgave me and gave me a chance. Sorata, when you said that you liked me, was that a lie?"

"The... The one Sorata likes is Pancakes-sensei... not his Papa."

"But I'm both your Pancakes Sensei and your Papa. And regardless what I am to you, I do love you, Sorata. The same way your Mama does, from the bottom of my heart. I would never lie about this. Could you give me a chance, too?"

"..." At least, Sorata was willing to look at me in the eye now. "Why?"

I could not understand what he had meant by that. "What do you mean by, why? Is something the matter?"

"To Sorata, his Papa had always been a bad person. Sorata was supposed to hate him. But now that Sorata knows that Sensei is his Papa, he can't. Because Sensei is a good person and Sorata cannot hate him. Sorata doesn't know anymore..."

I see... He was just confused...

I thought he had completely rejected or had truly come to hate me, but it just seems that he was just afraid to accept me.

"Sorata, here." I reached out my hands, giving him his favourite plush toy. "Mr Cat. You threw him at me earlier, didn't you?"

"Ah!" Somehow, that managed to get him to come out of the hole he was hiding in.

His expression was one of worry as he took the plush toy from me. He examined it carefully before hugging it tight to his chest. "I'm sorry for doing, Mr Cat... are you hurt? Are there any ouchies anywhere?"

From his actions, anyone could tell that he was a kind-hearted child. To think I had made such a gentle and precious child think of such hateful things... I could not help but be disappointed in myself.

"Sorata, listen. I know it's hard to accept, but you don't have to think of me as your Papa if you don't want to. But, at the very least, I hope that you will let me spend time with you. Be it as your Sensei or whatever you see me as. You're as important to me as your mother, and I want the both of you to be happy. But I want you to promise me one thing, that you won't force yourself to do anything that you don't want. If you don't like me, you don't have to force yourself to like me. If you don't want to think of me as your papa, then don't. Can you do that?"

He nodded wordlessly, looking a bit down. He seemed to regret what he had done, but what specifically I could not be sure.

"That's a good boy."

I reached my hand out to pat his hair but stopped as I was worried that he would reject me again. However, he did not even flinch, and I took it as a sign as it was okay to touch him. I gently patted his soft hair, as I always did.

"Also, could you do one more thing for me, Sorata? Make sure you apologise to your mother for what you have said to him. You didn't mean what you said to him, did you?"

"Un." He nodded, tearing up a little. "Sorata did say bad things to Mama, so he will apologise."

"Thank you, Sorata. Now, let's go back to where your Mama is, shall we?" While I was still sitting down, I reached out for his hand.

It made me happy that he did not hesitate to take.

"Let's go."

When he caught sight of us, walking together while holding hands, Tenn-nii ran up to us and hugged Sorata tightly.

"Thank goodness you're okay!" He sniffled, trying to hold back his tears. "You had me worried, you know?"

"Mama..." On the other hand, Sorata was crying rather uncontrollably. "Mama, Sorata is sorry! Sorata is sorry that he called Mama a liar and a bad person, and that he said many, many nasty things that hurt Mama! Sorata doesn't hate Mama at all! Sorata really, really loves Mama! Does Mama... still love Sorata?"

"Of course I do! How could I ever come to hate you, you adorable thing! Why did you ask something so obvious, you silly child?" He scooped Sorata up in his arms, nuzzling their cheeks together. "You really remind me of your father when he was still a child."

As I watched them interact, I felt a twinge of bitterness in my chest.

There was no place in that family for me.

That was what I felt, and had to acknowledge. I had no part in their future or deserved to be a part of their happiness. It would be better if we returned to what we had been before we got too close... the logical choice, rather than simply letting ourselves be led astray by our feelings.

I quietly took a step back. And another. Followed by a third. It seemed that they did not notice.

That is a good thing.

I should just slip away, quietly but swiftly. Just like that. Not just from this moment, but from their lives as well.

This was for the best, I decided as I turned my back to them, fighting the tears that began to build up.

I would have chosen to walk away from them if it had not been for that voice that called out to me, right at that very moment.

"Papa!"

I turned around immediately, not believing what I just heard.

Did Sorata just... did he just call me...

"Papa!"

He did! He really did!

Sorata called me Papa!

The tears building up in my eyes were now for a completely different reason.

"Riku." Tenn-nii, too, called out to me warmly. "Come over here."

My legs took the first step forward towards them before I even thought of doing so.

"Sorata, you're willing to accept me?" My voice was shaking. There were so many emotions stirring up within me that I did not know how I should feel. "As your papa?"

"Un!"

What is this incomparable feeling of joy that is welling up inside my chest?

"Good for you, Riku." Tenn-nii stretched out his other arm to me, and I embraced both him and Sorata. "We'll be counting on you from now on."

The warmth of their bodies was welcoming... so relieving. Tenn-nii's familiar honey-vanilla scent, as well as Sorata's faint jasmine, made me feel so comfortable and accepted that I could not help but let my tears spill forth.

For the first time in my life, I felt truly loved.

I could hear Tenn-nii chide me lightly, "Now now, you're not a baby anymore."

But he, too, was crying.

"Papa, Mama, don't cry, don't cry." Sorata reached out to us, wiping the tears away from our cheeks.

"Thank you so much, Tenn-nii... Sorata..." I hugged them even tighter than before, not wanting to let them go. "I promise that I won't let you both down again! I love the both of you!"

"The same goes for me too, Riku. There is no one else in the world who I can love more than the both of you. What about you, Sora?"

"Sorata loves Pan... Papa and Mama the most too!"

It is like a dream come true.

Our hearts have finally become one.

We are finally able to call ourselves a family.

And it is from this moment on that we will walk the new chapter of our lives.

_"Chapter 22" end_

**\- to be continued -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not the end! Yet! Two more chapters and the epilogue to go!
> 
> Also, the [Ko-fi](https://ko-fi.com/nazotoki) goal for Ryuu and Sougo's another story, "At first glance", has finally been reached! Thank you so much for your support (you know who you are)!. Future plans will also be announced there, so please keep track of it, and if you can, offer your support by buying me a coffee!


	52. Chapter 23A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

Despite having reconciled with each other properly and becoming a family, little in our daily lives have changed in the past three weeks. 

We still live separately from each other, only spending time together on one day of the weekend. Sorata still addresses me as "Sensei" when he is in school in front of other people, and there is nothing much going on between me and Tenn-nii due to him being busy with his work aside from our usual morning calls. 

In other words, nothing had actually changed. 

I was worried if I was the only one who felt anxious about that. Perhaps I was too insistent on the mindset that a family should live together that I had failed to consider many other factors. One of them was the issue of Tenn-nii being listed as a member of the Kujou family on the family register. That alone implied that there were a lot of things that still could not be done. 

Of course, I knew things would not move at a fast pace. However, I could not help but be disappointed by the lack of improvement or progress. 

Tenn-nii seemed to want our relationship to progress slowly, letting Sorata finish kindergarten before we make any big decisions. That includes things like his contract with Kujou, us living together and other matters. 

I could understand his point of view, and that was the reason why I chose to respect his decision. 

Today was the first weekend of the summer break when the kindergarten closes for one and a half months. 

Of course, I had to go back to work since there are many things to do, but only on certain days. 

That is why today, I was invited to be staying the weekend at that man's... Kujou's apartment for the very first time. 

We had told our close acquaintances... the Tsunashi and Rokuya couples about us dating, and how I was Sorata's birth father. We chose not to mention the fact that we were twin brothers to each other related by birth, or that Sorata had been born out of rape, as we both felt that it was not necessary for them to know at present time. I was grateful that, while they were rather surprised by the news, they did not pry into the circumstances that led to how we ended up separated and reunited, so I was grateful for their consideration. 

After that, I was told many stories about Tenn-nii and Sorata from them... and especially from Ryuu-san, of Kujou as well. 

To be honest, the more I hear about him, less I feel I know about or understand him. 

Tenn-nii had yet to hear anything from him since that day he confronted us at the festival, which was about a month ago. According to him, Kujou's work often takes him overseas and around the world, so it was hard to keep track of where he is or known when he would even return to Japan. 

Despite that, he rarely returns to the apartment when he is in the country, so that was the only reason why I agreed to spend the night there. If he were there, I would have been too uncomfortable to be there. 

"Papa!" 

Tenn-nii and Sorata... as well as his plush toy were waiting for me outside the building. 

Sorata was beamed when he caught sight of me. Tenn-nii, as beautiful as always, smiled too as I approached them. "Good afternoon, Riku." 

"Sorata! Tenn-nii! Sorry to have kept you waiting!" 

"What are you saying? You're fifteen minutes early." After I had given Sorata a hug as our usual greeting, Tenn-nii and I gave each other a kiss on the cheek. "Sorata could not stay still at home, so we decided to wait for you down here." 

"Papa, what did you bring?" 

"Pudding! Tamaki-sensei from the kindergarten recommended them! You don't hate pudding, don't you?" 

"Sorata likes them... but not as much as pancakes." 

"We can have that for dessert after dinner." Tenn-nii took my hand and tugged it, beckoning me to enter the building with them. "I received some madeleines from work yesterday, so we can have those for our afternoon snack with some tea. But first, we have someone that we would like you to meet." 

"Eh?" 

Who, I wonder? 

"Speaking of which," Tenn-nii added while I was still pondering over the matter. "Tonight's dinner will be omelette rice." 

"Really?" I haven't had Tenn-nii's omelette rice in ages, that made me excited. 

The only impression I had of the apartment... their home was that it was a fancy place. While my wages was enough for a single man to live a comfortable life, it was definitely too little... no, probably not enough to afford the monthly rent for a place this nice. 

"Papa, are you okay?" He tugged on my pants, looking up at me in worry. "Papa was making a funny face." 

"I guess I was." I chuckled, reaching down to pat his head. "Oh, by the way, where is the person Mama wanted me to meet?" 

"Oh! She's over here! Come! Sorata will introduce her to you!" 

I was curious as to who he was referring to, as I did not see anyone. However, when I noticed that the small shrine at the corner of the living room, I knew immediately who both Tenn-nii and Sorata were referring to. 

"Big sister, Papa's here today. Mama and Sorata invited him over to meet you." Sorata smiled at the spirit tablet that was placed on the shrine, then at me. "Papa, say hello to Sorata's big sister." 

"O-Oh." The scene had touched me earlier and made my chest tighten. 

Sorata's older sister, which means our... Tenn-nii and my daughter. 

"You see, Papa, Mama said that Sorata's big sister had become a star in the sky a long time ago, when Sorata was still a tiny little baby. But Mama also said that she comes to visit us sometimes, so Sorata leaves treats for big sister to eat when she does!" 

"I see..." 

"Ah! Sorry, Papa, Sorata's gotta poo-poo! Mama!" 

"Coming, dear!" Tenn-nii, who had been in the kitchen preparing drinks, came over. 

"Papa, can you talk to big sister while Sorata does his poo-poo?" 

"Sure... take your time." 

Was, what I said, but I could not help but feel awkward just after a few seconds of sitting on the floor in front of the altar. What should I talk to her about? I mean, I have seen ghosts and spirits and spoken to them before, but talking to a spirit tablet... and, it felt rather strange. 

However, what felt the most unsettling was that I could not shake off the feeling that someone was staring at me, quite intensely, too. 

It felt a bit scary to turn around, but I did. All I saw was Mr Cat, Sorata's plush toy. 

It should have been a relief, but the fact that somethingfelt off about that toy made me even more worried. Perhaps I was nervous and was thinking too much? 

I closed my eyes and heaved a sigh of relief before turning around to face the altar. 

However, when I opened my eyes again, I saw a young girl... a child around Sorata's age with long red hair sitting on the altar. She had large eyes and pale skin and was wearing a loose white dress that reached slightly above her knees. 

"Whoa!" 

"Shh." She put her finger my lips, although I could not feel anything. "Make a loud sound or do anything suspicious and I'll do something nasty to you. Got it?" 

I nodded. 

Who was she? 

No, wait. 

I know the answer to that. 

It was obvious, from the appearance. The shape of her face... her eyes... the colour of her hair... her uncanny features... 

After having encountered Sorata, it became more obvious to me who she was. 

There was no doubt about it. 

"You're..." 

"I'm Nanase Seira." She smiled at me, aware that I realised who she was. "Nice to meet you, Papa." 

**\- to be continued -**


	53. Chapter 23B

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

Nanase... Seira...

As expected, our daughter.

But why is she here?

According to everyone I knew, she had passed away the same day she was born. Yet, she appeared to me right now... wait, she appeared to me before, did she not? At the aquarium, when I was looking for Sorata.

Yet, she appeared to me right now... wait, she appeared to me before, did she not? At the aquarium, when I was looking for Sorata.

"Are you really our daughter? Mine and Tenn-nii's…"

"You doubt me?"

"Your Mama said that you passed away a long time ago... when you were only a few hours old. No one would know how you would have grown up to look like. Yet you are here, in this form, as a child."

"Well, you're the one who can see me, so it's up to you to believe."

She has a point, "To be honest, you look so much like me that it's impossible to deny the connection. Why are you here, though?"

"I wonder, actually."

"Eh?"

"By the time I was aware of it, I was still here. Of course, I wasn't able to take a proper form like this at the start. When Sora-chan was still a baby, I was just a little ball of light. But now, you see me like this. Maybe it's because I grew up while he did, I guess. We are twins, after all, so we may still be connected somehow."

"Ah... I see..."

What is with this situation?

"If anything, I guess I only want to see them happy... that's why I chose to stay in this world."

"Happy... huh..."

"I'm sure you know this, but Mama never thinks for himself. Mama is always wishing for everyone else to be happy, but he doesn't think of being happy himself. That's why I can't leave Mama alone. Sora-chan's just like Mama, so I can't help but worry about him, too. But, since they can't see me, there's nothing I can do but watch over them. At least, until Papa came along."

"Is that why you helped me?"

"I know that Papa isn't a bad person. Ever since Mama met Papa again, and through the way you act with Sora-chan, I could tell. But Sora-chan doesn't. He loves Mama so much, and like me, all he wants is for Mama to be happy. But he's so like Mama that he thinks the same way he would, and it can't be helped."

"I see..."

What she said were simply reminders of how Sorata had poured out his feelings and opinions to me.

Right now, he said that he accepted and loved me.

But, I could not imagine how things would have ended up if he did not.

"Say, Papa, could you promise me two things?"

"What is it?"

"The first, promise that you won't tell anyone about me. Not even Mama."

I could guess why she made that request, so I did not question her reason why. "I promise."

"The second, I want you to make Mama and Sora-chan happy. That's all I ask for."

Seira...

"Of course. You can count on me."

But now that I think about it, why have I not noticed Seira until now?

"Um—"

"I know what you want to ask, Papa. You wanted to know how you've never noticed me, right? I usually stay inside Sora-chan's Mr Cat. That way, I can get lots of cuddles from Sora-chan!"

"Oh!"

Well, that explains why I felt something from it.

"But all I can do is to stay inside it. It's not like I can move its arms and feet and make them my own. Even if I could, I wouldn't. That'll scare Sora-chan and make him cry, right?"

"I see."

The way she was so chatty really reminded me of myself, and it made me smile.

"Ah! Mama and Sora-chan are almost done. Sorry Papa, but I'll talk to you another time."

"You aren't going to pass on to the afterlife? If there's one, I mean..."

"Hmmm... I don't have the intention to for now. Sora-chan's still small, so I'd like to watch over him for a little longer. But now that Papa's part of the family, I'm sure everything will be okay, and also a lot more fun!"

"Fun?"

"Well, then, bye bye!"

"Ah!" She disappeared before I could say anything else, and Sorata reappeared right at that very moment.

"Papa! Sorry to keep you waiting! Let's go have tea!"

"Sora, don't forget to give some to your big sister first!" Tenn-nii stepped out of the kitchen with a basket of the madeleines in one hand, and a small plate with just one in the other. "Sorry, Riku, could you help me bring out the tea and Sorata's juice?"

"Coming!"

As I went into the kitchen, I watched Tenn-nii give Sorata the small plate to place at the altar. He was back when I set the teapot and plastic cup and dragged me to the kitchen sink to wash our hands. Tenn-nii was done setting the table with the plates and teacups when we were. Sorata climbed onto the seat opposite of me, and Tenn-nii took the one next to him.

We gave our thanks before reaching out for one of the baked treats.

I bit into the one I took and savoured the sweet taste on my tongue, accompanied by a hint of lemon.

"These are really good!"

"Yummy!"

"Have some with the tea. These leaves were a gift too, from someone in my talent agency for my birthday."

I picked up my cup, which was filled with the tea that Tenn-nii had served me. Before drinking it, I took a whiff of its aroma, which Nagi had taught me to when we first drank tea together.

"It smells really good... is this earl grey?"

"Indeed, it is. I'm surprised you know."

"Nagi taught me a lot about the different kinds of tea back when I was still a student. I used to visit Iori and Mitsuki's family's cafe a lot back in the day, and so did Nagi, so as we spent time together he taught me many things."

"I see."

"Papa, Mama, can Sorata have another?" Sorata asked us, having finished his first madeleine.

He had been nibbling on it like a mouse, unlike me who was taking big bites. Tenn-nii, too, was taking small bites in between our conversation. When he asked, I had just finished my third, and Tenn-nii his second.

"Sure." Tenn-nii took one from the basket and placed it on his plate. "But make this your last one, since you won't have enough room in your little tummy for dinner afterwards."

"Okay!"

This time, both of us watched him eat. He really was like a small mammal, and I could not find words other than cute to describe him.

"Tenn-nii, why is our son so adorable?" I murmured my thoughts out, fawning over him.

"That's one of the few ways he takes after you, my dear."

"Really?"

"Really." He looked like he was going to continue speaking, but instead, he reached out to touch my face. swiping his finger across the corner of my lips. I was confused as to why he did that, but I soon realised why when he explained. "You had some crumbs on your face, so I helped you to remove them."

"Thank you, Tenn-nii."

"It's my pleasure." It was then that the doorbell rang, and that made Tenn-nii look confused. "Strange. We aren't expecting anyone other than you today. Give me a moment; I'll go see who it is."

"Sure."

"Papa, Sorata is done!" He announced as Tenn-nii left the room. "It was so, so yummy!"

"Yes, it was, but you got lots of crumbs over your face. Do you want Papa to help you get those off?"

"Yes, please!"

"Let's go to the bathroom, then."

While that had been the situation that had arose from the series of events, the truth was that I had wanted to make sure that Tenn-nii was alright. Just before the doorbell had rung, I felt a shiver go down my spine. I knew that feeling, and I did not like it.

And as always, I was right, when I saw the person in the doorway.

"Kujou..."

Sorata, having caught sight of him, hid behind me. Because he was holding my leg, I could tell that he was trembling, quite terribly too.

"Ah. You're here too, Nanase Riku. Perfect. I wanted to check up on the two of you. Shall we have a small chat, over some tea?"

**\- to be continued -**


	54. Chapter 23C

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

About five minutes had passed since Kujou showed up at the front door of the apartment. 

It really seemed that he only intended to talk over tea. The moment he entered, he headed straight for the dining room, sat down at the table and made himself at home. Then again this apartment does belong to him, but that is not the point! 

There were some madeleines left over, so Tenn-nii served them to him with the cup of tea he requested. Both Tenn-nii and I sat opposite him as he took his time to savour the treats. 

On the other hand, we had a different sort of predicament on our hands.

"Papa, help! The demon king has come to eat Sorata!"

Sorata had been clinging onto me ever since Kujou came in. He would not let go of me no matter how I tried to convince him, so had no choice but to carry him because I would be unable to move if he continued to hold onto my leg. However, the moment I sat down, at the table, he started to cry. 

Knowing how much Kujou cared for Sorata, it felt rather perplexing to see him so afraid of the man.

Just what did he to make him so scared, I wonder?

"Sorata, calm down, okay? Kujou...san may look scary, but I don't think he's going to eat you."

"No!"

"Should I bring you into the bedroom, then?"

"No! Sorata wants Papa!"

This was going nowhere.

Kujou was still enjoying his tea, seemingly not bothered by what was happening.

Tenn-nii seemed as worried as I was, although I was not sure about what. He was constantly shifting his gaze between the two of us and Kujou, but it was still unclear to me.

"Tenn-nii, what should I do?" I whispered to him.

"I'm sorry, Riku. If he's unwilling to be separated from you, then I no longer have the ability to do anything to help you. You'll have to either wait until he feels like settling down or until he tires himself out from crying and falls asleep."

Oh boy...

"Papa..."

"Papa's here with you." I patted his back gently, hoping that he would calm down.

Sorata aside, it was extremely awkward to be sitting here right now. Kujou said he wanted to talk, but the conversation had not even begun.

In fact, he took his time to finish both the tea and treats before beginning.

"Now then, let us begin, shall we?" After he had spoken those words, he took an envelope out of his briefcase. In it was a slip of paper... a contract, or so it seemed at first glance. "Tenn, I'm sure you remember this."

"Of course, I do. This was the contract that I signed with you after I had agreed to go with you."

"Indeed, it is."

"What about it?"

"If you recall, it is stated as the final clause of this contract that, if the amount in terms of monetary gain that had been made from the contracts secured by your efforts as a courtesan is at least double the amount paid for all expenses that had been provided for both you and your child, this contract will, therefore, be considered void."

I had to listen carefully to comprehend the entire sentence, as it was long and somewhat confusing. If I was not mistaken, it meant that if Tenn-nii manages to earn double the amount Kujou had provided for him and Sorata, then he would be freed from the contract. At least, that was what I hope it implied. However, now was not the appropriate time to ask.

Tenn-nii only nodded in acknowledgement to what Kujou said. He chose not to speak as well, allowing to finish before doing so himself.

"Tenn, do you remember how many customers you have slept with?"

That question felt like an insult to me. I knew that he made Tenn-nii use his body to provide for Sorata, but I did not think that he would be so direct about it. Yet, I have not thought about Tenn-nii that way even once.

"Do you mean the number of times in total, of the number of clients?"

"Whichever you remember better."

"Throughout the past five years, I had to attend more than four hundred events. In total, I had to entertain at least eighty different clients from over fifty different organisations and companies. With the exception for that party aboard the cruise hosted by CEO Midou which I was simply made to accompany the elderly Mr Murosawa, then the Minister of Defence, slept with each and every one of them."

T-That many?!

I was shocked by those numbers. I glanced towards Tenn-nii, who did not meet my gaze. He had his head hung low and away from me, probably in shame.

I could not blame him for feeling that way, although I felt that there was no reason for him to do so. After all, there may have been people who would have been put off by those numbers.

However, all I could feel was remorse and anger, at myself for being a failure. Tenn-nii worked so hard all these years, just to be able to provide and care for Sorata. I did nothing at all to relieve his burdens. Even if it was because I was left in the position to not be able to do anything, I still felt that I should have been there for them. I am Tenn-nii's partner and Sorata's father, after all.

But, what I can now is to hold Tenn-nii's hand, which he had rested on the table. I did that to assure him that I did not think of him or his actions as anything negative, but instead had chosen to accept him. Just like how he had accepted me.

"Kujou-san, what point are you trying to make by bringing this up?"

"It seemed that I had offended you, but it was not my intention. Please accept my apologies."

"… Right."

"Rather than to state a point, I was simply stating the context prior to the matter at hand."

"What matter are you referring to, in particular?" Tenn-nii asked, squeezing my hand lightly as he did.

"Don't glare at me like that, Tenn. I am here to bring good news to you today, after all."

"I apologise for being rude, Kujou-san, but it's never good news when you say that it is."

"Oh, it is, for sure."

It was then that I noticed something. Why was Kujou so relaxed?

In the first place, it was strange how he was not hostile to me, despite the fact that he had explicitly stated his disapproval of my relationship with Tenn-nii during our first encounter. If anyone had found the person they despised in their home, they would surely be upset, if not angry. Yet he showed none of that in both his tone, words and body language. He even acknowledged my presence when he came in.

What exactly did he come here for?

Good news... the contract... the thing about its last clause...

Wait. 

Could it be...?

"Hmph. I see that you have figured it out, Nanase Riku."

"What?" Tenn-nii looked at me, surprised. "Figured out... what?" 

"Congratulations, Tenn. You have managed to surpass my expectations, and hence would no longer be bound by this contract."

"Wait. Wait a minute." Tenn-nii looked even more confused than he already was, to the point that he wore a pained expression. "I don't understand what's going on at all."

"At the beginning of this fiscal year, the business contracts that I had managed to secure with your efforts had made more of a profit than I had expected them to. Not just one, but several of them. I had expected them to reach the estimated amount over a decade, yet it only took half the time." Kujou took a slow sip of his tea before continuing. "I am a man of my word, as the person who created this contract I am obliged to follow what I had decided."

"But, if you had known since April, why wait until now to tell me?"

"I had wanted to surprise you. That was why I had brought up the topic of marriage back then. As you would no longer be bound to me, I thought that it was a good time that you settle down, along with a suitable partner who cares for you and Sorata. It was rather obvious how Yaotome-kun's only son was smitten with you, so he was the only candidate available that I was able to trust. However, you meeting Nanase Riku and getting close to him was out of my calculations, so I failed to predict that things would have turned out the way it did."

"I see..."

"Nanase Riku. I see that you, too, have upheld your end of our deal."

"Deal?"

"The condition that I had set for you, if you had wanted to spend the rest of your life with Tenn. I see that Sorata had managed to accept the truth, and that is all I need to know."

"Oh." I followed Kujou's gaze and noticed that Sorata had fallen asleep in my arms. 

He must have exhausted himself and dozed off. No wonder he had been so quiet all this while. I was so caught up in the conversation.

"I came here just to tell what I have already told you both. Everything from here on out, be it the present, near future or the future that is yet to come, is up to the two of you."

"We know and understand that."

"Now then, I have an important dinner to attend so I would have to get going. But, before that, I have a present for the both of you." 

Kujou then took something small out of his briefcase and set it on the table in front of us.

Those are... "Keys...?"

"Indeed they are. These are keys to the apartment on the floor below this one. I had purchased it, as I did this one. Take it as my gift to the both of you."

"W-We can't accept something so expensive!" I stammered my honest thoughts out as they ran through my head.

"I had initially prepared it as Tenn's wedding gift to the Yaotome boy. However, seeing how that will no longer be possible, it would go to waste. Instead, take it as my present to you, to congratulate you on the reunion of your family. The apartment is already furnished with everything that you would need, so you may start the preparations to move in anytime you'd like."

"M-Move in?!"

You mean... I get to stay with Tenn-nii and Sorata, under the same roof?

We would get to stay together, just like family?

"Thank you, Kujou-san." Tenn-nii took the keys with the hand that was not holding mine, grasping it tightly in his palm. "I will never forget what you have done for me and Sorata."

"I look forward to receiving some good news in the future. Perhaps, an invitation of sorts." 

He had said that while looking at me, and I could guess what he implied. I was unsure if Tenn-nii did, however.

With that last line, Kujou left the apartment, as swiftly as he appeared. 

That left Tenn-nii and I staring at each other.

"Shall we head down and check it out?" I asked, unsure of what I should do now.

"I believe this can wait until later. Let's go tuck Sorata into bed first, then start the preparations for dinner. It's getting a little late."

"Got it."

"But to think that we can actually live together as a family this soon... it feels like a magic spell of happiness has been cast on us, doesn't it, Riku?"

"Yes, it does. I really hope that we can sleep together in the same bed, just like how we used to as children."

"It's no longer the same."

Eh?

How so, I was about to ask, but Tenn-nii gave me the answer as soon as I thought of asking.

"Because we have Sorata with us now, don't we?"

We both looked down at him, our precious child who was snoozing peacefully while snuggled up to my chest.

"Yes... you're right."

_"Chapter 23" end_

**\- to be continued -**


	55. Final Chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

"Wow... this place is... amazing..."

"I'd say. I wonder how much money Kujou-san spent doing up this place."

"Everything's so bright and clean, isn't it, Mama, Papa?"

After dinner and washing the dishes, we decided to check out the place Kujou-san had said he had provided us, before our bathtime. We took the stairs at the end of the corridor to go a floor down. Tenn-nii brought the keys with him, so he was the one who opened the door.

Despite having just entered the apartment, yet we were already amazed by what we saw upon turning on the light.

As Kujou had said, the entire apartment was already renovated and furnished. Well, at least the main areas and two bedrooms were.

The living-dining area was done up nicely. In the kitchen, the polished counters and stoves were already installed, as well as electronic appliances such as the refrigerator and a microwave. In the dining area, there was a table with four chairs, in a design that was somewhat similar to the one upstairs.

In the living room, there was the couch set and coffee table, as well as the television and its stand. In the corner, there was also an empty altar set up, something that I felt appreciative of.

As for the rooms, the master bedroom and one other room, which was intended to be Sorata's, were ready. The other two were left empty.

We went to see Sorata's room first. Everything from the wallpaper to the furniture was cat-themed, much to his delight. The bed prepared seemed too big for his small frame but too small for an adult, while the desk and chair was the expensive type I saw before in a catalogue that was able to adapt to a growing child throughout his schooling years. In another corner, by the foot of the bed, there was a bookshelf and beanbag for lazing around, as well as a toy box.

"Next will be Papa and Mama's room!" Sorata declared after he was done admiring his.

I had initially thought that it was just the bright lighting that had given the apartment a brighter impression at first. The one above felt darker, but it was the colour scheme of the walls and furniture made it seem that way. It came clear when I saw our bedroom. Our walls were painted in cream, and the wood of the floor was a light brown. The furniture, too, was in basic and somewhat colours so it certainly made the atmosphere a lot different.

However, I could not get over how huge, or rather, wide the bed was.

"It's huge isn't it, Riku?"

"It is huge indeed, Tenn-nii."

While the both of us could only look at the bed with a bewildered expression, Sorata was climbing onto the onto the bed, rolling around a bit before lying in a sploot on the covers. "It's so soft and fluffy!"

I could understand his excitement. This is his first time in a new place, and it was one where he could finally live with both of his parents. I, too, was just as excited at the idea of being able to live with and see them every day.

"Say, Mama, Papa, can we sleep here tonight? Together?"

"Eh?" I blinked, not knowing how to reply him. "Mmm, I'm not sure if we could. What do you think, Tenn-nii?"

"Well, we could always bring our pillows and other necessities down. The sink and toilet work, and so does the air conditioning. There are sheets on the bed, too, and pillows. If you don't mind the trouble to move things from the apartment to here, I suppose we could. After all, the bed upstairs isn't large enough to fit all three of us."

"Really?" Sorata's eyes sparkled. "Yay! Thank you, Mama!"

"But we'll be taking our bath upstairs, first."

"Yes, Mama!"

When we returned to Kujou's apartment, we first gathered the things that we would need and wanted to bring downstairs while the tub was being filled. We had decided that tomorrow morning, we would brush our teeth there before coming back up to make breakfast.

Tenn-nii made me take a bath first, and bring Sorata in with me. However, he was so restless from the excitement that he was unable to stay still even in the tub. If I had not been careful, he may have tried to run out buck naked.

"Papa, hurry, hurry!"

"Be a bit more patient, Sorata. Mama's still in the bath, and I have to dry your hair."

"Aww..."

He was sulking, or rather, pouting. While I had thought of that expression as adorable, there was really nothing that I could do to meet his demands.

Sorata was the only one who had changed into his pyjamas… a pair of footed cat onesies, in the colour and with a pattern that resembled that of his favourite plush toy. It even had a pair of ears sewn onto the hood and a tail at his rear.

Tenn-nii and I decided to wear our usual clothes, then change into our pyjamas at the apartment. I took a glance earlier, but Tenn-nii still wears proper pyjamas like he used to. As for me, I was too used to my combination of T-shirt and sweatpants to go back to wearing those that Tenn-nii does.

"Mama, Papa, can we go yet?“

The moment Tenn-nii came out of the bath and sat down beside me, Sorata asked once again, holding Mr Cat in his arms.

"Just a little while more, Sora." Tenn-nii sighed lightly, as he had only just picked up the hair dryer to dry his long hair.

"But Sorata already waited for so long already!"

"Sorata, if you can wait for Mama to get ready, I'll make special pancakes for breakfast tomorrow."

The moment I mentioned his favourite food, Sorata turned to me, his eyes sparkling with anticipation.

"Special… pancakes? What kind?"

"Chocolate chips!"

"Ooh! Sorata never had chocolate chip pancakes before! That sounds really yummy!"

"Would you be able to be patient and wait, then?"

"Yes! Sorata can wait!"

"There you go, spoiling him again," Tenn-nii commented with a slight frown, but it did not seem to be his intention to tell me off.

"You say that, but haven't you been the one spoiling him all this time, Tenn-nii?"

"I can't deny that, or say that you're wrong, but," He reached for my cheek and pinched it. He meant it teasingly, I knew, but the pain came unexpectedly and made me let out a yelp. "Since when were you so cheeky, learning to talk back to me like that?"

"I'm sorry, Tenn-nii!"

"That doesn't answer my question, but I'll let it slide this time." He put the hair dryer down for a moment and leaned over, pressing a quick peck to the same cheek he pinched.

Noting how chummy we were getting, Sorata climbed onto my lap to get my attention.

"Sorata wants to kiss Papa too!" He did not wait for me to say anything after his little declaration and pressed his lips to my other cheek. "Muah!"

He is so adorable that I could die.

"Papa's gonna give you lots of kisses too!" I hugged him tightly, making him squeal. I nuzzled our cheeks together before giving him several little kisses in return.

"Here, Papa! Mr Cat too!"

"Oh!" I may have found the notion of doing that awkward, but I knew that Seira... our daughter and Sorata's older sister, was residing in the plush toy, so I gave it a kiss on its whiskered cheek as Sorata had asked me to.

Tenn-nii, who had been brushing his hair, declared that we were almost ready to head down. All that was left was to turn off switches, lights, and ensure that nothing was out of place.

Seeing how Sorata was in his pyjamas and would not be able to wear his shoes, I helped to carry him down, one hand holding his sneakers and balancing my bag on one shoulder. Tenn-nii followed behind us with the other things that we needed, including Sorata's pillow.

We had intended to tuck Sorata into bed first, seeing how it was close to his usual bedtime, but he was not sleepy yet. This was probably due to the excitement from earlier. In the end, we failed to convince him, so we decided to take turns reading to him while the other goes to get ready for bed.

I went first as always, and when I came back, Tenn-nii was in the middle of reading him his favourite book.

"That brings back memories, doesn't it... The Sun-bridge to Heaven."

"It was our favourite tale, after all."

"It's Sorata's favourite too!"

"I'll take over, so you can go wash up. Where did you stop?"

"At the part where the man is about to meet the Sun Goddess." Tenn-nii handed me the book. "I'll be quick and come back as soon as I can."

"You can take your time, Tenn-nii."

I slid under the covers next to Sorata, on his right side. With the book in hand, I began to read to h from the top of the page. He was still cuddling his plush toy, listening earnestly as I read to him. He did start to look drowsy at the last few pages and seemed like he was about to nod off. I asked if he wanted to sleep first, but he was stubborn and insisted on waiting for Tenn-nii, who returned just when I had finished the story.im

Together, we tucked Sorata in, who fell asleep the moment he let his eyes close.

By that time, we, too, were exhausted and decided to turn in for the night. Before we lay down to sleep, we first bade each other good night, with a warm embrace and a gentle kiss.

"Good night, Tenn-nii."

"Good night, Riku. Sweet dreams."

"Same to you."

That night, I had a nostalgic dream.

It was a memory of the past, long forgotten, of me and Tenn-nii back when we were still children. Not as young as Sorata, but not old enough that we knew anything too complicated about the world we live in.

I cannot exactly remember how old we were then, but it was something that happened during the winter months. I had been hospitalised yet again, and Tenn-nii had come to visit me.

_"Tenn-nii, you don't have to come every day. You have friends to play with, don't you? You should be spending time with them instead of with me. It's boring here since there really isn't anything to do, right?"_

_"It's fine."_ He had answered with his usual gentle smile. _"I'm here because I want to be with Riku. Or, does Riku not want me around? Have you come to hate me?"_

I shook my head profusely. _"There's no way that I could ever hate Tenn-nii!"_

 _"That's a good boy."_ He praised me as he patted my head. _"Mom and Dad bought some books for you to read. All of them are new releases so you can take your time to enjoy them."_

_"Thanks, Tenn-nii! I'll read them later."_

_"Make sure you thank Mom and Dad when they drop by, too."_

_"Of course!"_

I was not sure what came over me that day, at that time. Even though Tenn-nii being with me was a happy occasion, I suddenly felt a bit sad. Tenn-nii did not fail to notice it and put his warm hand on my shoulder.

_"Is something the matter?"_

_"I was just thinking of something, Tenn-nii. How do you think we'll be like when we grow up?"_

_"Do you mean in terms of what we will work as, and what we will become?"_

_"Mmm... not that. It's more like whether or not we will still be close. You know, like how we get along now."_

_"I see... But what brought this up?"_

_"You see, today I was playing with one of the other kids in the activity room after class, and she told me that her Mom and Dad are going through something called divorce. I asked the nurse earlier what it meant, and she told me that it's when two people who used to love each other don't anymore and ended up choosing not to see each other again. So it made me think, what if Tenn-nii and I got into some huge fight that made us hate each other, and if I won't get to see Tenn-nii again... or something like that..."_

_"You dummy!"_

_"Ouch!"_ As I was brooding on the topic, Tenn-nii landed a chop on my head, causing me to cry out in pain. _"What was that for, Tenn-nii?"_

 _"You really are silly, aren't you?"_ He huffed, propping his hands on his hips, cheeks puffed up as he frowned at me. _"You know there's no way I can hate you. Also, it's not like we always get along, right? We had our fair share of fights and quarrels. Or, are you saying that you could actually hate me?"_

_"No! I could never hate Tenn-nii! Ever! I love Tenn-nii the most!"_

_"That's why I called you a dummy. It because you always worry about things that won't happen."_

_"B-But we'll never know if we'll still be together when we become adults, right?"_

_"Riku, calm down and listen to me. We are twin brothers and have been together ever since we were in our mother's tummy. We were together as babies, toddlers... even now we are still together. Of course, we can't be together all the time, right?"_

_"Like when I'm in the hospital?"_

_"That's just one of those times. But, when we grow up and become proper adults, we may not be together anymore since we have to live our own lives..."_

_"No! I don't want that! I don't ever want to be separated from Tenn-nii!"_

_"I told you to calm down, Riku. I'm not done speaking yet. I know the thought of us not being together is something that is difficult and unbearable. But, even if we are apart, it does not mean that we hate each other or anything, right?"_

_"Even so..."_

_"Riku, you don't have to worry. For me, the most important person in this world is you. Even if we fight and argue and disagree on things, to the point that we get angry and not talk to each other for a while, I still love you very much. And I'm sure that these feelings will not change."_

_"Tenn-nii..."_

_"What about you, Riku?"_

_"I love Tenn-nii lots, too! Tenn-nii is also the most important person to me, that's why I want us to stay together forever. Is that... no good?"_

Tenn-nii patted my head again. _"Well, we won't know until we grow up..."_

 _"I know... but..."_ I did know that what Tenn-nii said was the truth, but at that age, growing up felt like something that was very far off in the future and the thought of it brought many uncertainties. _"T-Tenn-nii!"_

_"Don't raise your voice all of a sudden. What is it?"_

_"I'll make a promise, that Tenn-nii will still be my most favourite person and that I'll always love you no matter what happens!"_

_"If that's the case, I'll make that same promise to you. Riku, you'll always be the one I love the most."_

_"Pinky promise?"_

_"Pinky promise."_

We linked our pinkies together, sealing that promise that we had probably forgotten about as we slowly became adults.

And, right after that scene, I woke up.

The warm, bright light from the uncovered windows indicated that it was morning. The sun had risen probably a while ago, or so I presumed since it was a lot brighter than the hour that I usually wake up. I was tempted to turn away and go back to sleep, but the unfamiliar comfort of the bed I was sleeping in made me jolt awake instead.

I sat up, a bit dazed, and took a look around the room. It took my brain a long moment to realise and remember that this was not the apartment I had been living in for the past six years, but the new one that Kujou had provided for us.

And when I turned to my left and looked down, I was greeted with an indescribable sight.

The peaceful sleeping faces of the two people I treasure most in my life. Tenn-nii, who I love so, so dearly and Sorata, our beloved son.

It made my chest feel warm with a soft and fluffy kind of feeling.

Tenn-nii looks the same as he used to when he was sleeping. He had the tendency to be quite tense, so when he sleeps he is completely relaxed and that makes his facial features look softer. Perhaps it was just me, but somehow, he looks a lot more beautiful than I had remembered him to be.

Sorata, surprisingly, barely looks like Tenn-nii when he sleeps. If anything, the way he sleeps is probably closer to the way I do. He sleeps on his side, curling up into a ball while cuddling his plush toy tightly.

They were both sleeping so soundly that it felt a bad idea waking them up. That was why I simply watched them, letting a smile find itself on my face.

The fact that the three of us had become a family had not hit me so hard until this very moment. There were a number of reasons, like how we were not close physically, but now it does not matter. The more time I spent with them, the more I wanted us to live together. That way, we would always be together.

Even if it was not immediately, I did not think that that wish would come true so soon.

Now that I have known this happiness, I can say confidently that I have truly been blessed. Not just by some God or deity, but by their very existence as well. After all, not everyone who had done something as terrible as I had would be given the chance to redeem themselves.

The thought that I would soon be able to spend the rest of my life with them, and to wake up to this wonderful sight every morning... that is more than what I could ever ask for.

And, you know what?

I get the feeling that things from here on will change.

It may not be easy. But if it is one thing that I am sure of, is that it will be for the better.

Just like how the sun rises at the start of each day, I will never stop showering them with my love and gratitude, and much, much more. All that I can offer, I will give to them.

This is a new promise, an oath that I have decided to make to them.

One that I will never forget, and never fail to keep.

Now, and forever.

_"Chapter 24 - Final Chapter" end_

**\- the end -**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's still the epilogue! Just a little more to go!


	56. Epilogue - Tenn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Tenn's POV**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It appears to me that some people thought that the final chapter was really the end and that it seemed that I was joking about having an epilogue since today is April Fools. Well, the joke's on you if you did. I just didn't say that there would be two of them. Enjoy!
> 
> For those who have trouble seeing the image in the last chapter, you may find it [here on Facebook](https://www.facebook.com/doujinkanezudango/photos/a.141678019336011.1073741827.134373716733108/790670684436738/?type=3&permPage=1).

By the end of summer, Riku, Sorata and I were finally able to live together as a family.

Riku moved out of his current apartment, and me and Sora out of Kujou's. It took a bit of time to pack and consolidate our belongings, but we managed to make it by the end of the summer holidays.

It felt a little sad to have to leave a place I had called home for the past five and a half years, but the joy of being able to live with Riku again made things exciting instead.

Before we moved in together, we decided to return to our parents' home for the Bon festival. I had been scared, as I did not know how to face my mother, but I and Sorata were welcomed with open arms. We told our parents of our decision to stay together to raise Sorata, fearing that they would be against the idea, but instead, they accepted it.

However, that does not mean that everything in our lives and relationship had improved.

A few weeks after we had moved in, around the beginning of the last week of September, my heat came as predicted. Since Riku knew of my trauma, that I wanted to be left alone, he was worried. He was definitely affected by my pheromones, but I could see how hard he was trying to control himself. He let me make a choice, whether he wanted me by his side. I still gave in to my fears and asked to be left by myself. He accepted my decision and offered to take care of Sorata for the duration of my heat. The both of them went to stay with the Rokuya family during that time, instead of the Tsunashis who I usually depend on as Sougo-san had just given birth.

To be honest, that was the worst decision I made.

For the first time, I felt unbearably lonely.

I wanted someone to be with me, not just by my side, but to touch me. Kiss me. Make love to me. Never before had I felt such a strong desire for an Alpha's embrace.

But not just any Alpha would do.

The one I wanted was Riku. My heart had decided that the only one who could satisfy me was him.

At first, I was appalled and disgusted at myself for thinking that way. But more than anything else, I was confused. However, it became clear to me once I was able to think clearly. I only felt this way because I love him.

But, after what happened between the both of us, I was not sure if we were both ready for our relationship to reach that stage yet. I knew that this was something that was not for me to decide alone, so I would have to talk to him about it at another time.

Riku and Sorata returned after my heat subdued. That was yesterday.

The first thing that Sorata did upon seeing me was to give me a big hug and a kiss on a cheek. Riku, too, did the same. Their scents and warmth, which I had missed, made my heart tighten a little.

Today was a weekend, and we had plans to visit the Tsunashi family home. Not just for Sorata's usual playdate, but to check up on Sougo-san and his newborn child, who had returned home from the hospital not long ago. Ryuu had already sent me a picture of his child, the proud father that he always was.

When we arrived, Sougo-san introduced the child proudly, whom he cradled in his arms.

"Everyone, meet Shizuki."

"Shii-kun?" Sorata looked at the infant with awe, standing on the couch next to where Sougo-san was sitting so that he could see him. "So small! Hello!"

"He looks more like you than Ryuu-san," Riku commented, looking at the infant with interest.

We spent the entire afternoon with them until we had dinner.

Most of the time, Riku's attention had been on the baby. I could not help but notice that, and it bothered me somewhat. I was curious about why he had been so taken with the child. As a parent, I know the warm feeling that comes when looking at a newborn child.

What was it that had Riku so enamoured?

Was it his love for children? Was it because he had thought that the newborn was adorable? Or, perhaps, he wanted another child of his own?

I was not sure. Perhaps there was more than one reason, but it had made me feel a little insecure.

I felt that I should not be.

After all, we are together now.

Yet, if I was able to feel insecure despite the fortunate circumstances that we have been blessed with, it meant that I felt that something was missing. Because it was not a conscious train of thought, I was not sure what it was specifically.

I was aware, however, that brooding about it would do little good. I knew that from my past experiences, so I tried not read too much into the situation.

When we left the house, the sun was about to set.

In the end, I could not figure out what had me so bothered. But it seemed that both of them had fun and enjoyed themselves, so that was all that mattered.

"Mama, I gotta go pee-pee!" Was what Sorata had declared as we walked through the park on our way home.

I could not help but frown a little at that. He clearly went before he left Ryuu and Sougo-san's place, and it had been less than fifteen minutes since then. It was unusual for him to need to use the bathroom again this soon.

"Ah, Papa will go with you," Riku replied him before I could. "Tenn-nii, you have been quite tired today, haven't you? Don't push yourself too hard; I'll take him instead."

"I'm fine, Riku. My heat's already over, after all..."

"No, no, it's fine. Leave it to me." Riku placed a soft kiss on my cheek, to pacify me. "Just have a seat by the benches and wait for us. We'll be right back."

As always, I cannot say no to him, so I nodded. "All right."

I watched silently as they walked towards the public toilets, which was not far away.

At that moment, I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. It was from Anesagi-san, who was checking up on me. I reported to him that I was fine, and was able to return to work. He replied with a list of jobs that had been scheduled for next week.

Despite the fact that I had started modelling because of Kujou-san, I had decided to continue with that career after my contract with him had ended. Not only does it provide me with enough income to support our family, I also enjoyed the work enough to stick with it. Recently, however, I have been receiving more invitations to make more guest appearances in talk shows and drama serials.

At least, now that Sorata has Riku to look after him, I no longer have to worry about him feeling lonely.

"Mama!"

It had barely been a minute or two since they left me, so it was a bit of a surprise when I heard Sorata's voice. I looked up to see him and Riku standing a few steps in front of me, and I was confused.

There was no way that they could have returned from the washroom this quickly.

"Mama, here!"

Sorata had been hiding something behind his back, which he presented to me. It was a bouquet of nine red roses. He beckoned for me to take it, which I did. I could only return his bright smile with a confused glance.

Where did this come from, and what was going on?

"Papa, it's your turn!"

Sorata stepped aside, leaving Riku as the only one standing in front of me.

"Riku, just what—"

"Tenn-nii." Riku seemed unusually confident as he walked closer to me and got down on one knee. "I'm not sure if you remember, but we made a promise when we were young. That no matter what happens, or how much time has passed, we would always love each other. Back then, the word 'love' to us meant not hating each other, and that we would always think of the other person fondly. However, we have grown up and are no longer children. I'm sure that, just like how we have changed, the meaning of that word has too. To me, loving Tenn-nii now meant wanting us to be together, forever. To be able to see your smile every day. To be able to share each precious moment of our lives with each other. To never fail to rely on and support each other. To be able to hold you in my arms dearly and kiss you tenderly. To never let you leave me again. And, of course, to hold your hand and continue walking down the path of life with you."

I had not noticed that Riku had been holding a small box in his hand, which he opened and held up.

Inside it was a ring.

It cannot be...

"Tenn-nii, I have told you that I love you so many times. And I mean it each time. But I know that no matter how many times I do, I still felt that I had to give you something... some form of proof. That is why I want you to marry me, Tenn-nii. Let me become both your husband and mate. Let me be the lucky man who would love you for the rest of your life. I know it's not possible for our union to be legally recognised, because, but I want to be the one for you."

I could feel my chest tighten, and tears well up in my eyes.

"Riku... I..."

I did not know what to say. I was at a loss for words, in complete disbelief.

Ahh. I really am an idiot, am I not?

In the end, all my worrying really had been for nothing.

"Mama." Sorata placed his hands on my lap. "Sorata wants Mama and Papa to be together forever, too. Sorata wants Mama and Papa to be happy together."

My tears began to overflow as I tried to hold back a sob. But because I was overcome with so many emotions, I was unable to. Riku placed his hands on my face, wiping away the tears that had ran down my cheeks with a gentle smile.

"Will you become a Nanase again, for me?"

He was waiting for my answer.

There was only one that I could give to him.

Yet, because my heart felt so full, it took everything I had to say that one word.

"Yes..." I managed, raising my hands and holding them over his. "Yes."

I repeated myself twice, as I was unsure if I had managed to convey it the first time with my trembling voice.

Riku's gentle expression grew softer after he had heard my answer. He leaned forward to place a kiss on my forehead, followed one each on my cheekbones. And finally, one on my lips.

When he withdrew, he removed his hands from my face. He cradled my left hand in his palm, the other he used to retrieve the ring from the box which he had set down on the bench, next to me. He slid the band of silver metal, a portion of it forged into a knot, onto my ring finger. It was a perfect fit.

"How...?"

"I had planned to do this for a while now, so I took the measurements while you were asleep."

"Sorata helped Papa choose the ring!"

"I wanted to make this special, so I asked Nagi for advice on what I should do. The flowers were his suggestion, but making it a surprise was mine. I hope you don't dislike it?"

"Of course I don't. It's just that, I'm so happy that I don't know how I should feel..." As I tried to describe how I was feeling, Riku hugged me tightly. It was so sudden it came as a surprise. "R-Riku?"

"I'm feeling unbearably happy too, Tenn-nii. Thank you. For saying yes, and for everything."

I could tell by his voice that he was starting to cry as well. I wrapped my arms around him as well, holding him tightly.

Never once did I think that I deserved such happiness, or would be able to experience something like this.

"Riku, I love you."

Those words now felt different from the numerous times I have spoken them.

Surely, it was because there was no longer any doubt or worry lingering in my heart and weighing it down.

Once we both have calmed down, we continued our journey home. It was getting late, and the dark of night was beginning to set in. We still had yet to take our bath, and Sorata would soon be getting sleepy.

However, as we walked hand-in-hand, a thought suddenly came to me.

"That reminds me, though. How are going to tell Mom and Dad about this? I mean, they do accept the fact that we are staying together, but marriage and becoming mates are a completely different thing..."

"Ah, you don't have to worry about a thing! I already asked them for their blessings, and they gave it."

"Wait, when did you do that?"

"Back when I called home to tell that them that we intend to bring Sorata to visit them, back in August."

"So they knew that our relationship was of that nature? What was the use of me trying to hide it, then? No wonder they did not seem to bother how chummy we were..."

"Mom insisted on planning the wedding, so we'll have something to look forward to!"

"I simply hope that she won't overdo it..."

All concerns aside, we finally have taken another step forward in our relationship. As unexpected as it may have been, it only fills my heart with more warmth and joy than there already was.

It was only a matter of time when we would finally be able to become one again.

Not just in body but mind and spirit as well.

And never again will we be divided or separated from each other.

**"Epilogue - Tenn" end**


	57. Epilogue - Riku

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Written in Riku's POV**

The seasons have passed, and spring had come again.

That meant that a full year had passed since that fateful evening that I was reunited with Tenn-nii.

Looking back, so many things had happened between us that it felt hard to believe that it had only been that long. Well, at least it felt long to me. Perhaps to others, it may have been just one short year.

Everything had begun only because I had met Sorata. If I did not, I probably would ever have the chance to even meet Tenn-nii again, much less be able to get close to him. If that happened, I would still have continued living not knowing the truth of what happened after that day. I would have continued living with guilt and regret, without the chance to redeem myself.

Now that I think about it, everything had happened because of Sorata. And I am grateful for that fact.

If it were not for him, I would not be here today, getting married to the one person who I dearly loved. Or at least, be waiting to do so. There was still time before the ceremony is due to start, and preparations to be made.

The wedding ceremony was to be held at a chapel in the countryside, chosen by our mother. It was a small, private affair. We only invited those who were close to us, as well as our colleagues and those who had worked closely with us. As he had chosen to continue his job as a model, we tried to make things as discreet as possible.

Of the people we had invited, only our parents and Iori who I had asked to be my best man, as well as a handful of others knew that we were siblings. That had a huge implication, as the certificate that we had signed was not one of marriage, but of Tenn-nii and Sorata's names returning to the Nanase family register. If it was made known that we were brothers, it may cause a huge scandal that would affect Tenn-nii's career.

While making the preparations, our parents… well, at least our mother and Kujou-san had a short spat of whether we should hold a Japanese or Western style ceremony. Even she, who we inherited her stubbornness from, was not able to convince Kujou from insisting on the latter. However, she still insisted on making the preparations, and she did it so well that Kujou had nothing but compliments about it.

Tenn-nii's manager, Anesagi-san, had been the one to recommend white tuxedos for the wedding. He and our mother had become friends over tea and introduced her to a few shops, of which many of them were expensive and high-end brands. I was quite worried when Tenn-nii had his eye on one of them, but we managed to get them at an affordable price through personal connections. I had actually suggested for Tenn-nii to wear a wedding veil, but he turned the suggestion down as he felt that it was inappropriate. He said that it was because he was not a virgin and hence had no right to wear one.

Right now, I was wearing that tuxedo, waiting nervously in one of the waiting rooms. Tenn-nii was in the other, being attended to by Ryuu-san.

Sorata, who had been made the role of the ring bearer, was with our parents at the moment. Much to our surprise, he had come up with the idea of having our rings tied to each paw of his Mr Cat. When he did, Seira appeared briefly to me to express her support in regards to his suggestion, so I agreed to it.

As for the flower girl, Manami-chan was the first that came to our minds and she quickly agreed. However, because Sakuya-kun had thrown a bit of a tantrum about being left out, we let him share her role and made him a flower boy as well. Iori was worried that they would have been too overenthusiastic about their roles and throwing the petals, especially Manami-chan, so he took it upon himself to teach them.

Finding the groomsmen and officiant was easy. None of my colleagues was married, and all but one were male. Tamaki agreed right away, much to my surprise. I did not know who else to ask, but Banri-san volunteered when he saw me worried. As for the officiant, we both decided to ask Mitsuki, who was a talented speaker.

We had a bit of difficulty searching for bridesmaids since we had few female acquaintances. Tsumugi-san was the first that came to mind, and she agreed when I asked. There was also Tenn's adoptive sister Aya, who happened to be related to Tamaki by blood, who had flown in for the occasion. But the position of the maid... well, the man of honour had been given to Anesagi-san, the only person Tenn-nii said who could fit the role.

Looking back, the preparations had gone so smoothly that there had barely been anything for me to do. Perhaps it was because of that, I did not feel as nervous as I thought I would have been.

If anything, I was simply anxious and excited.

Earlier, when I had just settled down and had yet to change into the tuxedo, Kujou came over. All he did was give his congratulations and best regards before disappearing to where Tenn-nii was.

After that, many people came and gone. My parents, who were busy with the preparations before the guests came, along with Sorata who asked for a hug. Nagi and Mitsuki, too, as well as Sougo who came in with the younger two of his three children. His second child, unfortunately, was suffering a bad case of pollen allergy which had been unknown to him until now. He and the children had no choice but to stay indoors until someone returned with the medication, so I let them stay with me.

We had a bit of a chat while he tended to poor Haruto-kun, who was grouchy due to his allergies. Mitsuki, who had volunteered to drive to the nearest town, came in with the medication around the same time that Ryuu-san came to help me prepare.

Because it was my first time putting on make-up for anything at all, it felt awkward having to sit completely still and let my face and hair be touched by someone else. Ryuu-san was a professional and I knew that I could trust him. Despite that, I could not help but be conscious of how big his hands were as they worked quickly.

I was not sure how long he took, but I felt that he had taken less time than I had expected him to. I thought that he had done little, but noticed otherwise when I looked at myself in the mirror. I was amazed at subtle differences I could spot my face, more than how well he had arranged my hair.

It was then that I had received a very unexpected guest, who came knocking on the door of my waiting room.

"Yo, Nanase. Congratulations on your big day."

"Y-Yaotome-san?!"

"Why do you look so surprised to see me?"

"Well... to be honest, I didn't think that you'll come today...

"You did send me an invitation, didn't you? It would have been rude to not come after you had gone through the trouble of doing so. What, don't tell me you actually don't want me to come?"

"N-No, that's not it!"

For some reason, he laughed when he saw me troubled.

"I was just kidding, sheesh. Don't take everything so seriously, if not you'll end up being a killjoy like Tenn."

"Ah ha ha..."

"Anyway, I'm glad I chose to trust you. If it had not been for you, I would have chosen to But, if I had let Tenn go and you had failed to look after him properly, I would have let you meet your end... personally."

W-Was I being threatened?!

"Gaku, don't scare him like that!"

"It was a joke, Ryuu. Well, at least half of it was, anyway." Yaotome-san gave me a firm pat on the shoulder. "I'll catch up with you and Tenn some other time. See you later."

Ryuu-san excused himself and left with Yaotome-san so that he could store his tools in his car before coming back to look after his children. He carried Shizuki-kun, who had been asleep the entire time in his arms so that Sougo-san could focus on Haruto-kun, who had also fallen asleep after taking the medication.

Around the time that I was thinking about going to Tenn-nii's dressing room to see him, Iori entered to tell us that there were only fifteen minutes before the ceremony was due to start. Ryuu-san and Sougo-san returned to the chapel immediately with their children, while Iori went through the plan of the entire ceremony with me one more time to ensure that I had not forgotten anything.

After that, it was time.

I stood at the front of the chapel. At the moment, all eyes were on me, and I finally felt the butterflies begin to flutter in my tummy.

Iori seemed to notice how nervous I was getting, and gave me a hard slap on the back.

"You're being much too tense." He whispered. "Relax. You've worked hard for this very moment, haven't you? Have some pride and be confident."

I could only offer him an apologetic grin. However, no matter how hard I tried, it was difficult to release the tension in my shoulders and back.

That was why when the bridal march began playing, I nearly jumped in shock.

The bridesmaids entered from the back, followed by the man of honour.

After them was the ring bearer.

Sorata looked just as nervous as I was, as he took slow steps down the carpeted aisle towards the altar. He held the cat plush toy in both hands, arm stretched out. His posture did nothing to hide how tense he was. Looking at him made me wonder if that was how I seemed to everyone else, and I could finally feel my shoulders relax a bit upon seeing how adorable he was.

Behind Sorata were the flower boy and girl, Sakuya-kun and Manami-chan. Despite how they were always butting heads with each other, they were surprisingly in sync today. I wonder if it was due to Iori teaching them.

And behind them was, finally, Tenn-nii who was holding a bouquet of white and pink flowers. As always, he was beautiful and stunning, more so with the simple make-up that Ryuu-san had done for me. He was escorted by Kujou, whose smile looked closer to being a smirk.

However, it was only when he was just a few steps away from me that I had noticed something that was off.

At first glance, I thought that Tenn-nii's hair was simply styled neatly in a way that kept it off the nape of his neck. I did not think that he had actually cut it short, back to the length he used to keep it at when he was still in school. That meant that his hairstyle was now one which matched my own. It made me feel touched, and I had to force myself from keeping that silly smile from forming on my lips.

Kujou said nothing when he entrusted Tenn-nii to me. His gaze alone conveyed everything he wanted to tell me.

Tenn-nii and I now stood side by side, facing the altar together.

The ceremony began promptly. Mitsuki came up to the podium, addressing us and the congregation with a brief welcome before beginning his speech. As expected of Mitsuki, it was upbeat and lively, and there were times that it made everyone laugh.

And after he had wrapped it up, it was time for the most important part: for us to exchange our vows.

Tenn-nii and I turned to face each other.

We had both decided to write our own vows, instead of following the one we were provided while planning the ceremony. I was a bit at a loss at what exactly I should say, wanting to keep it short and simple. Eventually, I went to Nagi for advice. All he told me was to be true to my heart and Tenn-nii, which was not exactly the answer I was looking

Still, I hope I can remember what I want to say… I tend to forget these things when I get jittery.

At the very least, I was able to pick up the wireless microphone without dropping it.

As I spoke, I looked at Tenn-nii in the eye, gazing at him softly. The way he looked at me gently made my heart skip a beat, but I did not feel nervous anymore. Probably it was because I was filled with so much love for him that I could not feel anything else at all.

"I, Nanase Riku, vow to always be by your side for the rest of my life. To love and care for you, in sickness and in good health, in good times and bad. As long as I am here, never again will I let you bear all your burdens alone. You would no longer have to fear the darkness because I will be there to hold and protect you from everything. Because you are the one who I chose to hold in my arms."

Those were my true and most sincere feelings, and I did my best to put them into words.

Because I know that there is no one in this world who I could ever love as much as him.

A brief moment passed after I was done, and on cue Tenn-nii slowly raised his microphone to his lips.

"I, Kujou Tenn, vow to never leave your side again. Even in sickness and in good health, in good times and bad, I will never let go of your hand until the inevitable time comes that we would have to part comes. I will entrust everything that is mine with you, the person whom I dearly love. With you by my side, I am sure that all of the days we spend together will bright as the sun."

His words warmed my heart, and I could feel tears of happiness forming in the corner of my eye.

The next was the exchange of the wedding rings. Sorata brought them to us, beaming brightly as the nervousness from before seemed to have disappeared.

I untied the white ribbon that tied the ring to the paw of the plush carefully and held the ring between the thumb and index finger of my right hand. I held out my left hand for Tenn-nii to place his in and slid it slowly onto his finger.

Tenn-nii did the same for me.

With that, we have both received the symbol of our union and our bond.

"Alright everyone, now it's time for your favourite part of the ceremony: the first kiss as a married couple! I now pronounce the both of you. husband and husband."

Mitsuki made it sound light-hearted on purpose, as he figured out how nervous both I and Tenn-nii were thinking about this very moment during our preparations. But right now, the only thing in my mind was Tenn-nii. It no longer mattered that we were in front of the congregation, or how hard they were staring at them.

I took one step forward towards him, which was all that was need to close the distance between us.

I brushed aside the locks of hair that framed his face and cupped his cheeks gently. Tenn-nii used his right hand, as the other was holding the bouquet, to do the same. Slowly, we brought our faces closer together until our lips found each other.

I could hear the cheers and applause from the congregation. In particular, Nagi's voice stood out the loudest.

When we parted, I took his hand and held it tightly.

"I love you, Tenn-nii."

"I love you, Riku."

We both professed our love to each other at the same moment, an unexpected coincidence, and that made us smile.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I now present to you, the newly wedded couple!"

The voices of the congregation grew louder, and everyone was standing and shouting out words of congratulations.

There was still a reception for the group of guests gathered, held in the banquet hall of the nearby hotel. All there was left for this ceremony was the recessional, where Tenn-nii and I would leave the chapel together.

We had planned to take Sorata with us, with him being carried in my arms, as we did. That was because we felt that he was also an important part of our family and happiness.

Because of this, my eyes turned to where Sorata was sitting, which was at the front with his friends and our parents.

However, I saw something that came as a rude shock.

Sorata was being kissed by Sakuya-kun! And on the lips too!

"S-S-S-Sorata?" I was stammering, unable to say anything from the shock that had hit hard.

Because of me, Tenn-nii had noticed too.

"Oh, my." He was just as surprised as I was, and by now everyone had realised what was going on.

"Sakuya!" Ryuu-san was flustered, running over from the pew behind theirs to separate his son from ours.

Sakuya-kun gave him and everyone around a confused look, not understanding the implication of what he did or why all the adults were looking at him. "What?"

"Sakuya, just what were you thinking?"

"Sorata-kun said before that he'll marry me, right? So since we're wearing clothes that look like Uncle Tenn and Sensei, it means that we can get married today too so I kissed him! So since I kissed him, it means that we're married now, right?"

"You can't get married until you become adults!"

"This idiot son of mine..." Sougo-san sighed out loud, hiding his face.

"Ryuu-san, that's not the point!" I cried out. "Sorata's first kiss! That kid took our adorable little angel's first kiss! Tenn-nii! We have to do something about that!"

"Riku, I don't believe that's the point either..."

"Mama, did I do something bad...?"

"Oh, no, it's not your fault, Sorata. Please ignore your Papa."

"Saku-kun and Sora-kun, sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N—"

"Manami!"

When Mitsuki gave his stern warning without moving from his position at the podium, almost everyone laughed.

This unexpected and relatively scandalous incident aside, the rest of the day went on as planned.

We left for the airport for our honeymoon after the dinner reception was over. It had been arranged for us by Kujou-san, to one of his private estates by the beach.

The only unfortunate matter was that we were unable to take Sorata with us. He had already started elementary school and could not afford to skip classes, so he would be taken care of at our home by our parents who would stay with him in our apartment while we were away. But that was not the only reason why he could not come along with us.

While I do look forward to being able to spend time with Tenn-nii, just the two of us, I felt a little sad at the thought of not being able to see his smile for that long. Unsurprisingly, it was the same for Tenn-nii.

In exchange for being absent, we told ourselves that we would give him lots of hugs and kisses when we return home to him.

That moment, I am sure, would be the true start of our lives as a family.

**"Epilogue - Riku" end**

**\- "Song of the Sun" complete, 1st April 2018-**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Author's Afterword**
> 
>  
> 
> Hello everyone, Toki here! Song of the Sun's main story is finally finished! I hope you have enjoyed it from the start to the end!
> 
> I'm not sure if I mentioned this before, but I really never intended for this to become a full-length story, much less a series. I've always avoided doing multi-chapter stories as many of them end up being left half-written, due to my tendency to create new ideas and plots quickly. I did not intend to write or plan this seriously either, so most of the first few chapters were just written on the fly. Somehow, I ended up getting serious, and here we are now.
> 
> A bit of personal matters on my side, I actually don't remember why I decided to continue this. I was in a period when I was constantly stressed out and every little thing that happened got to me. It was so bad that it affected my work and I even neglected my health. I also had a rift with my childhood friend and she still refuses to speak to me even now. I'm only human and did end up very depressed about it. All in all, I won't deny that I wrote this as a distraction, but working on this series really have made me realise a lot of things. I'm no longer as depressed or bummed about many things that had happened, although I can say that I'm not the same person I used to be.
> 
> As always, there are people to be thanked. They are [Nezu Dango](https://www.facebook.com/doujinkanezudango/), who did the character design and all visuals thus far, and [orpheusheart](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orpheusheart), our to-go person for idea-bouncing and all sorts of advice (writing and otherwise). And of course, reminding me to put self-care (such as sleep) before this series. The three of us got closer around January, around the time after my birthday in which I became quite nihilistic, especially towards human relationships and saying stupid things like not needing friends and all. But the two of them have become more than friends to me, and words cannot express how grateful I am to them. I want to keep creating more and more works with them.
> 
> Now that the main story is finished, I'm going to take a week of writing to play games. Despite all the spoilers I have yet to start Idolish7's Vita game, plus now that A3's new summer story is up, so I'm going to have to rack up EXP to unlock it. Well, that is what I say, but knowing me I'll probably start writing something again in three to four days.
> 
> For those who do not know, I now post updates on plans for future fics will be posted on [ko-fi](https://ko-fi.com/nazotoki). Well, plans are just plans and are subject to change. There is also a [google site](https://sites.google.com/view/song-of-the-sun/home) for the series, although it's mostly spoiler territory if you intend to follow future works for this series. I'm still working on it progressively, so expect some of the content to change when I do.
> 
> The next major work for this series will be Ryuu and Sougo's backstory, "At first glance" that met its goal on ko-fi. This one will begin in May and would also be uploaded in parts. 
> 
> There is also a new ko-fi goal titled "Spicy Cinnamon, Sweet Vanilla", which covers Riku and Tenn's honeymoon; please check it out at my page there. On the side, I may do extra stories if I can properly plot any, since I have quite a few ideas floating around.
> 
> Again, thank you for your comments, and for sticking with "Song of the Sun" right to the very end! Farewell, for now!
> 
> お疲れ様でした！！！

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Sorata's Big Adventure](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13843335) by [amamiya_toki](https://archiveofourown.org/users/amamiya_toki/pseuds/amamiya_toki)




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